I will be working with some new members of the Thailand Tourist Police while attempting to teach them some English survival skills. It would be helpful to me if members could share their experiences, both positive and negative, so that I can better assist these new recruits in being more effective with English speaking tourists and foreigners. All opinions are OK!

I did some work with them before the Asian games here a few years back.

If you are their teacher, you shouldn't have any problems with them.

I wouldn't expect them to take it very seriously though.

There will be a token "head" guy there probably. Get on well with him, and ALL will be ok.

Thy're pretty toothless to be honest but do have their uses such as sorting out rip offs etc.

They can be either, helpful or a hindrance.

If you ask them for directions, they are generally helpful, if you ask them where to score some Thai sticks, they are mostly a hindrance.

They've helped me out a few times. As far as I'm concerned, they're fine in this town. Always polite and I'm always polite back.

The occasional bottle of Scotch and a golf lesson on the beach dosn't go amiss.

My experience with the Tourist Police:

I was working in Ayuttyha a couple of years ago, staying with a friend near the backpacker quarter whilst researching my thesis.

I was sat in his garden poring over some particularly sticky translations when a local Guesthouse owner came into the garden looking flustered accompanied by a Tourist Copper. They asked me to go with them and led me out on to the street.

There was a small crowd gathered around a Bangkok taxi where there were three harassed looking French backpackers stood sheepishly nearby.

It turned out that they had got this taxi from Khao San Road having agreed on 500B as a fare. On arrival they gave the driver a 1000B note which he trousered and slipped to a mate who was waiting for him. He then denied that they had payed him anything and was demanding his 500B fare.

The French tourists were insistent that they had payed him and things were getting unpleasant but the Tourist Police had arrived and were keeping things calm but spoke little English which is why they sent for me.

The taxi driver was clearly drunk and was using some pretty fruity language much to the disgust of the onlooking Thais who seemed to symapthise with the French tourists.

Things had reached an impasse with the French insisting they'd paid him and wanting their 500B change, and the driver demanding his 500B fare. The Tourist police wanted to check the driver's pockets and car, but the driver knew they had little real authority.

I asked them to call in the real police which they seemed reluctant to do seeming to think they could sort it out themselves. As soon as the real police were mentioned the driver began to get a bit worried and he tried to leave the scene and gave himself away a little and he got more and more abusive.

To avoid a potentially nasty scene and knowing that this guy was probably part of some taxi mafia somewhere, I persuaded the tourists to cut their losses and write off their 500B to experience which they reluctantly did, probably not realising how unpleasant things could have got. In the end the taxi driver was allowed to leave with a 1000B note cafefully stashed with a mate and the French tourists were left with a lesson that KSrd is no place to get a long distance taxi from.

In my eyes the Tourist Police were good for preventing any real unpleasantness yet when it came to actually doing something they were toothless.

Just call Kanjanaburi Tourist Police. They will send Somchai there, and he will end this problem quickly! No more hassle...

Or even closer, call Ayuttaya/Uthai Police Station. They will fry the taxi driver's balls until he has to give 500B change to the French tourist!

They can be either, helpful or a hindrance.

If you ask them for directions, they are generally helpful, if you ask them where to score some Thai sticks, they are mostly a hindrance.

Please teach them how to say "Its OK sir, you are free to go"