ballpoint

Who believes in telekinesis? Raise my hand!

My wife has just told me that I don't know how to shave properly... Bloody cheek!

I'm extremely passionate about preserving endangered animals. You should taste my panda jam or rhino chutney.

I can proove to you that I'm psikick. Right now you're thinking, "He can't spell."

I took my cat to the vet and explained she was very listless and not moving. The vet put a stethoscope to her chest and said “Say aaah” “She can’t say aaah!” I said. “I wasn’t talking to the cat", he replied, "I was talking to you. The cat’s dead”

One of the prosecution witnesses gave testimony on papers from 2011, but a New York appellate court has ruled that only allegations from 2014 onwards can be used as evidence. The judge warned the witness about this, saying it was a waste of time to present papers from then, unless they could be related to later events. When Trump exited the court he jumped on this and came up with the "80% of charges have been vacated" line himself, even though no one else saw it that way. The MAGA brigade are getting excited over another piece of Trump fiction. Some of the MAGA sites and YouTube channels are reporting it, but not many. Some of the (to them serious) comments made as they get their hopes up are hilarious, but rather than encourage views on them I'll just link to this Daily Mail report on it: "Trump makes wild claim that 80% of fraud case could be THROWN OUT because statute of limitations has expired: President gives thumbs up in court - as judge slams prosecutors for a 'waste of time' for having accountants testify" https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-12586351/Trump-makes-wild-claim-80-fraud-case-THROWN-statute-limitations-expired-President-gives-thumbs-court-judge-slams-prosecutors-waste-time-having-accountants-testify.html

It sounds like an old TIN, which did have 10 numbers. They have 13 now.

Brian Cox discusses this very question, and gives a number of possible reasons as to why alien life has yet to be discovered (if ever). His personal favourite of them rather contradicts the OP, but, as he says, he'd be delighted to be proven wrong. Because that's what science is all about. (The link works, it just doesn't play in its own window). Why haven’t we found aliens? A physicist shares the most popular theories. | Brian Cox

There must be a lot of English speaking Thais out there if foreigners aren't allowed to sign up for PTT's EV Station PluZ:

Non Charoen is in Ban Kruat district, further south of Prakhonchai. There are a few Thai style resorts around there, and a few more in Ban Kruat town, but the best hotels in that area are in Prakhonchai, with the de l'amour (the THB 1,504 a night one on the map below) being arguably the best, (and most expensive). Good luck, I hope all goes well for you and your daughter. Hotel de l'amour – โรงแรมเดอลามูร์ (hotel-delamour.com)

Not the Green Mango owner?

Exactly. I have the same problem with an Australian bank. They can send me warning SMS's for some things - such as when I recently chose a PIN for my new debit card, a message arrived telling me that it had been changed, but I can't receive OTPs from them. When I contacted them they advised me to get an Australian SIM.

Not a joke, but amusing none the less.

The headline is correct. Trump's scam is getting blasted.

How many roads must a man walk down? Life, the universe and everything.

Instead of a swear jar, I have a negativity jar. Every time I have pessimistic thoughts I put £1 in. It’s currently half empty

As we left the restaurant, she kissed me and said, "We should have dinner again." "No thanks," I replied, "I'm full."

When my wife walked in from work I passed her a huge bunch of flowers. She dropped her bag, gave me a huge cuddle, kissed me and told me she loved me. "I love you too but could you take them next door. They were delivered earlier but she wasn't in."