Shop Girls In Samui

[poshthai]

But do these English women you allude to have multiple men sending them money each month

Sending money, or maybe buying loads of drinks for them at night.Or big expensive emals and a anice dress etc etc etc.I knew many ladies from the uk who went out at night with hardly any money and cajoled guys into buying them drinks.

same same

[rixalex]

Rixalex,

In Thailand it is common to show respect by giving a little present/envelop/money. And they all have problems with money because the salary is very unfair.

What absurd nonsense. It's a surprise you can even spell the word "respect" to be honest.

What you want?

Why should a shop girl date a farang on a regular basis? The common reason is: Need for money. Even we talk about the Chaweng scene we are not in Europe, a Thai would not date a farang who is coming here for holidays if there is no need for money.

Mark,

we all know the horror stories about bar girl relationsship.

But statements like

"A few home truths: The Thai ladies, be they in whatever work here on Samui, tend to be a bit loose with the truth on various matters. Not that they all lie all the time, but you ought to maintain a healthy skepticism."

might be true for the beer bar world in Chaweng, Lamai or Pattaya or Phuket or Soi Nana but are not at all valid for the real thai world. Thais -whatever the gender is- are honnest, extremly helpful and goodwilling with foreigners. Nobody in Germany would look for a wife / girlfriend on St. Pauli, famous redlight district in Hamburg!

You continue to confuse me Claude with your contradictory comments. Perhaps it's just the language?

[poshthai]

CLAUDE

Come on be BIG boy and admit you have been burnt by a shopworker lol.

Be THAI and speak the truth,then move on in your life.

[poshthai]

CLAUDE

I dont think many westerners would go in a red light area for marriage,they go for one thing only,and many thai workers do not want a relationship,they are earning too much money.With sponsor money and sex for cash,many women here are earning min80,000-100,000 a month so why do the real professionals want an husband,probably already got a thai one.

[koheesti]

But do these English women you allude to have multiple men sending them money each month

Sending money, or maybe buying loads of drinks for them at night.Or big expensive emals and a anice dress etc etc etc.I knew many ladies from the uk who went out at night with hardly any money and cajoled guys into buying them drinks.

same same

Buying a women 2-3 drinks in order to get her in bed that evening is A LOT DIFFERENT than sending her $500/month because you think you have a future together. I use that amount because I know a guy here who found out his "girlfriend" had been getting money each month from more than one guy. One of the guys has been sending her $500/month (since last summer).

I get angry with the scammers but also the naive guys who get scammed. Face it, the scam is popular in Thailand BECAUSE IT WORKS. There are always plenty of guys dumb enough to send their money to a chick they've just met.

[mssabai]

The teachers I know in Samui earn 10k max a month, but would never have dreamed of supplementing their incomes by getting 'pocket money' from a farang. Blaming it on low income is lazy. They certainly found some farangs attractive but their circles never ran into them in a social context. A night out is hot pan with the girls and very rarely maybe half a bottle of Spy - never Green Mango!!

[poshthai]

KOHEESTI.

one will bed the lady far cheaper than thailand lol.Was only trying to make the point there are similarities with thai and westerner,with the end resul as a one night stand.The post from before was trying to say was are farangs upset because the lady has been paid for sex or that she has had many sex partners,with maybe the odd one free because i certainly have had free sex at times(before my gf of 5 years).Most of my younger friends have come to Pattaya and been with different ladies and not paid.

[ClaudeFeller]

CLAUDE

Come on be BIG boy and admit you have been burnt by a shopworker lol.

Be THAI and speak the truth,then move on in your life.

To stop this kind of childish posts:

The topic is a "fall in love in chaweng" story.

My beloved wife was a "shop girl" in Chaweng, we live in Nathon where she comes from and we are happy with our three kids.

Indeed, there are succesful stories even in the chanweng surrounding, I personally know about ten of them.

[Mark Wolfe]

Mark,

we all know the horror stories about bar girl relationsship.

But statements like

"A few home truths: The Thai ladies, be they in whatever work here on Samui, tend to be a bit loose with the truth on various matters. Not that they all lie all the time, but you ought to maintain a healthy skepticism."

might be true for the beer bar world in Chaweng, Lamai or Pattaya or Phuket or Soi Nana but are not at all valid for the real thai world. Thais -whatever the gender is- are honnest, extremly helpful and goodwilling with foreigners. Nobody in Germany would look for a wife / girlfriend on St. Pauli, famous redlight district in Hamburg! (But so why do so many Germans look for a girlfriend/wife in Samui, the hotbed of rent-a-girlfriend/wife?)

I'm sorry, I did specifically say "on Samui." Did you skim over that part?

The gentleman in question was referring to a Samui girl.

Luxecat:

I do know she is definitely not a total golddigger though. Never pushed me to fancy restaurants, or gold shops, or shopping trips.

This is the kind of thinking that gets you in trouble. It's like saying that David Copperfield definitely make the Statue of Liberty disappear because you saw it on TV. While it may be true what you think, remember this: all the girls I have spoken with are very much against coming out and asking to be taken to fancy restaurants, gold shops or shopping trips (beyond what is normal or in a joking manner). I have often told girls to be more forward with me if they think that they are ripe for sending money after they return to their home country, but all of them tell me that although it is acceptable to sort of make some subtle suggestions, coming right out and making it clear isn't an option. I always tell them it's the Santa thing: if you ask for nothing, that's exactly what you may get.

I think, Lux, that you have to appreciate the fact that the women here are craftier than you might think. (And I am not prepared to go into the "Well, all men lavish gifts on women everywhere in the world" tack in an attempt to ameliorate the differences between Thai women on Samui and those in other parts of the world.)

And I never repost someone else's stuff, but this post needs to be emphasized:

koheesti:

Buying a women 2-3 drinks in order to get her in bed that evening is A LOT DIFFERENT than sending her $500/month because you think you have a future together. I use that amount because I know a guy here who found out his "girlfriend" had been getting money each month from more than one guy. One of the guys has been sending her $500/month (since last summer).

I get angry with the scammers but also the naive guys who get scammed. Face it, the scam is popular in Thailand BECAUSE IT WORKS. There are always plenty of guys dumb enough to send their money to a chick they've just met.

Westerners are basically unequipped emotionally to deal with the "instant babe girlfriend syndrome." Either you come in well prepared after research and are very wary until you get your Thai girl-grifter legs, or you let yourself be taken enough to get over the hump of the learning curve. Some things you just have to go through to fully appreciate. If the bait on the hook tastes good, and you know it's a lure, fine. Just don't swallow the line and sinker too.

Two years ago

Lady: "From what you've told me, this Thai lady is playing you like a fiddle."

Mark: "Yes, I know...but I LOVE the music!"

...and when it was over, I picked myself up, dusted myself off and started all over again (but without the gullibility).

[rixalex]

Mark,

we all know the horror stories about bar girl relationsship.

But statements like

"A few home truths: The Thai ladies, be they in whatever work here on Samui, tend to be a bit loose with the truth on various matters. Not that they all lie all the time, but you ought to maintain a healthy skepticism."

might be true for the beer bar world in Chaweng, Lamai or Pattaya or Phuket or Soi Nana but are not at all valid for the real thai world. Thais -whatever the gender is- are honnest, extremly helpful and goodwilling with foreigners. Nobody in Germany would look for a wife / girlfriend on St. Pauli, famous redlight district in Hamburg! (But so why do so many Germans look for a girlfriend/wife in Samui, the hotbed of rent-a-girlfriend/wife?)

I'm sorry, I did specifically say "on Samui." Did you skim over that part?

The gentleman in question was referring to a Samui girl.

Luxecat:

I do know she is definitely not a total golddigger though. Never pushed me to fancy restaurants, or gold shops, or shopping trips.

This is the kind of thinking that gets you in trouble. It's like saying that David Copperfield definitely make the Statue of Liberty disappear because you saw it on TV. While it may be true what you think, remember this: all the girls I have spoken with are very much against coming out and asking to be taken to fancy restaurants, gold shops or shopping trips (beyond what is normal or in a joking manner). I have often told girls to be more forward with me if they think that they are ripe for sending money after they return to their home country, but all of them tell me that although it is acceptable to sort of make some subtle suggestions, coming right out and making it clear isn't an option. I always tell them it's the Santa thing: if you ask for nothing, that's exactly what you may get.

I think, Lux, that you have to appreciate the fact that the women here are craftier than you might think. (And I am not prepared to go into the "Well, all men lavish gifts on women everywhere in the world" tack in an attempt to ameliorate the differences between Thai women on Samui and those in other parts of the world.)

And I never repost someone else's stuff, but this post needs to be emphasized:

koheesti:

Buying a women 2-3 drinks in order to get her in bed that evening is A LOT DIFFERENT than sending her $500/month because you think you have a future together. I use that amount because I know a guy here who found out his "girlfriend" had been getting money each month from more than one guy. One of the guys has been sending her $500/month (since last summer).

I get angry with the scammers but also the naive guys who get scammed. Face it, the scam is popular in Thailand BECAUSE IT WORKS. There are always plenty of guys dumb enough to send their money to a chick they've just met.

Westerners are basically unequipped emotionally to deal with the "instant babe girlfriend syndrome." Either you come in well prepared after research and are very wary until you get your Thai girl-grifter legs, or you let yourself be taken enough to get over the hump of the learning curve. Some things you just have to go through to fully appreciate. If the bait on the hook tastes good, and you know it's a lure, fine. Just don't swallow the line and sinker too.

Two years ago

Lady: "From what you've told me, this Thai lady is playing you like a fiddle."

Mark: "Yes, I know...but I LOVE the music!"

...and when it was over, I picked myself up, dusted myself off and started all over again (but without the gullibility).

You speak a lot of sense Mark, and your point about girls going for the subtle approach is bang on the money. So many guys seem to think for some reason that the girls aren't smart enough or cunning enough to employ such tactics, but they grossly and sadly under-estimate.

[ClaudeFeller]

KOHEESTI.

one will bed the lady far cheaper than thailand lol.Was only trying to make the point there are similarities with thai and westerner,with the end resul as a one night stand.The post from before was trying to say was are farangs upset because the lady has been paid for sex or that she has had many sex partners,with maybe the odd one free because i certainly have had free sex at times(before my gf of 5 years).Most of my younger friends have come to Pattaya and been with different ladies and not paid.

[frankman]

Easy to get the girl out of the bar"shop" , but not so, to get the bar"shop" out of the girl.

What do you think?

But I must say, there are a few good working relationships around. A few. Wich is nice. Mistakes are made to learn from them. And you only know if you try. good luck!

Edited July 10, 2008 by frankman

[SamuiJens]

To answer the op, it's hard to trust a "Samui" girl if her parents arn't from her and well off, and remember there are a lot of guys that come here alone and the girls know this, that they'll be going back in a month or two, so I can understand the girl, be it shop/bar is out to make a living and not play house with a "rich" farang. I wouldn't send money, but up to you! As for some of the girls being NOT that way, well there are some like any other country in the world. Just as some have said, beware, and don't loose your heart. NOT always simple but easy to do IMO.

[emmezeta]

KOHEESTI.

one will bed the lady far cheaper than thailand lol.Was only trying to make the point there are similarities with thai and westerner,with the end resul as a one night stand.The post from before was trying to say was are farangs upset because the lady has been paid for sex or that she has had many sex partners,with maybe the odd one free because i certainly have had free sex at times(before my gf of 5 years).Most of my younger friends have come to Pattaya and been with different ladies and not paid.

Yes, all europeans guy should learn to pay less, at least....

Please do not ruin the area .....

[BusyBee123]

Stay away from any tourist resort if you really want to find a good thai girl imo. Many farang get over inflated egos with the attention a thai pro gives them, even to the extent they think they are good looking and are nice, amazing.

[britmaveric]

I thought all farang were handsum/nice?

[Michelle1975]

I have asked my thai husband and he said "shop girls are like prostitutes but more expensive". There you go.

Are you thinking about marrying her or why do you want to know her intention? What exactly ist your intention?

[sbk]

Wow, nice. I personally have never thought that and suggest that perhaps treating them like human beings is perhaps a better course of action. At least, for me it is.

[Boo]

wow indeed, people got some strange ideas for sure.

[Shotime]

At least try to treat them as more expensive human beings.

[dotcom]

To answer the op, it's hard to trust a "Samui" girl if her parents arn't from her and well off, and remember there are a lot of guys that come here alone and the girls know this, that they'll be going back in a month or two, so I can understand the girl, be it shop/bar is out to make a living and not play house with a "rich" farang. I wouldn't send money, but up to you! As for some of the girls being NOT that way, well there are some like any other country in the world. Just as some have said, beware, and don't loose your heart. NOT always simple but easy to do IMO.

I'm liking your Leon Russel avatar. Well done!!!

[Mark Wolfe]

At least try to treat them as more expensive human beings.

Brilliant!

I would ask SBK to ask her hubby on this one, but having lived the hayseed life for so long on Phangan (and then came electricity all the time!), I think her husband wouldn't have the slightest idea on the matter. More to the point is that they were not only isolated for the past 19 years or more, he wouldn't have been exposed to such intracacies as bar ladies and shop girls on the game.

Having said that, are there people out there who are Thai and are in a position to be familiar with this? What is the Thai angle on this?

I have heard, and correct me if I am very wrong here, that even the Thai men are expected to "pay" for the girl of his dreams.

I was watching a Thai music video the other day about a young couple wanting to marry, but the girl's father wouldn't have it...so the man and his mother came up with the idea of putting a price tag on all the stuff that the girl would get (household items) when she married this man. They then came to the girl's house with all the stuff on a cart with big price stickers on it, and the man surveyed it and agreed to the marriage.

Perhaps you've seen the video?

[markuk]

Rixalex,

In Thailand it is common to show respect by giving a little present/envelop/money. And they all have problems with money because the salary is very unfair.

my salary is also "unfair" any fellow BM's want to send me some

[SamuiJens]

Rixalex,

In Thailand it is common to show respect by giving a little present/envelop/money. And they all have problems with money because the salary is very unfair.

my salary is also "unfair" any fellow BM's want to send me some

NO! mark, you NOT a girl!-

[ClaudeFeller]

You smart guys MARK.. & JENS out there:

A salary of 5-6.000 THB a month for 10 hours a day, one day off a week and maybe one week off a year is UNFAIR and that is surely the right word. Why "shop girls" and whoever are dating sweating, beer smelling, fat, ugly, red skinned farangs?

Any comments?

[sbk]

At least try to treat them as more expensive human beings.

Brilliant!

I would ask SBK to ask her hubby on this one, but having lived the hayseed life for so long on Phangan (and then came electricity all the time!), I think her husband wouldn't have the slightest idea on the matter. More to the point is that they were not only isolated for the past 19 years or more, he wouldn't have been exposed to such intracacies as bar ladies and shop girls on the game.

Having said that, are there people out there who are Thai and are in a position to be familiar with this? What is the Thai angle on this?

I have heard, and correct me if I am very wrong here, that even the Thai men are expected to "pay" for the girl of his dreams.

I was watching a Thai music video the other day about a young couple wanting to marry, but the girl's father wouldn't have it...so the man and his mother came up with the idea of putting a price tag on all the stuff that the girl would get (household items) when she married this man. They then came to the girl's house with all the stuff on a cart with big price stickers on it, and the man surveyed it and agreed to the marriage.

Perhaps you've seen the video?

If your misconceptions make you happy, Mark, by all means surmise all you want.

[SamuiJens]

You smart guys MARK.. & JENS out there:

A salary of 5-6.000 THB a month for 10 hours a day, one day off a week and maybe one week off a year is UNFAIR and that is surely the right word. Why "shop girls" and whoever are dating sweating, beer smelling, fat, ugly, red skinned farangs?

Any comments?

Yeah, as you are refering in part to me, I'm NOT a fat, sweaty, beer swelling ugly red skinned farang Claude. And I replyed to a stupid remark, by a unknown poster to me. I don't put down the shop girls, I know many women that are real ppl, but have to make ends meet, but I wouldn't personaly send a one night (or more) stand, money from another place unless I'm "sure" there's a good reason for it. The good lookers have (many I know) more than 3-4 farangs sending them money with a little help from themselves. Claude, I think you know what I mean! You don't know me, I don't drink alchol or use bar/shp girls like so many, but know them as neigbors or friends of friends. So please Claude don't jump on my back!

Have a nice day

Jens

[Mark Wolfe]

If your misconceptions make you happy, Mark, by all means surmise all you want.

Oh, from your posts I gathered that you lived in a place that was not heavily trafficked and not a place with many bargirls/shop girls around. I guess I was wrong and your husband does know about shop girls and being on the game... so I put the question to you, what does your Thai husband say on this issue?

[SamuiJens]

If your misconceptions make you happy, Mark, by all means surmise all you want.

Oh, from your posts I gathered that you lived in a place that was not heavily trafficked and not a place with many bargirls/shop girls around. I guess I was wrong and your husband does know about shop girls and being on the game... so I put the question to you, what does your Thai husband say on this issue?

Man, Mark, you love to start trouble in many of your posts, is the reason here that you can't find a real woman????Must be your additude, just my opinon, but ask others here on tv. maybe it's just me that thinks this way about your posts!?!

Edited July 24, 2008 by SamuiJens

[tracer]

Good info Khun Jean. I thought if she worked in a shop then she wasn't a prostitute. However, I don't think she was ever a bargirl. I met her at 21. She's now 26. As I said she had always worked with her couisin since she was nineteen. Her cousin verified that without her around one day. No need to lie on that because it was just a general conversation. But what concerned me was, that after all those many years, my girls cousin fired her. That was the job she lost that i sent her money for. By the way her cousins mom, and my girls mom, are sisters. My girls aunt won't talk to her now. She said she didn't know why they fired her, she never did anything wrong. Of course, when I see her cousin at her shop I don't say anything other than hi.

just found this thread...

Some comments:

if I followed it correctly after year 1 there was the Tsunami and while as far as I know it didnt hit Samui the economical damage will have been there...

In Phuket last year and current year seem to be the real recovery years...

Personally I never except one night 22 years ago was in Samui and that was enough. Reason not the girls (I brought one) but the damned room showing all the mistakes a fisherman will make building for farangs. I am not expanding on this and anyway living on Phuket for many years

was 22 years ago possible without too much money to start, now it isnt...

Anyway keep in in mind you come to Samui for few weeks, not a few years...

She will have heard this many times so if she is nice looking, she sure will have a Thai boyfriend in the background.

Babies: I donot know if you know what black light is but its a fantastic tool to see stretchmarks were they shouldnt be....Most bars have one on the ceilings and its the one when used making your white shirts a neon sign...Note thats only to show you what a black light is! Another thing: you kept her waiting for 5 years. ASK here and find out what consequences are obviously being a long term resident here makes it different but on the other hand I still remember one of the bars I often came and one of the girls in panic in the morning as the owner wasnt around (is another funny story) but she wanted the day bus to Buriram. I didnt even know there was one...

They needed 2000 baht for the trip and I would get it back after she came back. A few days later I spotted her in the bar and she said she had just arived in the morning she was still without money. A few days later she suddenly came and passed me the 2000 baht and I decided to refuse it. A girlfriend of hers aproached me and asked what happened as she was crying every night so next time I saw he I asked WHY she want to pay back and answer was it would made her happy... To clarify: they start looking at you as a friend NOT a customer and that takes time you havent got in a few weeks...