3 Jokes

[Jamesyboi]

A few months after his parents were divorced, Little Johnny passed by his mom's bedroom and saw her rubbing her body and moaning, "I need a man, I need a man!"

Over the next couple of months, he saw her doing this several times.

One day, he came home from school and heard her moaning. When he peeked into her bedroom, he saw a man on top of her.

Little Johnny ran into his room, took off his clothes, threw himself on his bed, started stroking himself, and moaning, "Ohh, I need a bike! I need a bike!"

A travelling salesman is in West Virginia when he comes upon a house with a little boy sitting on the front steps.

"Son, is your mother home?" The little boy nods yes.

"Can I see her please?" The boy nods again, and they go around to the back of the house where they find the mother on the ground, humping away with a sheep.

"Son, do you see what your mother is doing?" The boy nods yes.

"Do you know what that is?" The boy nods.

"Doesn't that bother you?"

"Naaaaaaaaaaaah!"

Once again the female staff will be offering courses to men of all marital status. Class size will be limited to 10 as course material may prove difficult.

1. Combatting Stupidity 2. You Too Can Do Housework 3. P.M.S.-Learning When To Keep Your Mouth Shut 4. How To Refill An Ice Tray 5. How to Buy Appropriate Gifts 6. Understanding The Female Response To Coming In Drunk At 4 a.m. 7. How To Sort Laundry 8. Parenting - No, It Doesn't End With Conception 9. Cooking - There's More To It Than Microwave Burritos 10. How Not To Act Like An ###### When You're Obviously Wrong 11. Spelling - Even You Can Get It Right 12. Understanding Your Financial Incompetence 13. Men - The Weaker Sex 14. Good Reasons To Give Flowers 15. How To Stay Awake After Sex 16. Why It Is Unacceptable To Relieve Yourself Anywhere But The Bathroom 17. Garbage - Getting It To The Curb 18. Sex 101 - You Can Fall Asleep Without It If You Really Try and Sex 201 - The Morning Dilemma - If It's "Awake", Take A Shower 19. "Weekend" and "Sports" Are Not Synonyms 20. How To Put The Toilet Seat Down 21. How To Go Shopping With Your Mate And Not Get Lost 22. The Remote Control - Overcoming Your Dependency 23. Helpful Postural Hints For Couch Potatoes 24. How To Act Older Than Your Children 25. You, Too, Can Be A Designated Driver 26. No, You Really Don't Look Like Mel Gibson 27. Changing Underwear Made Easy 28. The Attainable Goal - Omitting "%" "#" and "&" From Your Vocabulary 29. Fluffing The Blankets After Farting Is Not Necessary 30. Realizing The Benefits Of Asking For Directions

[Crow Boy]

A few months after his parents were divorced, Little Johnny passed by his mom's bedroom and saw her rubbing her body and moaning, "I need a man, I need a man!"

Over the next couple of months, he saw her doing this several times.

One day, he came home from school and heard her moaning. When he peeked into her bedroom, he saw a man on top of her.

Little Johnny ran into his room, took off his clothes, threw himself on his bed, started stroking himself, and moaning, "Ohh, I need a bike! I need a bike!"

recycled

A travelling salesman is in West Virginia when he comes upon a house with a little boy sitting on the front steps.

"Son, is your mother home?" The little boy nods yes.

"Can I see her please?" The boy nods again, and they go around to the back of the house where they find the mother on the ground, humping away with a sheep.

"Son, do you see what your mother is doing?" The boy nods yes.

"Do you know what that is?" The boy nods.

"Doesn't that bother you?"

"Naaaaaaaaaaaah!"

recycled

Once again the female staff will be offering courses to men of all marital status. Class size will be limited to 10 as course material may prove difficult.

1. Combatting Stupidity 2. You Too Can Do Housework 3. P.M.S.-Learning When To Keep Your Mouth Shut 4. How To Refill An Ice Tray 5. How to Buy Appropriate Gifts 6. Understanding The Female Response To Coming In Drunk At 4 a.m. 7. How To Sort Laundry 8. Parenting - No, It Doesn't End With Conception 9. Cooking - There's More To It Than Microwave Burritos 10. How Not To Act Like An ###### When You're Obviously Wrong 11. Spelling - Even You Can Get It Right 12. Understanding Your Financial Incompetence 13. Men - The Weaker Sex 14. Good Reasons To Give Flowers 15. How To Stay Awake After Sex 16. Why It Is Unacceptable To Relieve Yourself Anywhere But The Bathroom 17. Garbage - Getting It To The Curb 18. Sex 101 - You Can Fall Asleep Without It If You Really Try and Sex 201 - The Morning Dilemma - If It's "Awake", Take A Shower 19. "Weekend" and "Sports" Are Not Synonyms 20. How To Put The Toilet Seat Down 21. How To Go Shopping With Your Mate And Not Get Lost 22. The Remote Control - Overcoming Your Dependency 23. Helpful Postural Hints For Couch Potatoes 24. How To Act Older Than Your Children 25. You, Too, Can Be A Designated Driver 26. No, You Really Don't Look Like Mel Gibson 27. Changing Underwear Made Easy 28. The Attainable Goal - Omitting "%" "#" and "&" From Your Vocabulary 29. Fluffing The Blankets After Farting Is Not Necessary 30. Realizing The Benefits Of Asking For Directions

I think this is a new one - good