Thai Family Visits

[ninjat]

Hi,

We live in Bangkok. Lots of my Thai wife's relatives from both in- and outside Bangkok wants to come by and visit us. Sometimes the just stay for a few hours, but at other times they want to move in for a week or more

All of them are very nice, but honestly speaking, both of us would prefer to have some more peace, quiet and privacy at home.

But how do we get that? (especially since we don't want to make anyone angry).

Thanks,

Ninjat

[MikeyIdea]

You shouldn't deal with it, it should be the wife. And it certainly has to be dealt with in a nice way, yes. Relatives are important, any western husband who doesn't understand that is looking at relationship problems down the road. I am glad to hear that you do

Chat with the wife and agree beforehand on what to do. Go softly. Will some of it go away by itself over time? Can a tactical "schedule an outside activity so that you are not home" at certain times when visits are frequent help? Be nice to the wife, she doen't want to be in the middle of this

If it has to come to action, then it will be using the established hierarchy rules. The wife hints that the husband...

[ninjat]

My wife have thought about hinting that we might not be interested in have guests all the time, but she is very afraid of insulting someone or making someone angry/sad.

Have anyone tried hinting like this? How did you do it - and how did it go?

[MikeyIdea]

"but she is very afraid of insulting someone or making someone angry/sad" That's a valid concern. Is there a pattern to when they come? Can you schedule "dinner with friends" whatever on times that they normally come so that you are not home? There will be some that use your hospitality more than others, they should also be aware of that so carefully act on them first, suggest very welcome of course but slightly shorter time. Very subtle suggestions are normally enough. This hasn't happened to me, but I'd say: Open communication between you and the wife and then trust her, she probably does her best