Perhaps Things Would Be So Much Easier For Farang

[inthepink]

You're kinda missing the point. They come to your compound, they don't bring the girls back to their own home and they don't walk hand in hand with prostitutes down Sukhumvit in broad daylight.

Incidentally, none of the Thai males i know do any of the things you mentioned so it's a bit daft to generalise.

Edited July 15, 2010 by inthepink

[tigerfish]

Your kinda missing the point. They come to your compound, they don't bring the girls back to their own home and they don't walk hand in hand with prostitutes down Sukhumvit in broad daylight.

wanna bet !

try telling that to my sister-inlaw.

oh and btw its not the only time ive seen it happen, and believe me when the guys been caught by the wife unexpectidly with meat clever in hand it aint a pretty sight.

may be you move in different circles to me, but to think that all the thai men that you know have never done any of the things that i mentioned is well.....

i will just say count your lucky stars your not the wife!

Edited July 15, 2010 by tigerfish

[Richb2004v2]

Most TCN's try and try to marry up, socially.

A bit hard to understand, considering that one party in said marriage would be "marrying down".

Ha ha. True. You got me there. Well they certainly don't marry down to the extent that it must be perceived that many of the westerners do that come to Thailand.

I agree that although Thai men have mai noi and probably even use prostitutes, it is nothing like the action of wandering around shopping malls and sitting in restaurants with obvious hookers as the westerners are prone to. It would be equivalent of wandering around your local mall back home with a rough faced pro wearing a mangie fur coat, laddered fish nets, stilleto's and bleached blonde hair.

[Chunky1]

Most TCN's try and try to marry up, socially.

A bit hard to understand, considering that one party in said marriage would be "marrying down".

Ha ha. True. You got me there. Well they certainly don't marry down to the extent that it must be perceived that many of the westerners do that come to Thailand.

I agree that although Thai men have mai noi and probably even use prostitutes, it is nothing like the action of wandering around shopping malls and sitting in restaurants with obvious hookers as the westerners are prone to. It would be equivalent of wandering around your local mall back home with a rough faced pro wearing a mangie fur coat, laddered fish nets, stilleto's and bleached blonde hair.

Quick, someone refute Rich by pointing out that back in 1972 you saw an American man with a prostitute in a shopping mall in Idaho and then say something like "There are polite and impolite people everywhere" and then put your hands over your ears and shake your head back and forth violently until the scariness subsides.

[bonobo]

I have never seen a Thai man walking around a shopping mall with an obvious prostitute but I have seen thousands of farang doing so.

 Guess you haven't made it to Emporium yet, huh?  

[inthepink]

Your kinda missing the point. They come to your compound, they don't bring the girls back to their own home and they don't walk hand in hand with prostitutes down Sukhumvit in broad daylight.

wanna bet !

try telling that to my sister-inlaw.

oh and btw its not the only time ive seen it happen, and believe me when the guys been caught by the wife unexpectidly with meat clever in hand it aint a pretty sight.

may be you move in different circles to me, but to think that all the thai men that you know have never done any of the things that i mentioned is well.....

i will just say count your lucky stars your not the wife!

To be fair I don't have hundreds of Thai male friends, so it's a fairly small sample but no, none of them behave like that.

[Valentine]

The real stupidity of the OP's topic is the fact that chunky has failed to grasp that there are both inappropriately dressed people walking around, bot Thai and foreign. Secondly, there are perfectly polite, well mannered people be they Thai or foreign as well as ignorant and rude. Level headed people are always aware of this.

I have never seen a Thai man walking around a shopping mall with an obvious prostitute but I have seen thousands of farang doing so. I have never seen a Thai male in the various upscale apartment buildings that I have lived in, bring home an obvious prostitute but I have seen dozens of farang do so. I have never seen a Thai man take an obvious prostitute to a nice restaurant.

Now, I am not saying that that farang who do these are wrong, I am saying that this type of behavior is not socially acceptable in Thailand. Doing any of the above will instantly cause the Thais around you to lose all respect for you.

Now, of course many of you don't care what Thais think about your actions. That is exactly the point. Like I said, this is just something to think about the next time a Thai treats you with less than the amount of respect that you believe you deserve.

Consider that many Thais will automatically assume the Thai girl with a foreigner is/was a prostitute no matter how well she dresses. Don't forget the periodic crackdowns/outcry over students wearing mini skirts. I seriously doubt that just because a Thai male is considered hi so means he does not make use of prostitutes.

Edited July 15, 2010 by Valentine

[Chunky1]

Reading Comprehension ftw

[Loz]

....

Could you explain why you wouldn't touch a Thai woman?

Because they have nothing to bring to the table that I want.

I don't want to be even more of a spectacle in this country. Bad enough having black skin!

I don't want to adopt an extended family

I don't want to spend time with someone I can't have deep and meaningful discourse with

I don't much care for small breasts dressed up as something more appealing

I don't need a house maid/interpreter/tennis doubles partner

I don't want to invest myself in someone who is programmed never to put me first

I hope that helps.

I like Western girls. With free will and dynamic quality comes a risk I am willing to accept. The perceived static quality of Thai women is wasted on me.

[Loz]

If you look carefully its not hard to see older men with "students" who might to the uneducated appear to be a "niece". The reality it many cases is that her "uncle" is playing tummy sticks with her when they leave the mall and go to a curtained off room rented out for a few hours.

Or he might have paid for her room and take her there. Depends really. But to think that the Thais have not refined the art of playing away from home is to think that Britain is not famous for its fish and chips.

[GM1955]

I have never seen a Thai man walking around a shopping mall with an obvious prostitute but I have seen thousands of farang doing so. I have never seen a Thai male in the various upscale apartment buildings that I have lived in, bring home an obvious prostitute but I have seen dozens of farang do so. I have never seen a Thai man take an obvious prostitute to a nice restaurant.

You really don't have a clue............( Shakes head sadly ).

Tell me Chunky, have you ever been to Thailand ?

[matsellah]

I don't think the gist of the OP is lost on anyone: You're obvious, walking around with a girl dressed in hooker attire and you'll be treated without respect when doing so. We get it. This thread is degrading towards telling people they should stop doing that. That's not your job.

Edited July 16, 2010 by matsellah

[carmine]

Most TCN's try and try to marry up, socially.

A bit hard to understand, considering that one party in said marriage would be "marrying down".

Ha ha. True. You got me there. Well they certainly don't marry down to the extent that it must be perceived that many of the westerners do that come to Thailand.

I agree that although Thai men have mai noi and probably even use prostitutes, it is nothing like the action of wandering around shopping malls and sitting in restaurants with obvious hookers as the westerners are prone to. It would be equivalent of wandering around your local mall back home with a rough faced pro wearing a mangie fur coat, laddered fish nets, stilleto's and bleached blonde hair.

Quick, someone refute Rich by pointing out that back in 1972 you saw an American man with a prostitute in a shopping mall in Idaho and then say something like "There are polite and impolite people everywhere" and then put your hands over your ears and shake your head back and forth violently until the scariness subsides.

You are starting to sound rather sad Chunky. This does tend to form a pattern with you as i've seen on your other troll threads. All you have demonstrated in your threads is that you are a troll and a bigot

[chaoyang]

Chunky is alway on about older men, younger women, and what Thais think about that.

Methinks there is a bit of jealousy there. Obviously some sort of agenda. I suspect she is indeed chunky.

[IMA_FARANG]

I am a farang, who first came to Thailand in 1977. Although I have not lived in Thailand all that time, I have been coming to Thailand at least twice a year since that time.

I am very aware of the rules of conduct in Thailand...I know what is considered proper and what is not. Since 1977 many things have changed...for example, I rarely saw a Thai woman wearing shorts or even pants in Thailand in 1977. I know if a Thai woman wore shorts outside of the house in Thailand in 1977, she was assumed to be a "improper" woman. Today you see Thai women in supermarkets and malls wearing shorts...and no one thinks anything about it.

I have seen farang women in the BTS wearing clothing that by Thai standards was "inappropriate clothing". Such clothing however would not have been inappropriate in such cites as New York, Los Angeles, or London however. I believe most of these people are tourists...and they are not aware of what the Thai dress standards are.

It is unfortunate that many Thais judge all farangs by the actions of a few. I also have seen the drunken farangs verbally abusing Thais such as taxi drivers, shop clerks, waiters... etc. I know that kind of behavior usually comes back to all farangs...because that Thai who is abused by one farang will often develop a dislike of ALL FARANGs. Alchohol makes fools of us all, Thai of Farang, and when we are drinking we don't always say or behave the way we know we should.

All I can say is that I have a Thai family. I treat them well and with consideration for their dignity as human beings. They do the same with me...they all call me father and Wai me on greeting me. I treat them with what I hope is the real standard of behavior for both Thai and Farangs...consideration and courtesy, and respect for their dignity. If we all did that for each one of each other then there would be no problems, and misunderstandings would be quickly resolved.

Edited July 16, 2010 by IMA_FARANG

[IMA_FARANG]

Quote:

The doors slamming in your face thing is something I find really hard to fathom. How can a society with such exacting etiquette for something as superficial as the "Wai" find it acceptable to let doors slam in peoples faces. It is quite the juxtaposition!

------------------------------------------

Just to make it clear:

It isn't a Thai tradition to hold doors open. So for that reason they aren't doing anything "wrong" by letting the door close behind them. Holding open doors is a western thing...not a Thai thing.

Now in my Thai family, the children...because their mother lived with farangs when she was young (her mother worked as a maid/cook for a farang family) were taught by mom to hold open doors for their elders and anyone carrying something. They are regarded by their Thai friends as "wierd" for doing that.

You really can't fault a Thai for not doing something they hever heard of before...like holding doors open.

[Richb2004v2]

The reality it many cases is that her "uncle" is playing tummy sticks with her when they leave the mall

What a fantastic way with word you have. Your post makes sense by the way. Being a black guy you must have had some very interesting experiences here in Thailand. I expect the people in no way treat you different to anyone else, right. :jap:

[Samuian]

not appropriately dressed by Thai social standards What's that? Blue mini skirt with tight white blouse?

Yes, he means the college and university girls in their "tight, short inappropriate" outfits he has to brave while riding on BTS...

[sgunn65]

You would never see a thai man with an obvious prostitute? Thank goodness.

Only yesterday evening I was in a thai bar/restaurant and three old thai men (I presume they were widowed because they did not have their wives with them) came with their granddaughters. The kids were about 20-25 and dressed in the standard thai uniform of denim shorts and vests. It was very touching to see that these old men cared about their grandchildren so much they held their hands. Thank goodness these young women did not have to see obvious prostitutes contaminating their bar of choice. Hooray for Thai morality

[mysterybkk]

from my experiences from the night life, thai men engage just as much in questionable behavior as foreign men. it just takes on a different form. while it may be normal and acceptable for some foreign men to walk around in public with their "girlfriends", thai men cannot do this. outward appearance is everything here. so instead they take to all the karaoke clubs and lounges. they all have their favorite girls there, call ahead to book them, and then "sing songs" until the early morning hours. some of these places just offer hostesses, while others have no limits as to what goes on there. and lets not forget the numerous massage parlors all around town. and whenever they meet un public, these women are all dressed very conservatively.

as to how they cover it up, some tell their wives they have to take clients out for a night, while others' wives know about what goes on and dont care.

so it's not just foreigners misbehaving, the local men do it just as much. i'm not taking any sides here, just wanted to share some of my experiences.

[chaoyang]

When I lived in Thailand I must admit envy from time to time over  the high-quality young gals seen piling out of nice cars with blackened windows driven by middle-aged Thai men. Everyone knows that Thai men who can afford it have paid mistresses, mia nois and per-night professional relationships. Chunky -- go check out some of the VIP karaoke places, if they'll let you in

I think most Thais lose respect for the poor quality of choices many farangs make -- but then we don't have the same obsession with face or often the discerning nature to know that a girl might be an outcast in her own culture.

I suggest Chunky begin to reach out to these outcasts so they are not condemned to a life of prostitution. After all, it wasn't the farangs who made them uneducated or poor in the first place.

Edited July 16, 2010 by chaoyang

[Loz]

Just to make it crystal clear:

No matter where in the world you come from, if you can't see that letting a door slam in the face of someone behind you because you can't be arsed to hold it for an extra couple of seconds shows a distinct lack of courtesy, then you are living in a bubble that most civilized folk wouldn't care to spend much time in.

It is disingenuous to use the the term tradtion only in regard to Thais and then call it a "thing". Your prose is riddled with underlying bias. I ask you to consider this. If you were a very well regarded Thai (born in Massachusetts perhaps) do you suppose many "fellow" Thais would let a door slam in your face because it wasn't part of their "tradition". What utter claptrap! They would hold the door with their head bowed for the simple reason, respect. And if you respect one, shouldn't you respect all? Is that not courteous? I think to suggest courtesy is a "western thing" is a very weak and ill thought out idea.

just my two penneth of clarity.

Quote:

The doors slamming in your face thing is something I find really hard to fathom. How can a society with such exacting etiquette for something as superficial as the "Wai" find it acceptable to let doors slam in peoples faces. It is quite the juxtaposition!

------------------------------------------

Just to make it clear:

It isn't a Thai tradition to hold doors open. So for that reason they aren't doing anything "wrong" by letting the door close behind them. Holding open doors is a western thing...not a Thai thing.

Now in my Thai family, the children...because their mother lived with farangs when she was young (her mother worked as a maid/cook for a farang family) were taught by mom to hold open doors for their elders and anyone carrying something. They are regarded by their Thai friends as "wierd" for doing that.

You really can't fault a Thai for not doing something they hever heard of before...like holding doors open.

[Loz]

The reality it many cases is that her "uncle" is playing tummy sticks with her when they leave the mall

What a fantastic way with word you have. Your post makes sense by the way. Being a black guy you must have had some very interesting experiences here in Thailand. I expect the people in no way treat you different to anyone else, right. :jap:

Thank you Richb...,

Yes I have seen some things. Just last night the very dark family living in a corrugated lean-too hut found telling me their daughter was scared of the Nico ( nigga ) was hilarious. I was a paying customer as the dad was fixing my bike (at least he charged me for giving it back less than half fixed!) That these near itinerant folk think this is just plain harlmess fun shows a distinct lack of understand of the developments in "tollerance" that the developed world has come to enjoy over the last 60+ years in particular. But I don't won't to get into that right now...

[Chunky1]

Nowhere in this thread was I suggesting what farang should or shouldn't do, I was simply reasoning that perhaps the attitude of "I am going to do whatever I want and don't care what the Thais will think about" might be a catalyst to some users receiving less than what they perceive is their fair share of face. You never have to look beyond the first page of Threads on Thai Visa to spot one of those threads. Of course, many of you went off on personal tangents (as expected).

Have fun scavenging the street corners tonight.

Edited July 16, 2010 by Chunky1

[inthepink]

....

Could you explain why you wouldn't touch a Thai woman?

Because they have nothing to bring to the table that I want.

I don't want to be even more of a spectacle in this country. Bad enough having black skin!

I don't want to adopt an extended family

I don't want to spend time with someone I can't have deep and meaningful discourse with

I don't much care for small breasts dressed up as something more appealing

I don't need a house maid/interpreter/tennis doubles partner

I don't want to invest myself in someone who is programmed never to put me first

I hope that helps.

I like Western girls. With free will and dynamic quality comes a risk I am willing to accept. The perceived static quality of Thai women is wasted on me.

Well it seems to me you are tarring them all with the same brush which is exactly what you object to when people do it to you.

I haven't adopted an extended family, I can have a deep and meaningful conversation with my partner if I want to, she isn't my maid, she doesn't wear padded bras, I don't need an interpreter, being with her doesn't make a spectacle of me and we've only ever played tennis against each other.

If you simply don't find any Thai girls attractive then of course that's none of my business.

Edited July 16, 2010 by inthepink

[TAWP]

It is illegal to criticize public officials or those with a higher social caste than your own.

No, it is not.

[garyk]

I agree with the guy that said wait until you have been here for a few years. For the people that have been you know what he is talking about.

I thought the same way for the first year i was here. Now screw em..... Who cares.

That being said. I am polite and try to not show my anger. You get by alot easier. I am getting tired of getting reamed at custome for items i bring in. Over charged offffften. And alot of thais just thinking farang are easy marks.

There are many good and bad same as anywhere. But I personally don't give a shit anymore. Now i screw a woman 16 years my junior and have fun. But I have to pay for her same as most all here. She says she will never leave me. But I just don't care anymore. l can take her or any Thai woman now or leave em. I think it is a healthy attitude. You have to look after yourself and what is left over share with yourself....!!!

G

Edited July 16, 2010 by garyk

[inthepink]

....(deleted)

Edited July 16, 2010 by inthepink

[Luang]

If there is one thing that " just absolutely crushes our imagine in the eyes of the Thai populous" it is cretinous postings here that will be read by intelligent Thai members of TV.

Grammar / vocabulary ability too!

[Luang]

If there is one thing that " just absolutely crushes our imagine in the eyes of the Thai populous" it is cretinous postings here that will be read by intelligent Thai members of TV.

Would that they find them as amusing and entertaining as do the intelligent farang members of TV, of which there really are a few.

:lol:Two posts joking in a patronising fashion about non-Thais and i can't make sense of either post!