kaz49 Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 My farang friend who lives next door ended a relationship in August abruptly with Laos boyfriend when she found out he was married with a couple of small kids, the usual story of lies, deceit, met his family etc. Sent him packing (with some baht) and told him not to come back. Wont go into too much more detail as it is really between them and I have referred her to Thaivisa if she would like to discuss more. I can say that she changed SIM. She also disconnected landline, after a few threatening phone calls from an anonomyous guy in northern Thailand threatening her to "leave Thailand now". She is still currently receiving angry unstable/emails (5 months now) from ex and the latest one saying if he doesnt find another tourist/victim soon he is going to come "to get her". She did tell him early on that she had gone to the police in Bangkok and her embassy and reported him, and she herself would be leaving Thailand shortly. (Unfortunately, this was my advice, and it appears it hasnt worked, he seems to know she is still here). She just thought, as I did, he would calm down eventually (he lives works/Laos not Thailand). IMHO dont think he would have the cash to do a trip back to Thailand. She has moved on with her life (not easy) and has a tentative job offer in Bangkok and doesnt really want to move apartments, would be a last resort. I am probably being paranoid, I am concerned for my friend, and albeit perhaps selfishly, this loser knows where I live, I did meet him on a couple of occasions. If he, or one of his friends/relatives take it upon themselves to actually put this threat into action, I am worried they might come to my door looking for her. I am leaving myself in a few weeks and want to avoid any confrontations. Any advice would be appreciated? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
samuibeachcomber Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 i'd be moving location and job.....................just to be on the safe side. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Explorer Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 Move out and keep a low profile for a bit... just to be safe. Things can get ugly as it developes further. Explorer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redscouse Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 I would think they are empty threats made by a man who has lost face by getting dumped. You say it has been 5 months, if anything was going to happen the chances are it would have happened already. In my opinion he is just trying to make her life uncomfortable by making these threats. Tell her to not respond to any emails, also I doubt that he really knows she is still in Thailand, he is calling her bluff. Just my opinion however if you still feel unsafe take copies of the emails to the police, if the policeman you deal with doesn't seem interested then speak to his senior and keep going until you get one to take it seriously, maybe an arrest warrant can be issued and if he does show up he can be arrested on this warrant before doing any harm. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
girlx Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 i have heard far too many stories of situations like this gone very bad in my time in LOS, and i would not tempt fate. she should definitely consider moving apartments and staying under the radar. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 tell her to change her email, she already changed phone & mobile so email is the only link he has to communcate with her. if she is really that worried then move but tbh if he is in Laos & doens't have the money to travel then it just sounds like he is trying (and succeeding) in scaring her. He can only ruin her life if she lets him. My advice, get on with living & if he does jack up the abuse, move & file a police report. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jtp Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 My farang friend who lives next door ended a relationship in August abruptly with Laos boyfriend when she found out he was married with a couple of small kids, the usual story of lies, deceit, met his family etc. Sent him packing (with some baht) and told him not to come back. Wont go into too much more detail as it is really between them and I have referred her to Thaivisa if she would like to discuss more. I can say that she changed SIM. She also disconnected landline, after a few threatening phone calls from an anonomyous guy in northern Thailand threatening her to "leave Thailand now". She is still currently receiving angry unstable/emails (5 months now) from ex and the latest one saying if he doesnt find another tourist/victim soon he is going to come "to get her". She did tell him early on that she had gone to the police in Bangkok and her embassy and reported him, and she herself would be leaving Thailand shortly. (Unfortunately, this was my advice, and it appears it hasnt worked, he seems to know she is still here). She just thought, as I did, he would calm down eventually (he lives works/Laos not Thailand). IMHO dont think he would have the cash to do a trip back to Thailand. She has moved on with her life (not easy) and has a tentative job offer in Bangkok and doesnt really want to move apartments, would be a last resort. I am probably being paranoid, I am concerned for my friend, and albeit perhaps selfishly, this loser knows where I live, I did meet him on a couple of occasions. If he, or one of his friends/relatives take it upon themselves to actually put this threat into action, I am worried they might come to my door looking for her. I am leaving myself in a few weeks and want to avoid any confrontations. Any advice would be appreciated? I know this sounds harsh,but her leaving Thailand altogether is not a bad idea.I would not tempt fate.If this nutcase has kept it up for five months,he may be building up so much anger inside,that it is only a matter of time before he explodes.On the other hand,he may simply be a bag of wind...There is no way of knowing...But your friend should take threats like that seriously,there really are some monsters out there...Just take a look at some other threads...46-year-old Munich resident Astrid Al-Assaad-Schachner...My best advice to you is MOVE!!! Don't leave yourself in a position that can lead this person, or his friends to find you.Far better to remove the possibility of a confrontation,then having to deal with its aftermath.You or your friend may feel that by leaving,he has won.But remember,when dealing with psychopaths, there is no winner. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OxfordWill Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 set up an auto response on your email which notifies people "this email account is closed." Change apartments/house, to a completely new area. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kaz49 Posted January 13, 2009 Author Share Posted January 13, 2009 i have heard far too many stories of situations like this gone very bad in my time in LOS, and i would not tempt fate. she should definitely consider moving apartments and staying under the radar. Thanks everyone for advice so far. We are catching up for a drink tonight so will discuss options and suggest she block the emails and if she chooses to move I can give her a hand. Girlx, their was talk some time back about a book, cultural differences, beach boys etc. Did this get off the ground? If so, could be an additional story coming your way! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
girlx Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 if he is in Laos & doens't have the money to travel then it just sounds like he is trying (and succeeding) in scaring her. that's pretty messed up behavior though, and these guys are good at scamming money and bus tickets out of people, so it is possible he could find his way to her... Girlx, their was talk some time back about a book, cultural differences, beach boys etc. Did this get off the ground? If so, could be an additional story coming your way! nope hasn't gotten anywhere i confess... been busy with my real job. but i would still be up for collaborating on one! if anyone has stories they want to add, PM me... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patklang Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 kep the email account open just for him and save everything for possible evidence.After listening to so many stories that turn into disasters,if i was a woman in thailand i would move and keep my head down for a while.Many of these guys are nuts and after losing face(and money) they can turn very violent,and i would not trust any of them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
girlx Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 yes some of the the guys act the same as the bar girls, who are well renowned for their acts of vengeance Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mssabai Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 To be honest I agree with the fact that he has been doing this for 5 months and hasn't done anything so there is not much chance of it. Still it is very easy in Thailand to move house quickly. Just to be on the safe side I would do this if at all possible (not you, her)...just for peace of mind. He is just a bully though who enjoys getting a reaction. PS I am sure he is scared of the police...he would know full well there is nothing thai police would like more than to open a can of woop ass on a Laoation harrassing a farang. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
submaniac Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 PS I am sure he is scared of the police...he would know full well there is nothing thai police would like more than to open a can of woop ass on a Laoation harrassing a farang. +1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patklang Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 yes some of the the guys act the same as the bar girls, who are well renowned for their acts of vengeance Never heard of many thai girls with a gun.Its a natural occupation for thai guys to shoot each other for fun.A very strange type of person these thai guys,in fact the strangest i have ever seen in my life,they are like a loose cannon ready to explode,except all of thaivisa ladies husbands/bf/bar boys/beach boys. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
girlx Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 the strangest i have ever seen in my life,they are like a loose cannon ready to explode,except all of thaivisa ladies husbands/bf/bar boys/beach boys. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sbk Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 Absolutely patklang, thats why every single thai man is a murderer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jtp Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 yes some of the the guys act the same as the bar girls, who are well renowned for their acts of vengeance Never heard of many thai girls with a gun.Its a natural occupation for thai guys to shoot each other for fun.A very strange type of person these thai guys,in fact the strangest i have ever seen in my life,they are like a loose cannon ready to explode,except all of thaivisa ladies husbands/bf/bar boys/beach boys. ??? Thats not correct.I have many Thai male friends,they in no way act differently to most other nationalities i have met.Sure,some Thais are messed up in the head,but most are normal people.It is rare and "few n far" between to meet a Thai male that wants to shoot another person.Most of my friends are police officers,and they don't act the way they are often accused of on Thaivisa.And of all the Thai men i have met,only one had lost the plot,and that was due to Yaba abuse.But i would imagine if you were to hang out with criminals,then you would think that all Thai men are criminals.But i really do feel that a person who keeps up his abuse for that long,is possibly dangerous.He MUST have something wrong in his head,and therein lies the danger,rational thinking and logic go out the window,and you should try to think "What is the worst possibilty"?I don't want to scare the op,but it is a real possibilty that he will retaliate,given the opportunity:Nothing would make me happier then to be proven wrong.But if your friend moves,then perhapes she can have a more pleasant life,one where she doesn't have to look over her shoulder. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 a natural occupation for thai guys to shoot each other for fun.A very strange type of person these thai guys,in fact the strangest i have ever seen in my life,they are like a loose cannon ready to explode,except all of thaivisa ladies husbands/bf/bar boys/beach boys. and yet you chose to live in a country with 30million of them, it's a wonder you leave your home at all . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patklang Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 30 million is including male children too????? i dont hang around in thai mens space when they are drinking heavy,thats one of the big problems in Thailand especialy upcountry.I generaly keep in the company of strange farangs lol.Thai bars and karaoke places can be a bit dangerous,as we have seen many many times on the news. BOO, i have no problems leaving home and feel safe in Thailand but there is a trend in THAILAND for crazy shootings. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patklang Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 Ironic we are posting about nutty thai guys,the news was on and it was the double shooting of security guard and ex gf which was on cctv,again i will use the term,LOOSE CANNON. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boo Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 and on the pattaya forum there is a news item of yet another thai woman stabbing her bf. what exactly is your point? thailand has thai people commiting crimes, shock horror!!!. In UK you will find it a bad idea to hang around with drunk UK men too, trouble will often kick off. How terrible to live in paranoid fear! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kaz49 Posted January 15, 2009 Author Share Posted January 15, 2009 I really appreciate everyone's input on this. I had read about that dreadful murder of the German woman and got into quite a state over it, hence the reason for my post to ascertain what others thoughts were. " We found another apartment today for my friend in another area, which is actually going to be more convenient for her if she obtains the job/ position she is after (and its cheaper than here). Have organized removalists for the weekend. I will give her hand so as to make sure the removalists dont spill the beans about her new location to any of the staff. She is determined to stay in Bangkok, (I dont agree) but thats her choice. Family members (two big burly brothers are coming to visit for a holiday shortly, so this will be good). She has enough money to get a ticket home instantly if need be and we will keep in regular contact via email etc. Will need to get familiar with the restaurants, shops etc in the new location and I have encouraged her to increase support networks, both Thai and Expat. As for me, I will leave for a few days and do another trip up to beautiful (cold) Changrai, and will only have a couple of days back in my apartment before I leave the country. So if anyone does turn up here, I wont be around to answer the door. I also intend to contact the nice/cute policeman who gave me 120 baht when my bag was pickpocketed a few weeks back and give him a bottle of scotch as a thank you. Good idea to have a friend in the Thai police force me thinks! cheers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
endure Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 A good book explaining cultural differences is 'Thailand Fever' by Pirazzi & Vasant. Thread now closed at OP's request. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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