Have you ever had a vaunted massage in Thailand? And, did it measure up to your expectations? Or, did you measure up to her expectations?

[GammaGlobulin]

My Dear Friends,

 

Personally, I have never had a massage in my life, neither a foot massage nor even a woman walking along my backbone in high heels.

 

Some say that a Thai message might be beneficial, and it might.  Yet, I cannot say one way or another from personal experience.

 

What I would say is that, personally, I do not normally like women I do not know, touching me.

 

Even, for example, I do not like to have anyone touching me, such as even a handshake, or, when boarding a plane, having anyone feeling me up to check out my private package.

 

Maybe, a Wai is always better.

 

Why?

 

If I were well hung, then I might like it, just to see the look of shock on anyone who checked me out.

 

I am not hung like an elephant, however. And therefore, since I have nothing to show, I really don’t want some man or woman to feel me up, when there is nothing noteworthy to feel.

 

I am not a prude.  If I had something very long to show, then I would, but I do not.

 

Personally, I would classify myself as shorter than very long, and longer then very short.

 

Sometimes I think that, if the airline industry was smart, and if they wished to increase passenger miles, then they would have a few very cute women who might be paid to feel up male passengers, before boarding in first class.

 

In past years, they asked us to take off our shoes before boarding.  Would it not be better, and would it not be more fun, before passing through security, just to remove your pants, and show what you got?

 

Of course, we should all remain respectful, and keep our pants on when we actually leave security, and before boarding.

 

Regarding massage places, I would never remove clothing before having a massage. I mean, why?

 

I have NEVER had even one massage.  My feet have never been massaged.  And, my foot has never been massaged, either, ever.

 

Sometimes, I think, maybe I am missing out on something.

 

But you know, there is also the question about following either a Dionysian or Apollonian lifestyle.

 

My best guess, after never having been there, is that a life in the bars can only lead to ruin, while a life pursuing higher things in museums can protect one from assured dissolution.

 

You know that I love TV guys, assuredly.  And, I would never try to influence you or anyone away from bars and debauchery, in any case.

 

Still, there does come a time when one must wake up and take notice about something higher than what most of you are usually thinking about…down there.

 

And, why do some girls refer to their privates as being…” down there”?

 

And, why do some girls love Robert Plant videos for showing what he has, down there?

 

Plant is an amazing guy.

 

But, of course…   Plant is from West Bromwich.

 

And, I guess, most guys from Bromwich are well hung, and can sing like Plant, too.

 

Nothing unusual in Bromwich, probably.

 

By the way.

Over the years.

Has Plant completely paid his dues.

Has he truly given you the love?

 

=======

 

Does anyone remember laughter??????????????????

 

 

[KhaoYai]

Oh jeez!

[GammaGlobulin]

Just now, KhaoYai said:

Oh jeez!

Plant is amazing.

 

Plant should have come to Thailand for a massage, too.

 

 

[KhaoYai]

4 minutes ago, GammaGlobulin said:

You know that I love TV guys, assuredly

I had to read that a few times before I got it ????

[GammaGlobulin]

5 minutes ago, KhaoYai said:

I had to read that a few times before I got it ????

Plant is simply amazing, as everybody knows.

 

Meaning his music and his moves.

 

Still, don't make more out of this appreciation for Plant, than simply his music and his moves.

 

Does anybody remember laughter?

 

Maybe, laughter is something we have forgotten?

[OneMoreFarang]

6 minutes ago, GammaGlobulin said:

Maybe, laughter is something we have forgotten?

We?

Maybe you forgot it.

Try!

 

[ChrisP24]

Gamma, I think that you are one of those rare individuals who has nurtured both lobes over the years, such that they both still work, and in fact they are both now paying you back as a result of the sustained investment you've made in them.

 

But as for massages, you have missed out on one of Dionysus' treasures.  I have had many therapeutic massages over my lifetime, and much prefer the Swedish style over the Thai style, which involves stretching and percussive techniques that for me feel more like being beaten up than being relaxed.  I have had some good Swedish-style massages in Thailand (more commonly called oil massages), but have found that it's not a commonly-trained technique except for the upscale (and overpriced) spas at resorts.

 

As for Plant, I enjoy his music but the bulge is better left in Plant's pants.

Edited December 18, 2021 by ChrisP24

[GammaGlobulin]

Personally, my preference, if I ever were to were to visit a massage parlor....then...

 

I would not wish to have a woman come on too strong.....at first.

 

I envision having a woman first chat me up.

 

Maybe, for example, she could first ask me about my tastes in books, music and food.

 

And then, she might slip her hand around, somewhere, innocuously, as if we were on a first date.

 

But, nothing heavy, at the beginning.

 

Then, we might listen to some good music for awhile.

 

These days, seemingly, no one has time, inclination nor the interest to get to know one another.

 

Everything is too impersonal.

 

This is the main reason I never visit places where they just give you a massage without first treating you with respect.

 

 

 

 

[AwwYesNice1]

OP = keep your dayjob 

 

Your humor is lame.

[GammaGlobulin]

Sometimes, I think, if I ever were to visit a soapy massage, then....there might be some woman there who could play me, like Hewitt plays JS Bach...

 

I have listened to Hewitt play JS Bach for hundreds of hours.

 

If she played me, like she plays the piano, then...I would be drained and consequently dead from it all.

Her fingers are amazing.

 

Fortunately, this has never happened to me.

 

So, ....  calm down.

 

Some say that Hewitt is one of the most interesting interpreters of JS Bach.  And others say she is a bit too romantic.

 

Who cares, because she is amazing.

I know.

 

Kudos to Hewitt, I say...

 

Enjoy this calming music after Plant, please...

 

And, if Plant were listening to this, his bulge would be uncontained, to say the least.

 

 

 

Edited December 18, 2021 by GammaGlobulin

[GammaGlobulin]

Unfortunately, in my opinion, Hewitt's feathers do not help her.

 

Hewitt's JS Bach is amazing.

 

However, I prefer to just listen, and not look...

 

Hewitt is amazing, I think.

 

Far better than Richter.

 

Schiff is good, though.

 

In the end, everybody has a different interpretation of any piece by JS Bach.

 

By the way....if you are unable to appreciate JS Bach, then how can you truly enjoy Led Zeppelin?

Pretty impossible, I would think...unless...you might be on crack, and thereby be unable to appreciate either one.

 

JMHO...

 

 

 

  

This piano playing is not Horse Feathers, for sure....

[jerrymahoney]

From the screenplay for the movie The Apartment Best Picture Oscar(tm) 1961:

 

Mildred! He's at it again.

 

 

[GammaGlobulin]

Speaking of Horse Feathers....

 

 

[zzaa09]

39 minutes ago, AwwYesNice1 said:

OP = keep your dayjob 

 

Your humor is lame.

...and his attempt at Thai-centric knowledge and connections.

Wannabe at best.

[GammaGlobulin]

2 minutes ago, zzaa09 said:

...and his attempt at Thai-centric knowledge and connections.

Wannabe at best.

No.

Eccentricity, at least.

Not a wannabe.

[Farmerslife]

From massages to Robert Plant to the Marx Brothers to Angela Hewitt. This one's a rocky ride, Mr. G. I'm struggling to keep up.

The trick is to return the original point so subtly that the reader is unaware until it arrives. Billy Connolly was the master of this. His stories would meander off over all manner of subjects that you had almost forgotten the starting point and then suddenly find yourself back at the beginning.  He was as brilliant a raconteur as he was a comedian.

If I may make a friendly suggestion,  you need to work on bringing your posts back to their original premise.  

 

[OneMoreFarang]

5 hours ago, GammaGlobulin said:

Personally, my preference, if I ever were to were to visit a massage parlor....then...

 

I would not wish to have a woman come on too strong.....at first.

 

I envision having a woman first chat me up.

 

Maybe, for example, she could first ask me about my tastes in books, music and food.

 

And then, she might slip her hand around, somewhere, innocuously, as if we were on a first date.

 

But, nothing heavy, at the beginning.

 

Then, we might listen to some good music for awhile.

 

These days, seemingly, no one has time, inclination nor the interest to get to know one another.

 

Everything is too impersonal.

 

This is the main reason I never visit places where they just give you a massage without first treating you with respect.

 

Do you want a massage, sex, or someone pretending to be on a romantic date with you?

[GammaGlobulin]

Just now, OneMoreFarang said:

Do you want a massage, sex, or someone pretending to be on a romantic date with you?

I would hope for a woman who does not come on too strong.

 

One who does not wish to thrash me about on the massage mat.

 

One, also, without a Y chromosome, if possible.

 

Thank you.

 

Glob

[GammaGlobulin]

7 minutes ago, Farmerslife said:

From massages to Robert Plant to the Marx Brothers to Angela Hewitt. This one's a rocky ride, Mr. G. I'm struggling to keep up.

The trick is to return the original point so subtly that the reader is unaware until it arrives. Billy Connolly was the master of this. His stories would meander off over all manner of subjects that you had almost forgotten the starting point and then suddenly find yourself back at the beginning.  He was as brilliant a raconteur as he was a comedian.

If I may make a friendly suggestion,  you need to work on bringing your posts back to their original premise.  

 

The premise?

 

You mean, measuring up?

 

[Farmerslife]

35 minutes ago, GammaGlobulin said:

The premise?

 

You mean, measuring up?

 

Indeed, back to your title and original post,  do massages disappoint or enthrall? 

[jerrymahoney]

1 hour ago, GammaGlobulin said:

The premise?

Attention.

[toofarnorth]

Never had a vaunted massage 'praps I should google vaunted. However I do have an oil massage every fortnight 350 B per hour , 10 mins from the finish I get a head and neck massage. Lovely , very nearly puts me to sleep. 1.5 hours and for Monday the right money is tucked under my keyboard.

[sipi]

Going through security at Kuala Lumpur airport some years back and the lady who was fully decked out in the habab or whatever it's called asked me to remove my belt, hold me arms to the side and walk through the machine.

Of course by the time I got to the other side my pants were around my ankles and she was chasing after me with her clipboard to cover my underwear.

I then asked her rather politely "do you know what a belt is actually designed for?"

[Stocky]

10 hours ago, GammaGlobulin said:

Plant is amazing.

I think you've been smoking way too much plant

[thaibeachlovers]

On 12/19/2021 at 10:03 AM, ChrisP24 said:

Gamma, I think that you are one of those rare individuals who has nurtured both lobes over the years, such that they both still work, and in fact they are both now paying you back as a result of the sustained investment you've made in them.

 

But as for massages, you have missed out on one of Dionysus' treasures.  I have had many therapeutic massages over my lifetime, and much prefer the Swedish style over the Thai style, which involves stretching and percussive techniques that for me feel more like being beaten up than being relaxed.  I have had some good Swedish-style massages in Thailand (more commonly called oil massages), but have found that it's not a commonly-trained technique except for the upscale (and overpriced) spas at resorts.

 

As for Plant, I enjoy his music but the bulge is better left in Plant's pants.

I had many Swedish style massages back home, before I discovered a better way to have a happy ending in LOS.

I also had a fair few Thai massages ( straight- no happy ending ), but never felt better for having had them.