The boss of the Samut Prakan Crocodile Farm call his chief croc wrestler to his office and says 'You and your team have been doing the same routine for the last twenty years. Twice a day matinee and main performance you wrestle with the crocs, stick your head in their mouths and pull their tails. It's all boring predictable stuff and the punters have had enough. Attendances are dropping and so is the cash flow. You've got 48 hours to come up with something new or I'm going to have to let you go'

The croc-man is horrified; thought he had a job for life and spends a sleepless night discussing new routines with his wife before hitting on a winner.

Next morning he telephones the boss and tells him to be at the matinee performance when he will see something so exciting that the tourists will be breaking down the gates to get in.

Comes the matinee, the boss is sitting in the bleachers with the usual collection of domestic and international tourists.

The croc-man and his team enter the arena and go through the usual routine with a sluggish response from the crown and yawns from the boss.

Suddenly, the croc-man turns and faces the crowd and says in a loud clear voice: 'Ladies and Gentlemen. The next trick could cost me more than my life so I must ask you to be absolutely quiet and still'

He turns back as, his helpers carry in a waist high wooden table with a young croc on top, barely a metre in length. The croc-man unzips his fly and pulls out his penis. To a roll of drums he lifts the crocs upper jaw and inserts his member into the croc's mouth. The drum roll beats louder as he closes the croc's jaw firmly then, pulling a heavy wooden stick from his belt he beats the croc across its head and jaws. The crowd gasp!. Women scream. The drums stop beating and croc man pulls his member out, turns and shows it to the crowd who can see that it is intact and unmarked.

A spontaneous burst of applause erupts and croc-man leers at his boss; then raising both arms he addresses the crowd. 'Right, ladies and gentlemen. Is there anyone in the audience who would like to try that'

People turn to their neighbours shaking their heads then twist around as a Pattaya katoy stands up in the back row and shrills out 'Yes please, I'd like to try it but please don't beat me with the stick'