Two Mexicans are stuck in the desert, wandering aimlessly and close to death. They are close to just lying down and waiting for the inevitable when suddenly...

"Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell. Ees bacon, I is sure of eet."

"Si, Luis, eet smell like bacon to meee."

So, with renewed strength, they struggle off up the next sand dune and there, in the distance, is a tree just loaded with bacon. There is raw bacon, dripping with moisture, there's fried bacon, back bacon, double smoked bacon... every imaginable type of cured pig you can imagine!!

"Pepe, Pepe, we ees saved. Eees a bacon tree."

"Luis, are sure ees not a meerage? We ees in the desert, don' forget."

"Pepe, when deed you ever hear of a meerage that smeell of bacon... ees No meerage, ees a bacon tree."

And with that ...... Luis races toward the tree. He gets to within 5 metres, with Pepe following more slowly at a distance, when suddenly a machine gun opens up, and Luis is cut down in his tracks. It is clear he is mortally wounded but, true friend that he is, he manages to warn Pepe with his dying breath ...

"Pepe... go back man, you was right, ees not a bacon tree"

"Luis, Luis mi amigo... what ees eet?"

"Pepe... ees not a bacon tree...

"Ees....

Ees...

Ees...

Ees...

Ees, a Ham Bush"

You're Keeling me!