My Wife Is Thai

[Eastender]

I think many are missing the point with this bank clerk example. Firstly, my wife wasn't with me and looks age etc didn't enter into it. But the main point is, once you use the word 'your', why not follow with 'wife'? Something caused her to hessitate and it's clearly because she wan't sure whether one could refer to a Thai partner as a 'wife'. If people continue not to refer to them as women, it's no wonder some bank clerk hessitates tbefore using the word 'wife'.

I wasn't offended, but did feel the need to point out that whatever part of the world my partner was from it was fine to use the words wife and woman. In fact anything else is just unexpexpected and weird. Can you imagine, "yes we can certainly open a savings account for your lady..."

Look through threads on this website and you will find occasional TV users saying 'Thai lady'. Why? WHY? Why not 'Thai woman' - can someone explain to me this special term reserved purely for females born in Thailand?

[JacknDanny]

I think many are missing the point with this bank clerk example. Firstly, my wife wasn't with me and looks age etc didn't enter into it. But the main point is, once you use the word 'your', why not follow with 'wife'? Something caused her to hessitate and it's clearly because she wan't sure whether one could refer to a Thai partner as a 'wife'. If people continue not to refer to them as women, it's no wonder some bank clerk hessitates tbefore using the word 'wife'.

I wasn't offended, but did feel the need to point out that whatever part of the world my partner was from it was fine to use the words wife and woman. In fact anything else is just unexpexpected and weird. Can you imagine, "yes we can certainly open a savings account for your lady..."

Look through threads on this website and you will find occasional TV users saying 'Thai lady'. Why? WHY? Why not 'Thai woman' - can someone explain to me this special term reserved purely for females born in Thailand?

I think you are looking for things that arent there

If your wife was NOT present, then how can the bank clerk know that your "wife" is a woman. (I dont understand why your wife was not with you if you were opening up a bank account for her )

I actually find the opposite is true here in Thailand.

Most people who I meet when I am with my Girlfriend, refer to her as my Wife, even though I am NOT married.

Much ado about nothing methinks

[CarlBkk]

In the UK when dealing with customers, it is polite to use the term "lady" instead of "woman" every time. If talking about "..that woman" it sounds quite harsh when other customers are listening. Lady is softer and I would say more polite in the context of your example.

Therefore...1 point to the bank clerk, 0 to the eastender.

[Eastender]

Some interesting replies. CarlBKK, yes in certain sentances 'lady' is more polite than 'woman', but have you ever in your life heard someone say 'your lady' instead of the more natural 'your wife'. Imagine me going into the office tomorrow, wanting to be polite to some of my company's best customers, and asking "and how is your lady today"? You're trying to make a point that just doesn't work in this situation.

But back to the original point, does anyone else here use the term 'lady' for female Thais but 'woman' for any other nationality?

[JacknDanny]

Some interesting replies. CarlBKK, yes in certain sentances 'lady' is more polite than 'woman', but have you ever in your life heard someone say 'your lady' instead of the more natural 'your wife'. Imagine me going into the office tomorrow, wanting to be polite to some of my company's best customers, and asking "and how is your lady today"? You're trying to make a point that just doesn't work in this situation.

But back to the original point, does anyone else here use the term 'lady' for female Thais but 'woman' for any other nationality?

I am struggling to get your drift here.

You are married, that being the case your wife has taken your surname.

You go into the bank without her, therefore how does the teller know what nationality she is?

Like I said, You seem to be trying to make something of nothing

[xyborg]

Hang orn.......... Ive got it now is your wife called Emily or Florence??? they're ladies you know,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QMGRNF1Kx8g

[farang prince]

every thai in thailand regards any thai woman with a farang as a prostitute.

people around the world think the same.

who cares what the world thinks anyway?

just find a deserted south seas island and push out them puppies and world be damned!

Wow Thaihigh, you have only made seven posts on Thai Visa and you have already made my Top Ten Ignorant Posters list. Congratulations. Just keep pushing out them stupid comments.

[bobbin]

Eastender

As a life-long native English speaker, I struggle to get your point.

You are definately over-parsing the language here.

[sweetchariot]

I had the same thing, sussed out later that he wasn't sure whether I was her husband or father.

Such is life, the young nit.

Vote for post of the year

And regarding the bank clerk, she knew the person was my wife, she just seemed unsure whether it was correct to say 'your wife' when referring to a Thai person. It's hardly surprising if the average person hears Thai women referred to as ladies, but all other nationalities as women, they may start to wonder if they can refer to a Thai partner with a normal word like 'wife'. To suggest she was being polite is rediclulous, do people ask, "how is your lady and your children".

Never heard this before in my life. You are obviously a bit nuts. Hopefully the mods will close this drivel before I have to start flaming.

[farang prince]

As I said in my original post, why do many use the term 'lady' for a female Thai person, but 'woman' for all other nationalities. I have many farang friends with Thai wives in the UK who do this and it annoys me. It's not at all that I think it's derogatory and I don't think at all it has any roots in prostitution, it's just strange, - like if you started to notice all French men were being reffered to as gentlemen while the rest of the world were just men?

And regarding the bank clerk, she knew the person was my wife, she just seemed unsure whether it was correct to say 'your wife' when referring to a Thai person. It's hardly surprising if the average person hears Thai women referred to as ladies, but all other nationalities as women, they may start to wonder if they can refer to a Thai partner with a normal word like 'wife'. To suggest she was being polite is rediclulous, do people ask, "how is your lady and your children".

Some people take the greatest offense at the least little affront. Wait until someone propositions your "woman" on some street corner or department store. Then your sense of outrage is justified. Otherwise, stop making mountains out of molehills.

[PhilHarries]

As I said in my original post, why do many use the term 'lady' for a female Thai person, but 'woman' for all other nationalities. I have many farang friends with Thai wives in the UK who do this and it annoys me. It's not at all that I think it's derogatory and I don't think at all it has any roots in prostitution, it's just strange, - like if you started to notice all French men were being reffered to as gentlemen while the rest of the world were just men?

And regarding the bank clerk, she knew the person was my wife, she just seemed unsure whether it was correct to say 'your wife' when referring to a Thai person. It's hardly surprising if the average person hears Thai women referred to as ladies, but all other nationalities as women, they may start to wonder if they can refer to a Thai partner with a normal word like 'wife'. To suggest she was being polite is rediclulous, do people ask, "how is your lady and your children".

Incredible how some peoples lives leave them with such trivialities to complain about.

To answer the post I refer to "women" when referring to an undefined group of female people whether thay are western, Asian or American. When it is a specific group and particularly when I am referring to them in person (e.g. the female staff at work) I'll use the term ladies as in "good morning ladies how are you this fine day?" and it won't matter whether thay are Thais, Vietnamese or westerners. Just try substituting "women" for "ladies" in my example and see how it might change the response. I am not in the retailing business but I have never heard a shop, bank or hotel worker using the term "woman" when referring to a female customer. If I was in a retail or service outlet and an employee referred to my partner as "your woman" I'd ask to see the manager so as to suggest some re-education.

It may of course be a reflection of eastender's location in that within that area of London covered by the sounds of the Bow bells anything above slag is considered posh speak.

[blizzard]

sir you do know that these women r very hard on the eyes type, as far as looks go! its not only the men who r less than attractive........l;ol.

[sweetchariot]

So every falang living here has 'bought' a Thai woman?...........hmm.

Do I detect a hint of jealousy as your obvious low socioeconomic status precludes you from visiting our fabled wonderland to discover the truth for yourself, rather than listening to your fellow dropouts in the local, spending your hard earned government benefits?

Edit - to remove potentially flaming comments

Edited January 21, 2008 by Jockstar
to remove quotes.

[sonnyJ]

What's wrong with lady? OP didn't reveal how is the clerk supposed to know she's his wife....

I would be offended though if a nationality or race were included. Such as your Thai lady.

Or.

Yes, your half Thai, half Mexican or maybe just one eight Caucasian or is it Cherokee or both, anyway, lady is very welcomed to open an account here. Please come back again. Thank you.

[mikethevigoman]

every thai in thailand regards any thai woman with a farang as a prostitute.

people around the world think the same.

who cares what the world thinks anyway?

just find a deserted south seas island and push out them puppies and world be damned!

Wow Thaihigh, you have only made seven posts on Thai Visa and you have already made my Top Ten Ignorant Posters list. Congratulations. Just keep pushing out them stupid comments.

yea, worra W

[RueFang]

Something caused her to hessitate and it's clearly because....

she had too much saliva in her mouth and had to swallow before completing her sentence.

In the UK when dealing with customers, it is polite to use the term "lady" instead of "woman" every time. If talking about "..that woman" it sounds quite harsh when other customers are listening. Lady is softer and I would say more polite in the context of your example.

This would be the case in every country, not just the UK.

I am struggling to get your drift here.

You are married, that being the case your wife has taken your surname.

You go into the bank without her, therefore how does the teller know what nationality she is?

Like I said, You seem to be trying to make something of nothing

So, how DID the bank teller know the nationality of your wife?

The OP is being absurd for being so hung up on something so inane.

[twschw]

OP - "But back to the original point, does anyone else here use the term 'lady' for female Thais but 'woman' for any other nationality?"

I don't use Lady just for Thai ladies. If I see a female and want to comment on her I would say " Did you see that lady? Was she American or English?". To say "did you see that woman" sounds harsh and crude. My grandmother would strike me dead from heaven if I ever said "that Thai, Inidian, English or American woman". Just how I was raised I guess.

[TheDon]

Man I think many farangs complain about too much crap, i mean alot of topics is just BS, complaining over spilt milk.

You all must be English, Still crying over the ashes

[meemiathai]

As I said in my original post, why do many use the term 'lady' for a female Thai person, but 'woman' for all other nationalities. I have many farang friends with Thai wives in the UK who do this and it annoys me. It's not at all that I think it's derogatory and I don't think at all it has any roots in prostitution, it's just strange, - like if you started to notice all French men were being reffered to as gentlemen while the rest of the world were just men?

And regarding the bank clerk, she knew the person was my wife, she just seemed unsure whether it was correct to say 'your wife' when referring to a Thai person. It's hardly surprising if the average person hears Thai women referred to as ladies, but all other nationalities as women, they may start to wonder if they can refer to a Thai partner with a normal word like 'wife'. To suggest she was being polite is rediclulous, do people ask, "how is your lady and your children".

I don't understand why you did not simply ask the bank clerk this question.

"Why did you say your lady instead of your wife? Is it because that she is thai?"

Don't you think that is going to answer your question? Go back to the bank and ask.