If You Could Become Thai

[ThaiGirlTeen]

Thai to Farang = I would,

Moan all Day about Thailand, but still stay here.

Complain that my Thai gf needs money to send to her family.

Expect her Family never ever to get ill and need a hospital.

Think that her brother is really her Husband.

Have a hideous body but still think i look good.

Wonder why Thai people communicate in a language that i do not understand.

Wonder why imported food is expensive.

Dye my hair a Reddish Brown colour to hide the Grey, and think nobody will notice.

Be 70 and still think i look 45.

Wonder why poor people have no money.

Think i am doing Thailand a favour by staying here.

etc etc

[Halo]

Great posting's not sure who I agree with the most cutethaigirl or Thaigirlteen.

[RamdomChances]

If I was a Thai man for a day I'd

Drink Lao Chao at 8 in the morning

Spend the afternoon with my mia noi

Gamble away my whole months wages

Drink more Lao Chao

Go home slap the wife around a bit

Shower and go to bed

Sorry just feeling a bit cyinical today

[Tornado]

Thai to Farang = I would,

Moan all Day about Thailand, but still stay here.

Complain that my Thai gf needs money to send to her family.

Expect her Family never ever to get ill and need a hospital.

Think that her brother is really her Husband.

Have a hideous body but still think i look good.

Wonder why Thai people communicate in a language that i do not understand.

Wonder why imported food is expensive.

Dye my hair a Reddish Brown colour to hide the Grey, and think nobody will notice.

Be 70 and still think i look 45.

Wonder why poor people have no money.

Think i am doing Thailand a favour by staying here.

etc  etc         

If I was Thai for 24 hours, I would pick my nose while I chatted away at a meeting

[konangrit]

If I was a Thai man for a day I'd

Drink Lao Chao at 8 in the morning

Spend the afternoon with my mia noi

Gamble away my whole months wages

Drink more Lao Chao

Go home slap the wife around a bit

Shower and go to bed

Sorry just feeling a bit cyinical today

Sounds surprisingly similar to some western guys I know......

[hkthai]

If I was a Thai man for a day I'd

Drink Lao Chao at 8 in the morning

Spend the afternoon with my mia noi

Gamble away my whole months wages

Drink more Lao Chao

Go home slap the wife around a bit

Shower and go to bed

Sorry just feeling a bit cyinical today

Sounds surprisingly similar to some western guys I know......

Replace the word western with Americans, British, French, Germans, Thais, Chinese, or Japanese and you will see that it happens all over the world.

BTW, Give us Thais more credit than that.

We shag our wives first then we beat her.

Then we drink Hei - nee - ken at 8 am and all day everyday.

Gamble our life savings away.

Ask for money from the wifey and beat her if she doesn't have any.

Spend it on the Mia Noi.

Extort money from sister farang boyfriend.

Gamble and drink some more.

Go home and beat the wife some more.

I think that about does it.

[Begs]

[mbkudu]

Life is beautiful.

[RamdomChances]

Hi hkthai,

I did say I was felling a bit cyinical, better today.

Yes I know its sweeping a generalisation, but so are the rest, although they are a bit more light hearted.

Yes you are all right it does happen everywhere, exept for thr Lao Chao

For balance, if I was a thai man 2

Get up at 5 in morning

Eat some rice

Pack my lunch food (in my bin dtor one of those multi level things)

Go to work all day in the boiling sun for a pitance

Mabye have a beer or couple of shots of Lao Chow after work

Go home to my wife, mother, mother-in-law, father, father-in-law, kids, brothers, sisters, their kids, that I'm looking after cos they"ve gone to BKK to earn some decent money.

Have some food, shower, go to bed early cos tomorrow have to do it all again.

In my spare time look after the couple of rai, cows, chickens, ect the family have.

Look forward to the next holiday, where I can drink, eat, and play cards all day if I want cos I dont have to get up for work.

Cheers RC

[hkthai]

Hi hkthai,

I did say I was felling a bit cyinical, better today.

Yes I know its sweeping a generalisation, but so are the rest, although they are a bit more light hearted.

Yes you are all right it does happen everywhere, exept for thr Lao Chao

For balance, if I was a thai man 2

Get up at 5 in morning

Eat some rice

Pack my lunch food (in my bin dtor one of those multi level things)

Go to work all day in the boiling sun for a pitance

Mabye have a beer or couple of shots of Lao Chow after work

Go home to my wife, mother, mother-in-law, father, father-in-law, kids, brothers, sisters, their kids, that I'm looking after cos they"ve gone to BKK to earn some decent money.

Have some food, shower, go to bed early cos tomorrow have to do it all again.

In my spare time look after the couple of rai, cows, chickens, ect the family have.

Look forward to the next holiday, where I can drink, eat, and play cards all day if I want cos I dont have to get up for work.

Cheers RC

RC

Hope you didn't read too much into it. I realized you were being cynical and I thought I would just go completely overboard to see if I get a bite.

Not too much into the Lao Kao. Some of the mixtures are really strong. The last time I had a couple of shots and thought that fire would come out the other end.

BTW, I do know of a few people like my post. Just replace the word "beating" with "ignore", "life savings" with "a pittnance of the inheritance", and "shagging the wife" with "shaging women1...women2...you get the picture.

hkthai

[RamdomChances]

No prob

Like I say they are all just generalisations, sh!t happens everywhere

Most of my friends are Thai men cos theres not a falang within 50km of me

[NedKelly]

I'd set up a stand outside all those beer bars n pubs and sell hotdogs ubtil 2am.

Go to the barbers shop and fall asleep while the female haircutter trims my nasal hair and the hairs on my ear lobes and while she also shaves my forehead ???

Be a motor cycle taxi driver and drink beer chang while still on the job.

Wear an open necked safari suit with loads of gold chains and huge rings on my fingers.

walk around and make that silly little 'tsk' or 'titch' sound with my mouth every time I came near a farang guy........then I'd flick my head from side to side to make my spine crack like a boxer before a fight.

Pay a low price to enter various atttractions.

Buy heaps of nice land in the mountains and on the beach., then sell it at a profit and put it in my farang bank account.

[Ben Dover]

I'd sit with all the other Thais and snigger at the farrangs complaining all day..

[Tornado]

I'd sit with all the other Thais and snigger at the farrangs complaining all day..

I see you wife Eileen in the photo, but where is the dog, run?

Oh BTW, a nice PC post

[Azul_Blanco]

Spellbound - you really shouldn't take credit for your earlier posts - I'm not sure if BKK Phil was the first to come up with them but I saw all of these on his bangkokmouth.com over a year ago. Great website BTW. Anyway, If I was Thai for a day, I would go back to the construction company I just visited and ask for a new price quote.

Oh, new topic idea!

If a tree falls in a forest and nobody is there to hear it, does it make a sound? --- thought of that myself : )

[medicinebox]

I would wait and see, if the only way I knew I was hungry was when my arse stopped burning, was true after all.

[wolf5370]

I'd go to the local loan shark borrow lots of cash and put it in my Farang bank account. Two days latter, he isn't going to find that Thai guy who borrowed all the money.

Can I pick the 2 days? I would wait for the election and vote for anyone other than Thaksin.