Prubangboy

I live how I want. No money worries, my bio age is a decade younger than my chrono-age. 

I'm currently in India, bound for Sri Lanka with one large suitcase. It has all of my possessions in it: 5 changes of clothes, a memory foam pillow, a backroller, good headphones, an iPad.

I'll book a nice condo in a day when I get back to Bangkok. I am free.

Quoting Saint Willie (Nelson):

The road's been rough and rocky, but I've finally got my feet back on the ground

And after taking several readings, I'm surprised to find my mind's still fairly sound.

I'm enjoying the conspiracy angle:

-The assassin knew exactly where he'd be and when he'd be there. (cross posted with the above).

-He was scheduled to testify about insider trading.

-An estranged wife with a lover.

I moved to Chiang Mai with my western wife two years ago and separated from her last year. The usual "we grew apart scenario", with a dose of "still friends" (friendly, rather than friends, would be more accurate).

Chiang Mai has a fair few western women like my wife who meet up for lunches at places like The FreeBird Cafe. They have all sworn off men and sex 100%, but still get a fair bit of attention.

An even OK-looking older western woman is still in demand among western expat men. My ex innocently put up a friends-request on Tinder. She got 60+ responses a day, all from western men, maybe one every other day from Thai women who wanted to practice English.

I moved to Bangkok and would prefer a western woman myself. Education, light kink, temperament all figure into my preference. I am 72, I figure I might be able to date down to 56.

No prospects on either Tinder or at Meetups. Most older western women are married, at least for the moment. A few drunken German women in Hua Hin and Pattaya would be my dating universe, all with age preferences set lower than 72. I'm talking about 9 candidates in three cities, who were all very picky when I contacted them.

I'm going to Chula University in Bangkok this January, and might meet someone (Thai) that way. Tinder Thai prospects north of 50 speak limited English, have close to zero in their profiles, beyond a lot of "take care of each other" blather. I don't want to go much younger, and judging by their age range preferences, 65 seems to be the hard cut off date for Thai women 45-52.

My thinking going forward is:

-De-emphasize romance in my life and enjoy other great stuff about being me

-Take a look at Chinese women living here (also consider a LD relationship in Singapore).

-Put minimal effort into my search since the odds are bad and just wait to see what turns up.

Coments welcome, partic if Bangkok-centric.

6 hours ago, GinBoy2 said:

 

 

But on balance I'd chose somewhere in Mexico.

Agreed. Took a peek, Mex City was more cosmopolitan and intellectual. Maybe 20% more than P-city.

Forget the name, but I went to expat place in the mountains. Very tiny, and not cheap.

Cameron Highlands is one medium length street with a dozen restaurants all serving the same thali meal. Good internet, tho.

Relatedly, I just left an upscale Yoga Retreat in Goa (Purple Valley) and the staff and managers had been there for years.

If you're a yoga person and get that gig, you only leave to go to another such place, where again, openings rarely occur. The Indian staff were also lifers.

Every two weeks, it's a different group and top teacher. Your life is yoga and waiting for Friday: Vegan Mexican Night at the buffet.

Purple Valley also has a branch in Tenerife and in the Goa off-season, they migrate there.

Mostly brits, a few South Americans. You need multiple languages.

Similarly, an eco-resort has a different set of strict requirements and the same low turnover. A lot of smart and dedicated people want to live in the jungle and are happy to take low wages. I stayed in one in S. Laos. A few whities there were working there just for meals. There'd be a line out the door to replace them if they leave.

Muslim-ness is a sliding scale so a fair few are datable. Plus plenty of non-M. I found Bangkok Tinder a dead end for educated women. In KL, I got a few nibbles.

Housing is about 20% more, but higher quality. You can't toss a rock without hitting a Thai food option. Def crazy-hot. 

It's classier, nicer Thailand with no sanuk. So ultimately a pass for me.

Only leftward women would ever have sex with me.

And let's face it, you too.

Go chase the Amish and see how far you get.

3 hours ago, georgegeorgia said:

 

 

Talking about HP sauce ,I noticed places like Cheap Charlie's in Pattaya don't have it on  the table anymore I had to ask for it !

 

 

I read here once of a brit restaurant owner who kept getting his HP sauce stolen off of the table by low lifes.

Death penalty? Sure. I hearted the guy above who noted the wastrels who fill half a plate with it.

What are the pro's and cons of retiring in Thailand?

I'm trying to save AI a little work.

I have to get better at spotting AI dross and not responding to it.

Problem: A lot of English posters here sound like AI in real life.

1 hour ago, cowellandrew said:

I would be worried if I had all these failed relationships!

 

If he had 5 year relationships and 4 of those years were good, maybe they weren't all that failed as relationships.

OP, you still sound a little depressed, and if you are a relationship kinda guy, do some real work (therapy, Co-Dependency work etc.) and get yourself some love.

My new motto post-marriage:

I'm on this earth for a good time. Not a long time.

Prob worth a look at the Wiki and Reddit for Co-dependency.

Short version: You hide out from fixing your own problems by endlessly fixing their's.

I've been in caretaking relationships my whole life. Now I'm alone. It's a downer, but I live for myself, I love myself. I feel your heavy sadness in your post. I am free of it today.

I won't do it again. And neither should you.

Short version: It's not "inevitable". It's you.

Post breakup, no longer caretaking, just living for myself -I'm living it right now.

22 hours ago, bkk6060 said:

 

Korat and Khon Kaen are some of the better places in the country to find a GF. Not tainted and sick in the head like Pattaya.

 

I thought all the women in Pattaya came from those places. How do they remain "untainted" when it's only a six hour drive away?

To come here and right off the bat move to the sticks with no personal connections or language skills must be a rare occurrence. 

Anyone here done it?

My private language teacher is beautiful in that cute Thai way and comes from Khorat. And we def chat a lot besides doing language-learning. But I def get that ultra-goodgirl, long courtship, blah in bed vibe. 

So give me a decadent fat whitie any day of the week, thanks.

Can't fault Pattaya if you want a cheap place with lots of western amenities, close to a beach.

If I were a beach person, I'd be there -as places like Ko Chang or even Phuket would be too small town for me.

If you're not a beach person, it's either Bangkok or Chiang Mai. Moving to a place like Khorat without a GF in tow seems like a guarantee of alcoholism

Did CM for two years and found it to also be a little too small town for me.

Living on soi 11 with an air purifier working full time is the happiest I've been to date. Plenty of meetups, tremendous food options, the BTS and metro are a godsend to get anywhere I'd want to go pretty fast.

As a former audiophile sucker, you'd have to be a bat to notice the so-called sound vibrations. 

Helpful hint: put mouse pads under the speakers to minimize vibrations. If you absolutely feel the need.

You can also get little cones to elevate the speakers so that air can pass beneath them to make the bass sound "tighter". This too is imaginary.

I did a blind test of sterling silver speaker wires and lamp cord from the hardware store. The lamp cord won by a mile.

Moved to Bangkok, have been meeting older white women at meetups. It's my preferred flavor. If they're big in the can, I can live with that. 

Been back to my condo twice in two weeks with two reasonable candidates. No PIV, just fooling around.

One I might see again, one was leaving town. Fear of herpes is huge with them, and given the whoremongering proclivities I see here, very understandable.

So to her, I'm NOT a loser. To everyone here on this board, I def am.

I can live with that too. 

9 hours ago, Etaoin Shrdlu said:

 

I received a letter while in grad school inviting me to seek an interview with the CIA. I did not pursue it.

During my CIA interview, you had to apply; they weren't inviting anyone.

I got a callback based on a lot of knowledge I had about the Caribbean.

Not to give conservatives here a coronary, but clearly a black or hispanic candidate would have been a better fit.

Also, for a solo person, it's pretty hard not to fall into a few conversations a day here.

Just moved from Chiang Mai to Suk, Soi 11.

Can't fault it; it's like living in a very chill version of Times Square. Tremendous restaurant selection.

AnotherFarang said that Bangkok IS Thailand. I agree.

To get an "old fashioned" woman, it would help to be a truly old fashioned guy.

Are these men for instance, orthodox religious? Do they live in intergenerational households or excessively care for their parents?

Unhappiness with Sheila-slappers does not necessarily make you old fashioned.

I interviewed for the CIA in grad school (obv. an upper tier school).

A battery of psych tests, like the OP would love, and then an hour-long interrogation by two HR types. 

Got called back for a second interview, then nothing. I didn't have a foreign language and I was a bit on the old side.

On 9/9/2024 at 7:47 AM, RSD1 said:

 

Have you ever joined any MeetUp groups? 

Yeah, I had a Malaysian meal in Ekami on Sunday. About 2 thirds women, half Chinese and half Thai.  

Most of the women are looking at these events and most of the men are not.

2 hours ago, sidjameson said:

 

Known many men who are a 5 thinking they're an 7, looking for what they believe to be an 8

 

-when statically speaking, lining every women in the country up end to end she's a 9.5

 

Fair play tho, I did shoot a woman from the meetup a Line and we're going out to dinner.

A lot of my fellow oldies were very weak on approaching. If a woman was talking to another man, they were incapable of politely inserting themselves into the conversation.

So my old age sex advice would be to take your shot, if a woman laughs a bit and it's plausible that she might go out with you.

Chris;s bleak, brutally honest reflections are gold to me. What will you do differently?