How Do You Feel When Someone Criticises Your Country?

[ade100]

It seems to hit at the heart when someone criticises our home country.

Personally I have not lived in the country I grew up in for over ten years. If someone criticises it, I might agree at first but after a while I have no choice but to defend it.

I know many Thai/Western couples were this is a problem. Could be either way round, but if we voice criticism of a person's country it seems certain to cause an emotional reaction (even if they actually agree with the criticism).

So how should we behave in a cross-cultural relationship? Is it best to keep quiet when we feel annoyed by something in our partner's country? Do we pretend their country is wonderful? Or maybe that's what forums like TV are for – give people an outlet for their frustration so they can keep it out of their relationship.

How do you feel when someone launches into criticism of your home country?

[JimsKnight]

If what they are criticising is a valid and fair point on something that is wrong I'd probably agree wholeheartedly and consider ways to come to 'common ground' on it if it was a 'necessary evil'.

[Travel2003]

Guess it depends of what kind of criticism.

If someone criticises my home country in a constructive way.

No problem. Go ahead and slam it, if it deserves so.

Comments like "everybody from your country are a...holes", I just ignore.

But then again, this is indeed a Forum where we talk mostly about Thailand, thus anyone that likes to criticise it should be allowed to do so.

Again, as long as it is done within the rules.

[ilyushin]

Always bitching about the States, but the Thais seem to love the place (US) more than me. I appreciate the US, but don't side with the politics and most of the folks over there. If you understand Thai, you'll hear lots of them put the local system down so it all seems fair, right? We both complain as would normal people about normal issues to complain about.

Beer injection just kicked-in!

Edited May 8, 2008 by ilyushin

[hanibal7]

After living in pattaya for 5 years i find it realy strange when some one says if you dont like the place go.i can critisise my own country and not expect hassle so why not here.even the moderators warn people of their views.if i feel the police are mafia i will say so,the same as ripoff baht bus drivers.

thailand is not milk and honey

thailand is drug infested

thailand can be dangerous

i looooooooooooooove it though lol.

would never go back to england to live,too many thais there lol lol lol.

[Sir Burr]

Yeah, just wondering what the "This is Thailand, you must adapt to their way" brigade think about Thaksin wanting the Manchester City football team to bow to him?

[kopite]

couldnt give a monkeys. i hate the UK with a passion. always have, always will. the food, weather, the people. the only thing that gives me the hump is when someone says something about my football team

i hate it when people have a dig at Thailand though

[zaphodbeeblebrox]

Dubya ruined my country. Almost all people outside the U.S. recognize this and a majority of U.S. residents do as well. I just hope his predecessor can repair some of the damage.

[deathstardan]

Dubya ruined my country. Almost all people outside the U.S. recognize this and a majority of U.S. residents do as well. I just hope his predecessor can repair some of the damage.

Who, Bill Clinton.....

[qwertz]

As a Brit living in Germany I don't feel anything when someone criticises England.

They're usually quoting the reasons why I left anyway.

[justcruisin]

If someone criticises your country....have they been/lived there?

For most Thai's they would not have a clue about anything outside their Mooban,but are fiercely patriotic like a lot of us falangs,myself I could'nt give a rats about anything that happens in Australia as my home is here and will be here forever.

Why does it matter about election results etc in home countries where every facet of your life is controlled by goverment policy and you choose to leave that enviroment?

[dee123]

...UK is crap,weather,yob culture,miserable people(like myself) expensive,no social life,too many rules etc but we have a free fairly good democracy with press freedom so that makes up for all the bad bits,....critisise UK but not our freedom...

[TheDon]

It depends on how you do it. many things wrong with Thailand, but putting the country and the people down in front of our wife is bad

[dee123]

....I don't start saying the things I say on Thaivisa to my wife ,...if I did I'd get "WOK"ed....OUCH!!...seriously though places like this weboard is the ideal place to "protest"....non violent...right of reply,...although would like 100% non censorship apart from agressive ,threatening, ect

Edited May 8, 2008 by dee123

[aries27]

it depends. if the criticism or comment is valid, i probably would even agree.

but if it comes from someone who is criticizing based on shallow knowledge, stereotypes, or even as a result of a bad experience with a countryman or the country itself and then generalizing it, i don't have second thoughts correcting the impression.

in the same way that when i see something good/admirable in a country not mine, i say it...

[dee123]

...Thats fair ,..so you will join me in critisizing double pricing,sinsod,corruption in police and lack of press freedom in Thailand ?

Edited May 8, 2008 by dee123

[distortedlink]

I was born in London, England considered myself a true Londoner and years ago, there was no other place I wanted to be. But during the mid 1970s the London which I grew up in, disappeared and so did much of the rest of England, changed beyond all recognition.

For me, England has become a complete dump and even though I am a true patriot, I prefer to be patriotic from afar. I suppose if a foreigner was to slag off certain things about my country to me, I would get wound up, especially if it involved the Queen. Gould bless sa.

Nevertheless, the real test of loyalties to the old country is, if Thailand was to go to war with your home country, who would you fight for? In any sport, Thailand Vs Home country, who do you support? If the Thai government offered a Thai passport on condition that the home country citizenship is completely given up, would you accept it?

Like to see some replies to this, just out of interest.

Edited May 8, 2008 by distortedlink

[jukapot]

What other people say or do is is their business - not mine. My business is what I say and do. It certainly is not my business to correct what others are saying. I would just walk away.

My country’s honor is not at stake because what others might say, but rather how I conduct myself.

[GuestHouse]

People will and can say what they like - rather than get upset about what they say, it's usually worth listening to exactly what its they are saying. This is particularly so with expatriates berating the old country. As with much of what people say, and what they are telling you may, what is revealed may not be what is intended to be revealed.

There is often a message between the line in which, while berating what they perceive to be the problems of the old county they reveal something of themselves and their own problems.

Well balanced people usually hold well balanced views.....

Edited May 8, 2008 by GuestHouse

[dee123]

ooh dear gue st house is here!!...sorry old chum Its time for my horlicks goodnight....

Edited May 8, 2008 by dee123

[BEENTHEREDONETHAT]

I haven't live in my home country for over 20 years and have only been back once in the last nine years. Wasn't to impressed last time I was there.

When people criticize it, it depends on how they do it. If they say George W. is a a$$hole, I agree. If they say all americans are a$$holes I get a bit upset. But I thinnk that is true of any country you can't lump all the people in to one category. Well the exception to that would be Thai drivers. They should all be lumped.

For the most part I don't feel like a expert on the US since I have spent so little time there since I retired "1984". Would not mind going back for a few months on holiday but I don't think I would want to live there full time. The taxes, medical cost and masses of paperwork tend to put me off. Even if I had to leave Thailand for some reason, I would have to think long and hard as to where I would live. Then after all that thinking I would ask my wife where we were going to live and that would probably be it.

I probably get just as annoyed when someone criticizes Australia as I do the US. Since I've spent most of the last 20 years in Oz I became rather fond of it. Curious to see if I feel the same about Thailand after 20 years.

[aries27]

i made a poor judgment in posting a GW bush joke on the farang pub. i regretted it. i dont think it is right to bash one country or its people without being provoked. if i was with a group of americans bashing their president, i could probably join in and say my two cents worth. i think that would be proper. i dont know why i posted that joke... for a split second, i probably thought i was american...hahaha. sorry yankee guys...

Edited May 8, 2008 by aries27

[Bagwan]

I was born free. My country made sacrifices to preserve my freedoms - and those of other countries. (France please note). I intend staying free. I would be cheating those who have perished or been maimed in past conflicts to do otherwise. Others will have to live with that.

That said, a degree of diplomacy is necessary if one is to put a viewpoint across, particularly in Thailand. When having a bitch about LoS I always make the point that I am on the side of the majority of Thais. I want them to have decent hospitals and medical care, I want them to have good schools with educated, intelligent, professional teachers, I want them to be free of oppression by ALL the authorities, I want them to have job security and some money in their pockets, I want them to have efficient, honest government, I want them to have career opportunities, I want them to live in an environment free from fear, I want them to live in hope and have expectations, I want them to have the freedom and mental processes to be able to think for themselves - shall I go on? That is why I often say the things that I do, because I care for them. The opposite of love isn't hate; it is indifference. I hope that I can galvanise some into fighting for their freedom by criticism that must of necessity be constructive.

Alas, Voltaire's stricture has little currency in Thailand.

[jimmi]

I often here people critising my country, and sometimes it's me. No country is perfect. Does not bother my at all.

[retirednavyman]

Well, for me it would come down to whether the criticism was constructive or not. If someone was talking trash about my country without any basis or foundation, I would still keep my cool and walk away.

There are plenty of people out there just ready to talk smack about a country they know nothing about which smacks of stereotyping

[Pepe']

i made a poor judgment in posting a GW bush joke on the farang pub. i regretted it. i dont think it is right to bash one country or its people without being provoked. if i was with a group of americans bashing their president, i could probably join in and say my two cents worth. i think that would be proper. i dont know why i posted that joke... for a split second, i probably thought i was american...hahaha. sorry yankee guys...

==========

Poor judgement?

Looks like a pattern developing...

[garro]

I come from Ireland but moved to England when I was seventeen and lived there for over a decade. During that time I would constantly hear criticism about my country, but I became accustomed to not taking it too seriously. The majority of these people were critical because of a political situation that they did not understand. I didn't become offended because I know that deep down most English people are fair-minded, once they get to know you, and most are not that bothered with politics.

In Thailand it is easier because 99% of Thai people have never heard of Ireland. The usual reply is "Iceland very cold".

Edited May 8, 2008 by garro

[Pepe']

They'd probably be mostly correct, I guess...

[MengWan]

"Criticizing your country" ...

I do not understand this shortcut, if indeed someone is criticizing the whole country, then it is stupid so I simply raise shoulders and stop listening !

If someone raises certain aspects of life or culture in (one of) "my" country of origin, then I react differently if I agree or not, before engaging in a discussion about the point ...

There are a lot of things to be "criticized" everywhere, sometimes it is simply misunderstandings, and, being a "dumb pacifist", I still live with the idea of "peace for the people(s)".

Generally, one says "no" by moving head from left to right, there are some cultures where it means "yes", one could easily criticize that, it is better to know about it and understand.

[grtaylor]

They're usually quoting the reasons why I left anyway.

Yes!!!