Worried About Thai Women..help

[fsk9777]

I may sound crazy, but I am a little worried, my boyfriend and I are moving to Bangkok this week for a few months for work. We've been together for 6 years but he is a flirt and asian women seem to love him, he's tall, white and a friendly guy...I'm worried about the women in Bangkok, are they really as agressive as people say they are? I'm going to be out of town on business for 1 week and feel nervous to leave him in Bangkok alone,....he loves to party and go to bars, I mean if he's going to cheat, he's going to cheat..but still, am I an idiot for moving to a country where there is more opportunity to? What areas should I avoid? Also are the women really like this? I am stressed out about all this.

[game4shame]

I'm going to be out of town on business for 1 week

[Jersey_UK]

I'm going to be out of town on business for 1 week and feel nervous to leave him in Bangkok alone,....he loves to party and go to bars

I like to go to bars also. and am happily married. Maybe I could Chaperone him?

It's not cheating if you have only a hazy recollection

[khunopie]

Are you smoking hot? If you are, or aren't, you should worry. In my years here, I have seen most foreigner relationships go up in flames. Thai women can be some of the most beautiful and loving in asia, if not sweet mother Earth, and most western men (read 99%) simply cannot resist the charms of Thai women. (pardon my French)

Speaking as a white guy, I would never shack up with a western girl in asia, and especially Bangkok. OMG I heart Thai girls.

Peace and luv,

white toast

Edited September 28, 2007 by khunopie

[canadiangirl]

Oh yeah, welcome to another undesirable aspect of Thailand -- white guys who trash white women! Smug in their newfound ability to get laid in the third world, they trash-talk the women who wouldn't give them the time of day at home.

But for whatever reason, white guys are the subject of much attention by Thai women in Thailand. If some of the sad cases here can be the center of attention, I can imagine that your boyfriend will receive his shares of advances as well.

Men who like Thai women as a "type" say that they love how hyper-feminine they are, and how they take care of their men. Men who don't like Thai women as a "type" complain they are superficial, childish and not very intellectual. (I'm not talking about specific individual people here, merely general tendencies.)

I had a conversation with a French woman with runs a restaurant with her French husband in Laos. The situation with Laos women is a bit more low-key than Thailand, but there are some similarities. She said that she had definitely stepped up her game in terms of seduction, keeping her husband interested and the spark in their relationship (they seemed quite happily married and in love to me), while keeping a watchful eye on Laos women around him. In the end, you can't do much about a man intent on cheating (other than dumping him and finding a better one) -- but everyone likes to feel appreciated, attractive and wanted. IMHO, I would personally put a bit of extra effort into keeping myself looking hot (Bangkok is a great place for spas, manicures, massages, shopping -- everything you need to look great!) and keeping the spice in my relationship to counter outside temptations.

Thai women are quite jealous, and won't put up with any bullshit from other women, so really, you shouldn't either. If all else fails, they also have a rather effective "punishment" for cheating boyfriends. (Thailand is #1 for penis reattachment surgery in the world, apparently. :-P

Edited September 28, 2007 by canadiangirl

[sutnyod]

The Thai women I know are all very strong and compassionate, but shy and reserved and would not even consider 'stealing' husbands or boyfriends. Arguably this seems to be the majority of Thai women. Please don't generalize and think you are dealing with desperate cheaters all over.... Even in the event you might end up without your boyfriend, tell yourself it would probably have happened anyway (and could happen anywhere). Look for something in Thailand that you feel attracted to. Who knows, maybe you find a life-time friendship here or get cultural insights you like...

[Jockstar]

I may sound crazy, but I am a little worried, my boyfriend and I are moving to Bangkok this week for a few months for work. We've been together for 6 years but he is a flirt and asian women seem to love him, he's tall, white and a friendly guy...I'm worried about the women in Bangkok, are they really as agressive as people say they are? I'm going to be out of town on business for 1 week and feel nervous to leave him in Bangkok alone,....he loves to party and go to bars, I mean if he's going to cheat, he's going to cheat..but still, am I an idiot for moving to a country where there is more opportunity to? What areas should I avoid? Also are the women really like this? I am stressed out about all this.

Could happen anywhere. The question i have for you is. Has he cheated before? You seem really worried that he will cheat on you here? Yes there are many beautiful women here and yes he may be tempted. Also its healthy to look. But you got to ask your self is. Do you trust him?

[OxfordWill]

The simple answer as others have hinted is that no- Thai women are not as aggressive as you have heard. But "bad girls" are on tap in Bangkok and if your bf is the type to go exploring bars on his own at night, he is going to end up meeting plenty of them.

[backflip]

"We've been together for 6 years but he is a flirt and asian women seem to love him..."

You blame is misplaced. You're blaming the women, and it's your boyfriend who's the problem. Why would you be in a relationship with someone you can't trust? I thought women were marter than that.

[jaiyenyen]

I have a G/F, Thai not European, and we live in Bangkok.

I still like to go out to the bars on my own occasionally. Coversations with bargirls generally run along the lines of :

Q/ What is your name..........................A/ give name

Q/ Where you from..............................A/ England but I live in Bangkok now

Q/You buy me drink?............................A/ Yes, of course,

Get's drink

Q/ You have girlfriend?..........................A/ Yes I have Thai girlfriend

Q/ Can we go short/long time.................A/ No! I told you, I have girlfriend, I love her very much, I will not short/long time anyone, I am just happy to talk and watch the dancing.

Q/ You are good man, why can't I find a man like you?...........................A/ Thank you, I hope you find a good man one day.

See, It's all about self control. If you find that your B/f has none, then maybe take a leaf out of the Thai womans book, cut off his todger, and feed it to the ducks

Good luck, and enjoy your stay in Thailand.

Regards

Jaiyenyen

[Phil Conners]

Jeez, if ever I saw a TROLL.

Why? Does people just have too much time on their hand? If you're bored at work why not go check youtube (or did it get blocked by your companys firewall?)

[mikethevigoman]

I may sound crazy, but I am a little worried, my boyfriend and I are moving to Bangkok this week for a few months for work. We've been together for 6 years but he is a flirt and asian women seem to love him, he's tall, white and a friendly guy...I'm worried about the women in Bangkok, are they really as agressive as people say they are? I'm going to be out of town on business for 1 week and feel nervous to leave him in Bangkok alone,....he loves to party and go to bars, I mean if he's going to cheat, he's going to cheat..but still, am I an idiot for moving to a country where there is more opportunity to? What areas should I avoid? Also are the women really like this? I am stressed out about all this.

Im afraid it sounds like you know the answer to the question already ..if you tie him up in a shed in buri ram you will not be removing the desire,and thats the problem,.the problem dosent lie with the women, if hes not trustworthy that is the problem you need to address,.

[britmaveric]

Oh yeah, welcome to another undesirable aspect of Thailand -- white guys who trash white women! Smug in their newfound ability to get laid in the third world, they trash-talk the women who wouldn't give them the time of day at home.

But for whatever reason, white guys are the subject of much attention by Thai women in Thailand. If some of the sad cases here can be the center of attention, I can imagine that your boyfriend will receive his shares of advances as well.

And why would that be undesirable aspect of thailand???? (somehow I don't think lads would feel the same way)

For the OP - don't worry if your lad is a cheater, doesnt matter where he is in the world.

[toptuan]

"He is a flirt..."

Sweety, you made your bed by marrying someone with this characteristic. Now lie in it

(....or rather, be prepared for someone else to lie in it.....

[mikethevigoman]

I may sound crazy, but I am a little worried, my boyfriend and I are moving to Bangkok this week for a few months for work. We've been together for 6 years but he is a flirt and asian women seem to love him, he's tall, white and a friendly guy...I'm worried about the women in Bangkok, are they really as agressive as people say they are? I'm going to be out of town on business for 1 week and feel nervous to leave him in Bangkok alone,....he loves to party and go to bars, I mean if he's going to cheat, he's going to cheat..but still, am I an idiot for moving to a country where there is more opportunity to? What areas should I avoid? Also are the women really like this? I am stressed out about all this.

Thailand is a great place to find out if you have trust in your relationship,. ,,a lot of men in their own country are faithful, most are too ugly etc to get another woman at home, in thailand it is so easy that even the woman with an ugly spouse has a problem !,..that you fella is good looking etc wont matter, the girls at these bar areas dont discriminate,

[mikethevigoman]

Jeez, if ever I saw a TROLL.

Why? Does people just have too much time on their hand? If you're bored at work why not go check youtube (or did it get blocked by your companys firewall?)

I think you are right phil,. troll

[toptuan]

...a lot of men in their own country are faithful, most are too ugly etc to get another woman at home, in thailand it is so easy...

I am a drop-dead gorgeous male, constantly chased by hoards of western women for over 70 years, but I willingly left my home country to find love in Thailand, at the apparently desirable age of 76.

Edited September 29, 2007 by toptuan

[mikethevigoman]

...a lot of men in their own country are faithful, most are too ugly etc to get another woman at home, in thailand it is so easy...

I am a drop-dead gorgeous male, constantly chased by hoards of western women for over 70 years, but I willingly left my home country to find love in Thailand.

my wife losing our dog was the final straw

[Rajah]

Oh yeah, welcome to another undesirable aspect of Thailand -- white guys who trash white women! Smug in their newfound ability to get laid in the third world, they trash-talk the women who wouldn't give them the time of day at home.

Oh well how terrible men can be. Just hunting for prey and thinking with their you know what... Anyway a man doesn't have a problem with that.

[wasabi]

Oh yeah, welcome to another undesirable aspect of Thailand -- white guys who trash white women! Smug in their newfound ability to get laid in the third world, they trash-talk the women who wouldn't give them the time of day at home.

But for whatever reason, white guys are the subject of much attention by Thai women in Thailand. If some of the sad cases here can be the center of attention, I can imagine that your boyfriend will receive his shares of advances as well.

While I think what you've written is completely accurate I don't think it's as heinous as you make it sound, more so a case of turning the tables. White women in farangland are equally smug in their ability to have constant male attention and hate on less than perfect white guys who simply want to ask them for the time of day. I am no alpha male but do the best I can with what I have and have experienced this smugness for years. I got sick of being put in the pen with a dozen other guys which every girl I was trying to get to know wanted to jab about. I'm sure there are nice white girls out there but the sycophantic, supplicating state of my fellow pussy whipped and starved farang makes said females think they should all act like princesses. Humble and sincere girls are the minority so when they come to Thailand to teach those poor bar girls to make jewelery and save them from the big bad whitey it's time for the grand comeuppance and wake up call. Thai girls don't need bible wielding NGO's to tell them how to deal with a man and yes they are more flirtatious and gregarious but they certainly aren't going to come on to a guy who isn't receptive to the advances. If the OP is sincere based on her description of the behavior of her bf it seems obvious he'll give in to the myriad temptations and as wicked and cynical as I may sound I think he'll be a better man for it. And by the way I don't want my girl to give me a bath I just don't want her to act like her pussy is made of gold.

Edited September 29, 2007 by wasabi

[zaza]

congratulation Gal! you are a single woman again !

Don't worry about the week he will spend alone;am sure he would not have so much in hand!

[alexth]

congratulation Gal! you are a single woman again !

Don't worry about the week he will spend alone;am sure he would not have so much in hand!

I couldn't agree more

[londonthai]

if he feels like seeing go-go girls doesn't mean the relationship has to be over.

however can't fully understand why farang women walk with their husband/boyfriend who is is holding in his other arm the go-go girl - picture which I seen often in Pattaya.

before you leave on the one week business trip maybe you should do some field exercises visiting a go-go bar every evening and allowing your boyfriend to talk to girs there. Maybe he will realise that they are just waste of time.

[lazeeboy]

I may sound crazy, but I am a little worried, my boyfriend and I are moving to Bangkok this week for a few months for work. We've been together for 6 years but he is a flirt and asian women seem to love him, he's tall, white and a friendly guy...I'm worried about the women in Bangkok, are they really as agressive as people say they are? I'm going to be out of town on business for 1 week and feel nervous to leave him in Bangkok alone,....he loves to party and go to bars, I mean if he's going to cheat, he's going to cheat..but still, am I an idiot for moving to a country where there is more opportunity to? What areas should I avoid? Also are the women really like this? I am stressed out about all this.

im sure he will be fine ,there really gentle and discrete

[gregb]

I may sound crazy, but I am a little worried, my boyfriend and I are moving to Bangkok this week for a few months for work. We've been together for 6 years but he is a flirt and asian women seem to love him, he's tall, white and a friendly guy...I'm worried about the women in Bangkok, are they really as agressive as people say they are? I'm going to be out of town on business for 1 week and feel nervous to leave him in Bangkok alone,....he loves to party and go to bars, I mean if he's going to cheat, he's going to cheat..but still, am I an idiot for moving to a country where there is more opportunity to? What areas should I avoid? Also are the women really like this? I am stressed out about all this.

Wow. You'll get lots of answers here, but...

The truth is if you are already this insecure, then this move is a *BIG* mistake. Don't do it. Don't come. Decide now if this relationship is important to you. Really, Thai women aren't aggressive unless you go to areas where that is expected. Your looking at the wrong issue.

The problem is that the *availability* of women, many of whom are drop dead gorgeous, will go up by several orders of magnitude. Where you may have had to worry about 1 women that your boyfriend knew from work back in Farangland, you'll have a hundred to worry about over here. Human emotions what they are, your reaction to this will almost certainly be to try to tighten your grip. It'll be subconscious. That is the big mistake, as all men like the feeling they get over here. All men. Even the ones that don't cheat, absolutely love the attention. It's a biological thing. You can't stop it. When you try and tighten your grip and suppress this, it's bound to cause friction.

Your best hope is to let him come alone so you don't see it. Then you can't get jealous and you won't be able to fall into this self destructive pattern. He may cheat, he might not. It's up to him. But I guarantee that a jealous farang girlfriend will cause problems, and an argument could be all the catalyst he needs to wind up in the bed of another woman.

Either dump him completely, let him come alone and wait for him back in farangland, or do something to get your head on straight. It's not aggressive Thai women who are the threat to your relationship....the threat is jealousy you will feel...and believe me, you will be jealous. I have never met a single, western woman over here who wasn't at some level.

Best of luck. Hope it works out for you.

[CarlBkk]

If any old dull, charmless Mr Average can attract women in Thailand (both paid-for or just for fun/relationship) then a guy who's young, friendly, smart, goodlooking, flirtatious AND who already gets attention from Asian women outside of Asia will find the temptation purely unresistable. Just too easy.

In one sentence and given the info you've given us....don't move here if you care about your relationship.

[soundman]

...a lot of men in their own country are faithful, most are too ugly etc to get another woman at home, in thailand it is so easy...

I am a drop-dead gorgeous male, constantly chased by hoards of western women for over 70 years, but I willingly left my home country to find love in Thailand.

my wife losing our dog was the final straw

Gravity Mike, Gravity!

[alaina]

I've seen healthy relationships survive here and those that fail can do so because of culture shock and other reasons besides other women.

An expat guy I know here is in a relationship A couple of the guys he worked with made it their mission to try take him out to beer bars and get him some "take out." These guys knew that he is in a relationship and considered it sport to try and break it up. He never did end up going with them and not because his GF said so. After a while they were so persistent about it he'd say he was going to meet them somewhere and made excuses about why he didn't show up. That couple just went on to Hong Kong and are now married.

Flirtatiousness can be a problem here. I've been out with foreign guys and yes, some waitresses and cashiers will flirt very heavily with white guys even if you are standing right there. This is very different from what I've observed being out with Thai friends and their foreign boyfriends, girls don't seem to flirt then.

Flirting is not cheating, but it takes two to flirt. Constant flirting in front of you is rude and I'd make sure that if you feel that way, you ask him not to flirt around you. Some people like to flirt and as long as you're not standing there and it's just flirting, why worry about it?

congratulation Gal! you are a single woman again !

Don't worry about the week he will spend alone;am sure he would not have so much in hand! :D

helpful, that is.

[alexth]

if he feels like seeing go-go girls doesn't mean the relationship has to be over.

however can't fully understand why farang women walk with their husband/boyfriend who is is holding in his other arm the go-go girl - picture which I seen often in Pattaya.

before you leave on the one week business trip maybe you should do some field exercises visiting a go-go bar every evening and allowing your boyfriend to talk to girs there. Maybe he will realise that they are just waste of time.

Who said anything about go-go girls?

[ClaytonSeymour]

I may sound crazy, but I am a little worried, my boyfriend and I are moving to Bangkok this week for a few months for work. We've been together for 6 years but he is a flirt and asian women seem to love him, he's tall, white and a friendly guy...I'm worried about the women in Bangkok, are they really as agressive as people say they are? I'm going to be out of town on business for 1 week and feel nervous to leave him in Bangkok alone,....he loves to party and go to bars, I mean if he's going to cheat, he's going to cheat..but still, am I an idiot for moving to a country where there is more opportunity to? What areas should I avoid? Also are the women really like this? I am stressed out about all this.

If this a serious post then you're a fool; letting him loose in Bangkok would be like letting the fox into the chicken run. Nothing more to add.