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Blending in.

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Im a big believe that no matter where you go, there you are. However, Iv been feeling very alien in Chiang Mai. Im not trying to be Thai and I don't hang around any expats. I just try to be polite, tip well and mind my own business. But I don't feel welcome at all anymore. I realize most Thais are tried of us, but I'm on a 1 year ed visa and not going anywhere for a while. Im just wondering if some expats find it easier to blend in in Bangkok or even Pattaya, you know, amongst the hustle and bustle of a larger city?

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  • I prefer to avoid and or ignore them not  blend in with them  I feel it works better that way

  • tribalfusion001
    tribalfusion001

    I find sitting in a local Thai bar and chatting to the Thais is a good one way blend in. They let regulars have a tab, can sit in the bar after closing time, jump on motorcycle with a member of staff

  • BritManToo
    BritManToo

    I avoid everyone. Same as I avoided everyone when I lived in the UK.

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I prefer to avoid and or ignore them not  blend in with them 

I feel it works better that way

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life in general - not a problem. Forexample, i get on well with neighbours and have some thai friends. Same goes for thai family, The FIL is a miserable wotsit but my BIL is sound as a pound. 

 

Work in office - Im the only farang and am generally ingnored, but i do catch the odd barb in the white noise they call conversation. Im uncomfortable sometimes / rarely but not enough for it to be a problem to me. But, having said that, im a miserable wotsit in my own right at times.

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I find sitting in a local Thai bar and chatting to the Thais is a good one way blend in. They let regulars have a tab, can sit in the bar after closing time, jump on motorcycle with a member of staff to the nearest 7/11. The Thai couple who run my local bar even me took me to Suttisan police station last year when phone was stolen from my room. Never had a problem blending in, I'm not fluent in Thai, but I try to order what I want in Thai and if I make a mistake many times they help me out with pronounciation.

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''I'm a big believe that no matter where you go, there you are''

 

 

Erh, yea. Where else would you be??

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Ive never had a problem blending in here in Chiang Mai. I used to live in Bangkok for several years, I found it more difficult to mix there especially with the expats, some of them dont like to break there own little circle of freinds.

 

I have many expat mates here in CM, and even though most of them are alot older than me, this does not bother me at all. I only tend to mix with Thais when I am with my wife, this is because most of them ( not all ) are happy to sit with you just for a free night out etc. I dont and never will class the hangers on as mates.

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It takes a while to make friends anywhere you go is my experience no matter what country IMHO. 

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Interesting thread...begs the question:  Why would you want to stay in a place you are not wanted or welcomed?

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1 hour ago, racinkc1 said:

I'm just wondering if some expats find it easier to blend in in Bangkok or even Pattaya, you know, amongst the hustle and bustle of a larger city?

Ignore the locals apart from simple commerce, don't tip.

It's worked for me.

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46 minutes ago, YetAnother said:

the thais are a pretty shallow group; once you learn what thainess really means, at least to the level you need to, you will start avoiding thais and , likely, re-seekout the expat crowd

I avoid everyone.

Same as I avoided everyone when I lived in the UK.

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1 hour ago, racinkc1 said:

But I don't feel welcome at all anymore.

Right now I doubt if many do.

The virus is obviously mostly a western issue now.

Thais probably think you are a big part of the problem or sick.

So, I guess do not expect much from them for the time being.

 

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28 minutes ago, Puchaiyank said:

Interesting thread...begs the question:  Why would you want to stay in a place you are not wanted or welcomed?

Cost? girls? food? weather?  tons of reasons. I don't think I know of many Farang who find Thais very welcoming or polite. We are outsiders what can we expect?  it doesn't bother me much - I respect everyone I meet Thai, Farang or whatever. Thais are very insular and they are brought up that way it's how the Amaart retain their power so easily - deference and it ain't to farang!

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26 minutes ago, bkk6060 said:

Right now I doubt if many do.

The virus is obviously mostly a western issue now.

Thais probably think you are a big part of the problem or sick.

So, I guess do not expect much from them for the time being.

 

i wonder if there is a different sentiment regarding the foreigners age ? 

 

say a healthy young 43 year old such as myself vs an aging dinosaur who looks like he shared a room with death in college. this may have something to do with it.

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If you want to be on sociable terms

with a Thai you've got to tickle his or her

sense of humour and make him laugh, then

do them a favour of some kind.

A true trusted friend is a rare is a rare

item anywhere.

I just go around like I belong in the space I'm occupying during that time.....

Trading smiles continues to serve me well here (CM), even with masks.....I've never experienced any animosity or visible distain.....

That being said, I'm not out riding in tuktuks, songtou trucks, or motocy ekeing my way around either so it's possible that takes some of the locals judgements our of it.....

I walk & ride a bike around most days for some exercise & am greeted with hellos, smiles, and waves by Thais - more than would happen back home....

Expats, only mix with a few + don't do the club/bar/pub thing, that's an automatic "lost points/status" situation in most societies anyway.....

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19 minutes ago, mr mr said:

ay a healthy young 43 year old such as myself vs an aging dinosaur who looks like he shared a room with death in college. this may have something to do with it.

Never heard a 43 year old describe themselves as 'young'.

Back in your home country no woman would look at you (with anything apart from disgust).

 

Thailand, land of delusion.

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Three years now living in Thailand. as opposed to lots of visits over the years.  Year One, nightmare, didn't know how to get things done, everyone xxxxing me off.  Year 2, started to get a grip of myself and work things out, adapt and blend in.  Year three, great, would not live anywhere else. Like most things, it takes time, but if you put in the effort, stay calm (Jai Yen Yen, a great phrase that my wife uses almost every day on me), stay open minded, leave your western head in the fridge. this can be the best place to live in the World. 

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Somtam & Lao Khao, you'll be just like the locals.

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4 hours ago, YetAnother said:

the thais are a pretty shallow group; once you learn what thainess really means, at least to the level you need to, you will start avoiding thais and , likely, re-seekout the expat crowd

Avoid Thais in Thailand? Where do I go? No one really answered my question about where the strongest expat community is. Even the Expats are bothering me. They stare like they think they are Thais or something... Bloody hypocrites!! 

  • Author
3 hours ago, brokenbone said:

easiest way buy a big bike and join an mc club

Im not looking to fully integrate, yet. Im just here for a couple years while I take online classes. 

  • Author
3 hours ago, BritManToo said:

I avoid everyone.

Same as I avoided everyone when I lived in the UK.

I pretty much hated everywhere I go. Im just feeling particularly uncomfortable right now. Maybe covid is making things worse?

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Just now, racinkc1 said:

I pretty much hated everywhere I go. Im just feeling particularly uncomfortable right now. Maybe covid is making things worse?

I love everywhere I go ...... I just don't mix with the locals .....

beyond young women in bars of course, but that falls under my 'simple commerce' exclusion..

  • Author
3 hours ago, bkk6060 said:

Right now I doubt if many do.

The virus is obviously mostly a western issue now.

Thais probably think you are a big part of the problem or sick.

So, I guess do not expect much from them for the time being.

 

Do you really think Covid is making things worse? I plan on being here for a couple of years while I put myself through school. I just want to be able to walk down the street and not completely avoid eye contact.

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Get yourself a few Amulets, a Buriram footie shirt and a sak Yant...you'll blend in anywhere in Thailand.

3 minutes ago, racinkc1 said:

Do you really think Covid is making things worse? I plan on being here for a couple of years while I put myself through school. I just want to be able to walk down the street and not completely avoid eye contact.

Something you might want to consider is that most Thai people are falling for the CCP line on covid they believe that it came from America

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2 hours ago, faraday said:

Somtam & Lao Khao, you'll be just like the locals.

You're the only one who offered up some other places to check out. Why these areas?

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4 minutes ago, baansgr said:

Get yourself a few Amulets, a Buriram footie shirt and a sak Yant...you'll blend in anywhere in Thailand.

What about some elephant pants? Will elephant pants help me fit in?

16 minutes ago, racinkc1 said:

Avoid Thais in Thailand? Where do I go? No one really answered my question about where the strongest expat community is. Even the Expats are bothering me. They stare like they think they are Thais or something... Bloody hypocrites!! 

sorry but the only answer to that attitude is for you to go home. You really should not be here.  

  • Author
2 minutes ago, misterjames said:

Something you might want to consider is that most Thai people are falling for the CCP line on covid they believe that it came from America

I pray to Buddha thats not true! I will lose so much respect.

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