The Hose Beside The Toilet

[Rinrada]

With respect....Get your kit off.....its the only way

[Totster]

With respect....Get your kit off.....its the only way

Yep... done that... not always practical though...

totster

[Santini]

When I go back to America, land of toilet paper, I really miss my butt squirter. If possible, I'll sit on the sink and clean with water.

Fabulous

[DJ Pat]

If you wipe a wet bum with this toilet paper, then it disintegrates all over your bum

Any suggestions?

Yes. Don't buy Cellox paper in future, try Scott.

[Insight]

Clear evidence that this forum saves lives.

[Gazza]

I havn't used this hose-thingy yet, but I do have one concern.

(How can I explain this delicate problem?)

If you clean your bum with the hose, then you are left with a dripping wet bum. So you then have to dry it with toilet paper. But the paper we use is the self-destructing type due to the puny waste system in our appartment block. If you wipe a wet bum with this toilet paper, then it disintegrates all over your bum

Any suggestions?

Use the drip dry method or.....SHAKE THAT BOOTY!!!

[dr_Pat_Pong]

I havn't used this hose-thingy yet, but I do have one concern.

(How can I explain this delicate problem?)

If you clean your bum with the hose, then you are left with a dripping wet bum.  So you then have to dry it with toilet paper.  But the paper we use is the self-destructing type due to the puny waste system in our appartment block.  If you wipe a wet bum with this toilet paper, then it disintegrates all over your bum 

Any suggestions?

Use the drip dry method or.....SHAKE THAT BOOTY!!!

Toilet humor gets the membership going every time. The psychiatrists would have a field day hereabouts.

[Up2U]

I'm a great fan of the 'Capt. Kirk doofer' and feel slightly unclean when forced to resort to tissue only in the UK. 

That's so right...

I tell you one problem I do have though, when I visit somewhere that only has the "hole in the floor" type toilet (I think I mean the Squat type) and instead of the hose and nozzle you get "bowl and water butt" (like at my gf's house).... I ALWAYS get in such a mess with those things, water everywhere... well I'm not gonna explain the rest, there must be a technique....

totster

That's why you don't use the left hand for eating

Middle East still uses a sort of watering can in most places, plus left hand. (Remember to trim your fingernails, especially if you suffer from piles )

[RDN]

... (Remember to trim your fingernails, especially if you suffer from piles    )

Oh dear, I was going to have breakfast, but don't feel like it now How do I de-register from this thread...

[LadyinRed]

I love those bum squirts - but not the one I have at home.

The pressure is so strong it could blow me another 8rsehole

[Rinrada]

Read a little article once about a German guy(no nationalist crit. intended)who got stuck in one of the "squat bogs"

Usual thing he was a tourist on hols and got fasinated with the idea (like most here)and decided to give it a go.

Unfortunately at the end of the "deed" he was performing his "apres toilet "with the hose and missed his aim,slipped and fell backwards and got stuck in the hole.

Being a slightly large block...read fat he just couldnt move but worse of all the hose pipe had got jamed in the pan and was on full pressure flushing his jacksie until he got hauled out ..........about 2 hours later.

He couldnt speak any Thai so noboby knew what the ###### he was shouting about.

Anyway he was finally realeased and with a bit of a red face but at least he probabally had the cleanest erse in Thailand.

[Goat Roper]

That hose pipe is a much cleaner and better deal than an old "skidmarked" crusty community muslin toilet rag used in Jordan and other places in the mid-east. Yea, give me the hosepipe anytime.

[Gazza]

Toilet humor gets the membership going every time. The psychiatrists would have a field day hereabouts.

Sod the <deleted>' psychologists. You can't win either way with them dirty pervs. If you like toilet humour they'll classify you with some unspellable <deleted>' Greek complex or something. If you don't then you're probably delusional, allusional or some other bloody 'usional' or whatever.

[Padkapow Guy]

I thought those squirters were for putting out the flames after eating the hot thai food.

[Stocky]

That hose pipe is a much cleaner and better deal than an old "skidmarked" crusty community muslin toilet rag used in Jordan and other places in the mid-east. Yea, give me the hosepipe anytime.

The times I've been in Dubai the crappers are invariably equipped with the ol' Captain Kirk doofer, not only that but it usually zaps you with hot water!

I've no complaints.

......That said, there's nothing quite like a cold blast to calm the 'Emma Freuds' on a hot day!

[wolf5370]

They're for washing your hair. Head over ceramic bowl, spray gun for fast removal of shampoo.

Use it to wash the bathroom floor.

[Wolfie]

I havn't used this hose-thingy yet, but I do have one concern.

(How can I explain this delicate problem?)

If you clean your bum with the hose, then you are left with a dripping wet bum.  So you then have to dry it with toilet paper.  But the paper we use is the self-destructing type due to the puny waste system in our appartment block.  If you wipe a wet bum with this toilet paper, then it disintegrates all over your bum 

Any suggestions?

Use the drip dry method or.....SHAKE THAT BOOTY!!!

Toilet humor gets the membership going every time. The psychiatrists would have a field day hereabouts.

Nothing wrong with toilet humour mate... its what we strive on.. us farang

[Rinrada]

And dont forget the dog.

After a hard day out walking with the mutt chasing buffalo and things you find its all mankie,smelly,honky etc (dog that is) so you get it back into the dunny for a good washdown ...great.

Also if you "appen find that its eaten something a bit off...rotten cat or something and got the trots...no problem just yank up it tail and give a good blast from your pipe.

In fact....no thats its ...sort of bonding procedure...man and beast together in the can sloshing out each others......em

[penzman]

You`ll find more info on the subject on this link as well

http://www.thaivisa.com/forum/index.php?sh...e+over+the+wipe

[Team Bukowski]

hahaha..I can't believe this thread is still going.

[Gazza]

They're pretty useful on the end of a very long hose for washing my bikes. Helps to save a bit of water too.

[wolf5370]

They're pretty useful on the end of a very long hose for washing my bikes. Helps to save a bit of water too. 

How's it save water? Do you wash your butt at the same time?

[RDN]

They're pretty useful on the end of a very long hose for washing my bikes. Helps to save a bit of water too. 

How's it save water? Do you wash your butt at the same time?

555555555555555555 Please remove this mental image from my brain....

[Gazza]

They're pretty useful on the end of a very long hose for washing my bikes. Helps to save a bit of water too. 

How's it save water? Do you wash your butt at the same time?

I've got a big bike with too much chrome so I have clean it in sections. Front end then tank and engine and then the back end. So instead of leaving the water flowing and going to waste I just pick up the gun and squirt away when needed.

[dr_Pat_Pong]

They're pretty useful on the end of a very long hose for washing my bikes. Helps to save a bit of water too. 

How's it save water? Do you wash your butt at the same time?

Sits on the bike and benefits from the overflow.