You need to understand that life, in general, is a merical really. To. be born in a human body on this magnificent planet and live in this amazing Thailand which is just the right distance from the right sized star which has a magnetic core that gives us protection from the sun, the water, the moon. Its impossibly perfect to be born in this situation. I recommend that you take your wife to the bedroom and give her an oil massage. Make love to her. Maybe make a baby. You will be happy then. I have a child and its the best thing in life. I do not focus on myself at all. If this advise doesn't help you please go and see a psychiatrist.