Hard Time Living In Western Culture

[WilliamCave]

Hi was woundering if anyone else has a hard time going back to there western country of orgin. I work with many guys in the oil patch of Albera and most of us can not wait for our turn around to be able to get back to thailand. I have no desire to live in Canada anymore and neither do most of them.

What is it? I noticed that I can talk to them and we talk about Asia and seem no one around us understands us.

So what did asia do to me and many others like me? Is it thailand, has a heart beat, people really live,?

The culture shock that hit me the first time I came back to Canada after 2 years and western cultures arent what I thought it was as taught from a baby.

My opinion that western countries are the best countries to live in is bu@@ sh@@ feed to us from our govts for years.

I try explainig to many friends here and they dont understand me when I tell them things here are not as they apear.

Woundering others expereiences on this..

[Latindancer]

I like both Australia and Thailand for different reasons. The environment and infrastructure in Australia are great, but people are more aggressive ( especially on the roads ). Compared to here, there are way more smokers (who I hate being near, even outside), and Australian peoples' various neuroses dismay me. According to 2 Brazilians I know, Aussies are very reserved socially and seem to be walking around in their own little bubbles. I agree.

It is wonderful to come here to Thailand because of the different culture and openly friendly people who dislike confrontation. But the environment is not always so enjoyable for me......there are not many public parks, streets are dusty etc.

I'va always described the situation to my friends like this :

When you go overseas, it's wonderful to get away from the particular brand of craziness and neuroses in the people of your own country. You get overseas and see the new ways people do things, some of which are superior to your home country......then after a while you start to see the negative things. Just look at all the complaints people have here on Thaivisa ! The first time I came here, I got culture shock. But not these days. However going back home, I always get reverse culture-shock....every time !

No-one can say that either Western countries or Eastern countries are better to live in. It's up to the individual, according to what they themselves value.

Edited November 30, 2009 by Latindancer

[motoyen]

What is it you don't like about Canada? Not trying to start a flame war but I'm curious.

[villagefarang]

I wouldn't worry about it too much. It is all part of the process and yes many people experience what you are feeling these days.

Try to refrain from being too evangelical about your love for all things Thai and distain for all things western. Just be happy with your lot and let others continue to think they are happy with theirs. No need to rub it in or be too critical. It won't help you and it won't change them.

Besides, your own feelings will ebb and flow over time. Just enjoy where you are right now.

[WilliamCave]

What is it you don't like about Canada? Not trying to start a flame war but I'm curious.

It is not that I dont like Canada , it is just not for me anymore. The social systems that I pay in to in Canada I can not have access to because of what I make, weather, poitics, corrption on a massive scale, cost, Maybe it is the not liking living in a bubble anymore. And I dont believe Canada is all that it is made out to be. Fell in love with asia after being there now for over 6 years. Like the weather, food people. Can go out at night and eat at many stalls. just the atmosphire in general. And when I want to go some were to another country it is not far to get there an hour or 2 in a plane. From here it is far to anywere else in the world except the US.

Are u from canada motoyen?

[ES1]

What is it you don't like about Canada? Not trying to start a flame war but I'm curious.

It is not that I dont like Canada , it is just not for me anymore. The social systems that I pay in to in Canada I can not have access to because of what I make, weather, poitics, corrption on a massive scale, cost, Maybe it is the not liking living in a bubble anymore. And I dont believe Canada is all that it is made out to be. Fell in love with asia after being there now for over 6 years. Like the weather, food people. Can go out at night and eat at many stalls. just the atmosphire in general. And when I want to go some were to another country it is not far to get there an hour or 2 in a plane. From here it is far to anywere else in the world except the US.

Are u from canada motoyen?

Corruption? If you want to know what REAL corruption is get to know Thailand better. There is practically nothing in Canada that compares.

I do know what your going through. I live in Western Canada and went through EXACTLY what your going through. I mostly agree with what your saying about how the Western world (not just Canada) starts to look a lot different after having seen life from the other side. You'll get over it. I spent several months in Thailand once and have been there many times. I mostly got Thailand out of my system now. Still think about living there and leaving Canada far behind but it doesn't eat away at me like it did before. Still go there for holidays and that's good enough now. I know lot's of guys who have taken the plunge and moved there permanently. Almost without exception the novelty wears off. Eventually the little annoyances of Thailand start to get to them and they start missing the western world. Perhaps not enough to move back but it kind of evens out after awhile as it will for you. So it's not all good vs bad.

My advice is if you can find the time/money, spend as much time as you can in Thailand (as I'm sure you will) and get it out of your system. The novelty will wear off so just enjoy it while it still seems fresh and exciting. As you get to know Thailand better you'll learn to appreciate how lucky you are to be a citizen of Canada. You will realized that Thailand is great if you have lot's of money but not much fun without money. In Canada, you can still have a very good life without much money because of our social safety nets which are practically non-existant in Thailand. Many Thais work long hours 6 days a week for terrible wages but in Canada we have much better opportunities. That is one thing I learned to appreciate.

Let me give you a couple facts. The entire country of Thailand is smaller than the province of Alberta and yet it has more than twice the population of all of Canada. They of course have more problems with air pollution and other things that would come with that much higher density. So in Canada we are blessed with lot's of wide open spaces, clean air and water etc.

Edited November 30, 2009 by ES1

[mizzi39]

What is it you don't like about Canada? Not trying to start a flame war but I'm curious.

It is not that I dont like Canada , it is just not for me anymore. The social systems that I pay in to in Canada I can not have access to because of what I make, weather, poitics, corrption on a massive scale, cost, Maybe it is the not liking living in a bubble anymore. And I dont believe Canada is all that it is made out to be. Fell in love with asia after being there now for over 6 years. Like the weather, food people. Can go out at night and eat at many stalls. just the atmosphire in general. And when I want to go some were to another country it is not far to get there an hour or 2 in a plane. From here it is far to anywere else in the world except the US.

Are u from canada motoyen?

Thailand has its fair share of corruption on a massive scale and it is not always what it is made out to be, so hopefully you are returning with eyes wide open.

Living full time in a mono culture especially where i live in the sticks has its ups and equally its downs. Xenophobia is much higher once you make a turn out of touristville and unless you are Thai or at least half Thai you will be tolerated but never fully accepted, so a strong constitution and a small pocket of trustworthy friends is a must.

I hope that i am not preaching to the choir, just speaking from personal experience. Will be taking the wife and our son to the States for a vacation in April. Have not been back for 3 years. Maybe i will have a different perspective upon my return to LOS, but as the old saying goes, "The grass is always greener on the other side"

[jackr]

I could understand someone escaping the U.S. or the U.K. for Thailand but not really Canada.

I dunno, I'd much rather be back in the UK drinking real beer in a genuine pub than mincing around in plastic mountyland.

Canada is superior in just about every cost of living, living standard...

No it ain't and no it ain't... one is clearly missing the point here and even if those were true, you're forgetting one thing; it's completely 'kin boring.

[dttk0009]

<< flame removed>> Canada is superior in just about every cost of living, living standard, and employment comparison out there. It's a beautiful country with pleasant people. I could understand someone escaping the U.S. or the U.K. for Thailand but not really Canada.

Anyhow, I have a large desire to live abroad but my work keeps me here momentarily. I've spent a grand total of maybe 3 years of my life in the western world, living mostly in Thailand. I do get a chance to travel there occasionally, but still have not managed to move. To be honest, I wouldn't really know what to expect. I'm so used to how things are here. I certainly would like the cooler weather!

[F1fanatic]

<< flame removed>> Canada is superior in just about every cost of living, living standard, and employment comparison out there. It's a beautiful country with pleasant people. I could understand someone escaping the U.S. or the U.K. for Thailand but not really Canada.

I disagree. Its 'cos the women think he's 'so hansum' and 'love him too much' - nothing to do with the women being extremely available.

Don't burst his bubble.

[Meridian007]

I don't know, I think that the more you travel, the more everywhere seems the same. I love Canada, even the little hick town I grew up in (for you Canucks, Brantford. If you know hockey, you know Brantford, but it was a dump in the 70s, 80s and 90s. It's cleaned up a bit, which I'm glad to see). There are clean, open parts and dirty, overpopulated parts (look to Hamilton and Windsor).

But after three years living here in Thailand, I do miss Ottawa, Victoria, and Jasper Park the most. I wouldn't want to live there in the winter, but if I could do what IanForbes does, (look up his posts on here), I would. As it is, I could live here, or I could live in Canada. I'd be happy in either place. They both have their particular charms, and their own types of corruption, frustrating social issues, work issues, and relationship issues.

For me, the weather tends to be the main issue. Cold, dry winters with overly wet and cold spring/fall weather means that I get sick a lot more in Canada than I do here. The past three years have made an amazing change to my health. If I moved out of Bangkok, it could be even better.

Culturally, I don't see too much of a difference between the two. Both tend to be peaceful and generally friendly, there are some relationship disconnects between the cultures, along with a few other issues. I think it becomes a love/hate thing. I like that there are not as many regulations here to restrict me, but I hate when that same legal flexibility allows for some of the domestic violence and other social "ills" here. I think those of us that are lucky enough to spend enough time here, replace our western hang-ups for eastern hang-ups, or a hybrid of the two. It is a personal decision for each person, and unlike ES1, I think I'm happier living here most of the time, and visiting Canada for a little while each year. To each their own.

And Jackr, I have to disagree with your last point. It is the person that makes life interesting, not the place. You know the line "If you're bored, you're boring"...

[livinthailandos]

I've been here in thailand off and on 5 years lately though going on being here 2 years without returning to the USA. To be honest I've got everything here that I can get back home ( material items though )

Since I'm working here in thailand though I'm in a way happier even now than before at least I still have a job. Everyone I know from back home has either

lost their job, & can't find a job or

been moved to a part time basis

I know that sounds strange but I rather enjoy the job and keeps me busy. After being here for a while I've saved money, and really I have good company benefits

I rather like being here more than being back in the USA. To many people back home have such a narrow view on the international world, at least living abroad and learning new things and seeing new cultures has greatly helped expand my views on many things.

In all you may have a hard time living here but i don't I'll stay here as long as possible

[yabaaaa]

Come on you have earnt a lot of money in the west and when you come here life is so much cheaper. If you had been born here you would probably have had little education and no job prospects. So would you still be happy? Many Thais long to get to the west to earn what they see as big bucks.

[F1fanatic]

I've been here in thailand off and on 5 years lately though going on being here 2 years without returning to the USA. To be honest I've got everything here that I can get back home ( material items though )

Since I'm working here in thailand though I'm in a way happier even now than before at least I still have a job. Everyone I know from back home has either

lost their job, & can't find a job or

been moved to a part time basis

I know that sounds strange but I rather enjoy the job and keeps me busy. After being here for a while I've saved money, and really I have good company benefits

I rather like being here more than being back in the USA. To many people back home have such a narrow view on the international world, at least living abroad and learning new things and seeing new cultures has greatly helped expand my views on many things.

In all you may have a hard time living here but i don't I'll stay here as long as possible

Unfortunately its (on the whole) only some Americans who "have such a narrow view on the international world". The rest of the Western community have some idea what is going on internationally.

[dumball]

yabaaaa' date='2009-11-30 19:13:31' post='3174581']

Come on you have earnt a lot of money in the west and when you come here life is so much cheaper. If you had been born here you would probably have had little education and no job prospects. So would you still be happy? Many Thais long to get to the west to earn what they see as big bucks.

I have to agree with yabaaaa the most , take away the education and the money you were afforded in your own country , then rethink your thinking , so many cry down their own country and forget who gave them the opportunity to be whom they are today .The older you are , the less those would have been in Thailand , and the older you become ? 'Nuff said ' ,

Go look at the long line ups at embassies of thousands hoping to make it Öutahere".

[GuestHouse]

Ah those oil dollars and the great things they can buy in Thailand.

Just don't forget to keep enough to one side to pay for the flight home.

[lovelomsak]

I am a retired canuck living in Thailand. I wouldnot move back to Canada for anything.I was a single man there outside the loop here I am a single man who is made a part of anything going on. In Canada single men like me are left out to dry no one cares a sh#t about us. Work all our lives pay tax get no respect. If we marry in canada the wife divorces us takes everything and everyone says serves you right you are a man.

In Canada I had sailboat on the salt water,powerboat on the lake ,ocean view property on Vancouver island , could see Vancouver from my living room window,on 1/2 an acre of land, new car in driveway all paid for debt free. Money in tha bank.

Here I drive a nissan pickup but mostly a honds wave. Rent a 2 bedroom townhouse.

I would never return. Thailand has brought laughter back into my day, it has brought sharing and caring as everyday events.I am so happy here. I cannot remember when I was as happy in Canada,it was so long ago.

Canada is smoke and mirrors. The land of followers. The land of the living dead. Schools and hospitals being closed all over the place and taxes going up. All social programs are just employments centers for government workers the public gets nothing.

Unemployment insurance would rather pay a lawyer to fight you in court than give you your benefits,same goes for workers compensation. Try to get an xray in a clinic or hospital you will be there all day and come back another day to see the with your doctor.

Political correctness and womens lib handcuff you.

Corruption is the king and to survive most associate and become corrupt or be left out side the loop. Violence is everywhere,tough guys rule. It is said in some BC communities one 1 in 3 residential houses is a grow op of some form for cannabis not all communties just some.

so do you like my rant so far?

Enough said but I love it here.

[dumball]

lovelomsok , just about everything you say is the opposite of what living in Canada is , in reality , what a bitter and twisted person you have become , it is one of the best countries to live in overall , with all kinds of things to do and sports to partake of .

Should lieing through your teeth make you feel good , so be it .

[RoastLamb]

What is it?

It's a combination of the girls and the uneasy feeling that there will inevitably come a time when you have to leave.

[lovelomsak]

lovelomsok , just about everything you say is the opposite of what living in Canada is , in reality , what a bitter and twisted person you have become , it is one of the best countries to live in overall , with all kinds of things to do and sports to partake of .

Should lieing through your teeth make you feel good , so be it .

so where you from ? I amnot used to being caklled a liar by someone who doesnot know me . Iam just telling it like it is you must live in a vacuum

Or are you just another canuck living in denial

Please be polite enough to point out where you think I am wrong. You are quite right about sports I used to race my sailboat regularly and cruised all the way up to Alaska was active on the water a lot but sports donot make a complete life sorry to say.

Edited November 30, 2009 by lovelomsak

[Birdman]

Canada was and still is one of the most sought after countries worldwide to live. Even for Europeans. Would the chance/price to get a woman in Thailand be equal to Canada, I suppose many had no Hard Time Living In Western Culture.

[dumball]

'lovelomsak' date='2009-11-30 21:06:05' post='3174791']dumball' post='3174768' date='2009-11-30 21:54:57']lovelomsok , just about everything you say is the opposite of what living in Canada is , in reality , what a bitter and twisted person you have become , it is one of the best countries to live in overall , with all kinds of things to do and sports to partake of .

Should lieing through your teeth make you feel good , so be it .

so where you from ? I amnot used to being caklled a liar by someone who doesnot know me . Iam just telling it like it is you must live in a vacuum

Or are you just another canuck living in denial

Please be polite enough to point out where you think I am wrong. You are quite right about sports I used to race my sailboat regularly and cruised all the way up to Alaska was active on the water a lot but sports donot make a complete life sorry to say.

I most certainly do not live in a vacuum , I also do not belittle the countries that I have benifited so much from , I am also not a "Canuck ", but that is where we reared our children . I have no need to live in denial as so many posters appear to do , because I manage to live a happy life , where so ever the place is that I call home at any given time in my life .

You will note where I think you are wrong , merely by reading what I had written , that is if you did not leave your English skills in Canada with all of the other things you found to hate so much .

I am from a very warm and comfortable place , I have tried to live in that type of environment most of my life , my mother was a very warm and compassionate person . My mother also taught me to not disparage those whom had helped to improve my way of life or the skills they had instructed me in , but more to nurture their memory , I will be the person I become by means of their generosity in whatever form that may take .

Life is what you make of it , those of us who only have time and energy to constantly look down on what is available to us , instead of taking what oportunity there is available around us , will most likely finish up like your goodself .

Have a happier future .

[PhilHarries]

yabaaaa' date='2009-11-30 19:13:31' post='3174581']

Come on you have earnt a lot of money in the west and when you come here life is so much cheaper. If you had been born here you would probably have had little education and no job prospects. So would you still be happy? Many Thais long to get to the west to earn what they see as big bucks.

I have to agree with yabaaaa the most , take away the education and the money you were afforded in your own country , then rethink your thinking , so many cry down their own country and forget who gave them the opportunity to be whom they are today .The older you are , the less those would have been in Thailand , and the older you become ? 'Nuff said ' ,

Go look at the long line ups at embassies of thousands hoping to make it Öutahere".

These guys have spoke the truth. Go round Thailand and hunt down a Thai from a similar background and similar education as yourself and ask yourself whether you'd trade places. Chances are the answer is an emphatic NO and usually with f**kin' way added. Your greatest asset is your western education and your western passport. When the manure enters the airconditioning in a country like Thailand while all the locals have to sit tight and tough it out you will be back in your homeland regaling all and sundry in the pub with tales of how you escaped hel_l.

Sure we all have issues with our home country but in the final analysis you got out of the system probably far more than you put in and if that ain't enough for you then you didn't work hard enough when you had the chance. There's a sub-culture within ThaiVisa where people seem to compete with each other as to just how much and how badly they can slag off their home country. Well kids, if you all hate it so much just tear up your passport and your certificates and take up your true position in Thai society......the bottom.

I was living in Thailand ten years pretty well continuous before I had to return to the UK. Yes, things were different but that was more due to life moving on without me and I just had to do a bit of catching up. Many people on ThaiVisa claim that they are unable to resettle back in their home countries because they've become "too Asian". By and large this is wishful thinking and b*llsh*t, it's the sort of thing that would affect a child brought to a foreign country then going home as an adult. But if you have at least passed through university you are grounded in your home culture and would/will readjust within days of a return.

As for not looking forward to your R&R's in Canada and preferring Thailand well that's just a holiday, everybody in the world loves their overseas holiday and sheds a few tears when it's time to go home. All holidays have to come to an end and when they do you know where you have to go in order to earn the next one.

[thaiphoon]

One post containing flame deleted.

[dumball]

PhilHaries , you put both Yabaaas and my posts to shame when you regurgitated them in a far more eloquent manner , all I can add , is to forego returning to the country they have learned to hate so much for whatever reason and just tuff it out in the fantastic "KINGDOM OF LOS " , oh , and give all of their wealth to some needy charity or other , after all , it is so cheap to live in their new found paradise . LOL 555 ???

[MrHammer]

yabaaaa' date='2009-11-30 19:13:31' post='3174581']

Come on you have earnt a lot of money in the west and when you come here life is so much cheaper. If you had been born here you would probably have had little education and no job prospects. So would you still be happy? Many Thais long to get to the west to earn what they see as big bucks.

I have to agree with yabaaaa the most , take away the education and the money you were afforded in your own country , then rethink your thinking , so many cry down their own country and forget who gave them the opportunity to be whom they are today .The older you are , the less those would have been in Thailand , and the older you become ? 'Nuff said ' ,

Go look at the long line ups at embassies of thousands hoping to make it Öutahere".

These guys have spoke the truth. Go round Thailand and hunt down a Thai from a similar background and similar education as yourself and ask yourself whether you'd trade places. Chances are the answer is an emphatic NO and usually with f**kin' way added. Your greatest asset is your western education and your western passport. When the manure enters the airconditioning in a country like Thailand while all the locals have to sit tight and tough it out you will be back in your homeland regaling all and sundry in the pub with tales of how you escaped hel_l.

Sure we all have issues with our home country but in the final analysis you got out of the system probably far more than you put in and if that ain't enough for you then you didn't work hard enough when you had the chance. There's a sub-culture within ThaiVisa where people seem to compete with each other as to just how much and how badly they can slag off their home country. Well kids, if you all hate it so much just tear up your passport and your certificates and take up your true position in Thai society......the bottom.

I was living in Thailand ten years pretty well continuous before I had to return to the UK. Yes, things were different but that was more due to life moving on without me and I just had to do a bit of catching up. Many people on ThaiVisa claim that they are unable to resettle back in their home countries because they've become "too Asian". By and large this is wishful thinking and b*llsh*t, it's the sort of thing that would affect a child brought to a foreign country then going home as an adult. But if you have at least passed through university you are grounded in your home culture and would/will readjust within days of a return.

As for not looking forward to your R&R's in Canada and preferring Thailand well that's just a holiday, everybody in the world loves their overseas holiday and sheds a few tears when it's time to go home. All holidays have to come to an end and when they do you know where you have to go in order to earn the next one.

Cheers, good post! Many posters seem to forget that even the ability to slag off your own country isn't a given neither by law nor having the freedom of mind to think it.

I would think I would have a hard time to adapt but that has more to do with the cold, rainy climate than anything else. I much prefer to live in a hot climate were there's all sorts of things going on outside. Also, I think it's ok to critize the direction most of Europe has taken for example, into nanny state, big government, the system is everything state. The European Union., the loss of national and cultural pride. I think it's sad for example how we stuff our old away in old people home were they rot away and are happy to get a call once a week. Or how we pay insane amounts in taxes to pay for an endless rank of government paper pushers. Lot's of things need fixing in the West and I'm not sure I want to wait around for it to happen.

[emsfeld]

Tend to agree with OP's post. My 'issue' is that living in Western countries and cities tends to be a bit boring. There isnt the 24/7 action going on as you'd have in many Asian cities. I reckon that's something you either like or dislike - there is hardly a middle path.

[Meridian007]

It's always easier to live somewhere (and enjoy yourself) when your money goes farther. Is this a reason for being here? Sure, but not the only one. As I said, I still love Canada, and I enjoy going back to see my family and friends. I will probably have to go back for a while to take care of my parents, but I will return to Thailand after that. I like it here, I feel there is some sense to some of the the Thai cultural beliefs, just as much as the Canadian.

Of course it is only possible for me to do this because of what I built up in Canada. Do I owe Canada something for that? No. If we are talking money here, I have already payed my dues with the taxes that I have payed, especially on my income (I began paying income tax and the other "taxes" when I began working at 13, and I still pay it on income I make here).

I payed for it with things like the amounts that were taken out for benefits that I know I'll never get, such as a pension. The Canadian pension plan is getting sucker-punched by the number of baby boomers leaning on it increasing every year, and it is expected to fail soon. By the time I get to that age, (I've still got 27 years before I'm eligible, if they don't up the age again. I believe it's currently 65), the percentage of the cost of living that it will provide will be non-existent or truly laughable (as it is already becoming).

As to culture, there are aspects I don't understand from both, but I treasure the fact that I've traveled enough to see the faults in my own. No culture is perfect, even from those of you who proclaim the wonders of technology and industrialization coming from the west. Sure those things help you live your western life, but is your western life necessary? "Better"? The only way? How can you judge that the western way is better? Sure, you can argue that those in abject poverty would love to get a chance at a western life, but they'd be happy for anything that brings them out of abject poverty. Sure, those that have been encultured to look up to western modernism might have been programmed enough to strive for a chance to become an automaton in the western rat-race. That doesn't make western culture better, just different, and currently "trendy".

There are many Thais that I know that have enjoyed visiting the west, or living there while they studied, but would never choose to live in the west over Thailand. Why? Are they just ignorant of the wonders we can offer them? Are they just being stubborn traditionalists that are afraid of change? I would say no. They have just been brought up within their own culture, and a big part of that is the (almost unthinking) support of your own culture. A culture won't survive if it isn't supported by the people that are a part of it. Because of that, it is hard for any of us to see any deeply rooted problem with our own cultures, and even harder for us to believe that any other way could be nearly as good as our own.

Those of us that are here, and worry about our ability to reconnect with our own cultures might not be just trying to "look cool" because we've "gone native". Perhaps our experiences have shocked us enough to start to feel a glimmer of understanding for another culture, and that has shaken our assertion that only our way is the "right" way. I'm not bashing Canada, Canadian culture, "Democracy", Capitalism, or any of that. It's just that I've lived that already, so now I'm trying something different.

To truly try this something different, I'm trying to allow some of that western enculturation to fade. This might have repercussions in that I may experience culture shock when I have to live there for a long time again. I've felt it already when I've gone back, after a month of Canada, Thailand seems more "normal" to me. Is this because I'm having vacation pangs? I don't think so, it feels closer to the shock that I felt after my first month here. I'll probably have lived here for at least 5 years by the time I have to go back, (whatever deity willing, I'm hoping my parents will stay healthy for much longer than that), but I think that after my 3 years of living here (not visiting here) so far, I will have to get over culture shock when I go back. I don't think that is a bad thing, it's just a thing.

I know there will be those of you who will say that you lived here in a small shack by the rice patties in Nakhon Nowhere for 40 years, went back to your home country, and never had a moments problem of fitting back in. Good for you. That was obviously your goal, you were able to tenaciously hang onto your original cultural identity for all that time. I don't want to do that, I want to try something different, so my experience may not be the same as yours when I go back. Is that such a bad thing? Truly?

[cognos]

<< flame removed>> Canada is superior in just about every cost of living, living standard, and employment comparison out there. It's a beautiful country with pleasant people. I could understand someone escaping the U.S. or the U.K. for Thailand but not really Canada.

I disagree. Its 'cos the women think he's 'so hansum' and 'love him too much' - nothing to do with the women being extremely available.

Don't burst his bubble.

you might try not to be so bitter towards men..you are better and smarter than that, than to over generalize all the time..perhaps you should get over it and move on..

[bina]

But if you have at least passed through university you are grounded in your home culture and would/will readjust within days of a return.

have to disagree; and today i just got told by an american that i speak really good english; i said- of course, im from america. he said- you have an accent that couldnt be placed.

i havent a clue how to behave, what to talk about, where to go or what to do beurocratically, mentally, or in living daily action if i were to return to america. and no , it doesnt just 'snap back'. most of my adult life from age 21 was spent in a 'foreign' country, giving birth, raising my kids, living my life...

i can also say that everyone paints the 'new' country they move to in pink rosey colours- better weather, better food, nicer/straighter/more punctual/more laid back/darker/lighter/tastier/spicier/sweeter. after the honeymoon finishes, its like with your new husband, u suddenly see the potruding belly, the irritating habits in the morning, whatever.... if u still like that, then things are smooth.

people are forever asking me why i dont go back to the states since i have citizenship. i always say i dont have anything to go back to (not much family left, no work, money, land, house friends, social structure. id be just like an immigrant.)

on the other hand, i can say that where i live now certainly has its problems (probably more then most, and i dream of the day i could ever move to thailand to get away from the shit here) but i certainly know that thailand is probably same same but different.

im tempted to think that home is where the heart is; and that is changeable, with time and whom and what u meet. every country is exotic and wonderful until u see the underside, backside, wrong side of the track side of things...

bina

israel