seonai Posted March 10, 2008 Author Share Posted March 10, 2008 (edited) Hi Naam, I hope I did not sound grumpy. I see what you mean absolutely... Edited March 10, 2008 by seonai Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Naam Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 Hi Naam, I hope I did not sound grumpy. I see what you mean absoltely... you did not sound grumpy at all Seonai. it's the Klingon genetics which make ME always sound grumpy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seonai Posted March 10, 2008 Author Share Posted March 10, 2008 Naam you are so sweet Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jingjok Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 (edited) ...there are a few Thai women and men that can have a decent conversation, lots in fact but it is hard for us to meet them Have you considered that the explanantion may be that they do not really want to meet us? Edited March 10, 2008 by Jingjok Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Austhaied Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 ...there are a few Thai women and men that can have a decent conversation, lots in fact but it is hard for us to meet them Have you considered that the explanantion may be that they do not really want to meet us? And suddenly the "truth" appears. Bingo Jingjok. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Valjean Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 ...there are a few Thai women and men that can have a decent conversation, lots in fact but it is hard for us to meet them Have you considered that the explanantion may be that they do not really want to meet us? I'm not sure if this is meant to imply that the Thai’s referred to here overtly just don’t want to have anything to do with expats. I don’t think that’s true. In fact I think the Thai’s that you might have the most in common with to have a discussion about a range of issue specifically have a lot more exposure via education, work and travel to non-Thai’s. The issue is the same anywhere if you are new. How to meet people? If your goal is just to find Thai’s to have a stimulating conversation with that’s pretty hard to act on. People everywhere have their circle of friends, family and associates and getting inside that is tough. Common interests are important or finding social groups were people are interested in doing just this. You do need to find some common ground – if your goal is to have interesting discussions on US presidential race then that’s probably with American expats. I know of several groups in Bangkok that are Thai & expat that meet to discuss the environment, arts, business, ideas, and other things. They are out there if you use them. The social networking resources now offered but the Internet are huge. You just need to start using them and start participating. Or if you don’t find what you want why not start something? A monthly coffee meet-up for discussions on a topic. The web gives you many ways to connect with likeminded people, expat or Thai. You just need to take the initiative to do it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onzestan Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 Dear Seonai, I don't want to rain on your parade, but might it not be that what you find intellectually stimulating, is completely different from what the majority of the Thai people find stimulating, after all what I find stimulating is defined by where my interests, knowledge, hopes, dreams etc. lie. For example I cannot be bothered with discussing quantum theories, but can go on about maritime transport logistics for hours, (and bore you to death), simply because I know a thing or two about it. Isn't it also that when discussing subjects, we are merely hoping and striving to have our own theories re-enforced, and hoping to find people who think likewise and in doing so feel better about ourselves. - You see !! I was right !! - My 2 cents onzestan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MiG16 Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 I think anywhere can be intellectually stimulating, it does not depend on your location but rather your motivation. exactly. its more a question of who you get to associate with. not where you are. in thailand I constantly had the chance to discuss and engage in conversation with other like-minded individuals who were interested in current affairs or other similar issues. whereas now, not in thailand, I have less of a chance to do so. simply because the people I associate with have different interests. I continue to have the stimulating discussions with friends in other parts of the world through emails though.... so, yes, I dont think the location matters. its what you have access to. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FBN Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 I think anywhere can be intellectually stimulating, it does not depend on your location but rather your motivation. exactly. its more a question of who you get to associate with. not where you are. in thailand I constantly had the chance to discuss and engage in conversation with other like-minded individuals who were interested in current affairs or other similar issues. whereas now, not in thailand, I have less of a chance to do so. simply because the people I associate with have different interests. I continue to have the stimulating discussions with friends in other parts of the world through emails though.... so, yes, I dont think the location matters. its what you have access to. Professionally, I have to deal with "expat failures". International companies post people to remote locations for work. Sometimes the existing screening process fails and the expat has to be repatriated for various reasons. There is no fixed trend but some common findings on analysis. The obvious one; the first time expat. High risk group. Americans fail more than other nationalities (in our assessment group). Theories: (NOT with reference to Americans!!) You not only re-define your coordinates when you relocate, you also have to re-define value systems and a whole range of other sets of references you took for granted "back home". Stimulating conversation, like minded souls, familiar entertainment and the like are easy to come by and taken for granted. Out of this familiar environment, these "comfort zones" need to be re-created and re-defined. Those who are capable, survive and even thrive. For some of us, this is the reason to travel and seek out foreign destinations. It is a challenge to your creativity. A humbling experience but can be rewarding and enriching. Those who thrive, sometimes find themselves not being able to "go back"; another awkward situation. Some "shut down" and only cope. Ten percent fail within the first year. And Yes, Jingjok, you usually don't get to meet Thais from your peer "social group" you mingled with back home. They are out there though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeaceBlondie Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 On a daily basis I don't find that my 'intellect' is stimulated in day to day Thai conversations but in Europe I can find at least one person a day to have a decent chat with and feel that my brain was working as opposed to merely answering the normal questions.I am by no means saying that Thai people are less intelligent (I hope that is clear) but I feel through their educational system they have been exposed to less opportunity than some westerners to think and have opinions. Thais seem to tell us farang that we think too much, which is bad. I suspect the educational system is to blame, along with whatever cultural traits made the schools that way. If folks learn from early age that they cannot change the system, and they should not think about change, they won't discuss it. Many of us farang, on the other hand, chatter endlessly over countless things on which we have no control at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Naam Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 Naam you are so sweet my beloved Old Lady begs to differ Seonai besides that she claims i am completely wrong (she read this topic) and if it wasn't for her stimulation i would have intellectually withered years ago because i prefer to live like a hermit then she locked the door of her den and played loud music joke aside. she made me thinking and up to a certain extent she is right. although she has a few of degrees in breadless arts (among them a Ph.D. in Anthropology ) she is quite knowledgeable, respectively has over the years acquired knowledge in topics which are of interest for me and which i discuss with her on a daily basis. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villagefarang Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 Seems to me that many of you are confusing, being a "social Chatty Cathy" with intellect. A true intellect is not limited or defined by who it can talk to. Introspection is often more enlightening than verbosity and pontification. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xsplat Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 (edited) There are many ways that my mind can remain challenged, in the absence of conversation. One is to rest in the moment minfully - certainly a worthy challenge. Another is through books and internet. Another is by creative writing, and daydreaming about interesting topics that I research. All of that does not change the fact that sometimes I get really deep down itchy for some good interesting company. I suspect that those who make arguments that either deny or put down the importance of the lack of conversation with the locals do so out of the motivation that they want to feel like they fit in, and they want to love the locals, and so don't want to believe negative things about them. Edited March 10, 2008 by xsplat Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xsplat Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 (edited) Duplicate deleted Edited March 10, 2008 by xsplat Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MeaMaximaCulpa Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 This is where I (sadly) have to agree with Naam. If I have read him correctly, he says that you do not rely on external stimuli for your intellect, but you provide it from within. Same as motivation: I can not motivate anyone but myself, but I might arrange for the right environment, for people to motivate themselves... Of course, to learn and grow, you do need help from the outside, but the initiative must always come from within. Or is it just me again...? And why, oh why, do we have to be so bad and shout to each other? Can we not just try to understand what others are saying, and perhaps learn something? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jingjok Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 ...Introspection is often more enlightening than verbosity and pontification. Indeed. But it's not nearly so much fun on a forum Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camerata Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 I know of several groups in Bangkok that are Thai & expat that meet to discuss the environment, arts, business, ideas, and other things. They are out there if you use them. Right. I've been a member of such a group for over a decade. They are definitely out there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamsin Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 Seems to me that many of you are confusing, being a "social Chatty Cathy" with intellect. A true intellect is not limited or defined by who it can talk to. Introspection is often more enlightening than verbosity and pontification. Which you seem to be very good at vf. Bet you're BaF up there aren't you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villagefarang Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 Seems to me that many of you are confusing, being a "social Chatty Cathy" with intellect. A true intellect is not limited or defined by who it can talk to. Introspection is often more enlightening than verbosity and pontification. Which you seem to be very good at vf. Bet you're BaF up there aren't you. OK, I'll bite and show my stupidity. What does BaF mean? I have come up with several possibilities on my own but can't decide which one you meant. I am also having difficulty with what you think I'm good at. The introspection or the pontification stuff? One answer would imply that you have read my blog while the other, I'm not sure. Just an attempt at some intellectual stimulation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ulysses G. Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 Bad Ass Farang? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villagefarang Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 Bad Ass Farang? Thanks UG, that was definitely high on my list of possible meanings but wasn't able to relate it to my personage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villagefarang Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 ...Introspection is often more enlightening than verbosity and pontification. Indeed. But it's not nearly so much fun on a forum I agree with the "fun" part, but I thought we were discussing intellectual stimulation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villagefarang Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 I suspect that those who make arguments that either deny or put down the importance of the lack of conversation with the locals do so out of the motivation that they want to feel like they fit in, and they want to love the locals, and so don't want to believe negative things about them. Most attempts to assign "motivation" to other's statements or actions ends up backfiring and shining more light on oneself, than on others. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seonai Posted March 10, 2008 Author Share Posted March 10, 2008 This is where I (sadly) have to agree with Naam. If I have read him correctly, he says that you do not rely on external stimuli for your intellect, but you provide it from within. Same as motivation: I can not motivate anyone but myself, but I might arrange for the right environment, for people to motivate themselves...Of course, to learn and grow, you do need help from the outside, but the initiative must always come from within. Or is it just me again...? And why, oh why, do we have to be so bad and shout to each other? Can we not just try to understand what others are saying, and perhaps learn something? Disagree that you can 'only motivate yourself' ... my friends and I are always bouncing ideas and theories between each other about a massive range of subjects that motivate each other to make changes or think in new directions Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xsplat Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 I suspect that those who make arguments that either deny or put down the importance of the lack of conversation with the locals do so out of the motivation that they want to feel like they fit in, and they want to love the locals, and so don't want to believe negative things about them. Most attempts to assign "motivation" to other's statements or actions ends up backfiring and shining more light on oneself, than on others. As a student of life I have no problems with being incorrect. I would totally fail though, if I were to assume ignorance altogether. Perhaps most of YOUR attempts to assign motivation fail. I'd not assume that all people understand the various ways of the human condition equally. If I'm wrong, I'm wrong. My guess probably has more insight than you want it to. No? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xsplat Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 (edited) This is where I (sadly) have to agree with Naam. If I have read him correctly, he says that you do not rely on external stimuli for your intellect, but you provide it from within. Same as motivation: I can not motivate anyone but myself, but I might arrange for the right environment, for people to motivate themselves...Of course, to learn and grow, you do need help from the outside, but the initiative must always come from within. Or is it just me again...? And why, oh why, do we have to be so bad and shout to each other? Can we not just try to understand what others are saying, and perhaps learn something? Disagree that you can 'only motivate yourself' ... my friends and I are always bouncing ideas and theories between each other about a massive range of subjects that motivate each other to make changes or think in new directions I've heard it said many times by people in all walks of life, that a creative team that comes from a wide variety of backgrounds is far more powerful than individuals thinking alone, or than a group of folks with the same background. People are social, and thoughts depend on other thoughts - usually other peoples thoughts. Actually, ALWAYS other peoples thoughts - we'd not even know language and concepts if not taught to us. I've even heard the case stated in extreme terms, that being isolated prevents thinking clearly. Edited March 10, 2008 by xsplat Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamsin Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 Seems to me that many of you are confusing, being a "social Chatty Cathy" with intellect. A true intellect is not limited or defined by who it can talk to. Introspection is often more enlightening than verbosity and pontification. Which you seem to be very good at vf. Bet you're BaF up there aren't you. OK, I'll bite and show my stupidity. What does BaF mean? I have come up with several possibilities on my own but can't decide which one you meant. I am also having difficulty with what you think I'm good at. The introspection or the pontification stuff? One answer would imply that you have read my blog while the other, I'm not sure. Just an attempt at some intellectual stimulation . I'm asuminging you are er, American. BoredAsFck. And, yes, I did have the opportunity, nay 'happenstance' of viewing a segment of your blog, and found the bit about the 'model' particularly enlightening as to your character. Hmmmm, let me see, 'and at least the new Thai boyfriend of this beautiful 'model'[/i] showed respect by waiing me. (sic) By the way. Only the local buffalo think you are 'intellectually stimulating'. Or maybe not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villagefarang Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 Seems I must have touched some nerves in a few individuals. I will attempt to refrain from assigning "motivations" to others, need to result to insults. I'm probably too stupid to figure it out anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villagefarang Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 seonai If you have friends who are not controlled by their bias and are truly able to hear and learn from different opinions then you are indeed a lucky person. Group thought and discussion can produce socially acceptable results but seldom leads to groundbreaking new ideas. The ones who come up with the ideas that others follow don't normally get their motivation from support groups who tell them what they want to hear. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seonai Posted March 10, 2008 Author Share Posted March 10, 2008 I am luck VF and if it's not too big headed, like attracts like Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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