Mad Cow Disease

[WillyL]

A female TV reporter arranged for an interview with a farmer living just outside Cornerbrook, Newfoundland, to find the main cause of the Mad Cow Disease.

The Lady Reporter: "Good evening, sir. I am here to collect information on the possible source of Mad Cow Disease. Can you offer any reason for this disease?"

The Farmer stared at the reporter and said, "Do you know that a bull mounts a cow only once a year?"

The Lady Reporter (obviously embarrassed) said, "Well, sir, that's a new piece of information, but what's the relation between this phenomenon and Mad Cow Disease?"

The Farmer: "And, madam, do you know that we milk a cow twice a day?"

The lady reporter said, " Sir, this is really valuable information, but what about getting to the point? "

The Farmer: "I am getting to the point, madam. Just imagine, if I was playing with your tits twice a day and only screwing you once a year, wouldn't you get mad?"

A family is sitting around the supper table. The son asks his father, "Dad, how many kinds of breasts are there?

The father, surprised, answers, "Well, son, there are three kinds of breasts. In her twenties, a women`s breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her thirties to forties, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After fifty, they are like onions." "Onions?" "Yes, see them and they make you cry."

This infurated the wife and daughter so the daughter said."Mom, how many kinds of penises are there?"

The mother, surprised, smiles and looks at her daughter and answers, "Well dear, a man goes through three phases. In a man`s twenties, his penis is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his thirties and forties, it is a birch, flexible but reliable. After his fifties, it is like a Christmas tree." "A Christmas tree?" "Yes, dead from the root up and the balls are for decoration only!"

This farmer has 500 hens but no rooster so he goes to his neighbor and asks him if he could buy a rooster for $100.

The neighbor says, "You can have this rooster. His name's Roy. He'll get all your hens pregnant. He's a real stud."

So the farmer takes him home and says, "It's your first day so take it slow, okay?"

The farmer puts Roy in the hen house and then hears all the hens crying and yelling. Roy nailed every one of those hens and then nailed a duck and a goose at a pond.

The next morning the farmer finds Roy lying dead with his legs sticking in the air and buzzards circling overhead.

The farmer says, "Roy, did you have to die?"

Roy says, "Quiet! They're about to land!"

[Needhelp10]

hahaha!!

They are all nice jokes!

I think i liked the first one most