Am I Lucky That My Gf Doesn't Have A Family?

[Svenn]

I've noticed so many threads over the years that focus on the problems associate with the gf/wive's family... my gf of the last 2 years doesn't really have a family- she has one grandma that lives with her and the only other person she respects is an aunt which occasionally visits and they buy stuff together (share a car). Are there any other TV members with situations like this?

I feel sad that the only person she leans on besides me is getting old and might not be around much longer, but I also feel lucky that I don't have to deal with a mother/father/siblings that could be a real hassle (ask for money, etc.). I'm wondering what will happen 10 years down the line once the grandma dies, do some thai women just live alone (with their husband)? I'm thinking the familial instinct in Isaan folk is so strong she'd probably find someone else to hang around with, lol, cuz they can't resist having loud noisy houses where everyone's interrupting eachother (see the other thread ).

[Moonrakers]

My misses is an Orphan, her Father died when she was young and her Mother unexpectedly dies nearly 5 years ago about 3 weeks before we married.

She does have an estranged Grandmother, and a few cousins up north somewhere, although these relationship have all but died do to my wife finding that many requests for money to pay hospital bills where bogus. Now my wife will only send any money if needed directly to the hospital and so since the gravy train stopped, so has their interest in my wife and I.

So are we lucky? Well on finding out the my wife and I where to be married, her mother would have nothing to do with sin-sod, in fact she clearly stated the opposite as she wanted to help us out as much as possible both financially and in other ways (my wife was pregnant at the time). Also considering that we are a family of Three it would be great to have somebody else to help out from time to time as bringing up a kid and working full time can be stressful at times, not to mention of course that my wife misses her Mum.

With requests to sending money my wife has shown that when getting unreasonable requests for cash that could put a strain on ourselves, then it is just a case of saying no. But then my wife is reasonably well educated and quite smart, and so she can see clearly the difference between people asking for help and those whom are taking the piss.

[slapout]

Sounds like she has family, maybe just does not spend a lot of time with them (grandma excepted) due to her own reasons. If you are worried about quiet house after grandma dies, make babies, they make noise, invite aunt to live with her, or ask her if she foresees a problem and if so what would she consider as the solution. Between the two of you, I would think you can find a solution to what may not be a problem at all.

[samuibeachcomber]

good for you MR.you gotta good wife.

[JimsKnight]

Depends, for me not being a stay-at-home-type then a girl who doesn't have the family mill-stone around her neck is a bonus.

For others it will be the opposite etc etc.

[tmd5855]

I can only speak from my own experience.

GF of many many years has Mama, Papa, 3 brothers, 1 sister and 5 nieces/nephews.

Since I live Thailand (work offshore 4wks on/off) it has become the norm that the GF and I spend 1 week of my leave at her parents.

GF has a great time going around all the family, chatting, gossiping etc, while I chill out. Maybe do some DIY on her parents house or help were I can on the farm. Been doing so for a number of years now, would miss meeting the family on a regular basis. All gathered around for meals, days out together etc.

I am one of the lucky guys to have met a Thai woman with a good family, Papa got a good price for his harvest so out went the squat toilet and in came an European one? Arrived another time to find a bed for the mattress we slept on in our room.

Two examples of reciprocal treatment that you rarely hear about, usually its one way traffic, farang pay, farang do.

My rant has gone on long enough.

Point I wish to make is if you are involved with a Thai lady from a good and close family, do the correct things. You are made welcome and feel at home. Sadly that is a situation you cannot enjoy. Your task I think will be harder. You maybe be expected or looked upon to be all things she will miss by not having a family around.

Best of luck.

[SaamBaht]

My misses is an Orphan

The luckiest man in Thailand.

[JetsetBkk]

My misses is an Orphan

The luckiest man in Thailand.

Agreed. I myself am looking for a 25 year old, debt-free, friendless, orphan nymphomaniac virgin with a uni degree, perfect English, and excellent farang and Thai cooking skills. Not much luck so far.

[PoorSucker]

My misses is an Orphan

The luckiest man in Thailand.

Agreed. I myself am looking for a 25 year old, debt-free, friendless, orphan nymphomaniac virgin with a uni degree, perfect English, and excellent farang and Thai cooking skills. Not much luck so far.

Doesn't she have to be female?

[simon43]

I'm with JetSkiBkk on this one!!

Where do 25 year old, debt-free, friendless, orphan nymphomaniac virgin with a uni degree, perfect English, and excellent farang and Thai cooking skills HANG OUT??

Simon

[Moonrakers]

I'm with JetSkiBkk on this one!!

Where do 25 year old, debt-free, friendless, orphan nymphomaniac virgin with a uni degree, perfect English, and excellent farang and Thai cooking skills HANG OUT??

Simon

My apartment.

[JetsetBkk]

I'm with JetSkiBkk on this one!!

Where do 25 year old, debt-free, friendless, orphan nymphomaniac virgin with a uni degree, perfect English, and excellent farang and Thai cooking skills HANG OUT??

Simon

My apartment.

Lucky b*gger!

[JetsetBkk]

My misses is an Orphan

The luckiest man in Thailand.

Agreed. I myself am looking for a 25 year old, debt-free, friendless, orphan nymphomaniac virgin with a uni degree, perfect English, and excellent farang and Thai cooking skills. Not much luck so far.

Doesn't she have to be female?

Dämn! I knew someone would spot that!

[ClaytonSeymour]

I've noticed so many threads over the years that focus on the problems associate with the gf/wive's family... my gf of the last 2 years doesn't really have a family- she has one grandma that lives with her and the only other person she respects is an aunt which occasionally visits and they buy stuff together (share a car). Are there any other TV members with situations like this?

I feel sad that the only person she leans on besides me is getting old and might not be around much longer, but I also feel lucky that I don't have to deal with a mother/father/siblings that could be a real hassle (ask for money, etc.). I'm wondering what will happen 10 years down the line once the grandma dies, do some thai women just live alone (with their husband)? I'm thinking the familial instinct in Isaan folk is so strong she'd probably find someone else to hang around with, lol, cuz they can't resist having loud noisy houses where everyone's interrupting eachother (see the other thread ).

Yes, I'd say that you are lucky.

If I ever found myself single again, it's certainly something I'd look for - irrespective of whether it was a Thai, or, a Farang. Of course, should a rich heiress show interest in me - I'm sure I'd reconsider.

[teacup]

Well, yea it might be easier to not deal with the drama of her family. But u gotta remember that if she’s an orphan then she might have some abandonment issues to work out. Just be careful about her feelings because a simple fight could lead to a bigger issue.

and

If you don’t want to mess with someone elses family drama then don’t get married at all.

Just me

[petermik]

You are a lucky man indeed-last year I met a chinese/thai lady from BKK who has a university degree and an excellent job,but her mother who she lives with with her 2 children from her previous marriage-is making it very difficult for us.She gives her mother a lot of money each month and I feel this is the problem-money no. 1 but I will hang on in there-maybe I may have to wait until she dies?

[davyboy]

You are a lucky man indeed-last year I met a chinese/thai lady from BKK who has a university degree and an excellent job,but her mother who she lives with with her 2 children from her previous marriage-is making it very difficult for us.She gives her mother a lot of money each month and I feel this is the problem-money no. 1 but I will hang on in there-maybe I may have to wait until she dies?

Hmm! How long are you prepared to wait? 5/10/15/20 years!

[GuestHouse]

I've noticed so many threads over the years that focus on the problems associate with the gf/wive's family...

While perhaps not quite so salacious, you perhaps ought to pay attention the the many stories where the Thai family are supportive to mixed Thai/Farang marriages.

Plenty of Thai/Farang couples receive endless support and help from their Thai Inlaws, it's just not a story that grabs the headlines.

[Spee]

I've noticed so many threads over the years that focus on the problems associate with the gf/wive's family... my gf of the last 2 years doesn't really have a family- she has one grandma that lives with her and the only other person she respects is an aunt which occasionally visits and they buy stuff together (share a car). Are there any other TV members with situations like this?

All I can say is that we all have to play the hand we are dealt to the best of our ability. Your GF has adapted to living on her own and taking care of herself. There's a lot to be said for that. I came from what many would consider to be a large family and couldn't imagine a scenario of growing up differently because it is what I know. Your GF is almost on the opposite end of the spectrum and it is what she lived and knows.

My partner has some immediate family members and cousins in the village. I think it's good for her to have that support family support network nearby, especially with me working out of the country. Even though she and I talk at least once every day, it's hardly the same as being there for both she and I. She takes care of her mother and grandmother with some of the money I send, but so far we have not had any issues with other family members trying to put the arm on us for money.

[patklang]

Why dont guys checxk up the family situation before a long term relationship/marriage????

seems the natural thing to do in asia.

[Pierrot]

My misses is an Orphan

The luckiest man in Thailand.

Agreed. I myself am looking for a 25 year old, debt-free, friendless, orphan nymphomaniac virgin with a uni degree, perfect English, and excellent farang and Thai cooking skills. Not much luck so far.

They are a few around, but there is usually a reason why they are still single. She is either a nutcase or when she's going to list the condition for the wedding (of course no sex before wedding), you will do like every body else before you, run !

[skippybangkok]

My misses is an Orphan

The luckiest man in Thailand.

Agreed. I myself am looking for a 25 year old, debt-free, friendless, orphan nymphomaniac virgin with a uni degree, perfect English, and excellent farang and Thai cooking skills. Not much luck so far.

Try changing the hat, i bet thats the cause !

[dave9988]

I'm with JetSkiBkk on this one!!

Where do 25 year old, debt-free, friendless, orphan nymphomaniac virgin with a uni degree, perfect English, and excellent farang and Thai cooking skills HANG OUT??

Simon

nowhere near 50+ year old farang males. lol.

[henryalleman]

Sorry to say but there are a

[Moonrakers]

Sorry to say but there are a

.... number of farangs who think that. (Is this one of those make the story up sentence by sentence games?)

[henryalleman]

sorry to say but there are a lot of misplaced immature comments on this topic.

To the OP, you are a very lucky man that you find a girlfriend who have no family ties. It will safe you from allot of hassles. And I not only money wise. Because when your wife or girlfriend have family ties her loyalty towards them is more important than her loyalty to you. And if you have a girlfriend or wife with children, its even more so. Because, if you have an relationship with her,you must take in account that you also have an relationship with the people standing behind her back.

And this can be sometimes a big stress factor in a relationship, and many times even the reason for breaking up the relation. Some people will deny this but I'm afraid they put their head in the sand.

But I guess this is the case for every woman regardless race or culture.

[BygonKeaw]

ahhh the family thing again.

First few times i travelled to thailand before i moved here i got on with family like a house on fire, great buying all the beer, sending a relative off to 711 with a 1000 baht note to get a bottle of 680 baht whiskey an never seeing the change.

I think now i live here and dont do these silly things anymore they hate me. Thats great saves me money and im happy.

Family wants money???? then get them to earn it. cut the lawn, babysit. etc etc nothing in life is free.

[Alpinist]

My GF who is an amazing little girl has a great family who i get along with really well. All her siblings are well educated and have lived and studied abroad. the family is incredibly well off and very generous. I feel that they have really took a liking to me as within only two days of meeting them i had been brought to meet the grandparents at one of those Chinese restaurants that the old people like. Also they gave me some gifts and some for my family as well.

I met her while studying at a Japanese university, so that probably made all the difference.

[yabaaaa]

My misses is an Orphan

The luckiest man in Thailand.

Agreed. I myself am looking for a 25 year old, debt-free, friendless, orphan nymphomaniac virgin with a uni degree, perfect English, and excellent farang and Thai cooking skills. Not much luck so far.

Change yer hat for some Mickey Mouse ears Mel!!!

My wife's parents are both dead and she has little or nothing to do with her sisters and brothers.

[Maigo6]

Ask yourself this question.

Would you have considered yourself lucky if your parents had both died/ been killed and left you on your own ?

I just can't for the life of me understand how Farangs feel that they are lucky to have a partner who's family have all been killed.....

Very strange.