The Gay Flight Attendant

[Martin]

THE GAY FLIGHT ATTENDANT

My flight was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant, who seemed

to put everyone in a good mood as he served us food and drinks.

As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle and told us that

'Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he'll be landing the big scary plane shortly, so lovely people, if you could just put your trays up, that would be super.'

On his trip back up the aisle, he noticed this well-dressed and rather Arabic looking woman hadn't moved a muscle.

'Perhaps you didn't hear me over those big brute engines but I asked you to raise your trazy-poo, so the main man can pitty-pat us on the ground.'

She calmly turned her head and said, 'In my country, I am called a Princess and I take orders from no one.'

To which the flight attendant replied, without missing a beat, 'Well, sweet-cheeks, in my country I'm called a Queen, so I outrank you.

Tray-up, Bitch'

[Naam]

true story:

British Airways first class HKG-LHR (years ago)

-we asked for blankets

-flight attendant (male) removes blanket from wrapper and tucks me in (window seat) including my legs, feet and around my shoulders

-flight attendant throws wrapped blanket on wife's lap (aisle seat)

-wife shouts on top of her voice "wouldn't you like to strangle me?"

-i couldn't hold back and laughed out loudly

-wife was not amused!