Gazza

His auto-mechanic cousin......Car Gogh.

His other auto-mechanic cousin.......Van Gogh.

His half Thai/Spanish airline pilot cousin....... Juan to Gogh (0ne-2-Go)

His family's tropical island retreat...... Gogh Samui.

His impatient cousin........ Les Gogh

His flatulent cousin.......... Let Gogh

His cousin who works in a superstore........ Tess Gogh

His Thai cartoon character cousin......Hugh Gogh.

Huh, when I was younger nobody wanted to play with me.

Now that I'm older, nobody wants to even fight with me.

OP, where exactly will you be venturing from to explore backroads?

Riding from say, BKK or Pattaya, to remote locations elsewhere in Thailand would require more safety wear than if you were perhaps just exploring the backroads in the vicinity of a village home.

I'm playing Silent Hill - The Room for PS2

I played that one a few months back.

Do you know what to do with the candles?

How come nearly all the 'Classics' are from the BBC?

ITV had the likes of Benny Hill and ermmm......errrr.....have I just answered my own question?

My PS2 is kaput so I'm waiting for PS3 to come out.

Dusted off the ancient(?) grey PS1 console and recently finished Final Fantasy 7.

Very near to finishing Alundra, again. It's got some of the most mind-bending puzzles I've ever come across in a game.

Next, I'll be starting on Alundra 2, I think I'm gonna be stuck on what to play after that.

Edit: Just remembered. Saw 'Tenchu Kurenai' for the PS1 today so will give that a go soon. The PS2 version was great.

His Spanish cousin.... Day Gogh.

His auto-mechanic cousin......Car Gogh.

His slow-witted French cousin.......Escar-Gogh.

have you ever mistaken a 100 baht note with a 500 baht note?  I have.

...maybe they are trying to remedy this problem.

sounds like progress to me.

In poor lighting I tend to have to double check that I'm not handing over a 'purple' instead of a 'reddy'.

I hope the new notes are Dayglo Orange.

I remember the times trying to get to my village called Don Nang Hong by songtaew.

Songtaew Driver: Pai Sai?

Gazza: Don Nang Hong.

S. Driver: Huh!!?

Gazza: Don Nang Hawng (trying a different pronounciation)

S. Driver: Nakhon Phanom?

Gazza: Mai. Dawn Naang Hong

S. Driver: That Phanom?

Gazza: Maaaiii. (sighs) Dawn Naang Hawng.

S. Driver: Ban Khwang?

Gazza: NO! (pulse quickening) Don NANG HONG.

S. Driver: Aw Hawww. Mai Ruu......Renu Nakhon?

Gazza: NOOOO!!! (temperature rising) DON NANG HONG!!!

S. Driver calls fellow songtaew driver over for assistance. Repeat conversation as above. While conversation is being repeated Gazza listens intently for the sound of a one baht coin dropping.

Then the coin drops.

S. Driver "Awww Hawwww! Don Nang Hong baw??"

Gazza: Ugh! (Loa for 'Yes')

Gazza arrives at the tambon of Don Nang Hong and approaches mc stand.

MC Taxi Driver: Pai Sai?

Gazza: Muubaan Koksawang.

MC Taxi Driver: Huh!????........

For the times that I hit on the right pronounciation they then assumed that I could speak fluent Thai or Lao and would throw a question at me.

Then it was my turn to say 'Huh!!???'

Back in England I'd ridden bikes for about 12 years on and off, mostly on. All bikes were Triumphs and Harleys and only ever got one puncture.

By 'riding habits', I mean that by having to ride in the left hand lane all the time as smaller bikes have to do here, it thereby increases the odds of picking up debris. So I suppose this also incorporates the environment issue.

Also, not many people realise that inner tubes do suffer ocassionally from rubbing against the tyre walls and rims. I've also noticed alot of rotting of the tube near the valve when replacing my tyres. So this may possibly explain why some flats don't have any outside visible evidence of puncturing ie. nails, glass etc.

When I used to drive a motorbike, flats were pretty common.  But every single flat was due to a foreign object being embedded in it, nail, glass, etc.  Still would seem the tire should take some of these objects better.

I'll bet that most, if not all, of the flats were mostly in the rear tyre too.

Flats....... I personally think it's partly related to the size of the bike. The bigger the bike, the bigger and thicker the tyre usually is. Also, riding bigger bikes usually means not having to ride so much in the left hand lanes all the time where alot of the debris is.

I've only ever suffered two flats in Thailand. One up in Nakhon Phanom while riding a small Yamaha 2 stroke along a narrow road and one flat on a Harley about 3 years ago when I parked next to a wood and corrugate sheet constructed spirit house where I picked up a dropped 3 inch nail.

I've been riding almost daily for the last 6 years and 8-9 years off and on prior to that.

So I figure with flats, it's to do with riding habits and tyre sizes.

I liked the Two Ronnies and RB in particular.

Others were; Steptoe & Son, Up Pompeii, Till Death Do Us Part, Q, Michael Palin's Ripling Yarns(?), Pete and Dudley (Not Only But Also(?)), The Worker, Citizen Smith, probably many more that I can't think of at the moment.

I never used to like the 'Carry On' films when I was a kid but wouldn't mind watching them now if only just to see some, or perhaps most, of the now departed Brit comedians.

Thanks for all the laughs guys past and present.

Credit also to the oft unsung heroes of BritCom, the scriptwriters.

I was reading my emails and found one email containing the following passage. I read it with almost 99% accuracy (i.e. didnt even think about the spelling). What is ur opinion about this?

---------------- STARTS HERE ---------------------------------

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy,

it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are,

the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer

be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and

you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae

the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef,

but the wrod as a wlohe.

---------------- ENDS HERE --------------------------------------

semes as thuogh cmabrdige uni is wrtie

wrtie? You mispelt it. It should be 'rghit'.

Plus she is staying in some apartment in Lard Prao which is not even that expensive; and she could easily probably have got free gym at Cali fitness or even a decent gym using her title.

I met her yesterday, and she is honestly a slight minor head turner, but aboslutey not special at all..... I liked at least 3-4 other contestants well more than her...

nuff said. she is a moron.

Hmmm....

Definitely seems to be a credibility issue here. You "say" you met her on October 1st, but the newspapers interviewed her at the Bangkok airport when she left Thailand for Australia on September 28th. Certainly can't imagine she would return so quickly given all the turmoil she's in, especially to return to "some apartment in Lat Prao."

stevero, you've got to get up real early in the morning to get one over on Sriracha 'Eagles Eyes' John.

C'mon guys, show a little sympathy.

What's so funny about an elephant cashing in his chips in Vegas?

Excellent comment. You said it with a poker face too.

She'd have lived longer if she'd played her cards right, tusk me.

Tusk, tusk, No need to be like that.

Ivory sorry. I not make anymore with the bad jokes same same this. Jing Jing.

I have no idea where you might get one in BKK but a bird of prey decoy seems to do the trick.

For those who have single family, one or two story dwellings, a cat like mine might help. Scares off unwanted guests too.

When standing at my driveway gate to my castlette (read townhouse) having a ciggie, I used to regularly see rats scuttling from cover to cover in the soi.

Until one of the neighbours got a cat. I've never seen a rat since.

Ref bird decoys.

I've seen street vendors selling those plastic wind-up toys, the kind that you wind-up an elastic band then let it go and it flaps it's wings for a short length of time.

The plastic fabric is usually clear with a printed picture of an eagle on it.

Maybe worth a try to purchase one of these and just hang it up and let it dangle in the breeze.

C'mon guys, show a little sympathy.

What's so funny about an elephant cashing in his chips in Vegas?

Ben Dover

Hope not. I'll really miss marching on the spot singing along to "Chitlada, Chitlada, Chitlada".

Oh No! the songs stuck in my head again.

I was told that I had read somewhere that a friend of mine said, "Be careful at the PB as the bathroom floor tiles are d@mned slippy when wet. It's very, very easy to slip and crack your head open."

Odds are much higher that you and/or your family will be killed in a senseless traffic accident than killed by any terrorist threat.

So are you going to run away to somewhere where they drive more sensibly? Of course not, so why run away because of a very small threat from terrorists?

Who said anything about running away?

Until it's known what and where the targets would be, the frequency and severity of the attacks, methods etc., then I can't say what I'd do or even say how it would affect my children.

Saying 'I would do this' or 'I would do that' is one thing, but, until something actually happens...I can not honestly say what I would do.

Just pronounce it the same as the Thais, as in:

'Free Cheese to a new beeyah......Hip hip hooray....'

I think I read somewhere that said that any of the places run by the Kings Group were ok. No scams or anything.

I think I also read somewhere that the 'Fire Cat Club' on Patpong 1 had a few extra special acts as well as the usual ping pong, goldfish, banana, hot drippy wax acts etc.

I read that even though it was a bit of a dive, it gave one a feeling of stepping back 10-20 years in time. I did read too that there had been a few reports of scamming although a friend of mine never had a problem there.

Oh, and if I remember correctly, I think I remember reading that the girls were 'bloody ugly' as well. Especially #27, Nit from Khon Kaen.

I can't honestly say what I'd do until something actually does happen. It would depend on how badly it affects my family. They would be my main concern.

This reminds me of the predictions some years back of a huge meteor would either collide with the Earth in the month of September (I think that was the month), or come close enough to destroy most of life on the planet, if not all of it. The world would be plagued by volcanoes and by earthquakes and by strong winds and by floods and by famine. And the oceans would rise up at great heights to consume the land.

Behold, all had been foretold so long ago by Nostrodamos and the writings of many other undeniable sources. Various signs and wonders both on the Earth and in the heavens indicated this thing was surely to happen exactly as foretold. Yea verily, then would come the end of the world!

The doomsday sayers busied themselves making videos and writing books about it to warn the masses what would soon befall upon them, for a nominal price of course.

The month came and went, as did the rest of the year and all the years that followed. But there was nary so much as a twinkle of the doomsday rock in the sky. And lo, the Earth revolved around the Sun, as it had done so many times before and continues to do to this very day. The doomsday sages were neither humbled nor discouraged by this, but climbed into their expensive chariots and returned to their luxurious mansions, counting the riches and thankful for the windfall that had fattened their purses by the gullible and the poor.

Evidently the doomsday sayers must have made a slight miscalculation of the prophecies and are now carefully replotting the charts and awaiting new signs and revelations.

When is the second coming coming ? 

Send me $19.99 (special price for a very limited time only) and I'll tell you.

Sorry, no refunds.