Wedding Day Ceremony Details/suggestions?

[Yager]

My fiance and I are trying to plan out our wedding day. She is asking me what I would like to do about Everything. When I try to get information from her about Thai customs and wedding procedures she really doesn't give me a whole lot of info. She is expecting me to help plan everything and I am totally lost. Can anyone help me with a basic outline of the engagement/wedding ceremonies? The facts I know so far:

The wedding will be in Bangkok. In the morning there will be an engagement, then morning ceremony, and then and evening party. I'm mostly worried about everything in the morning. Her parents grew up in Isaan, moved to BKK to raise a family, and now have moved back to Isaan. They will be coming to BKK for the wedding so I will not be going to their house for any part of the ceremony. Can anyone fill me in with details about what will be expected of me, what types of traditions will or should take place? Or suggestions on what ceromony parts I should choose. I know it's probably a little different for everyone, but I'm looking for suggestions or info. I need some stucture haha.

[sgunn65]

My best advice to you? Get assertive!!! You are entering a world you don't know and she is deferring to you because she feels it is right to do so.

I got married in Bkk in April and after the initial deferral I encouraged my wife to choose the wedding she wanted and she loved it. There are so many parts to the ceremony it might be worth letting a wedding company arrange it. I used http://www.ruenjoawsao.com/ they were fantastic. The venue is great and the total bill for everything was less than a grand (a third of the price most hotels charge).

Once your gf has taken over you can sit back and enjoy the ride. Have fun.

[spot]

We didn't have a morning ceremony, and nobody seemed to mind.

If you book a night time ceremony with a hotel, they will usually take care of everything for you. If you do decide to have a morning ceremony, the hotel will let you book a smaller room for a short time, again, they will usually take care of all the arrangements.

If you get photographs done beforehand, which seems the norm here, the photo studio will hire you outfits for the big day as part of the package.

Just start by calling in to a few hotels.

Hope it goes well.

[Tango7]

HI

I got married last month..Chinese style more than Thai but it's similar from what I understand.

The morning ceremony is where special guests are invited to witness the "marriage"... the bride should be in the house and you should turn up to collect her.

You need to pass through "gates" made of thin gold chains held at either end by her friends or family. You'll have to pay a toll to get past. This toll is in the form of an envelope with money inside and inside is usually 100 - 300 Baht ( depending on how rich you are and how many of these gates you have to go through.

When I got married, I had a "best man" typ of figure who was a friend of my wife's dad. He prepared the envelopes and the money inside. I was later told he handed out 120 envelopes but at another wedding there were only thre gates and only 9 envelopes... it's down to money and what you or your best man can afford... but it's a case of going through the motions and how comfortable people feel.

I was lucky, my wife's family is great and we get along very well and so the atmosphere was excellent and very lively, but again, it's down to how well people know each other. I loved the morning part as it was lively and fun.

My best man dragged me through all the shouting women and eventually placed me on the sofa where I sat and was photographed by all present and then my wife came downstairs looking stunning and it was all right again.

We knelt in front of a table which had three "things" made of banana leaves...these things held money..( 1 million Baht ) gold ( 200,000 ) and rings ( whatever )

But this isn't really important...well, the amount anyway. Just have something prepared.

Now, sometimes the money and gold goes to the parents, but in my case I got it all back..it was just for show.

Then, special guests are asked to sprinkle some seeds or flowers etc over those items and bride and groom..for good luck's sake... about 8 people did this.

We then had to kneel down in front of parents, aunts, uncles and brothers / sisters to receive gifts from them and give a small guest.

Her mum and dad gave us watches and gold and we gave some ok quality glassware...again... a bit of a token.

Chinese style involves drinking tea with each person as a good luck thingy but this isn't a Thai part.

This lasted longer than I liked. I was getting hot and bothered but it was simple enough.

To be honest, I organised nothing. Her family organised the lot, from cars picking me up, so money being given and flowers, cars etc back.

Your wife ough to be ensuring that she or her family is preparing this. It's not your responsibility, it's her side of the family's job..BUT...don't let that start an argument.

You can't possible know what you need or how to prepare.....

The evening is a breeze.

Book a hotel, determine how many guests there will be, decide whether you want a buffet or sit down meal and choose a package. The package will include food, free flowing soft drinks, a cake and some flowers, but you'll want extra flowers and don't let the hotel tell you only they can do it...

I could go on for ages here, but the best thing to do is to email me at [email protected] and I'll answer as many questions as I can...

BUT..get a good photographer...I can recommend a good one or two, but of all the things that were important, the photos were the most... memories !!

Make sure she looks stunning, make sure you feel comfortable, do your best and mak sure YOU are as happy as she is.

Anyway, feel free to email me.