Facial structures of Farang expats

[RamenRaven]

(First off, please take this as comedy.

Photos are from Wikimedia Commons.)

 

I don't know if it's just me, but I've been noticing that most of the Western expats married to local women in northern Thailand (Chiang Mai and surroundings) have heads that are shaped like squares and boxes. As a Farang with a long face shaped like an ice-cream cone, I feel out of place among the Farangs in Chiang Mai. Farangs in Japan and China don't tend to have box-like heads either, but in Thailand, that is the predominant facial structure you see.

 

Sounds like a joke, but I'm kind of being serious here. ???

 

The square/box-like Farangs would be like George HW Bush.

 

Or Robert Mueller.

 

Or Boxman (there's a whole YouTube series on Boxman by Smosh).

 

 

In Pattaya and other areas, you see lots of Farangs with egg-shaped heads. Like Alfred Hitchcock. Not so many boxes in Pattaya and Bangkok. Many are not married. Many are bald in a good way.

 

Or, Morpheus from the Matrix with his egg-like head.

 

Many backpackers and digital nomads have the long, ice-cream cone head look. Few married Farang expats in northern Thailand do. As a Farang with a long ice-cream cone face like this guy, I feel like I really stick out like a sore thumb among the square-faced Farangs. Never actually told them that, but that's how I feel.

 

Not me, but my head is shaped like this.

 

Has anyone noticed too? What could possibly explain this weird trend? Some theories I've thought up.

 

1. Fortunetellers telling Thai ladies to marry Farang men with box-like faces, since that means they'll have a big box full of Thai baht?

2. Predominantly older men of Germanic descent settling down with Thai women, whereas the rest are a hodgepodge of Southern and Eastern Europeans with longer or rounder faces?

3. Random coincidence due to humans noticing patterns where they don't exist?

4. Thai food causing heads to square out?

 

I don't mean to troll or offend anyone or look down on any Farangs with heads shaped like (or not shaped like) boxes. It's just an observation that I have. Please take this light-heartedly.

 

Cheers.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited September 4, 2018 by RamenRaven

[55Jay]

[Rc2702]

I reckon there's a lot of lads called Barry in thailand. Fat lads named Barry. 

Edited September 4, 2018 by Rc2702

[NCC1701A]

I have categories for grouping Farangs.

 

Goldfinger types

Santa Clause types

Retired High School science teacher types.

Vin Diesel types

David Beckham types.

 

Example of use: "I saw a Santa Clause today with his 22 year old wife."

 

I have other categories.

 

not sure about the shape of their heads.

 

[RamenRaven]

Not a bad classification.

 

Goldfinger types (quite a few box-head guys included)

 

Santa Clause types

 

Retired High School science teacher types (more like my box-head classification)

 

Vin Diesel types = my egg-head classification

 

David Beckham types = my ice cream cone-head classification (well, some of them)

[55Jay]

Fun topic for me the other night because it was so obscure and detailed to the point I thought, yeah, that dude's gotta be totally baked!  ?

 

Another version of OP's Finding Frankenstein spotting game is called Suss the Psycho;  objective being to name all the surgically modified bits in 5 seconds or less.

A score of 70% or better unlocks the next level ~ Ask the Esophagus.

 

Edited September 5, 2018 by 55Jay

[RamenRaven]

Thais often have trouble telling Farangs apart, thinking they all look the same.

 

This thread can serve as a nice introductory tutorial to helping them see how Farangs might differ from each other:

"How to tell Farangs apart 101"

 

Edited September 5, 2018 by RamenRaven