sipi

Good idea. As your wifes parents get older she will want to spend more time with them and it will help if you are both nearby.

Thereby limiting the amount of time she has for you possibly causing issues in your own relationship,if you wish to play second fiddle to her family go for it.

Do let us know how it pans out though.

14 years and panning out well, Who wants to be stuck in a box with their partner 24 hours s day? We both enjoy having family around. This is actually quite common worldwide believe it or not.

Yes that's why all these expat men live in Thailand,they are so close to their remaining family in their birth countries most live 7,000 miles away and never go back.

Do you jet back to your home country to visit your relatives every 3 months ?

I trust your really close to your relatives are you or just your extended Thai family,the love that some expats have for their Thai families is quite astonishing given most have abandoned blood relatives in favour of said Thais.

I suppose for some of them it's all they have to resemble what they once failed at back home maybe.

We have 4 generations of family living close by here in Australia.

Sure there are times when I mow my brothers lawn or have to drive my Mother to the doctors but that is life. My wife enjoys having them around,and in spite of being the only Thai in a population of 4000 she has never been refered to as a "blow in".

Of course we Westerners are far superior to these juvenile Thais....apparently.

Good idea. As your wifes parents get older she will want to spend more time with them and it will help if you are both nearby.

Thereby limiting the amount of time she has for you possibly causing issues in your own relationship,if you wish to play second fiddle to her family go for it.

Do let us know how it pans out though.

So which of the three Thai girls went home with you after that episode?

I am an old Australian living in the tropics. This 40 degree Australian heat and 90% humidity doesn't bother me.

In Thailand I feel like I am dying 10 months of the year.

I wouldn't do it, but if you must why not build a very cheap house there and buy house to retire in somewhere else, then you always have a house to live in when you and the Mrs want to go back.

Emphasize "very cheap" because if typical, the house will be trashed while you are away.

I do agree with Tonrays post to build something cheap (but not for that reason).

Just do something simple for now, and if things don't work out you haven't lost a fortune. The traditional Thai building method makes it very easy to extend or "add on" later if you are happy. And plan to escape occasionally (with the wife) for some "us" time.

Edit. It is normal for a Thai daughter to want to be close to her parents as they get older. I would never deny my wife that. You need to do the sums and work out what is best. Live far away and spend more time apart and money on traveling, or live nearby?

No matter where you live, you are going to have neighbors (unless you are literally in a rice paddy). All neighbors can cause trouble.

Better the devil you know?

The other thing I find an advantage of having the family very close by is that the wife spends a lot of time with them. It gives me a break (and gives her a break from me).

Anyway back to Davos original post. We built next door to the inlaws but for now it is only a holiday house. It sits vacant 10 months a year until I retire. In the meantime the inlaws look after it, otherwise (if it wasn't next door to the inlaws) it would possibly get broken into.

Presently we are only there two months a year. Frankly I couldn't think of anything worse than being in Thailand and not being around my family. But they are very honest and fun folk.

I am sure the likes of Charlie have good reason for changing their mind and I look forward to hearing why.

I wouldn't do it, but if you must why not build a very cheap house there and buy house to retire in somewhere else, then you always have a house to live in when you and the Mrs want to go back.

Emphasize "very cheap" because if typical, the house will be trashed while you are away.

Really? Can you provide some photos? None of the houses in our village have been trashed.

I applaud you for finding a great village that maintains their properties...but everywhere I have been in country....and that includes Bangkok...the homes are a mess because zero maintenance is done, rubbish is disposed of by throwing it out in the alley between houses or right out front if that becomes too much work. if you build a house that stands vacant for any length of time in Thailand, odds are it will be a wreck in no time. Not just my opinion...when I travel again I will get some photographic evidence but I also implore you to take off the rose colored glasses when you are out and about,.

We built next door to the inlaws and they look after our house when we are away. Same with my neighbour. A lick of paint, grass trimmed etc.

I wouldn't do it, but if you must why not build a very cheap house there and buy house to retire in somewhere else, then you always have a house to live in when you and the Mrs want to go back.

Emphasize "very cheap" because if typical, the house will be trashed while you are away.

Good idea. As your wifes parents get older she will want to spend more time with them and it will help if you are both nearby.

I failed....fortunately.

I found true love in a small village when I least expected it. It was just my lucky day.

From my experience Thai air-conditioning tradesmen aren't as dumb as TVF experts pretend they are.

Trust your local technician, he is trying to help.

You misunderstand me, I'm not implying that the technician who came to my house is dumb! I was dumb giving the measurements to the store, rather than working it out for myself.

He told me that I needed a 70,000 BTU aircon to cover the entire open plan area and also suggested that I install another aircon in the living room. When I got round to googling BTU based on area, he was absolutely right - even more so now that I've read another poster's comments who pointed out that cold air will not go upstairs, so another similar sized unit fitted in the living room would work pretty well downstairs (his recommendation).

But I don't need to cool the entire downstairs area - which is why I'm still wondering whether its better to have one unit that keeps the small area in which I'm interested, cool (but is working flat out for hours), or whether its more economical to use an air con unit(s) that cost more per hour, but won't be working flat out all the time.

The aircon in the bedroom at nights already adds 1,500 bht p.m. (approx) to my elec bill, and my normal elec bill is close to 4,000 p.m. - which is why I'm concerned about the most economical option for when I need to use downstairs aircon during the day.

Yes Dick, I agree.

What I meant to say was, from my experience it is best to consult a technician on-site and take his advice. They are trained to help.

From my experience Thai air-conditioning tradesmen aren't as dumb as TVF experts pretend they are.

Trust your local technician, he is trying to help.

I prefer cleavage. But it is easier to get caught.

The problem I am having now is .....

Having lost my business over here, no more superannuation, no house anymore, just renting now

That's why she wants a divorce.

She was with you for the money, and now it's gone, so is she.

Wrong. The carers pension is quite generous for younger Thais caring for their older husbands. Far more than she will make in a Thai village. I believe around $500 (15000bt) a week, plus allowances.

Thank you for all your comments and excuse me not to answer every comment separately

I just like to point out a few things

Yes I am older then she is but I am sure she has nobody else ( she does not like sex at all )

Yes I can read her e-mails (she does not know)

Yes she is on Facebook and Line but I know her password too

There is nothing to suggest she is talking to some one else and yes she is the only one

in the family who cares about her parents nobody else does, it has got nothing to do with money

I guess, she says she will still support me even if we are not together anymore, that means

financial support

Now I had to fill in a form for Centerlink to prove that we are separated ( still living under the same roof)

So she defiantly want's a divorce you can only get if you separated for 2 years in WA

The problem I am having now is .....

Having lost my business over here, no more superannuation, no house anymore, just renting now

I can survive but my life is going to be hell a few more years I might be going in to a nursing home

( well I can forget about that one since you have to have a deposit of about $20.000 )

hard to save up on a pension and yes my nephew lives with us but obviously he sticks with

his auntie even so he gets abused verbally by her as well

But that is all I guess I just have to talk some times

OP who the hell has she been talking to and associating with?

My experience in Australia is that a Thai wife doesn't just decide to leave her husband of 14 years unless some old Thai farm hen has been chirping in her ear.

100%

When you get powdered during Songkran and look like the Statue of Liberty covered in birdshit.

The scooter you are riding disintegrates from beneath you, leaving you skidding along on your ass.

You find the only cheesecake in Northern Thailand, and eat it.

You shower entirely by feel.

You pay your "partner" to trim your toenails.