Understanding Thai Ladies

[SOTIRIOS]

...sadly...that was the plan from the beginning...or some variation...

 

...they can be very patient...they have nothing to lose...and everything to gain...

 

 

[TumblinDice]

Seems to me that from all the experiences heard & read about, that Thai woman have a hidden agenda & they wait it out to take advantage. Their family will always come first no matter what.

I doubt one single attached Thai woman truly loves her farang man. He is just a meal ticket to them. Especially for the less educated, co-dependent of them. Without a farang, they are nothing.

Unless that woman has lived overseas & experienced a responsible working life in the west, she is nothing but a blood sucking leach.

[pgrahmm]

47 minutes ago, Tofer said:

Depends on the structure of the house, if on stilts / post & pad foundations it could be detached and moved on. I think the USA are big into this, I recall a programme 'monster moves' or similar, wherein the house is loaded on a trailer and relocated to a new plot.

 

However!!! - in a small village I think it would not go unnoticed....

 

Lots of advice on here so far to pack up quietly and move on, probably best to follow that.

Doesn't work on brick or block & mortar/slab structures.....Only wood framed wooden houses can be picked up & moved.....

 

Most of those are very old, solidly built structures - not today's crappy builds....

[cookieqw]

There’s none so blind as those that cannot see 

[rumak]

Well....Mr Igetby...... you have now read seven pages of response.    What is the verdict ?

[neeray]

6 hours ago, 4MyEgo said:

If there is no physical contact, like a smile and a hug with a kiss first thing in the morning to start your day, I would say your relationship is burnt toast, perhaps time to move on as it cannot be a one way street so to speak.

 

Sounds to me like she got what she wanted and has probably fallen out of love with you and wanting you to move on, like another poster said, take a holiday to where you are on familiar ground, see if she calls you, misses, you, and then you can decide what you want, i.e. if she doesn't call you often, doesn't say she misses you, then time for you to move on.

 

Time heals everything, some people have trouble expressing their real thoughts, like my x back in the land of Oz, she fell out of love with me years earlier, I experienced what your going through, hanging on is not the way to go, best thing I ever did was moved on, repartnered and have found love again, but a much better quality love, much younger too, with a bubbly personality that keeps me feeling younger, mood swings, never !!!

Above seems like pretty good, experienced-based advice. Here's another thought. Take that holiday that many posters have suggested. Thais don't like losing face! Imagine how much face she'll lose when you disappear and she can't give the village an answer as to when you will return. Maybe that will knock some sense and respect into her. Maybe she'll contact you and be willing to rekindle the affection and everything else that has gone missing.

I wish you the best of luck.

[smotherb]

On 8/5/2018 at 9:54 AM, baansgr said:

Yes but she isnt going to want to sell the house in her village so owning 50% is a moot point

 

I have a friend who was in a similar situation. The wife even admitted 50% of the house was his. However, miraculously, no one ever made an offer for the house in this little village. Finally,  the husband was really tired of it and accepted an offer from a Thai man of maybe 20% of the house's value. The farang was devastated, but after 5 or 6 years of waiting agreed to the sale, took his money, and left. Will wonders never cease; the wife still lives in the house.  Draw your own conclusions. 

[bamukloy]

I see only a few options here:

leave

or

grow a pair..learn Thai and embarrass her (in Thai) in front of her friends (and family)

and dont be shy in reminding them..WHO pays the bills.

actually you must ask them that constantly.

who pays the bills <deleted>?

they will change nearly instantly.

 

The thing i found here, up-country people are not that worldly..nor do they really have a lot of smarts.

threatening to <deleted> off (therefor loosing the cash cow) occasionally doesnt hurt.

leaving every now and then is even better.

they havent got the smarts to replace you and are probably to lazy to do so.

I have said here a few times and been crucified for it...

but its a matter of training them to your way of thinking.

 

again i will remind you..grow a set..it is YOU who is paying the bills!

they will realise their place very quickly

[neeray]

1 hour ago, TumblinDice said:

Seems to me that from all the experiences heard & read about, that Thai woman have a hidden agenda & they wait it out to take advantage. Their family will always come first no matter what.

I doubt one single attached Thai woman truly loves her farang man. He is just a meal ticket to them. Especially for the less educated, co-dependent of them. Without a farang, they are nothing.

Unless that woman has lived overseas & experienced a responsible working life in the west, she is nothing but a blood sucking leach.

You speak with a very dirty mouth and paint with a broad brush.

Keep reading TVF and you will read of some successful unions in addition to the bad ones.

As for your last sentence, I personally would not want a Thai woman who has "lived overseas". She would have been westernized and be just like all the ones that we moved to Thailand to get away from.

I'm sorry for you that you've made such poor choices in Thailand that cause you to write hogwash like this.

Apparently your "tumblindice" don't tumble too well.

[TumblinDice]

22 minutes ago, neeray said:

You speak with a very dirty mouth and paint with a broad brush.

Keep reading TVF and you will read of some successful unions in addition to the bad ones.

As for your last sentence, I personally would not want a Thai woman who has "lived overseas". She would have been westernized and be just like all the ones that we moved to Thailand to get away from.

I'm sorry for you that you've made such poor choices in Thailand that cause you to write hogwash like this.

Apparently your "tumblindice" don't tumble too well.

Dirty mouth? What are you, a pastor?

And a western women probably would have nothing to do with you which would explain why you choose Thailand. Easy pickens for an old fool once he opens his wallet. BTW, whats the age difference between you & your woman?

At least (most) western women will legally be held accountable for their actions in a relationship. 

I've had relationships with Thai women both in the west & Thailand. I'd prefer the westernized Thai, "they get it"& its not always about money.

And yes, my dice hasn't tumbled well in LOS, so I packed up & left. Had enough of that all around, everywhere BS, especially freedom of speech! I finally learned my lesson & Thai women are no longer on my desirable list. They're not trustworthy enough.  

You can have the fake smiles, insincerity & stabs in the back. You'll still never be #1 in their minds. You're the giver & she will always be the taker. I hope you will learn Thai language so you can understand their conversations as they're ridiculing you & making plans to screw you over.

I'll take my retirement to South America & roll my dice there. Its closer to home for me anyways & the women are smokin hot! They look fantastic on the beaches & they can swim! I won't have to worry about her drowning after a flood!

 

[whaleboneman]

On 8/5/2018 at 12:32 AM, NCC1701A said:

A good way to know if you are delusional about your relationship is to take a photo of yourself and your girlfriend standing together side by side.   

 

look at the photo and ask yourself how realistic would it be for you to be having this same experience in the west?

 

 

 

That's really not fair...we're not all handsome like you.

[whaleboneman]

On 8/5/2018 at 4:41 AM, grollies said:

Stop being a doormat and man-up.

 

Next time she disrespects you in public give her a massive mouthful right back infront of everyone, make sure she looses loads of face.

 

Put your bloody foot down and stop being a victim.

 

Tell her you want to get married, when she says 'no' reply: not to you.

 

Pack your stuff one day, clear bank accounts, etc then when she goes out one day torch the house and bugger off.

Did he build her a teak house?

[neeray]

4 minutes ago, TumblinDice said:

Dirty mouth? What are you, a pastor?

And a western women probably would have nothing to do with you which would explain why you choose Thailand. Easy pickens for an old fool once he opens his wallet. BTW, whats the age difference between you & your woman?

At least (most) western women will legally be held accountable for their actions in a relationship. 

I've had relationships with Thai women both in the west & Thailand. I'd prefer the westernized Thai, "they get it"& its not always about money.

And yes, my dice hasn't tumbled well in LOS, so I packed up & left. Had enough of that all around, everywhere BS, especially freedom of speech! I finally learned my lesson & Thai women are no longer on my desirable list. They're not trustworthy enough.  

You can have the fake smiles, insincerity & stabs in the back. You'll still never be #1 in their minds. You're the giver & she will always be the taker. I hope you will learn Thai language so you can understand their conversations as they're ridiculing you & making plans to screw you over.

I'll take my retirement to South America & roll my dice there. Its closer to home for me anyways & the women are smokin hot! They look fantastic on the beaches & they can swim! I won't have to worry about her drowning after a flood!

 

I wish you great happiness in South America.

[bamukloy]

10 minutes ago, whaleboneman said:

That's really not fair...we're not all handsome like you.

But he does have a point.

Just if you visited Pattaya, Bkk, Nana, Patpong, Silom etc and see the ugly loser guys that these girls must suffer...

Even if you lost a house before, it actually make you sorry for them!

[TumblinDice]

13 minutes ago, neeray said:

I wish you great happiness in South America.

Thanks mate & same to you

[whaleboneman]

7 hours ago, moutamine said:

Burn the house down and move on friend! Why should she enjoy it with other men while you have to find another place to live?  

Make a example for the other Thai "ladies" of what happens you take a farang for a ride!!

Yes. Good lesson. Farang get angry and burn house. Farang go to jail longtime. 

When I realized that my relationship wasn't working, I left. House, car and motorbike. No hard feelings. I did love her and was happy to provide her with everything.

Now I'm looking for a new lady that lives at the beach. Don't want to build another house upcountry. I like to be by the sea.

Just a Canadian guy building houses in SEA one lady at a time.

[whaleboneman]

2 hours ago, bamukloy said:

I see only a few options here:

leave

or

grow a pair..learn Thai and embarrass her (in Thai) in front of her friends (and family)

and dont be shy in reminding them..WHO pays the bills.

actually you must ask them that constantly.

who pays the bills Fบckers?

they will change nearly instantly.

 

The thing i found here, up-country people are not that worldly..nor do they really have a lot of smarts.

threatening to piรร off (therefor loosing the cash cow) occasionally doesnt hurt.

leaving every now and then is even better.

they havent got the smarts to replace you and are probably to lazy to do so.

I have said here a few times and been crucified for it...

but its a matter of training them to your way of thinking.

 

again i will remind you..grow a set..it is YOU who is paying the bills!

they will realise their place very quickly

I love your spelling.

[bamukloy]

6 minutes ago, whaleboneman said:

Yes. Good lesson. Farang get angry and burn house. Farang go to jail longtime. 

When I realized that my relationship wasn't working, I left. House, car and motorbike. No hard feelings. I did love her and was happy to provide her with everything.

Now I'm looking for a new lady that lives at the beach. Don't want to build another house upcountry. I like to be by the sea.

Just a Canadian guy building houses in SEA one lady at a time.

lol. Trouble is, "by the sea" is only gonna get you another lady who is more likely to be only there to profit from the farang...

the same, or probably worse than what you had before.

[bamukloy]

5 minutes ago, whaleboneman said:

I love your spelling.

Thanks. English is not my first language.

I made an extra effort for this but sometimes i get the help of my son. 

[neeray]

1 minute ago, bamukloy said:

Thanks. English is not my first language.

I made an extra effort for this but sometimes i get the help of my son. 

You're doing okay (spelling). I have seen much worse on here.

Keep participating.

[whaleboneman]

6 minutes ago, bamukloy said:

Thanks. English is not my first language.

I made an extra effort for this but sometimes i get the help of my son. 

I wasn't being sarcastic (unusual for me). I like your creative use of thai script.

[whaleboneman]

10 minutes ago, bamukloy said:

lol. Trouble is, "by the sea" is only gonna get you another lady who is more likely to be only there to profit from the farang...

the same, or probably worse than what you had before.

I had a wonderful relationship for four years with this lady. And I really enjoyed building the house and furnishing it. I even painted it myself. It was an incredible adventure and we also traveled all over SEA together. But in the end I realized that our relationship wasn't going anywhere and left.

Now I've met a Pinay lady so I guess I'm going to learn about house building in the Philippines next. Life can always be an adventure if you want.

[MyFriend You]

On 8/5/2018 at 6:24 AM, rumak said:

Easy Solution !!!!     move on.     Make same mistake again .

and have fun doing it...............

[Skypirate]

After several short and long term interracial relationships, Ive come to a accept a reasoning in  the asian-farang relationship that I can accept.

 

1.  Unlike the traditional Western and Euro relationships, you are not the the "Top-Dog".  Even though your bank account is.  Never disclose your pre-realtionship finances.  Make them plan financially on the new monthly financial plan.

2.  Mom and Dad rule the roost.  The Asian family is structured that way.

3.  Asian relatives love you because they can leach off you.

4.  Lying to you is only wrong if you front them on it and then U are the one that is wrong.

5. NEVER, EVER, NEVER, EVER buy them a home that you will never own.   NEVER do this.  You can front the deposit or down funding.   Have them set up a long term loan and let your monthly payment be the marriage bond.    Same with a vehicle.

If they truly love you, everything works out.  If not, then they need to figure out how to pay for everything without you.

6 .Dont ever think you are on top of the food chain in an Asian relationship.   Happily married or not.

 

BOTTOM LINE here, you're going to loose the house.   Take all the furniture and indoor furnishings away.  If she is going to scam u out of the house, then let her live in squalor.  Drain the Bank account before she can.  Make her come to you and beg for bht.

 

Her having a home is a success in her community , marrying a farang is not.   There are happy, long term Asia-Farang relationships.  I have finally found one, (I think, 5555) however....never give the gal full rein.  Treat her like a lady, don't screw around on her....but never completely turn your back on her.

 

Sin Sod...get a written contract from her folks about her virginity, expectations and sincerity, as well as an exit plan if things turn sour.   After all, you are buying her with the intent for a long term relationship.  It's their game, not your's.  So play by their rules, but protect yourself.

[TumblinDice]

Just now, TunnelRat69 said:

and have fun doing it...............

But take the lesson learned with you & don't repeat the same mistake.

 

[neeray]

6 minutes ago, whaleboneman said:

I had a wonderful relationship for four years with this lady. And I really enjoyed building the house and furnishing it. I even painted it myself. It was an incredible adventure and we also traveled all over SEA together. But in the end I realized that our relationship wasn't going anywhere and left.

Now I've met a Pinay lady so I guess I'm going to learn about house building in the Philippines next. Life can always be an adventure if you want.

I have a friend in Canada who had (had = past tense) a friend who married a Pinay. She talked him into selling his house in Canada and building in Ph. They built the house in her name, shared his cash and then suddenly friends and family back home would message and call and receive no communications back. Go figure!

That was 5 years ago. But I imagine the flower gardens are growing well.

[user343434]

same old story since years..

Mine id different, mine works in a Restaurant and as soon out of sight she will be found hot dressed in hip waving in Insomnia walking street.

 

I guess its about 60% the story Love, new mobile phone, scooter for father, buffalo surgery and Grandma's bad sh*t... 

and when all has been paid the test drill in the wallet is over...

...and the serious love story starts, a car or even a house? 

then she turns over into a sexual dead zombie just to get rid of you...

 

14 years ago I bumped into a girl in Isaan working on a rice field, didn't speak English and as we came together:

No I do NOT want a house, No just put the money on YOUR Bank account and put the household money incl rent on mine.

 

5 years ago I heard a wimping from the bedroom and as I asked whats wrong, she replied with her open bank book on her chest.

You have learned me so much, also what 1Mil baht is in Numbers on the calculator.

But, How does it look like, is it a table or a room full?

I replied "why you ask me?"

"because I have been by the bank since a long time to print my Bank Book with the household money, and the bank gave me so much extra that it is now over one Million.."

 

She might be one of the 40% but she was not found in walking street or even in a restaurant in Jomtien..  

She is my little Farmer's girl, loves singing in her garden, is stunned what you can teach a dog if you care, almost never goes out

and shopping ends up in looking for a Magazine, checking for a dress not more than 300 baht and working one week sewing on it until the style of the one in the Magazine is copied.

When I am asking for what occasion she will wear it the answer is mostly .. when my sister comes I will show her I can.. 

 

If I would be you I would have said good bye already and taking the next 40% chance finding the right one.. there are lots out there, not all Thai Girls are bad.. 

 

[Skypirate]

Really great read and spot on.  "The Predatory Female".

[likeke]

RUN FOREST RUN!!!!!

[TumblinDice]

8 minutes ago, Skypirate said:

Really great read and spot on.  "The Predatory Female".

A quote from the book...

When you begin to fraternize with a woman, you are taking the first steps in a ritual mating dance that, if allowed to progress, will result in your moving about the floor in a semi-comatose state until you are fleeced of your money, property, and peace of mind. A predatory female will study you. She learns to know what you are thinking. She begins the strongest primeval death grip known to man.