You need to get that woman away from the family (maybe). I took my wife away from the village...to the US where we resided (among other places) until we returned to live here in Thailand. My wife got jobs and I made it clear that whatever money she earned was hers to do whatever she wanted. She sent some to her family occassionally, but mostly she fed her own wants and saved the rest. Upon our return to Thailand to live, she spent most of her savings and some of mine on building our first house here. Mind you she always worked and now receives a monthly check. I also give her some of mine, but I take care of us and the household, she is free to do whatever she wants with hers. We (meaning me) have never had a problem... Get out of dodge man. If she come with you, she'll love you for it. And she isn't working, then shame on you!