Allowance Or Shop

[niceman888222]

my tgf want me to buy her a shop selling girls underware. would it be cheaper just to give her allowance of 150$ a month. i dont see her making much.

[slapout]

Is the proposed business to be new or used underwear?Is she happy with your 150 dollar/month proposal? Where will business location be located? Where does the supply of new and or used underwear come from? Does she have impeccably taste in underwear? Will she model said underwear? If so post photo. Do you have a work permit to sale underwear? Just so many questions before I could give a informed answer/suggestion.

[bojo]

Is the proposed business to be new or used underwear?Is she happy with your 150 dollar/month proposal? Where will business location be located? Where does the supply of new and or used underwear come from? Does she have impeccably taste in underwear? Will she model said underwear? If so post photo. Do you have a work permit to sale underwear? Just so many questions before I could give a informed answer/suggestion.

What kind of post is that asking someone to post a picture of their girlfriend in underwear. Learn some respect or stop drinking at lunchtime.

Regards Bojo

[dondraper]

retail is very ez money. you buy stock then you just find a location that works. not hard to make money at it. you just need the initial bankroll to find the right location in case your first tries fail.

[givenall]

my tgf want me to buy her a shop selling girls underware. would it be cheaper just to give her allowance of 150$ a month. i dont see her making much.

If you are not here I would do neither.

If you are here with her then just take care of her and do not spend excessive amount either

[sanook2me]

my tgf want me to buy her a shop selling girls underware. would it be cheaper just to give her allowance of 150$ a month. i dont see her making much.

Personally thinking if you have the money and expertise to guide her in business surely that would be better for your relationship in the long term.

She gains financial independence away from you so money cannot become an issue in the relationship which it will eventually if you are paying her an allowance now.

Give her a chance and an opportunity. Do you have anything to lose as you are already paying maybe you would save money if she makes a profit and a salary.

My vote is for a shop. Imagine how proud of her you would be if she was generating her own money and your allowance can then be used for nice things like extra holidays etc...a much happier lifestyle in my opinion.

[chrisartist]

my tgf want me to buy her a shop selling girls underware. would it be cheaper just to give her allowance of 150$ a month. i dont see her making much.

I predict that setting her up to sell underwear will be a massive and constant drain on your resources.

1) start-up costs:

----decorating the shop

----buying shelving, counter, etc.

----buying stock

----security deposit for shop rental (often very high, can be as much as 10 times the monthly rent, imposed by unscrupulous Thais)

2) Running costs:

----monthly rent, utilities, plus food and miscellanous living expenses because sales don't cover costs

----buying new stock when she can't sell the old stock, on the grounds that underwear is a fashion item and you have to keep up with the times, even when you didn't sell your original stock when it was still fashionable

3) Miscellaneous problems:

----she will probably choose a poor location for the shop

----she will probably give massive discounts on items just to get rid of stock

----she will not keep good inventory

----she will not keep accurate accounts

----she will spend all her time in the shop in the erroneous belief that longer hours automatically mean more sales; as a result, you will never see her.

Speaking from experience, dude; did it twice (first time pets, second time clothing), but never again.

Give her THB15,000 a month to cover everything except food that she eats with you (nights out with friends, sick buffalo, parents' leaking roof, brother's drug problem, hospital expenses for sick mother who doesn't work, food for sister and niece because her husband left her, etc.)

[sanook2me]

family is more important and you never know when they are going to take off etc..

just stole this snippet from another posting..

For the people saying give her an allowance only are they still with the said g/fs they gave an allowance too?

Would you not enjoy the moment if she did make a profit and after all you can control costs before venturing into the business.

Go ahead and give her an opportunity with lots of careful guidance from yourself.

Tell her to give you a mini business plan

similar to what the other poster said

chrisartist

1) start-up costs:

----decorating the shop

----buying shelving, counter, etc.

----buying stock

----security deposit for shop rental (often very high, can be as much as 10 times the monthly rent, imposed by unscrupulous Thais)

2) Running costs:

----monthly rent, utilities, plus food and miscellanous living expenses because sales don't cover costs

----buying new stock when she can't sell the old stock, on the grounds that underwear is a fashion item and you have to keep up with the times, even when you didn't sell your original stock when it was still fashionable

if she can do this for you then you can at least consider it as she has the gumption to put it together and not just pillow talk.

[sanook2me]

forgot to say.

i gave money to a previous g/f to start a business with her sister an law...yes it failed and i lost the money.

BUT i didn't get involved at all and let them run away with the idea....

In hindsight i should have controlled it but that was due to my inexperience..

You need to be in on every decision made.

[chrisartist]

p.s. Unless she actually has experience of the retail business, e.g. by being a shop manager, she will almost certainly mess things up. I've met countless Thai women who want to start a business. They think that all you have to do is sit in a shop all day and wait for money to arrive. When I have questioned them about how they intend to go about setting up and running their prospective business, they have not the faintest clue.

In my case, I extracted promises from the women that they would do what I told them with respect to setting up and running the business. Empty promises. As soon as things were up and running, I was treated to the "I know what to do so I don't need to listen to you" frame of mind.

Luckily, I anticipated many of the problems and so did not invest too much initially: about THB60,000 for the pet shop and THB100,000 for the clothing shop. The pet shop had an interesting legacy; a problem that I did *not* anticipate. When the woman stopped trading, our house was home to over 100 guinea pigs. When I broke off the relationship, she wanted to take them with her. I refused to allow this, on the grounds that she would have neither the time nor the money to take care of them and they would die an early death. So, since then, I have spent nearly a million baht over five years, just taking care of guinea pigs. Luckily, I am very fond of the little critters. I didn't allow them to breed, so the population has now dwindled to 13.

[sanook2me]

p.s. Unless she actually has experience of the retail business, e.g. by being a shop manager, she will almost certainly mess things up. I've met countless Thai women who want to start a business. They think that all you have to do is sit in a shop all day and wait for money to arrive. When I have questioned them about how they intend to go about setting up and running their prospective business, they have not the faintest clue.

In my case, I extracted promises from the women that they would do what I told them with respect to setting up and running the business. Empty promises. As soon as things were up and running, I was treated to the "I know what to do so I don't need to listen to you" frame of mind.

Luckily, I anticipated many of the problems and so did not invest too much initially: about THB60,000 for the pet shop and THB100,000 for the clothing shop. The pet shop had an interesting legacy; a problem that I did *not* anticipate. When the woman stopped trading, our house was home to over 100 guinea pigs. When I broke off the relationship, she wanted to take them with her. I refused to allow this, on the grounds that she would have neither the time nor the money to take care of them and they would die an early death. So, since then, I have spent nearly a million baht over five years, just taking care of guinea pigs. Luckily, I am very fond of the little critters. I didn't allow them to breed, so the population has now dwindled to 13.

:D

Thats funny with the guinea pigs....

My point from my previous thread...you are no longer with that g/f but you gave her an opportunity which she blew..

much better than a general allowance that will stop when you are bored of her etc...

[chrisartist]

My point from my previous thread...you are no longer with that g/f but you gave her an opportunity which she blew..

much better than a general allowance that will stop when you are bored of her etc...

If I had given the women an allowance rather than funded the business, it is likely that I would still be in a relationship with one or the other of them. It was the problems caused by the failure of the business, and the women's refusal to heed my advice when playing around with my money, that led to my breaking of the relationship. If the business is failing, you have the drain on your resources of both refunding the business *and* the costs of keeping the woman alive and entertained.

[Harcourt]

p.s. Unless she actually has experience of the retail business, e.g. by being a shop manager, she will almost certainly mess things up. I've met countless Thai women who want to start a business. They think that all you have to do is sit in a shop all day and wait for money to arrive. When I have questioned them about how they intend to go about setting up and running their prospective business, they have not the faintest clue.

In my case, I extracted promises from the women that they would do what I told them with respect to setting up and running the business. Empty promises. As soon as things were up and running, I was treated to the "I know what to do so I don't need to listen to you" frame of mind.

Luckily, I anticipated many of the problems and so did not invest too much initially: about THB60,000 for the pet shop and THB100,000 for the clothing shop. The pet shop had an interesting legacy; a problem that I did *not* anticipate. When the woman stopped trading, our house was home to over 100 guinea pigs. When I broke off the relationship, she wanted to take them with her. I refused to allow this, on the grounds that she would have neither the time nor the money to take care of them and they would die an early death. So, since then, I have spent nearly a million baht over five years, just taking care of guinea pigs. Luckily, I am very fond of the little critters. I didn't allow them to breed, so the population has now dwindled to 13.

You suggest he pay 15 000 per month to his GF.

You pay nearly 17000 per month for guinea pigs.

It's a funny old world, isn't it.

[Lite Beer]

Off Topic Post Deleted.

[chrisartist]

You suggest he pay 15 000 per month to his GF.

You pay nearly 17000 per month for guinea pigs.

It's a funny old world, isn't it.

It certainly is. One would have thought that the monthly expense would have fallen as the population fell. In fact, that was not the case, because when I moved house to another city, the neighbours complained to the local authorities about the guinea pigs, so to prevent the local authorities taking the guinea pigs away I then had to incur a further monthly expense by renting a second house, just for the guinea pigs! :-)

[Soutpeel]

Guinea pigs.... Excellent...

Having seen a few collegues and friends set up business's for their GF's and wives...my advice go with the $150/month, it will be cheaper for you in the long run..

From what I have seen either the GF or wife is not cut out to run a business or gets bored of running it, either way generally more money is pumped in than what is coming out...

If she is serious, get her to make up a proper business plan and if this looks ok, suggests she is serious and thought things through from there you may decide its a viable idea..

Edited August 4, 2009 by Soutpeel

[StatlerandWaldorf]

my tgf want me to buy her a shop selling girls underware. would it be cheaper just to give her allowance of 150$ a month. i dont see her making much.

I predict that setting her up to sell underwear will be a massive and constant drain on your resources.

1) start-up costs:

----decorating the shop

----buying shelving, counter, etc.

----buying stock

----security deposit for shop rental (often very high, can be as much as 10 times the monthly rent, imposed by unscrupulous Thais)

2) Running costs:

----monthly rent, utilities, plus food and miscellanous living expenses because sales don't cover costs

----buying new stock when she can't sell the old stock, on the grounds that underwear is a fashion item and you have to keep up with the times, even when you didn't sell your original stock when it was still fashionable

3) Miscellaneous problems:

----she will probably choose a poor location for the shop

----she will probably give massive discounts on items just to get rid of stock

----she will not keep good inventory

----she will not keep accurate accounts

----she will spend all her time in the shop in the erroneous belief that longer hours automatically mean more sales; as a result, you will never see her.

Speaking from experience, dude; did it twice (first time pets, second time clothing), but never again.

Give her THB15,000 a month to cover everything except food that she eats with you (nights out with friends, sick buffalo, parents' leaking roof, brother's drug problem, hospital expenses for sick mother who doesn't work, food for sister and niece because her husband left her, etc.)

I am with Chrisartist on this one, I also have experience in retail and all the problems he points out are valid. It is highly possible that the costs far outweigh the profits. If she finds a good location then the rent will likely be hugely inflated.

Another issue, if relevant, is staff. If she employs staff then expect all sorts of trouble, examples: Turning up late, not turning up at all, stealing, charging wrong prices for items, disappearing after the first months salary, when it is spent coming back and expecting the job to be still open.

Of course we are all assuming that she is going for a proper shop rather than a Thai style rented shop house or simple market stall. I have a sister in law who has tried these things and the margins are so low that you must have high volume to make anything at all.

I am not saying it can't work because people do make these things work, but go into it with your eyes open and ideas of the potential issues and pitfalls.

Good luck, whatever you choose.

[cdnvic]

An allowance? How did she support herself before?

If you are paying her, the correct term is not "girlfriend".

[Moonrakers]

I was once asked to invest in a salon by a girl who was not my GF. I had no intention of doing so but played along for a bit anyway.

I asked questions such as How much is the rent? What equipment is needed and at what cost? How much are overheads etc.? Of course these questions where met with a blank expression and it was even suggested that I find out myself.

Then of course I asked "So how do I get my money back?". My 'interest' stopped there.

[StatlerandWaldorf]

forgot to say.

i gave money to a previous g/f to start a business with her sister an law...yes it failed and i lost the money.

BUT i didn't get involved at all and let them run away with the idea....

In hindsight i should have controlled it but that was due to my inexperience..

You need to be in on every decision made.

Absolutely. If you didn't work for the money to begin with then it is no loss right?

I have given money to my wife's family to buy pigs (no guinea pigs yet ), cows and God knows what else (not large amounts I might add). Of course when they get bored with taking care/breeding the animals they just sell the lot and continue to do whatever it is they spend all day doing out in the village. They have lost nothing, they have only made money selling the animals for a fraction of what they should have. But who cares, the money came for for nothing anyway. Dammit, you don't even have to do anything with the cows! just put them out in a field in the morning and then put them away at night, they eat grass all day for God's sake.

This is often what happens when you try to give people some financial independence, they want the independence but don't want to actually do anything to attain it.

These are just some of my experiences and everyone has different ones but I am sure there are many people out there who have had similar ones to myself.

[sanook2me]

just noticed the Op is now banned after 2 posts

I thought it was one of the more interesting posts today.... must have been a bad boy on another ID???

Lots of interesting tales about farangs losing money in small Thai business ventures this includes myself..

But if someone is giving an allowance to a girl why not give some more small change if they can afford it and give a girl a chance...IMHO

[IanForbes]

Not all new Thai businesses fail. A friend of mine helped out a Thai woman starting a laundry business and it has steadily grown. They started out as platonic friends and now have been happily married for 4 years. I support a family in Kanchanaburi. I helped them start a water, ice, and cold drink shop. It seems to be growing and holding its own. I have another friend who started a lady friend in a hair salon. Their business is doing okay. I've helped two young friends become hair dressers and they are doing okay.

Most of all it comes down to good money management and hard work. Not everyone is willing to sacrifice the effort it takes to get established and wait the two or three years before you start making a profit over and above the initial outlay.

In Canada, I financed my second ex-wife trying to start 12 different business. She always quit before we started making a return on my investment. It can happen anywhere in any country.

[cdnvic]

In Canada, I financed my second ex-wife trying to start 12 different business. She always quit before we started making a return on my investment. It can happen anywhere in any country.

You didn't get wary after the first 11?

[IanForbes]

An allowance? How did she support herself before?

If you are paying her, the correct term is not "girlfriend".

The same can be said for many marriages. You can look on it as charity with benefits. Why anyone would want to get married to anyone who doesn't have a similar financial investment is beyond me.

[IanForbes]

In Canada, I financed my second ex-wife trying to start 12 different business. She always quit before we started making a return on my investment. It can happen anywhere in any country.

You didn't get wary after the first 11?

Yes, but I was always hoping something would hold her interest. Most people have to try many things before they find something suitable. I know many men who have tried many careers and never found anything they liked long enough to stick with any one. I only invest what I can afford to lose. When it is a wife that you love dearly then you are more likely to try harder to make things work... and hope that they do. It's the rose coloured glasses syndrome. Eventually, a pattern begins to form and you have to accept reality... even if it hurts. Most of us learn the hard way. In my case I learned that my wife was a runner rather than a sticker. Her unfortunate 35 year old son is the same and he has never had a job that lasted more than 3 days. He's been on welfare for the rest of the time.

[noahvail]

Banned or not, the OP started an interesting thread.

My wife and I have been fortunate. I set her up in a clothing store. Spent 100,000 baht to set her up, fixtures, stock, etc. Told her I expected to see a return on my investment within a year. I figured she'd do ok because she has a good and interesting fashion sense, and also has the gift of gab. Her shop is situated between two other women's fashion shops. She felt she could make a go of it, and despite her lack of business experience, I went along with it.

Six months in, she's got about 120,000 baht of stock paid for, and she's starting to pay back the loan. She's selling more than either of the shops that flank her.

She's happier now than ever, has a much better sense of self-worth, and is making a lot more than her less-than-slave-wages working as a social worker for an NGO.

Long hours aren't the answer. Most of her business comes between 4 and 8 at night, except on the weekends, when it's hit or miss during each day. So most days, she's able to close up, take and hour or two off, and spend some time with me.

Like I said, we're very fortunate that it's working out. Even if it goes belly up, she's had a good ride, and will come out better for the experience.

[Birdman]

That's a nice story. Only part not understandable is the "loan", which was given by who?

Edited August 4, 2009 by Birdman

[khundon]

150$ a month???

Tight wad.

[kyb789]

An allowance? How did she support herself before?

If you are paying her, the correct term is not "girlfriend".

Someone please put this in BOLD and neon font. If Thai families are so tight and important, why is she coming to you for money? Family first, right?

In the U.S, 9 out of 10 businesses fail. That is even higher in Thailand. Don't be a fool. If she is coming to you for money, she is dating you for the wrong reason. Raise your self-esteem and expectation to your own social class. You will find many hi quality Thai girls that want nothing from you but your love.

[G54]

I set one of my g/f up with a salon. Cost me 30,000 to take over the salon and give it to her.

I never did get the capital investment back but she did make a profit every month. The profit was small by our standards - 4-5K a month - but for her it gave her freedom.

The main drawback was not seeing her for most of the day unless I went to the salon. When she got home after a 12 hour day she was tired - though she spent enough time asleep on the sofa in the shop as she waited for customers

What to do?

Have her at home all day, bored, watching television, pottering about and getting under your feet or giving her a chance to do something with her life?

Most Thai women - unlike the men (so it seems) - relish going out to work and doing their bit. It also gives them some pride too.

I would giver her the opportunity but put safeguards in place and keep a good eye on the business.