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Popular Post ravip Posted January 30, 2022 Popular Post Share Posted January 30, 2022 *ATTORNEY*: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning? *WITNESS* : Did you actually pass the law exam? ____________________ *ATTORNEY* : The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he? *WITNESS* : He's twenty, much like your IQ. ____________________ *ATTORNEY* : Were you present when your picture was taken? *WITNESS* : Are you serious. ____________________ *ATTORNEY*: She had three children, right? *WITNESS* : Yes. *ATTORNEY* : How many were boys? *WITNESS* : None. *ATTORNEY* : Were there any girls? *WITNESS* : Your Honour, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney? ____________________ *ATTORNEY* : How was your first marriage terminated? *WITNESS* : By death. *ATTORNEY* : And by whose death was it terminated? *WITNESS* : Take a guess. ____________________ *ATTORNEY* : Can you describe the individual? *WITNESS* : He was about medium height and had a beard. *ATTORNEY* : Was this a male or a female? *WITNESS* : Unless the Circus was in town, I'm going with male. ____________________ *ATTORNEY* : Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people? *WITNESS :* All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight. ____________________ *ATTORNEY*: Do you recall the time that you examined the body? *WITNESS* : The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m. *ATTORNEY* : And Mr. Denton was dead at the time? *WITNESS* : If not, he was by the time I finished. ____________________ *ATTORNEY*: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? *WITNESS* : No. *ATTORNEY* : Did you check for blood pressure? *WITNESS* : No. *ATTORNEY* : Did you check for breathing? *WITNESS* : No. *ATTORNEY* : So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy? *WITNESS* : No. *ATTORNEY* : How can you be so sure, Doctor? *WITNESS* : Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar. *ATTORNEY* : But could the patient have still been alive? *WITNESS*: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Crossy Posted January 31, 2022 Popular Post Share Posted January 31, 2022 Not new but ... Have you ever seen a twenty pound note all crumpled up?" asked the wife. "No," he said. She gave him a sexy little smile, slowly reached into her cleavage and pulled out a crumpled twenty pound note. "Have you ever seen a fifty pound note all crumpled up?" she asked. "No," he said. She gave him another sexy little smile, seductively reached into her knickers and pulled out a crumpled fifty pound note. "Now," she said, "have you ever seen 30,000 pounds all crumpled up?" "No," he said, intrigued. "Well, go and take a quick look in the garage." 1 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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Popular Post Crossy Posted January 31, 2022 Popular Post Share Posted January 31, 2022 22 hours ago, ballpoint said: And for those just too young ... 1 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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