What about a private investigator?

[anthemite]

Situation is this:

Met a girl, think she is wonderful, want to increase contact with her, make a closer relationship.

BUT she is younger than me, met her on the internet before dating, know she still flirts around on the web, and I just can't tell how truthful she is about her lifestyle.

I can't keep an eye on her myself right now, and I refuse to get burned!!!! But my heart is starting to slip, and I want to find out the truth before I burn myself.

Can anyone recommend a solid, honest, legal, Bangkok-area Private Investigation or detective service that could take a few days and settle this?

Thanks,

Ant.

[george]

Contact Warren at Thai Private Eye

[jjrbus]

Of course she is wonderful, they are all wonderful until you marry them Is it Angie or Pim? Maybe we can compare notes.

                          Jim

[Sunbelt Asia]

I agree also George, Thaiprivateeye.com knows his business.

[kwiz117]

Does not make sense to me. What are you going to Investigate?

How can you based on your relationship with her from a word of a so called Investigator unknown to you.

If you can not trust what she say, then how can you expect her to be same? Sorry, this is not to offend you.

What if the Investigator happens to be the Uncle, or Brother of this girl?      

In my opinion, just come to Thailand and spend some time with her. That will make a world of a difference.  :cool:

I am in Thailand as a result of a Dating Site and Internet Chat. As you think, many many cases here in this forum describes how Foreigners got cheated. Remember, thai Girls also get cheated by Farang. Obviously that side of the story no one interested.

:cool:

[Begs]

Spot on Kwiz.

[chuang]

How can you ever start a relationship with her in the first  

place if you don't even trust her.

Yeah do what kwiz has suggested, spend some time with

her and find out for yourselves.

If you were to ask the folks here most of them will say she

is out to 'get you'.....Good luck..   :cool:

[Begs]

How can you ever start a relationship with her in the first  

place if you don't even trust her.

Yeah do what kwiz has suggested, spend some time with

her and find out for yourselves.

If you were to ask the folks here most of them will say she

is out to 'get you'.....Good luck..   :cool:

Another spot on Post chuang.

Certainly dont ask the guy's here, find out for yourself. But you must realise that any long distance relationship is gonna always be casting doubt's in your mind, especially the mind of a guy that wants to hire a Pvt detective. I met some girls from internet, good girls, educated girls, even Rich girls, one girl became very special to me, and i still  contact others i have met in the past and we remain close friends to this day.

So my advice for what it's worth is meet her, see what happens, keep an open mind, maybe you will at least make a nice friend, even if you dont find Love.

Good luck anyway.

[anthemite]

I have gone through the exact thoughts that many of you have posted as responses. I have thought "should I even consider going forward at all if I do not trust her?" I have thought "can I trust a private investigator who I have never met before?"

And I truly agree with others who have replied that "no one considers all the Farang that have hurt good Thai women". I assure you, that too rolls through my head.

But having said all that, I still have to do what is best for my situation.

Have I begun to fall in love with her? Yes.

Are there plenty of other girls in Thailand who I could find? Sure, but sometimes love blinds you to the others, and only this one matters.

Do a fair percentage of attractive young Thai women in Bangkok already have boyfriends, try to date or marry Farang for money, or prostitute themselves? I think we all know the answer to that...

So do I "go with the flow" and just not care about that? I will be in Thailand again in 2 or 3 months, but I will not leave my job in the US until I find something or build something in Thailand, which seems to be a year or two away.

So why shouldn't I try to protect myself? Don't you all think that sometimes, you have to use your head (the one on your shoulders), even when your heart pulls you to trust someone blindly?

[taxexile]

for what its worth.

its the separation thats driving you crazy with all kinds of thoughts.

if it will put your mind at rest then have her checked out.

make sure you meet her friends and her family when you get here, if you havent done so already.

that could tell you more about her than anything else.

dont be scared about getting hurt.

as they say

its better to have loved and lost,than to never have loved at all.

[Begs]

for what its worth.

its the separation thats driving you crazy with all kinds of thoughts.

if it will put your mind at rest then have her checked out.

make sure you meet her friends and her family when you get here, if you havent done so already.

that could tell you more about her than anything else.

dont be scared about getting hurt.

as they say

its better to have loved and lost,than to never have loved at all.

Tax you old softy.....sniff...sniff.........I think i'm gonna cry.

[Thetyim]

I agree with Begs.

If you chuck her because you do not know whether she is honest or not then you will be wondering forever if you made the right decision.

The odds are against you, but if you have already fallen for this girl then carry on and find out for sure if she is right for you.

[taxexile]

Tax you old softy.....sniff...sniff.........I think i'm gonna cry.

thats me begs, kind words and a sympathetic ear,second nature to me.

[Jimmy Bangkok]

ant,

if you think shes not being truthful with you, and you wanna know without hiring a private eye, you said she flirts around on the net, then log in under a different name and talk to her,even flirt with her and see what she says. ive done it with girls ive met on the net, im sure youll find your answer.

[Mighty Mouse]

I'm old enough to remember Elvis singing, "suspicion, torments my heart, suspicion, keeps us apart, suspicion, why tortue me....."

Let's assume the worst.....

Let's assume this girl does have other men in her life, and let's assume your private investigator ascertains this and informs you.

What are you going to do next?

Are you going to timidly shuffle toward the exit door  and hopefully find a girl who is unattached.....

                                 

                                 OR

.....are you going to meet the challenge and show this girl that no matter how many men she may have in her life, there is no one better than you.

If you have what it takes, this girl will be attracted to you like an imitation baht coin to a magnet.

All that it takes is confidence in yourself and trust in her.

Remember this: If there is no trust in the relationship, there is no relationship.

[muay_thai]

Very wise words from Mighty Mouse.

I'm going through the same long distance thing at the moment and can only advise that if you dont trust her and always think bad then it's never going to work.

If you do trust her but be cautios(?) with your money then there is a chance it can work, thats all.

If she has got more than one guy and you still want her then your gonna have to prove it by making the effort in terms of spending time with her and see how she is.

I've got some doubts about my girl but I ain't gonna be looking back in 5years saying to myself "what if i'd have

believed her?", just try and enjoy it do your best by her

and fingers crossed ! Best of luck .

[Guest IT Manager]

Oh you guys are such a bunch of sooks.... good luck with her. Come visit don't waste money on investigating her. What does it matter. Does she have to live in cotton wool and be a virgin etc before you are interested. Are you? Get your butt over here and meet her you dummie.

I want pics of the wedding for my web site. Went to agood un yesterday. 60 year old foreigner, 18 year old girl. Been together 2 years. happy as pigs in shit. Scary I know but there it is. Gave us nice little japanese chopsticks. Her Mom and Dad organised the wedding, all her rellies helped out.

Excellent night. He is lucky but still ugly. she is cute as the nose on a rabbit. More reports in 3 months.

sniff sniff

[KevinN]

ANT. I don't know where the #### you are or the age of the people involved, But I have friends here in Thailand that I met on the chats,some have since moved to the states,but I have found the one for me right here,but not while still in the states,I can tell you one thing I have learned in all my years of travel and watching the marriages and foreign relationships,

Come here look her over and then make up your mind.If as you say,in the future you will want to live here,well and good,but when you inform her of it she might tell you to blow it out your ass,she wants to go stateside. so you haven't lost a #### thing,there are a lot of them that want a falang so they can go USA.Then you in for trouble.

Tho I have met them[like my wife] who wants a farang husband because of the better treatment they receive from some of us,but she don't want to move to America,she is happy here,if I wanted to go then she would go with me,but I am happy here also and we have a nice home,she works everyday as a school teacher,she will retire in 4 years. so you see that I am not like most Farang,most are borderline pedophile.

But I don't see a Sam Spade getting you a wife,if you wanted a cow,you would go out and buy one,do the same thing with your woman,choose her for yourself. no matter what she is doing now,she might be a real doll once you are here,do you expect her to be in a convent just because you SAY you are coming here? she pobly ain't a fool,which she would be if she put her trust in what you tell her on the net,throws away all her fish bait,you don't show and she got to start fishing all over again.

[KevinN]

OH by the way, a few years ago,I carried on with a Chinese lady,everything sounded swell and I thought that we would hit it off great, But due to the wisdom of the US INS. I  went to china for the face to face as is required before a fiancée visa can be issued, I spent 2 weeks there,and I loved china and the people,but I couldn't wait to get away from her,she was about the most bossy woman I have ever met,clean and not a bad cook and housekeeper,but just bossy and the same with the servicepeople in the cafes and stores,mouth off at others, I wouldn't have lived with her for 5 minutes. So when I got ready to come her,I made some friends on the web and came,looked around for a few months got settled in and then found a wife,and I probably married one of the finest women alive today, we are very happy with each other.

[kiwiexpat]

Hi Ant,

I have 2 experiences with so called PI's here and unfortunately both were rogues, took the money and then no result and no further communication. The first one a guy called Mark Prado asked for up front 10,000 Bht and then could not find the apartment where my wife was living, then came back and said that his agents were too tired after working on an out of town case........12 months ago no result and no money refunded...

Second, another American - goes by the name of Thom Winter ( I heard he uses other aliases) same modus operandum send a few reports by email and no pics, intially advanced 8,000 Bht and then wanted another 8,000 Bht and will not answer phone calls or emails, I have lodged a rport with the Lumpini Police for the latter and hopefully it will come to a satisfactory conclusion soon..

Good luck but be aware of the two above mentioned...

[GuestHouse]

Possessive befor you even start a relationship - go talk to someone about that.

[HarryHacker]

Umm, a 4 year old topic with 3 banned members and one ex-admin banged up.

Edited November 6, 2007 by HarryHacker

[sriracha john]

and apparently re-opened out of the blue only to dish out dirt on a couple of PI's.....

with a feigned "helpful response" to a poster who hasn't been back online with Thaivisa in 4 years.