ballpoint

Massive fire and multiple explosions at a Russian army base in Crimea. Also reports that Russia is directly attacking Odesa, targeting grain shipping facilities on the waterfront following Ukraine's comments that it would continue with grain shipments despite Russia unilaterally ending the deal. Once again showing their true colours.

Put it on ice. I'm sure you'll get it later.

You should retract that comment.

No need to put the knife in.

Sounds like a bad Korea move if he was looking at advancing in the army. I'll get my tunic.

Breaking news: In response to Iran preparing a new load of drones for Russian use in Ukraine... ...the US re-provisions a battalion of heavy armour as a counter move.

I was there remonstrating the locals. That's another fine mess you got us into, Stanley.

I already told you. The other's in a beer bottle.

It was "hanging from a barbed wire fence in Goose Green" back in my day.

What has the country come to when a person can't make racist or antisemitic comments without being accused of being a racist antisemite? Let's get back to the good old days when the president himself could openly preach bigotry and racism and be cheered for doing so!

True, you can Google it.