mark45y
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Posts posted by mark45y
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Who knows more about marriage a guy who has been married a bunch of times with a bunch of kids and got divorced a bunch of times or a guy who has only been married once with no children? One has experience but his experiences have been failures?
Who knows more about married women in Thailand a guy who is married to a Thai woman but does not live in Thailand or a guy who lives in Thailand and watches the goings on of married women who have foreign husbands? I guess it depends if your wife is different.
That many men would bet their life savings on a game with 50/50 odds has always been a source of amazement to me? And subtract from that the difficulties of a cross cultural relationship. Wow.
Like most things in life you ONLY usually here the disaster stories and guess where they end up????
Of course i never said how many girlfriends id had over the years before deciding to marry??
Id say it makes no difference if you live in Thailand or not as to whether your wife will cheat, if shes the type to cheat shell do it wherever you are.
I wouldnt say the odds are 50/50 if you know the horse your'e betting on.
Don't get me wrong. I am not saying you will not be successful. I am only writing about a man who looks at the odds in general and not a particular woman or man as the case may be. You are of course right for every 1 disaster there is one happy outcome. But that is still only 50/50 odds. On a happy note I never had a Thai wife leave me or steal anything from me.
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Who knows more about marriage a guy who has been married a bunch of times with a bunch of kids and got divorced a bunch of times or a guy who has only been married once with no children? One has experience but his experiences have been failures?
Who knows more about married women in Thailand a guy who is married to a Thai woman but does not live in Thailand or a guy who lives in Thailand and watches the goings on of married women who have foreign husbands? I guess it depends if your wife is different.
That many men would bet their life savings on a game with 50/50 odds has always been a source of amazement to me? And subtract from that the difficulties of a cross cultural relationship. Wow.
Like most things in life you ONLY usually here the disaster stories and guess where they end up????
Of course i never said how many girlfriends id had over the years before deciding to marry??
Id say it makes no difference if you live in Thailand or not as to whether your wife will cheat, if shes the type to cheat shell do it wherever you are.
I wouldnt say the odds are 50/50 if you know the horse your'e betting on.
Quite right. After 28 years of marriage in the UK it only took a few months here for my ex to realise that he was suddenly the most attractive guy in the world (the local women didn't care one iota that he was married)...
No difference between the West and Thailand at all...
Does it follow then that Thai women would be a better bet because they know of the intense competition for men from the West?
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I don't see gregb as ranting.
Are you sure that you want to admit that?
Admittedly this is the first of gregb's posts that I've seen - but he has a point.
Thailand is likely to make life more difficult for us foreigners in the near future, but the West has far more problems.
No country (as far as I know) hates Thailand - but there are many countries that hate the West.
Terrorism is going to be a problem in the West for years to come, and at the moment, they are making even more enemies.
Last time I checked terrorism was one of Thailand's major problems.
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It all comes down to 3 things water, energy, and arable land. North America is sitting pretty. It is the only region that is energy self sufficient if the USA was forced into some conservation measures. It also has water resources and full fertile lands along with the natural fertilizers needed to make things grow. Countries susceptible to water shortages and energy shortages are in deep trouble. Thailand is one of those countries at risk as its key water supplies flow out of regions dominated by China. Thailand is an energy importer and it will not be able to pay the increased costs of energy imports without societal pain.
America can't do anything without energy.
Farmers can't plant or harvest crops, come the end of the oil, America will self destruct in a couple of weeks, the people in the cities will devastate the countryside like a plague of locusts. Half the country will freeze to death in the first winter.
Thailand doesn't actually need anything from the outside world.
For example, my wifes farm is planted and harvested by hand, we are surrounded by mountains full of water.
They don't need any electricity or oil to live, but it is nice to have.
If I were to choose where to live when the energy ran out, America would be the last place on earth to choose.
You seem to know very little about surviving Peak Oil!
Where does Thailand get the money to run the government? Who pays the taxes? What does Thailand export besides rice?
When you think about oil in the US I would advise thinking about oil in North America and offshore oil that has not been tapped. Oh and don't forget shale oil deposits.
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Who knows more about marriage a guy who has been married a bunch of times with a bunch of kids and got divorced a bunch of times or a guy who has only been married once with no children? One has experience but his experiences have been failures?
Who knows more about married women in Thailand a guy who is married to a Thai woman but does not live in Thailand or a guy who lives in Thailand and watches the goings on of married women who have foreign husbands? I guess it depends if your wife is different.
That many men would bet their life savings on a game with 50/50 odds has always been a source of amazement to me? And subtract from that the difficulties of a cross cultural relationship. Wow.
I left my first wife to go to war. She played around on me and we later got a divorce.
I left my second wife because of work for 6 months and she played around on me and we later got a divorce.
First wife was a school teacher and the second wife was a department store executive.
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If the last 10 years has taught me anything its that life is unpredictable, certain things are predictable though
Basic needs: Food, Water, electricity, jobs, place to live
Things I didn't see coming 9/11, UK bombings, Madrid train bombings, 2 tsunami's, Hurricane katrina, unrest in the middle east thats spreading like wildfire, advancement in technology ( iphone ), Low Cost Airline Carriers. The rise of twitter and facebook. The US elects george bush not once but twice.
In the next 10 years will have a real demographics problem with aging populations meaning having to pay more in taxes to take care of the elderly. Many countries include China, Japan, USA, South Korea etc. On a side note at the moment many of these same countries are actually having a decrease in populations.
In the next 10 years the USA will no longer be a major player, look for china and india to be major players how they shape and change economies on all scales will be one thing. As far as thailand goes, realitically there won't be much change due to
1. Corruption
There is one thing that will change thailand but the outcome will depend on the people here.
If the USA is not a major player who will tell China not to turn of Thailand's water?
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my first question would be ... do you have any kids. not find out in 6 months time she has two back home . when you are crazey over her. and them say .what the heck . james hat yai . ps and then the trouble starts
They all have one or two back home did you not know ?
Given a familiarity with the female anatomy this is usually easy to determine.
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Ask for her CV. No, I'm serious. Almost all Thais that working have one. Most of the younger people use the MS CV format. It makes for an interesting read. One can ask with the preface, so I can understand your past life experiences.
Ask if she is ok having a full medical exam.
I have taught a course for 4 years in Thailand on CV (resume) writing. If you assume that my students talked to 3 friends each. Well chances are you may have seen one of my resumes. Depending on how you view my credibility you may draw your own conclusions.
I completely agree on the medical exam. I have discovered many things from that information. One lady had no vaccinations. However you must get the lady and doctor to include you in the discussion of the test results and get them in writing. I used to date a nurse and was in a clinic when she and the DR gave a woman positive HIV results. The woman was not phased at all and the entire conversation revolved around not telling her BF who was in the waiting room the results. I figure if I am paying for the tests I should get the results. I have never had a problem explaining this to the doctor or lady concerned.
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Nor young, braless, wet t-shirt clad women grinding eachother in the streets like in some areas.
Where does this happen - EXACTLY ?
Been to or tried to avoid Songkran in five or six different cities. Most and loveliest girls I found were at Central dancing on temporary stages all around the mall in Chiang Mai.
The only place I have ever seen bra less women were on Soi Six in Pattaya. But they were not amateurs by any means.
I would also be interested where appropriate found this behavior occurring in Issan.
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As far as your comment on drugs is concerned, that is a very small minority and more indicative to prostitution in North America or Europe.
Not sure you're right about that Ian.
I don't know about up country but in Bangkok drugs are widespread among the bar girl community and regular used by more girls than you can imagine.
At least that's my experience but then maybe I date the wrong women.
You may or may not know but I am really down on drugs. Don't like them. Have seen too many bad things as a result of them. A couple of things about bar girls and drugs. 1. They take them to stay skinny. This is also very true in Thai only communities. I don't know if the prescription drugs given are much better as they both have bad side effects. This is an industry wide problem. 2. The momma san sometimes pushes drugs as another source of income and a facilitator of fun and games.
The ladies get off work at the bar and head to the disco to party and that is a drug heavy scene.
In the past five years there has been a rapid increase in drug use both in the bar and after work at the clubs. You can spot a coyote dancer a mile away from the extreme skinny appearance. Thighs the size of my wrist can't be natural.
In some bars 95% of the ladies have Thai giks and I have never seen a Thai gik who was not into drugs.
Someone has to pay for them as the guys don't work.
It is a major problem and is not getting better. The main offenders being the Thai side of the industry. Seems to me that the average Falang likes women darker and heavier than the average Thai.
About the towel issue and embarrassment that I forgot to post above. It is obvious that a Thai good girl wife still takes off her clothes under a towel with her husband after 20 years of marriage so it is more cultural than any other issue. Also, even sisters still use a towel when changing and after 30 years sisters can't be embarrassed among each other. A towel has nothing to do with being embarrassed about being a prostitute.
It is also obvious to me that Falangs are far more embarrassed about being with a prostitute than it bothers the ladies. One only has to read Thai Visa for a while to figure that out. Not so much making up new identities for the GF but in the sometimes tedious recitation of the academic and moral qualifications of the significant other. When introducing a woman in West it is rare to be burdened with a complete resume by the male doing the introducing in the first five minutes of the conversation. For example, “Hi this is my girlfriend, she is a Harvard MBA and her parents own two banks and her grandfather invented canned tuna fish and her aunt came over with the Pilgrims.” If you get my meaning.
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On the towel question, it's probably because they really don't want you to see them, they don't really like you, and they don't really want to be in that situation at all. Who could ever get over that?
Have you ever had a relationship with a bar girl?
Have you ever lived with a bar girl and her family?
Have you ever met a bar girls parents?
Have you spent much time in brothels in Thailand?
I would submit that you don't have a clue about what you are writing in this area.
Naive is an understatement.
Yours is the typical, defensive, psuedo-intellectual response intended to devalue an opinion you don't agree with. To me, however, what you say above is meaningless since I don't believe a person must experience everything in the world before one can have an opinion about it. If this were true, then no one could comment on politics, religion, etc., until they've been a PM or a legislator, or a monk/nun, (or dated a bar girl). This is nonsense, of course. This is why humans have the capacity for empathy and understanding.
It still remains true that many "ladies of the night" don't like it and only do it for the money, or for drugs, or whatever. Hence, some are embarrassed by it.
Glad you came back Jawnie. People should know some things about people simply because they are people too. I would agree with that. But your experience and education does not serve you well in trying to understand bar girls.
It is like trying to learn to speak Thai without understanding tones. You can learn English paying almost no attentions to the tonal implications of words, not so Thai.
You mention politics and religion and yes everyone has an opinion but that is hardly knowledge. Looking at the behavior of monks or politicians from a distance without some in depth study will lead you to false conclusions.
You don't have the information to make any accurate conclusions about bar girls.
Thai Visa is a unique resource about things Thai. There are people here who understand the Thai system from years of study and experience living in Thailand for many years.
I would imagine there are over 1000 regular posters who have married bar girls and are living with them in Thailand and have for more than 10 years each. There are posters on Thai Visa who own brothels and who have lived in brothels and speak fluent Thai to bar girls on a regular basis and have for many years in all parts of the country.
I know three generations of bar girls. A 60 year old grandmother, her daughter 35 and her grand daughter 20 who are all still in the business and I am not alone in this knowledge.
People who come to Thailand and a year later are voicing opinions and giving advice about things Thai are usually not very well informed. Interesting to read as we all go through stages of learning.
You are out of your depth here. Best you listen and learn. Or go out and see for yourself without your Western baggage on your back. A lady writing a story many years ago about Playboy bunnies went out and got a job at a Playboy club to understand the system and inner workings of Bunny life. She wrote a decent story. Journalists writing about war get assigned to a combat unit.
If you want to know anything about bar girls or bar life feel free to ask. But you don't have the qualifications to be telling anybody anything about it yet.
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I try and stay ahead of the game. Though not a brilliant linguist I have a basic understanding of a few words of Thai. I can go into a bar and tell you if the ladies are from Issan or not. Sometimes I keep my mouth shut and listen and that can be illuminating as well.
Duke is a fun woman. She is a cougar, having more men, money and fun than most Catholic girls in boarding school on a field trip to Bangkok.
When listening to Duke and my current GF talk and joining in the conversation I am both educated and entertained.
Yesterday they had a long phone conversation. Normally I don't eavesdrop because I am polite but I will admit to listening on occasion.
However I was at a loss to understand them or I understood less than I normally understand.
After the call I inquired of my lady, “What the heck language were you and Duke speaking?” She replied ,like I was the dummy, “Pasa Lom Sak.”
Where are you going in Thai, “by ni.” Lao or Issan, “by sai.” Lom Sak, “by young.”
It it too much. These simple farm girls speaking three languages. If I want to visit their home city I am again in the same situation I was years ago. A dummy in paradise not knowing what they are saying. I spend countless hours of study to figure out if that young handsome man is a brother or a gik and now they throw another language at me.
So where can I get a Lom Sak language on line dictionary?????
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But a timid troll. Or the troll got out trolled.
Here was established a topic of interest with many posts and the OP fled the scene rather than play with the trolls trolling the troll.
Pity. But I guess there are shy trolls. Now we may never know about his peculiar linguistic habits.
We are all according to some definition trolls at one time or another. Who cares, it's content.
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I find it very ironic that a guy that got the Nobel peace prize is again bombing the crap out of another Middle eastern country.
All in the name of PEACE no doubt ?
I also so a video saying he has just signed a Presidential decree that allows him to incarcerate a person for the rest of their life even after a court of law have found them innocent of all charges but simply on the say so of this ego maniac. Frightening ! Really frightening !
Document please.
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Some of the recommendations by the UN to improve US human rights.
Iran said that the US should enact legislation against insulting the Qur’an, and make “Islamophobia illegal.
Mexico said the US should stop thinking Mexicans try and sneak into the US.
Libya said the US should stop racial discrimination in the Social Security program.
North Korea said the US should stop helping help North Korean refugees.
No one likes Guantanamo Bay or a recent Arizona law, S.B. 1070.
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On the towel question, it's probably because they really don't want you to see them, they don't really like you, and they don't really want to be in that situation at all. Who could ever get over that?
Have you ever had a relationship with a bar girl?
Have you ever lived with a bar girl and her family?
Have you ever met a bar girls parents?
Have you spent much time in brothels in Thailand?
I would submit that you don't have a clue about what you are writing in this area.
Naive is an understatement.
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Actually, The Heart of Darkness wasn't "really" about Africa - just a convenient setting. Just as Apocalypse Now wasn't about SE Asia....just another convenient setting.
I have read three scripts of Apocalypse Now. They are all very different. I have also read the heavily censored texts of the CIA in SEA 1960 to 1970. The CIA reports were written by a guy named Ahern I think (the CIA began to insert people in North Vietnam by swift boat in the early 60's). It came across to me that the people running the CIA were veterans of WW II and had learned almost nothing from the success and failures of the OSS during WW II. Also there is a more complete version of the movie out now with scenes that were not included with the original.
Seems to me that the director changed almost everything for dramatic effect and given the characters he had to work with.
It is interesting to see where the actors don't follow the script or the entire thing gets changed to protect the sensibilities of the audience. The playmate scene was completely changed. Gore is OK but sex still has to be mom and apple pie (shades of Thai Visa).
Terrorism is dealt with in Catch 22 also but in a more lighthearted way.
The "Catch-22" is that "anyone who wants to get out of combat duty, isn't really crazy. Hence, pilots who request a mental fitness evaluation are sane, and therefore must fly in combat. At the same time, if an evaluation is not requested by the pilot, he will never receive one (i.e. they can never be found "insane"), meaning he must also fly in combat.
I think the answer to the "murder or terrorism" lies in the Catch 22 idea. But it is too early early in the day for me to work it out. I only mention it so others may explain it to me because I am feeling mentally lazy right now.
You would have loved to browse my Father's files - NSA attache' in SE Asia, 1950s-1970s
I would love to. Why don't you publish them?
I guess it is a character flaw that I don't take the terror thing to seriously.
If you read about the wars of independence from colonialism in SEA they are filled with gore. Russia was by principle obliged to support wars of liberation from imperialism and now the US and UK are obliged to support wars of liberation from dictatorships. Democracy will not be the result of either. The USSR supported the first wave of liberation and that resulted in a dictator taking over and now the West is supporting the second wave of liberation and I guess that will result in a theocracy in the middle east and anyone's guess in Asia.
What strikes me is the utter foolishness of governments. Don't they read? Iraq and Afghanistan, Egypt, Syria, Yemen, Libya?
Closer to home, read about Cambodia and Laos from 1940 to 1970. I'll admit there are still big blocks of text blacked out but the information is all there.
To quote another poster, “If brains were dynamite, our governments wouldn't have enough to blow their hats off.”
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Once upon a time I ran a really fancy restaurant. A blind guy came in with his dog. I told him I would take him to his table and assist him in any way he desired but he insisted on bringing his dog. I refused and he called the cops. He was quite adamant about the issue. The cops came and I learned my lesson. I apologised to the blind man and promised all concerned I would never do it again. After that I got used to dogs in even a white table cloth hi so restaurant. No problems.
Actually, the initial theme and subsequent fodder for this thread has really nothing to do with dogs in restaurants....but instead the angst and disgust is directed towards the usual suspects of the Thai culture and their different practices. The dog aspect is just a guised conduit to drive a means to an end.
Ya, I know. Too bad. The place I stop for espresso daily (25 baht) has a resident pug dog. The dog is old as the hills. She comes and peacefully sniffs my shoes under the table and goes to sleep while I drink my coffee. I could go to Black Canyon and pay three times as much but I kind of like the dog and small businesses in general. The espresso has a bit too much Robusta for my taste but for 25 baht I can't complain.
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If I get a choice of table beside a dog or children then the dog will get me every time.
Dogs in restaurants are a no no. There is nothing worse than when you are settling down and enjoying a good meal, than to see a blood engorged grey tick slowly climbing up the wall.
The last time I checked seeing eye dogs were allowed in all restaurants in the US (by law).
Don't know about the rest of the world.
So your statement about dogs being a no no in restaurants is incorrect.
The exception proves the rule, Mark... though I'm on the side of the dogs myself!
Once upon a time I ran a really fancy restaurant. A blind guy came in with his dog. I told him I would take him to his table and assist him in any way he desired but he insisted on bringing his dog. I refused and he called the cops. He was quite adamant about the issue. The cops came and I learned my lesson. I apologised to the blind man and promised all concerned I would never do it again. After that I got used to dogs in even a white table cloth hi so restaurant. No problems.
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Actually, The Heart of Darkness wasn't "really" about Africa - just a convenient setting. Just as Apocalypse Now wasn't about SE Asia....just another convenient setting.
I have read three scripts of Apocalypse Now. They are all very different. I have also read the heavily censored texts of the CIA in SEA 1960 to 1970. The CIA reports were written by a guy named Ahern I think (the CIA began to insert people in North Vietnam by swift boat in the early 60's). It came across to me that the people running the CIA were veterans of WW II and had learned almost nothing from the success and failures of the OSS during WW II. Also there is a more complete version of the movie out now with scenes that were not included with the original.
Seems to me that the director changed almost everything for dramatic effect and given the characters he had to work with.
It is interesting to see where the actors don't follow the script or the entire thing gets changed to protect the sensibilities of the audience. The playmate scene was completely changed. Gore is OK but sex still has to be mom and apple pie (shades of Thai Visa).
Terrorism is dealt with in Catch 22 also but in a more lighthearted way.
The "Catch-22" is that "anyone who wants to get out of combat duty, isn't really crazy. Hence, pilots who request a mental fitness evaluation are sane, and therefore must fly in combat. At the same time, if an evaluation is not requested by the pilot, he will never receive one (i.e. they can never be found "insane"), meaning he must also fly in combat.
I think the answer to the “murder or terrorism” lies in the Catch 22 idea. But it is too early early in the day for me to work it out. I only mention it so others may explain it to me because I am feeling mentally lazy right now.
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If I get a choice of table beside a dog or children then the dog will get me every time.
Dogs in restaurants are a no no. There is nothing worse than when you are settling down and enjoying a good meal, than to see a blood engorged grey tick slowly climbing up the wall.
The last time I checked seeing eye dogs were allowed in all restaurants in the US (by law).
Don't know about the rest of the world.
So your statement about dogs being a no no in restaurants is incorrect.
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Meeting For First Time
in General Topics
Even if you don't want a TRULY decent woman you have to earn her respect. It is surprising how many indecent women want respect too.