Careful What You Hear Them Say

[patklang]

I told a thai lady i loved her moi.as i thought all hair was called moi.after her shock we had a laugh,but still love her pom but not seen her moi.

[BigSnake]

My Humble opinion all farangs should keep their g/f's pussy BUSY!

[Kf6vci]

E mail yesterday from wife "But noting in chicken accept Fired "

OK 10 points for whoever can guess what she meant?

A: she wants nothing but KFC chicken...?

[robblok]

It's even sadder when I hear guys ridiculing Thai people's English when it's 10 times better than their Thai. And they are in Thailand.

I can only inmagine the mistakes i make that are funny.

I tend not to say banana anymore because i sometimes confuse it with the other male banana.. that is funny but not with strange girls

Also i once said in thai Luck(my dog) likes to eat my testicles (kador) while i wanted to to say Lucky likes to to eat bones (kadoek) my mother in law found it real funny and im often reminded of it.

[Tod Daniels]

Really if we are typing thai/engrish for accuracy; the correct sentence(s) would be

"You sa-tupid girl. You go sa-kool"

The most common thai character for the 's' sound (ส) when coupled with another consonant will almost always have an inherent and voiced 'a' (-ะ) sound built in which cannot be easily unlearned. Examples; สวัสดี (sa-wat-dii), สบาย (sa-bai). It is one of the most hard wired language rules that a thai learns. Often times they are using their language rules to speak engrish, hence the mispronunciation. That is why you hear, 'sa-tupid', 'sa-lowly', 'sa-top', 'sa-kool', 'sa-tamp'.

[sabaijai]

Posts with Thai script deleted as per forum rules.

[DC1066]

Sadly we accept second rate 'engrish' (if it can even be rated that highly) every day we coexist with these diminutive, yet ever smiling, people here in the glorious "Land 'O Thais". What I find oxymoronic (more than most aberrant behavioral traits pawned off as thai culture here) is that EVERY thai took english EVERY day they ever attended school, yet I have rarely seen a race of people more reticent about speaking.

The mind wobble that foreigners would have an (in)significant other who's engrish resembles that of a 4th grade drop out Appalachian hillbilly from rural America. The depth of the conversations I overhear often times is so shallow I can't even begin to fathom it. Then again some people don't need deep conversations, and "I go eat, sa-leep now, tired to mut, can and does suffice along with charades, pantomiming and hand gestures.

As an aside;

A friend of mine who peruses the "meet live thai women" dating sites (as opposed to meeting dead thai women which I hear aren't as much fun) called me the other day.

A girl who's screen name was "Bung-rat" had typed on her profile; "I look man who has big herat".

When I asked my friend if he'd contacted her yet, he said he was afraid his he-rat wasn't big enough.

It's even sadder when I hear guys ridiculing Thai people's English when it's 10 times better than their Thai. And they are in Thailand.

I have to agree, especially when half the people whose first language is English, can't speak it correctly these days.

I do though think "most" of the people posting on this thread are laughing at the mistakes - both Thai and English - with affection, rather than pointing fingers at those silly Thai people.

[G54]

How can you mistake Busy for Pussy ?

Pussy sounds like like Pusee.

Busy sounds llike Bizee.

Doh! Because I got her to repeat it and she herself realised what she had said afterwards. Why the need to put a dampener on it? Just accept the fact some of us can see the humour in these situations and some cannot. Also it is getting some funny replies too.

I agree,it's these little things that make you have a laugh.My wife once told me that"She will grab her dick"...I just kinda stared at her,trying to work out how i missed it,having been married for so long... turns out it was her abbreviation for "Dictionary"...

Bet you were worried about her having the operation

[mittheimp]

this thread reads like the letters page from 'viz' comic!

[GrahamF]

I was talking with my wife and her friend once about the fact that it had been snowing.

Thai word for snow - hi ma - apparently my pronunciation was not quite right and they both fell on the floor - I'd said 'horses pussy'.

I still have to be careful with this one.

So that's what I said! I was on the phone to a friend in Thailand a couple of weeks ago and was telling her we had, had a lot of snow here in New York. I had looked up snow in my dictionary and said "hi ma", and she just started laughing hysterically but wouldn't tell me why. Everytime we have talked since then she always asks if I still have "hi ma"! Too funny, she is such a smarta#s!

Edited January 19, 2009 by GrahamF

[Pakeha]

I agree,it's these little things that make you have a laugh.My wife once told me that"She will grab her dick"...I just kinda stared at her,trying to work out how i missed it,having been married for so long... turns out it was her abbreviation for "Dictionary"...

Haha. Yes 'dic' does seem to be the common term for dictionary. I often smile at "Where's my dic?", "Have you seen my dic?", "I can't find my dic", Or my all time favourite... "You are wrong. I checked my dic and it said...."

[robblok]

I was talking with my wife and her friend once about the fact that it had been snowing.

Thai word for snow - hi ma - apparently my pronunciation was not quite right and they both fell on the floor - I'd said 'horses pussy'.

I still have to be careful with this one.

So that's what I said! I was on the phone to a friend in Thailand a couple of weeks ago and was telling her we had, had a lot of snow here in New York. I had looked up snow in my dictionary and said "hi ma", and she just started laughing hysterically but wouldn't tell me why. Everytime we have talked since then she always asks if I still have "hi ma"! Too funny, she is such a smarta#s!

Made the same mistake only i said dog pussy instead of horse pussy. Quite funny i think its a common mistake.

[Monkeypants]

A long time ago me and my missus was in a supermarket in the UK.

She asked for a culinder, so I thought. After finding a culinder, she said " no not that, I want colilander "

We then walked to the herbs section and found the corriander that she was after.

We had a good laugh over that, and still do.

Edited January 20, 2009 by Monkeypants

[George4]

How can you mistake Busy for Pussy ?

Pussy sounds like like Pusee.

Busy sounds llike Bizee.

Doh! Because I got her to repeat it and she herself realised what she had said afterwards. Why the need to put a dampener on it? Just accept the fact some of us can see the humour in these situations and some cannot. Also it is getting some funny replies too.

it's like when a bar girl said to me when I refused to buy her a drink "I no rat"............she meat I was ignorant

[phoolish]

I sent an sms to my gf one time saying that Im sick.

She replied back saying "Are you take teled?"

At first, I was like "What the???" then an hour later, I figured it out.

Replied back to her "Yes, I've taken my tablet."

[toybits]

Variations of the same theme - Saw a Sign at Chiang Rai that said "A very WORM Welcome to You!"

My wife sent me email yesterday.

"Dont worry I take care you worm"

I laughed, she meant warm.

She was also embarrassed but found it funny when I explained, we had a good laugh.

[toybits]

An announcement introducing new staff at an office along Sukhumvit road said the new volunteer had a degree in Pubic Health.

[toybits]

I knew someone who wanted to change her nickname because the locals always called her CLIT.

[wolfmanjack]

Sadly we accept second rate 'engrish' (if it can even be rated that highly) every day we coexist with these diminutive, yet ever smiling, people here in the glorious "Land 'O Thais". What I find oxymoronic (more than most aberrant behavioral traits pawned off as thai culture here) is that EVERY thai took english EVERY day they ever attended school, yet I have rarely seen a race of people more reticent about speaking.

The mind wobble that foreigners would have an (in)significant other who's engrish resembles that of a 4th grade drop out Appalachian hillbilly from rural America. The depth of the conversations I overhear often times is so shallow I can't even begin to fathom it. Then again some people don't need deep conversations, and "I go eat, sa-leep now, tired to mut, can and does suffice along with charades, pantomiming and hand gestures.

As an aside;

A friend of mine who peruses the "meet live thai women" dating sites (as opposed to meeting dead thai women which I hear aren't as much fun) called me the other day.

A girl who's screen name was "Bung-rat" had typed on her profile; "I look man who has big herat".

When I asked my friend if he'd contacted her yet, he said he was afraid his he-rat wasn't big enough.

It's even sadder when I hear guys ridiculing Thai people's English when it's 10 times better than their Thai. And they are in Thailand.

My guess is if most of us had taken 1 hour per day of thai language in school complete with exams for 12-16 years we would be able to speak thai as well or better than most thais.

My contribution to the language flaw was when i first came to thailand I tried to ask for chicken breast at KFC. I ended up asking for chicken milk which got confused looks from the staff and a pretty good laugh from everyone in line.

[MyphuketLife]

E mail yesterday from wife "But noting in chicken accept Fired "

OK 10 points for whoever can guess what she meant?

Nothing in Kitchen except ...... I don't know the last part Fries, Fried Rice, ??

[MyphuketLife]

My guess is if most of us had taken 1 hour per day of thai language in school complete with exams for 12-16 years we would be able to speak thai as well or better than most thais.

You have to be joking a farang with 16years * 365 hours = 5,840 hours training or less than one full year in hours, will be able to speak better or the same as a Thai that has been speaking thai his/her whole life.... Comments like this is what make us farang look like A$$'s

If a thai had 5,840 hours of english classes do you think they would speak better english than an english man?

[DC1066]

My guess is if most of us had taken 1 hour per day of thai language in school complete with exams for 12-16 years we would be able to speak thai as well or better than most thais.

You have to be joking a farang with 16years * 365 hours = 5,840 hours training or less than one full year in hours, will be able to speak better or the same as a Thai that has been speaking thai his/her whole life.... Comments like this is what make us farang look like A$$'s

If a thai had 5,840 hours of english classes do you think they would speak better english than an english man?

I think he meant, we'd be better able to speak Thai than the Thai can speak English - but I don't necessarily agree. I know plenty of English people who have taken 3 years of French/German/Spanish and can hardly speak a word of the chosen language.

I also think his sums are out as well - how many Thai's take an hour a day from the day they are born to being 16?

Its an individual thing, some will do well and some won't and its hard to say 'the average Thai', but other than the odd grammatical error - car red and some odd pronunciations - I think most do pretty well.

[lodesafun]

So I say to my Tgf I want her to move fast cause we have to go to "Tesco". She jumps up smiles at me and says ok, ok I hurry.

I'm waiting downsatirs getting a bit mad that it's taking her so long, Screaming up the Steps Hurry Hurry .

She comes down Dressed to the Max, earings dangling, Full make-up, shoes in hand and I look at her and said Why Have you dressed up?

She say For to go "Disco".

when I stopped laughing I explained to her beautiful but hurt face I had said Tesco

Turned my attitude around so fast I went and put a better shirt on . Guess who went Dancing.

And People have to ask why I love Thailand.....

[dotcom]

When I first started dating my current g/f I would send her text. When can I see you? She answers back " I wont see you"

I am very puzzled by this & it happens repeatedly. Finally I work out she means "I WANT SEE YOU".

[Maigo6]

When I first started dating my current g/f I would send her text. When can I see you? She answers back " I wont see you"

I am very puzzled by this & it happens repeatedly. Finally I work out she means "I WANT SEE YOU".

Basic English should be known by all the overseas university graduates that ThaiVisa members attract.

DCom, are you saying your GF isn't a HiSO Thai Chinese Rich girl from an influential family with a PHD from Harvard ?

OMG, you'll get run out of ThaiVisa for that.

[dotcom]

No but I am hi-so & my girl is from Uttardit so she's not from Issan. She's from outside the zone.

[Maigo6]

No but I am hi-so & my girl is from Uttardit so she's not from Issan. She's from outside the zone.

The Zone ?

[Chung noi]

Great stories,

I had a Thai friend in college that liked to sing along with songs.....once I heard her singing " Everytime you go you take a piece of meat with you" instead of "Everytime you go you take a piece of me with you". I still LOL everytime I hear that song, and sing it the way she did.

*j*

[Pakeha]

Basic English should be known by all the overseas university graduates that ThaiVisa members attract.

DCom, are you saying your GF isn't a HiSO Thai Chinese Rich girl from an influential family with a PHD from Harvard ?

OMG, you'll get run out of ThaiVisa for that.

[TAWP]

When I first started dating my current g/f I would send her text. When can I see you? She answers back " I wont see you"

I am very puzzled by this & it happens repeatedly. Finally I work out she means "I WANT SEE YOU".

Basic English should be known by all the overseas university graduates that ThaiVisa members attract.

DCom, are you saying your GF isn't a HiSO Thai Chinese Rich girl from an influential family with a PHD from Harvard ?

OMG, you'll get run out of ThaiVisa for that.

Maigo6>> You seem to be inherently bitter for some reason. Over the years more people here have mentioned their loved ones being from areas outside Bangkok and the 'white-chinese' sub-group you seem to despise, but only for the reason that some posters have highlighted the fact that theirs are not you suddenly have to act like a majority here has. It just isn't so.

And btw, my wife's spelling is overall better than mine but I'm better tuned to slang and dialectal differences within the English language. And since she was schooled in Thailand her accent [more so in the beginning] carries[/d] a Thai slant, even though it's far better than many others I have heard. It's just the nature of the game when English classes, even in University, focused on spelling and grammar over conversations and pronunciations. And the complete lack of English-spoken shows on regulare tv-channels [i.e. not cabel or satellite] doesn't help. Or the horrid quality of many English teachers here...