Finding A Wedding Outfit

[skyhi]

My brother is getting married in 2 weeks in Khon Kaen. My name is on the invitation plus I am giving a speech so I want to be dressed in a way that shows respect... my questions are these: could i get away with a western outfit? What kind of Thai outfit should I wear and where can I buy or hire one? (I have an image of a belted long skirt and lacey, ornate top - is this the right style?)

All advice much appreciated!

[lioness]

You can get away with a Western outfit, or you can basically wear anything that is smart. Hiring or buying will depend on your size and whats available in your area.

A Thai silk tailored sarong with a lacy top would be smart enough and blend in with Thai style without having the upper parts also in Thai silk which makes it a bit hot. I have several of these outfits that I can mix and match and they always look good.

You probably have time to get one made, visit your local dressmakers.

Basically I think smart without flashing off too much flesh which could be offensive to some traditional Thais.

[tigerfish]

when my wife and i got married, thai wedding. the whole family took a trip to pow hu-lat, a little sub district near yar wa-lat(china town). cheap and very affordable authentic thai wedding outfits. beautiful in design, taloired to size, with attention to detail.

might be worth looking the place up if you are in and around bangkok.

[sbk]

My nephew got married and I will have to admit, I just wore a western style dress. But, the traditional Thai dress would go down a treat with the inlaws and earn your brother brownie points I'd think. Extra bonus if you can make some comments in your speech in Thai as well.

[MiG16]

all valid points, but it is also worth knowing where the wedding is going to be? ie at home or in a hotel

also, in some cases your age does play a role

I will explain (not being age-ist )

but even in thai society, not all in the bride and groom's family would wear too traditional thai style dresses.

for instance Im not sure when you say lace and sarong - do you mean a blouse made of lace, or were you intending what is shown in this link? http://www.phahurat.com/shop/p/phahurat/im...026154459_b.jpg

(if the one in image - then no)

my suggestion would be: use thai silk but tailor made as a western style would also work very well.

something similar to this perhaps: http://www.phahurat.com/shop/p/phahurat/im...208173923_b.jpg

(but need not be the printed skirt with plain top...can both be plain silk with or without the thai style print on the silk)

or this one: http://img.alibaba.com/photo/107489265/Tha..._dress.summ.jpg (a bit small sorry!)

cheers

[richard_smith237]

Having recently got married I would suggest the following....

You are a westerner, so wear what you would in a western country (summer wedding).

I suggested this to my Sisters and Mother (and of course, no black).

With respect we are not Thai, we are Westerners (English etc) and ought not to pretend otherwise.

I have been to many weddings and always think that the Westerners; men and women, look daft when they wear the Thai style dress to formal or social functions. To the point when I see Western men in those Thai style white wedding outfits and think they look particularly daft.

I would suggest:

If the wedding is in the day time in the countryside (outside of Bangkok), a nice summer dress will suffice.

If the wedding is at an International hotel in Bangkok (cocktail wedding), then a cocktail dress will be suitable.

Or, somewhere in between....

Edited March 25, 2010 by richard_smith237

[tigerfish]

one thing, wear something very comfortable, loose and lets lots of air in.

thai wedding ceremonies can be very long drawn out affairs, and theres a lot of chanting and kneeling to be done too. as i found out to my cost when i got hitched. another thing be polite but dont be shy, especially when it comes to the food. again as i found out to my cost. we had laid on a real spread for all the guests, while i and the wife were making our offerings to the monks towards the end of the ceremony, the guests had all buggered off to feed their faces. finally when we were done, went to go and tuck into some of the 5 ducks that id bought for the occasion, and theyed all been eaten

Edited March 25, 2010 by tigerfish

[lioness]

Having recently got married I would suggest the following....

You are a westerner, so wear what you would in a western country (summer wedding).

I suggested this to my Sisters and Mother (and of course, no black).

With respect we are not Thai, we are Westerners (English etc) and ought not to pretend otherwise.

I have been to many weddings and always think that the Westerners; men and women, look daft when they wear the Thai style dress to formal or social functions. To the point when I see Western men in those Thai style white wedding outfits and think they look particularly daft.

I would suggest:

If the wedding is in the day time in the countryside (outside of Bangkok), a nice summer dress will suffice.

If the wedding is at an International hotel in Bangkok (cocktail wedding), then a cocktail dress will be suitable.

Or, somewhere in between....

Wearing Thai silk or any other Thai style design is not pretending to be Thai. Thai silk was introduced to the world a long time ago but really bought to the fore by Jim Thompson, it is a beautiful material. I do see Western men in a Thai silk shirt on occassions and they do look very smart, I guess I must look daft a lot because I love Thai style and as we attend many top end functions I always dress to the occassion, I am told it is appreciated, I blend in and why not enjoy the delights of Thai fashion after all this is my home and my adopted country.

[sbk]

I don't wear Thai silk, no occasion too, but I don't think it looks daft at a special occasion. But miggie has a point, if this is a simple country wedding, then it will be totally out of place to wear a fancy dress, if its in a hotel, then go for it but remember that its the bride's day to shine, so dress down a bit.

[Yunnie]

Khon Kaen... Issan area. You do much better going with a more ethnically Lao outfit. lol

But as the sister to the groom, you are EXPECTED to be more dressy even if guests arent. Also youre participating in the wedding so yes do dress up. You can wear western or Thai/Isan style, as long as it is in good taste. But as a family member, I think you should wear something more traditional.

Is the bride's family ethnically Lao Isan? Or are they Thai? That kinda helps to know because then you can pick the appropriate style of weaving phasin.

What you could do is just have your measurements taken and sent to Khon Kaen, and have the bride's family pick you the phasin and fabric for the top and have it tailored there. Also have them make it to the measurements, but inside have enough fabric saved (inside for the top - where the seams are stitched together - about an Inch each side is good) incase it needs to be altered.

Another issue would be your age and the style that works best for you.

If you decided to pick on youre own, hopefully these links will help. They are Lao style but should find something close enough to resemble it for an Isan wedding.

Pha sin weaving style doesnt have to be exact but similar enough to this. Although I prefer more Vientiane style. Its shiny only at the gold and silver threads, but not completely shiny like central Thai style. lol

If you decide not to do a pha sin... You can fall back to something like This. In blue would be the way to go.

[skyhi]

thank you for all your advice. in answer to your questions i am 26; the wedding is during the day in a village in khon kaen; the family is thai-isaan. actually i am making my speech entirely in thai, and wonder if, considering that, i shouldnt wear something western (i'm thinking the more comfortable i am, the better i'll pull it off!). i guess i should cover my shoulders in any case?

http://www.phahurat.com/shop/p/phahurat/im...026154459_b.jpg this link is the kind of outfit i was originally referring to. would be very keen to find a store where i could try on several varieties and find one thats comfortable!

many thanks

[sbk]

That seems awfully dressy to me, but then I am not up on Isaan weddings. I will defer to those who have been to one.

[Yunnie]

Hmm that outfit is very central Thai.

You can get away with a pha sin of that print but you want it cut in the "folded over" style and not the central Thai style. Folded over style is this

The top is just a long piece of cloth that is wrapped around. I do not recommend getting that cause thats more of a bride shirt now-a-days.

Normally there's no already made outfits. Usually all pha sin is made to fit. So you need to buy the fabric and get measured.

All you need is the pha sin... and a nice shirt. White/cream lace shirts usually work well cause they match everything and its instant dressy.

[sawatdeeyesitsme]

been to a a handful of Isaan country weddings and the only women I have seen in Thai silk have been the parents or older women/men. The younger friends (bridesmaids etc) have been in western dresses. The guests, well most of the guests were in jeans (me included). The Thai silk outfits were just a "suit" style (sorry don't know whatelse to call it) - fitted top/jacket and knee length skirt. Not been to an upmarket wedding, so I would have no idea!

[MiG16]

Skyhi

the one you had in mind would (in my opinion) be inappropriate

only the bride would wear such a style

my suggestion stands (along the style that i posted in previous post)

choose a thai silk, have it tailor made in a smart business suit style, but make sure the skirt is relatively long - aka almost like a sarong length (you could check with the tailor if they will cut it to shorter length for you after the wedding - that way you will have a dress you can use more than once!)

see this jacket: http://www.goodorient.com/images/P/WB1148_1_200.jpg

(would be more your age! you are too young to be dressing old style, thai wedding or not )

but adjust it slightly - certainly not those buttons (too chinese) make the v-line neck less deep, choose silk with no pattern in it,add a skirt rather than the jeans

and voila! a dress for the wedding that you can wear with jeans or for other occasions!

or see the red top in centre of this pic? http://cache.virtualtourist.com/1673227-Be...ops-Bangkok.jpg

instead of a top only, have them do that style as a dress for you.....length about slightly below the knees, kinda a flairy A shaped. choose a satin-y smooth-y more flow-y silk. will work well wiht this style

see this pic for instance: http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_5kJ1FkXWTh0/SPHI...00/P1020320.JPG

tthe purple, yellow, blue or green dress (all the same style), and you need not even choose the fabric with gold threads in the skirt

if you are shopping in bangkok...pahurat area is your best bet. feel free to PM me if you need help finding places (im not online a lot these days...but hopefully will be able to respond in time!)

[Yunnie]

The outfit she picked out is okay... on special holidays like loy kratong , but not as a wedding guest/family member. lol

She's the sister of the groom, so she SHOULD dress up preferably in Isan/Lao style. It would make a really good impression for your brother with his to-be-in-law

Thai silk is not a good choice being that its summer/hot season now. Thai silk "pha may" doesnt breath too well in this kind of weather. trust me, you dont want to deal with that when its suppose to be a fun day. I've worn all types of Thai and Lao outfits. In all types of fabric, from the special occasion/events to the casual simple village wear my whole life, and I still prefer a semi casual outfit that blends well with almost any event.

And since your brother's wedding a village wedding... I still stick by what I said earlier - Pha sin (tailored to you. Its a must or it will look crapy) + a nice lace or Chiffon shirt in white or cream. OR any other type of blouse that would match well with the pha sin.

The style itself is more casual then a full on silk outfit but you need to also look at the environment the wedding is held in. You dont want to completely stand out in a full on silk outfit in the middle of hot season in the middle of an Isan village, because youre already standing out as the groom's sister (and I'm assuming here but also as farang). Also most of the guest will be wearing plain old regular clothes. So you dont want to walk in looking Hi So in all Thai silk.

Pha sin cut in the folded over style Like this or somthing similar to that.

Note the "tin sin" foot of the pha sin is important. That is what separates it from the super casual, everyday sin for the most part. Its pretty much a separate part and when you touch it you'll know. Its heavy weaved/ embodied section that is sewn on to the body.

The "Tuaw" (Body) of the sin, has less happening then the then and when you look up close, the type you want will be be shiny, but not like not the shiny central Thai style wedding pha sin.

You may or may not need those gold or silver belts. I would get it, but the face of the belt.. the big circle thing isnt needed, at least not one as big as shown in the other outfits.

Shirt - Somthing like This or I prefer something like.. This. Dont worry about it being inappropriate. It isnt. As long as the shirt has a lining inside or you wear a cami under - white cami is best.

Sleeves, neck line style doesnt matter, whatever looks good on you, just remember nothing too low cut.

Lace or Chiffon shirt because its lighter and sheer. It will allow air to flow in better, plus its cuter.

The pha sin in the fold over style ( doesnt matter which way it folds over, whatever you prefer - left to right, or right to left.. its all the same) will give you room to sit without being tight, because none if the pha sin is cut off when to get it tailor. The 2 ends are sewn together to make a big skirt, then the head of the pha sin is tucked and nipped to fit your waist.

Also if you legs get hot you can, I dunno how to say it, but to get cool air in under the skirt, you wave(?) it a bit and it works well cause there's extra fabric.

OR...(and I cant believe I didnt think of this earlier, but also depends on how small or big you are...) You can just take a nice white/ cream shirt and go to Khon Kaen and ask the bride or her family if you can borrow a nice dressy pha sin to wear. I'm sure they have at least one but if they dont have one, someone in the village will. lol Less running around trying to get one made before you get there. And dont worry about the length, if it seems too short then. Isan women wear their pha sin shorter then Lao or Thai do...

But if youre big/wide... its better if you just get one made then.

EDIT: HERE! The girl in the purple. Thats what I'm trying to get across. Pha sin + lace shirt. lol

Edited March 31, 2010 by Yunnie