Some Tottenham Hotspur Jokes

A young boy goes to social services and tells them he has nowhere to live. 'What about your parents?' asks the social worker. 'No, they beat me,' says the boy. 'What about your grandparents?' says the social worker. 'No, they beat me even harder!' says the boy. 'Well ... where do you want to stay then?' replies the social worker. 'Tottenham,' says the boy. 'They don't beat anyone.

What do the Premier League and a cowboy have in common? They both have spurs at their feet.

What's the difference between Bigfoot and the Spurs defence? Bigfoot has been spotted several times.

What does a Spurs fan do after he sees his team win? Turns off the Xbox

Haringey council has blocked Tottenham's plans to build a new ground on Northumberland Park. A town hall source said: 'We don't mind having a funfair there once a year, but a circus every fortnight is a bit much.'