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Posted

Hi All

I have a Thai wife, not under Thai law, and will likely move to Thailand later this year.

I was wondering if any of you long(er) term residents have come across/read a book called Thailand fever.

I bought and read it with my wife, sounds reasonable to me but wife says "some good, some BS!

If anybody has read it I would be interested in how they compare it with actual life in the LOS

Many thanks

Posted

I read it, albeit from a Thai man/farang woman perspective. I agree with your wife. Some of it made sense, some of it just seemed to just make excuses for bad behaviour for both Thai and Farang ways of doing things. Books like this imo are useful only for casual reading and reading with a pinch of salt. Some things useful, but using it as some kind of real guide would be crazy imo.

Plus, I dont believe a book can cover even just a general Thai perspective (when so many ladies have different backgrounds etc), and a general farang perspective (with even more diverse background). Of course its important to adapt and compromise in a relationship, and that in a mixed culture relationship that can be more of a challenge. But at times i felt the book was patronising and, as i said, made excuses for behaviour that may be unacceptable.

Posted

I read that book and always thought that it was not perfect, but a very good starting point for talking many things out. If the wife says some BS, that is fine, but she should be able to explain which parts are, in her opinion, BS. Simple!

TheWalkingMan

Posted
I bought and read it with my wife, sounds reasonable to me but wife says "some good, some BS!

Well, you should listen to your wife... :D

And what is a Thai wife, not under Thai law? :)

Posted

Throw it away and live your life how you want to. If you err, then you will learn from your mistakes. Be tolerant of your wife's mistakes and ask that she is tolerant of yours and you'll be fine.

Communication is the key. Don't be afraid to ask her questions no matter how trivial it may seem.

Best way pal.

Don't live your life according to someone else's 'gospel' or you'll wind up like a load of bitter folks on here who live their lives according to Stickman, Thailand Fever etc....

Posted
If you err, then you will learn from your mistakes..

Well, you know Confucius saying, PF, "Experience is a light hooked on your back that only lights up the way you went through" :)

Posted

Understand that most books are written to sell copies... and not necessarily to tell the truth.

I should know. I am a writer and so is my sister. My sister just works harder at it and is more successful.

Posted
Understand that most books are written to sell copies... and not necessarily to tell the truth.

I should know. I am a writer and so is my sister. My sister just works harder at it and is more successful.

I read the book and as far as I am concerned it is total B S unless you want to give up any sense of individuality or any of the principles you were brought up with in a western world. Not saying they are better but am not discounting them either.

Posted
I read the book and as far as I am concerned it is total B S unless you want to give up any sense of individuality or any of the principles you were brought up with in a western world. Not saying they are better but am not discounting them either.

Your principles can sometimes change 180 degrees from what you once thought was a fact. Unless you've had a very sheltered life, the older you get the more you realize this can be so.

Posted
Throw it away and live your life how you want to. If you err, then you will learn from your mistakes. Be tolerant of your wife's mistakes and ask that she is tolerant of yours and you'll be fine.

Communication is the key. Don't be afraid to ask her questions no matter how trivial it may seem.

Best way pal.

Don't live your life according to someone else's 'gospel' or you'll wind up like a load of bitter folks on here who live their lives according to Stickman, Thailand Fever etc....

Agreed, and it also applies to taking advice from forums.

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