jaiyenyen Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 My G/F and i are more than happy to hold hands in public. However, i have noticed a distinct tightening of my grip as we pass ATM's. Is this normal? Should i seek help? Regards Jaiyenyen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tracer5050 Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 I hold my wife hand when in Bangkok . And sometime in the Village her family does not even look at us any more . She is conformable with this. I dont kiss her in public on the mouth , only on forehead she told ma a long time ago this is ok as we are married. but i do try to blend in with her custom in the village when we are there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fasp Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 Of course my wife and I are holdings hands in public, it feels natural for both of us. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wolf359 Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 certainly not i'm British!!!!!!!! I do and I'm English !! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meom Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 Mrs Meom is from an older generation (hitting 49 this year) so she's not to fond of holding hands. That's ok with me cause I don't care to much either. Sometimes she grabs my hand in the street market when I wander off to the right and she wants to go left and that's about it. She does however kowtow to my feet before we go to sleep so that compensates a lot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jetjock Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 My wife usually holds my hand so I don't trip over something or get lost ! I have a bad habit of focusing all my attention on all the beautiful Thai girls walking down the street rather than watching out where I am going. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
howtoescape Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 What i can never understand is why Thai men are more then willing to put there arm round each other when walking in the mall or wherever but not so happy to hold their girls hand. I did ask ex why this was so but she seemed as confused as i. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sukanyacondo Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 The country is falling apart, the government is a bunch of.... investement is floundering, the people are broke and this is the best you can come up with..you must be an estate agent or a chartered surveyor..go and join the farangoloid that got short changed by 5 fXXXX ing baht from Mc Donalds The Original post is more about "changing attitudes" than holding hands and if they all start holding hands maybe they will all start thinking more about all the other problems in Thailand. My wife actually kissed me in public at the airport this time when I left for the Uk a first for her in 2 years!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
qwertz Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 I don't have a wife so holding hands is low on my list of things to think about today. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratchabuild Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 I don't think this has ever been about offending other Thais, but more of what other Thais would think about your Thai wife. In the early days of my marriage (Viet Nam war era), just standing next to each other in Bangkok would have other Thais misunderstanding our relationship. Now, it is no longer an issue and any Thai having problems with a foreigner/Thai couple holding hands in public has never been to a mall. Most of the Thai/ falang couples in a mall are in a paid relationship at least in Pattaya and Hua Hin and Bangkok etc etc etc what bar girls are paid to do should not inform your understanding of what is acceptable in Thai society. It is changing and younger thais do hold hands. Upcountry perhaps the old ways are more common. Some bar girls have told me when I have played pool with them that they dont like to be pawed by falangs. That includes holding hands, they all add that as they are paid to hold hands and more they have no choice. Most of the older falangs are of course of an age where they would never in polite society, hold hands in public even if their partners are considerably younger. My wife would be scandalised at us holding hands in public. After we had been in her village for a while and its a fairly prosperous village with lots of well off thais a rich old woman came up to me and started talking to me.. The old lady was saying that she had watched me since I first visited and she had noticed how polite I was and proper by not touching my wife in public. She also said how different I was than the other falangs married to Thai women in the village who caused in her view much embarrassment by their public displays of affection. It certainly helped me to be accepted in the village because the old lady is a major landowner and well respected and made me be better accepted than the other falangs who they steer clear of. Of course the more educated the thais the more tolerant of falangs they are. Many thai women are worried that if they hold hands in public others will assume they are bar girls and being paid to do so. It drives me crazy at times to not touch my wife in public but....when in Rome.......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratchabuild Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 lots of my friends who are thai hold eachothers hands in public. i think a BIG thing regarding this is the age factor. Thais i know under 30 are quite different then more hardcore thais. Most of my friends are 18-25, all of them are very westernized and laugh at the how closedminded some older thais are. If your in an inappropriate place for hand holding then it is understandable, but if you refuse to hold your wifes hand (.. is she actually your wife? or did you meet her in a money for sex scenario ? i know i know touchy topic here, but plz.. realism first) on the basis that you would offend thai people, then following that type of mindset, you think that you would not be marrying a thai person, as that would offend a certain type of thai people. another ridiculous thread.. jesus all these people sitting around here with out jobs ( or with jobs where they just hang out online on thai visa all day?) need to get their shit together! I think perhaps its time we introduced an upper age limit for TV memebership and perhaps make sure they are working too and not misusing firms computers. Perhaps we could nominate someone to make these oh so neccessary changes, perhaps give him a title like Governor Organising Details, my nomination would of course be cool guy Cory or GOD for short Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Man River Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 Most of the Thai/ falang couples in a mall are in a paid relationship at least in Pattaya and Hua Hin and Bangkok etc etc etc what bar girls are paid to do should not inform your understanding of what is acceptable in Thai society. What? Most Thai/foreigner couples that happen to be in malls are in paid relationships in Pattaya, HH and Bangkok? You must be joking. If not, what malls are you referring to? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duratanium Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 Holding her hand is the only way to make sure she walks at the same speed as me instead of drifting soooo far behind with her little legs LOL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ajarnmark Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 Certainly, if I had one. My current GF is not from Isaan and I am not farang so no problem for me I could hold her hands as most thais believe that i m one of them Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RAZZELL Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 I don't think this has ever been about offending other Thais, but more of what other Thais would think about your Thai wife. In the early days of my marriage (Viet Nam war era), just standing next to each other in Bangkok would have other Thais misunderstanding our relationship. Now, it is no longer an issue and any Thai having problems with a foreigner/Thai couple holding hands in public has never been to a mall. Most of the Thai/ falang couples in a mall are in a paid relationship at least in Pattaya and Hua Hin and Bangkok etc etc etc what bar girls are paid to do should not inform your understanding of what is acceptable in Thai society. It is changing and younger thais do hold hands. Upcountry perhaps the old ways are more common. Some bar girls have told me when I have played pool with them that they dont like to be pawed by falangs. That includes holding hands, they all add that as they are paid to hold hands and more they have no choice. Most of the older falangs are of course of an age where they would never in polite society, hold hands in public even if their partners are considerably younger. My wife would be scandalised at us holding hands in public. After we had been in her village for a while and its a fairly prosperous village with lots of well off thais a rich old woman came up to me and started talking to me.. The old lady was saying that she had watched me since I first visited and she had noticed how polite I was and proper by not touching my wife in public. She also said how different I was than the other falangs married to Thai women in the village who caused in her view much embarrassment by their public displays of affection. It certainly helped me to be accepted in the village because the old lady is a major landowner and well respected and made me be better accepted than the other falangs who they steer clear of. Of course the more educated the thais the more tolerant of falangs they are. Many thai women are worried that if they hold hands in public others will assume they are bar girls and being paid to do so. It drives me crazy at times to not touch my wife in public but....when in Rome.......... Interesting post...but to paint everyone with such a broad brush is ridiculous... Maybe in YOUR village...but what about the next one??? RAZZ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jersey_UK Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 Quite often. She always takes ME by the hand when I have to cross the road though! Me too! Otherwise no, I don't think it is because of any "Thai reasons" (certainly not on my part!).........more likely that both of us are not "touchy feely" type people (or both emotionally repressed ). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neeranam Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 I genearally walk down the street holding her tits..and she holds my dick..have you nothing better to do?Why not take off your strait jacket and go and play way a bread knife....the world will keep on turning thankfully Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
true blue Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 mine holds my arm with both hands think she thinks im going to run away Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rtaxron Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 My G/F always holds my hand as she knows its always in the pocket where my wallet is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tuky Posted August 21, 2007 Share Posted August 21, 2007 My wife wouldn't even kiss me when the guy at the Amphur pronounced us man and wife and suggested we kiss. Never a chance she would hold my hand. Thank god. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xangsamhua Posted August 22, 2007 Share Posted August 22, 2007 My wife wouldn't even kiss me when the guy at the Amphur pronounced us man and wife and suggested we kiss.Never a chance she would hold my hand. Thank god. We never used to until the last few years. Now we're ancient we figure we're allowed to. No one says anything, and we run into students and parents all the time. There was certainly no kissing at the wedding and we never held hands or kissed before we were married. Now that's going back a while! The days when "dating" meant going out with your girlfriend and a whole bunch of people. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suszzy Posted August 22, 2007 Share Posted August 22, 2007 I genearally walk down the street holding her tits..and she holds my dick..have you nothing better to do?Why not take off your strait jacket and go and play way a bread knife....the world will keep on turning thankfully Easy..tiger!! Take it easy. live is too short. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scalawag Posted August 22, 2007 Share Posted August 22, 2007 Only when I've had too many Gin and Tonics and need help down the stairs........................ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chinthee Posted August 22, 2007 Share Posted August 22, 2007 I find the most politically correct thing to do is just walk slightly behind her, holding her upper arm and make her do a sort of "perp walk." That way she catches all the flak before I do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meemiathai Posted August 22, 2007 Share Posted August 22, 2007 Is this real? Who said husbands and wives, bfs and gfs cannot hold hands in public in thailand? Never heard such bullshit! I am going to check the time and date here just in case I accidentally have taken the time machine back to 300 hundred years ago! We hold hands 99% of the time when we are in the streets wherever we are! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meemiathai Posted August 22, 2007 Share Posted August 22, 2007 She often reaches for my hand, and I enjoy holding her hand when we walk. Sometimes we get more cuddly than that She really doesn't care what others think. did'nt do it in england and dont do it in thailand ,besides how would you smoke ,hold your fags and lighter ,you'd need 3 hands.. cigarette in your left hand, lighter in her right Generally, the lady walks on the left and the man on the right. So different hands then. Let me guess why. I think coz generally a man uses his right hand to handle things that might occur in the streets so it is natural to keep his right hand free. For the lady, the man is there to protect her, so most importantly is for her to hold on tight to the man with her right hand. Also, the man should always walk on the side of the pavement which is nearer to the street. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zaza Posted August 22, 2007 Share Posted August 22, 2007 I don't have a wife so I can't answer this Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a2396 Posted August 22, 2007 Share Posted August 22, 2007 This is one aspect of the "culture" here that is carried to far. It is true you rarely see this or any other form of affection shown. I don't even see Thais touch their children very often. This does not make for one who is able to easily express affection, in public or out. I know this is an Asian thing, but I was recently surprised to see couples holding hands and strolling "arm in arm" walking the streets of Kuala Lumpur, which 10 years ago was as restrictive as Thailand, if not more so. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meemiathai Posted August 22, 2007 Share Posted August 22, 2007 I don't think this has ever been about offending other Thais, but more of what other Thais would think about your Thai wife. In the early days of my marriage (Viet Nam war era), just standing next to each other in Bangkok would have other Thais misunderstanding our relationship. Now, it is no longer an issue and any Thai having problems with a foreigner/Thai couple holding hands in public has never been to a mall. Most of the Thai/ falang couples in a mall are in a paid relationship at least in Pattaya and Hua Hin and Bangkok etc etc etc what bar girls are paid to do should not inform your understanding of what is acceptable in Thai society. It is changing and younger thais do hold hands. Upcountry perhaps the old ways are more common. Some bar girls have told me when I have played pool with them that they dont like to be pawed by falangs. That includes holding hands, they all add that as they are paid to hold hands and more they have no choice. Most of the older falangs are of course of an age where they would never in polite society, hold hands in public even if their partners are considerably younger. My wife would be scandalised at us holding hands in public. After we had been in her village for a while and its a fairly prosperous village with lots of well off thais a rich old woman came up to me and started talking to me.. The old lady was saying that she had watched me since I first visited and she had noticed how polite I was and proper by not touching my wife in public. She also said how different I was than the other falangs married to Thai women in the village who caused in her view much embarrassment by their public displays of affection. It certainly helped me to be accepted in the village because the old lady is a major landowner and well respected and made me be better accepted than the other falangs who they steer clear of. Of course the more educated the thais the more tolerant of falangs they are. Many thai women are worried that if they hold hands in public others will assume they are bar girls and being paid to do so. It drives me crazy at times to not touch my wife in public but....when in Rome.......... Interesting post...but to paint everyone with such a broad brush is ridiculous... Maybe in YOUR village...but what about the next one??? RAZZ Right! We even hug each other in public in her village. Everyone knows us as husband and wife. We even go to bath together. What thailand are people talking about? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sukanyacondo Posted August 22, 2007 Share Posted August 22, 2007 She often reaches for my hand, and I enjoy holding her hand when we walk. Sometimes we get more cuddly than that She really doesn't care what others think. did'nt do it in england and dont do it in thailand ,besides how would you smoke ,hold your fags and lighter ,you'd need 3 hands.. cigarette in your left hand, lighter in her right Generally, the lady walks on the left and the man on the right. So different hands then. Let me guess why. I think coz generally a man uses his right hand to handle things that might occur in the streets so it is natural to keep his right hand free. For the lady, the man is there to protect her, so most importantly is for her to hold on tight to the man with her right hand. Also, the man should always walk on the side of the pavement which is nearer to the street. Yeah right and motorcycles will have thier lights on everyone will give signals where they intend to go, dogs will clean up behind them and the pavements will be like billiard tables??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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