Falling Out With Thai Friends...

[Tornado]

and these are the days of our lives

[RDN]

...It's more like a non-ending Jerry Springer episode!

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

[The Gentleman Scamp]

I've noticed that even the most intelligent of Thais can also exaggerate and lie when they have been wronged in some way, though this wasn't the case with my friends wife, she just behaved like a grumpy child.

Some of the more intelligent Thai's, however, think they know somebody when they have only ever met at internet based social gatherings.

I would be willing to lose a friend by typing a list of her own shortcomings and another list of people who she thinks do not speak ill of her behind her back, but by doing so I would not only lose her as a friend but I would hurt her very much indeed, and I don't really want to do that.

Some of the nastiest fall outs, even with our own species, are sadly never repaired but the Thai's seem to do it on a whim.

[bkkmadness]

I've noticed that even the most intelligent of Thais can also exaggerate and lie when they have been wronged in some way, though this wasn't the case with my friends wife, she just behaved like a grumpy child.

Some of the more intelligent Thai's, however, think they know somebody when they have only ever met at internet based social gatherings.

I would be willing to lose a friend by typing a list of her own shortcomings and another list of people who she thinks do not speak ill of her behind her back, but by doing so I would not only lose her as a friend but I would hurt her very much indeed, and I don't really want to do that.

Some of the nastiest fall outs, even with our own species, are sadly never repaired but the Thai's seem to do it on a whim.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Scamp, I just don't get it, your 30 yrs old, but such a child sometimes?

[The Gentleman Scamp]

I chameleonic.

[bkkmadness]

chameleonic - you change colour or something?

Edited May 29, 2005 by bkkmadness

[The Gentleman Scamp]

chameleonic - you change colour or something?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Sort of...

When in Rome?

Incedentally, I'm not the only one who's childish online but who is different in reality if they choose to be.

Most posters will tell you I am the same in real life but that is because at TV meet ups and full of beer I usually am.

Anyway, this is going off topic but some of you just keep choosing to talk about me all the time instead of my topic so what can I do?

So, back on topic...

Do Thai's bear grudges more than westerners?

Well, for example... A female Thai TV member had a fall out with a French TV member who wanted to make amends but the Thai TV member blatantly refuses for the sake of losing face and shuns her whenever there are social gatherings.

Initially, the French girl was probably quite upset by this but I imagine by now she is past caring.

Example 2:

Myself and an Australian TV member have a fall out over a silly drunken incident in Phuket last November but within a couple of months we are good friends again.

Savvy?

[Darknight]

Well, for example... A female Thai TV member had a fall out with a French TV member who wanted to make amends but the Thai TV member blatantly refuses for the sake of losing face and shuns her whenever there are social gatherings

Now who would that have been

Ah the "face thing"

[bkkmadness]

somebody close this rubbish.

lets face it, turning into a pissin contest and the original topic was pretty crap as well.

Edited May 29, 2005 by bkkmadness

[The Gentleman Scamp]

somebody close this rubbish.

lets face it, turning into a pissin contest and the original topic was pretty crap as well.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

In YOUR opinion.

[bkkmadness]

somebody close this rubbish.

lets face it, turning into a pissin contest and the original topic was pretty crap as well.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

In YOUR opinion.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Obviously in my opinion, I wrote it.

Whats your point, it's not turned into a pissin contest? Its not a crap topic?

Or is the Scamps topic untouchable, how could it be crap with such an intelligent, creative yet hard done by writer behind it?

Lets face it, you've floated a smelly one.

[The Gentleman Scamp]

somebody close this rubbish.

lets face it, turning into a pissin contest and the original topic was pretty crap as well.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

In YOUR opinion.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Obviously in my opinion, I wrote it.

Whats your point, it's not turned into a pissin contest? Its not a crap topic?

Or is the Scamps topic untouchable, how could it be crap with such an intelligent, creative yet hard done by writer behind it?

Lets face it, you've floated a smelly one.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I'm not a hard done by writer.

Stop ASSUMING, stay on topic or get lost.

If it's such a rubbish topic (Which at 6 pages is blatantly obvious that no one is interested in reading or commenting so how right you are there) - then why don't you start a good one instead of making countless personal postings and only one which is relevant to the opening post?

Edited May 29, 2005 by The Gentleman Scamp

[bkkmadness]

well lets stay on topic then, do you think Thai people hold grudges more? and why do you think that?

when your a mod you can tell me to get lost, and as far as I recall you can't even keep a mod job.

Edited May 29, 2005 by bkkmadness

[britmaveric]

Scampy - bad legless behaviour doesnt excuse you. I'm sure if you make a gesture that will give you more creditbility and regain some respect.

[The Gentleman Scamp]

Scampy - bad legless behaviour doesnt excuse you. I'm sure if you make a gesture that will give you more creditbility and regain some respect.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Brit, that has already been established and I have not questioned it.

What does the title of this thread say?

Before posting again, please quote the above line and put the answer below it.

This is not all about my situation, it's a generalisation of a culture difference, that's why I put it in general topics instead of my blog.

This is hard work.

[bkkmadness]

Scampo I repeat my question do you think Thai people hold grudges more? and why do you think that?

lets get it on topic and see if any thing can be salvaged from this thread then, give us some input preferably without using your arguments with recent thai friends as an example.

[Sir Burr]

Do Thais hold grudges more than other people (westerners).

If it involves losing face, yes they do.

If it doesn't involve losing face, no they don't.

[bkkmadness]

I think it depends on the severity of the situation with people holding grudges, and this for Thais as well as Westerners as we westerners also have the concept of losing face, but just call it something different. Gaining face and losing face is as important in Western culture as in the Thai culture when it comes to arguments and grudges I believe.

I had a western mate that didn't talk to me for one year coz I borrowed his DVd for too long, and 'face' prevented him from contacting me over that time.

I say definately and individual and not cultural thing.

[The Gentleman Scamp]

I don't know what the word is for FLOF but there is one (that's Farang Loss Of Face by the way) and it is different and there are many examples...

Family feuds, boyfriends and girlfriends not wanting to be the first to call and apologise, it's more a fear of being the one who gives in on the western side where as in Thailand it's more of a decision not to associate with that person ever again BECAUSE they made them lose face or caused them embarrassment in the first place.

That okay?

Edited May 29, 2005 by The Gentleman Scamp

[bkkmadness]

The 'giving it' bit you mentioned on the western side could be interpreted as losing more face by the Asian side, its a very similar if not the same situation IMO.

A girl not talking to another girl because they had an argument, lol, happens all over the western world whatever race or culture.

[The Gentleman Scamp]

The A-Team lost Face once.

Edited May 29, 2005 by The Gentleman Scamp

[Thomas_Merton]

This story is true, I swear on the Bible. It happened just half an hour ago whilst walking down the street with my six year old son Martin. We had been talking about the Bank holidays.

Martin: Dad?

Me: Yeh.

Martin: Why is it some people can’t regret?

Me: Mmm…I dunno. What do you mean exactly?

Martin: Well, when I do something wrong I regret it. And when Mummy does something wrong, she regrets it. Even you, when you do something wrong, you regret it. Why can’t other people, when they do something wrong, regret it?

Me: Oh, I dunno…maybe it’s because some people are different. Not everybody’s the same. Why do you think it is, other people don’t regret?

Martin: I think it’s because they are stupid.

Edited May 29, 2005 by Thomas_Merton

[The Gentleman Scamp]

Martin, (Handsome lad by the way) will grow up to learn the unfortunate truth that the vast majority of human beings are stupid, Thai's, Bulgarians, Africans, whatever species they are.

[Thomas_Merton]

Martin, (Handsome lad by the way) will grow up to learn the unfortunate truth that the vast majority of human beings are stupid, Thai's, Bulgarians, Africans, whatever species they are.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Even an English Gentleman?

Martin already has girlfriend problems, not unlike the OP's.

Edited May 29, 2005 by Thomas_Merton

[The Gentleman Scamp]

Even an English Gentleman?

The English and the Americans make up most of the pie I'm sorry to say.

[elsie]

Well, for example... A female Thai TV member had a fall out with a French TV member who wanted to make amends but the Thai TV member blatantly refuses for the sake of losing face and shuns her whenever there are social gatherings.

Initially, the French girl was probably quite upset by this but I imagine by now she is past caring.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

What did I tell you about airing my personal issues without a permission? You were not there. You don't know jackshit about it. So, stay out of it. I can tell you it's not about losing face. I'm still happy with my decision. If you can't respect other people's will, well, oh yeah, I've known that anyway.

Now who would that have been   

Ah the "face thing" 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I and the big boss have got an agreement you'll leave me alone. Don't you know that? You just can't, can you?

[meadish_sweetball]

This has become an online virtual reality soap. Unbelievable.

Despite my decision to not watch television, there is no escaping the soaps, is there. It's full circle - life emulates TV instead of the opposite. Only now it's more than full circle, because people who have never met face to face bite into each other.

Let's see less of this in the future. And my apologies to anybody I have offended. As a start.

[The_Moog]

I and the big boss have got an agreement you'll leave me alone. Don't you know that? You just can't, can you?

Eh-oh,.........a new Thai grudge is spawned.

Was that Sego the Skunk?.....she's reputedly really nice and quite sweet on the eyes..

Edited May 29, 2005 by The_Moog

[elsie]

Check your email, Scampy.

[The_Moog]

well done The Gentleman Scamp - that's two Thais iced out in a week - and you don't even live in Thailand !