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Posted

Quote "Just like I heard that if you ejaculate when diving below 20 metres, your head will explode due to pressure differentials."

I haven't tried that, but an aqua dump below 20 metres is nearly impossible. :o

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Posted
My mother always told me that if I ate too much of one thing, I'd end up looking like it.

I've been eating those jumbo size sausages for years.

Didn't work!

:D

The old "you are what you eat" saying, huh.

peder.klockmann, if that's true, have you been eating chipmunks? :o

Posted
Hi I'm a new member, My name is eleven, I'm a Chinese teacher in Bangkok.

/edit

If the school was that good the 'teachers' would know to spam in a more relevent sub-forum :o

Posted
My Ol' man used to say that if I picked my nose too much, the top of my head would cave in.

Is this true or have I been misinformed for the last 45 years? :o

Not true, all you have to do is look at Thai people!!!!!!!!!

P.S. My mum told me walls have ears! Don't eat sausages now!

How long can you keep a chicken in the freezer???????

Posted
If they make olive oil out of olives and peanut oil out of peanuts... what the <deleted> do they make baby oil out of?????  :o

And they put chocolate in chocolate biscuits, cheese goes into cheese crackers. What goes into dog biscuits?

I went to a restaurant the other night. The Drinks waiter came to give me drinks, the Food waiter came to give me food. So what's the Head waiter going to give me?

Posted
Why do they call it the Miss Universe contest?????????

Because humans are extremely egotistical and arrogant and believe the whole Universe revolves around our little planet, Chuch' :o

Posted
Why does American football have a world series when it's only Americans that play the stupid game ?   :D

American football does not have a World Series, it does have a Super Bowl though.

The World Series is the American baseball championship at the end of each season.

The 'World' part comes from the name of an American newspaper that reported the first series. Sorry, don't know which city. I will agree that 'soccer' or European footbal is a much better game than American football. Baseball I could care less about. I like NBA basketball and European league football. Now you know. :o

Posted

I know when you have nuts on a wall you have Wallnuts, and when you have nuts on your chest you have Chestnuts but what do you have when you have nuts on your chin....? :o:D:D

Posted
Why is it that salmon always spawn up-river and have to swim miles against the current... are they <deleted> stupid?  :o

They lay their eggs upriver so that the fry (baby salmon) can ride the current to the sea. The salmon are very strong swimmers, and by pushing far upstream they also push the eggs and fry beyond the reach of most predetors.

And now you know. :D

If they were stupid... I wouldn't spend near as long out in the cold catching dinner.

cv

Posted
Why is it that salmon always spawn up-river and have to swim miles against the current... are they <deleted> stupid?   :o

Of course they're stupid. When was the last time you saw a salmon with a diploma?

:D:D

Here's an old one.

If 7/11 are open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 12 months a year.....why do they have locks on their doors? :D

Posted
Why do birds... suddenly appear... every time... you are near?

"Steven"

If it's vultures then you really need to take care of yourself better. :o

cv

Posted
Why is it that salmon always spawn up-river and have to swim miles against the current... are they <deleted> stupid?   :o

Of course they're stupid. When was the last time you saw a salmon with a diploma?

:D:D

Didn't Salmon Rushdi have a diploma? :D

Posted
Why do birds... suddenly appear... every time... you are near?

"Steven"

Right then... :o

How many roads must a man walk down.......before you call him a man?

:D

Posted
Right then... :o

How many roads must a man walk down.......before you call him a man?

:D

If I were a carpenter and you were a lady

Would you marry me anyway, would you have my baby?

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