Aphorisms - Wise Sayings

APHORISM: (noun: A usually pithy and Familiar statement expressing an

observation or principle generally accepted as wise or true.

1. The nicest thing about the future is that it always starts tomorrow.

2. Money will buy a fine dog, but only kindness will make him wag his

tail.

3. If you don't have a sense of humor, you probably don't have any sense

at all.

4. Seat belts are not as confining as wheelchairs.

5. A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you're in deep water.

6. How come it takes so little time for a child who is afraid of the

dark to become a

teenager who wants to stay out all night?

7. Business conventions are important because they demonstrate how many

people a company can operate without.

8. Why is it that at class reunions you feel younger than everyone else

looks?

9. Scratch a dog and you'll find a permanent job.

10. No one has more driving ambition than the boy who wants to buy a

car.

11. There are no new sins; the old ones just get more publicity.

12. There are worse things than getting a call for a wrong number at 4

AM. It could be a right number.

13. Think about this... No one ever says "It's only a game." when his

team is winning.

14. Sometime everyone reaches the age where the happy hour is a nap

15. Be careful reading the fine print. There's no way you're going to

like it.

16. The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same

size bucket.

17. Do you realize that in about 40 years, we'll have thousands of OLD

LADIES running

around with tattoos? (And RAP music will be the Golden Oldies!)

18. Money can't buy happiness -- but somehow it's more comfortable to

cry in a Corvette than in a Yugo.

19. After a certain age, if you don't wake up aching in every joint, you

are probably dead.