Yawn,.... yes , I know.... yet another "neighbour" problem thread.

Just would like to hear again the board's collective and sometimes colourful solutions to this common problem, if only for entertainment's sake.

My house is about 30 meters (five houses) away from this farang "neighbour" in question. I parked my car in a Soi to the side of his house (not the front) close to a small raised flower bed which he has actually built ON TOP OF THE EDGE OF THE ROAD.

This morning there was mud all over my car and the near side had been "keyed". I confronted the farang (Belgian I think) this morning who would not confess directly other than repeating over and over when questioned, "I have to look after my plants" "I have to look after my plants" "I have to look after my plants", at the same time laughing from ear-to-ear.

So, all you eager forum judges out there, what is the most intelligent way I should go about seeking justice.

Yes, I know some of you will say Jai Yen, and I should just let it go, but the guy is a real a$hole who needs to learn he cannot "key" people's brand new cars just because they park on a public highway alongside the side wall of his house.

Flattening him will end up costing you more money, but had he so obviously done that to my car, I would find it hard not to...

You got a dog?

If yes, I think I do not need to provide further details and instructions. If no, then there are other options, but I would try the Dog first :-)

You have to look after his plants, you have to look after his plants, you have to look after his plants .....

we have this really quite excellent liquid fertiliser in Australia called "Round-up", try HomePro

You have to look after his plants, you have to look after his plants, you have to look after his plants .....

we have this really quite excellent liquid fertiliser in Australia called "Round-up", try HomePro

I like that one .. but it would certainly start a dispute and retaliation might follow.

You have to look after his plants, you have to look after his plants, you have to look after his plants .....

we have this really quite excellent liquid fertiliser in Australia called "Round-up", try HomePro

I like that one .. but it would certainly start a dispute and retaliation might follow.

Yes, it's the retaliation thing that I am at a loss as to how to avoid.

The problem is any retaliation will escalate, so think carefully before you act or you could have a nuclear war. But sugar in a fuel tank works wonders.

and why not trying to find another parking spot?

You have to look after his plants, you have to look after his plants, you have to look after his plants .....

we have this really quite excellent liquid fertiliser in Australia called "Round-up", try HomePro

I like that one .. but it would certainly start a dispute and retaliation might follow.

Yes, it's the retaliation thing that I am at a loss as to how to avoid.

The thing is anything you do to him now will provoke retaliation if he already keyed your car then he is not afraid to act. I think the guy is a lot more stupid then you and will go further then you. I am not sure a civilized person could win this. If he even suspects its you there will be a problem because he knows that he suspects you.

Maybe the police could intimidate him in to paying the damages. Make a report in case it happens again

let the air out of his tires.

"Revenge is a dish best served cold" was a line I remember from somewhere.

call the police.

bleach in his flower bed will kill all the plants and it will be hard to grow something there afterwords............................not suggesting you should do this, but I would

let the air out of his tires.

He doesn't have a car.

Maybe the police could intimidate him in to paying the damages. Make a report in case it happens again

Yes, I was thinking along those lines.

Also engaging "a friendly BiB" (have one in the family), getting the car fixed and getting aforementioned BiB to deliver the repair bill and collect the cash from aforementioned A-hole.

Install a camera pointed at his house and see if he does it again

let the air out of his tires.

He doesn't have a car.

Maybe the police could intimidate him in to paying the damages. Make a report in case it happens again

Yes, I was thinking along those lines.

Also engaging "a friendly BiB" (have one in the family), getting the car fixed and getting aforementioned BiB to deliver the repair bill and collect the cash from aforementioned A-hole.

I think that would be the best way if you have a friendly BIB do it that way. Even give the guy bottle of wiskey or something like that. Its worth it.

You have to look after his plants, you have to look after his plants, you have to look after his plants .....

we have this really quite excellent liquid fertiliser in Australia called "Round-up", try HomePro

Remember that vengeance is a dish better served cold. He will link any "accidents" that may happen now to you. A few weeks/months from now, if you still feel so inclined, look after his plants

Maybe the police could intimidate him in to paying the damages. Make a report in case it happens again

Yes, report the facts to the police for now. Maybe they won't get him to pay damages to you, but perhaps they will find a way to annoy him (that will also cost him money).

Was also thinking of letting everyone in the Soi know what he's up to. Everyone in the street loves a bit of action like this to gossip about. Not a resolution I know, but a bit of fun still.

Also what is his ownership status, and your ownership status? Is this some kind of moobaan?

If you are an owner and he is a renter go directly to the house owner and complain directly to them about their tenant. The last thing a landlord wants is a tenant who is causing problems for other property owners in the area. He may find he's suddenly unable to renew his lease (or better yet out on his ass)

let the air out of his tires.

He doesn't have a car.

Maybe the police could intimidate him in to paying the damages. Make a report in case it happens again

Yes, I was thinking along those lines.

Also engaging "a friendly BiB" (have one in the family), getting the car fixed and getting aforementioned BiB to deliver the repair bill and collect the cash from aforementioned A-hole.

The solution is to not be a D-bag and park 5 houses down from your own next to a garden ......... you are assuming he keyed you're car. It could have just as easily been done by someone else. But if you really think it's a common problem I guess you knew it would happen but parked their anyhow. Boo Hoo ....... What sorts of ghettos do you people with problems like this live in? ! lol

let the air out of his tires.

He doesn't have a car.

Maybe the police could intimidate him in to paying the damages. Make a report in case it happens again

Yes, I was thinking along those lines.

Also engaging "a friendly BiB" (have one in the family), getting the car fixed and getting aforementioned BiB to deliver the repair bill and collect the cash from aforementioned A-hole.

The solution is to not be a D-bag and park 5 houses down from your own next to a garden ......... you are assuming he keyed you're car. It could have just as easily been done by someone else. But if you really think it's a common problem I guess you knew it would happen but parked their anyhow. Boo Hoo ....... What sorts of ghettos do you people with problems like this live in? ! lol

I often have to park 5 houses down from mine just because others parked on my spot. Im sure the guy would rather park in front of his own house.

The solution is to not be a D-bag and park 5 houses down from your own next to a garden ......... you are assuming he keyed you're car. It could have just as easily been done by someone else. But if you really think it's a common problem I guess you knew it would happen but parked their anyhow. Boo Hoo ....... What sorts of ghettos do you people with problems like this live in? ! lol

I see you can empathize with the Belgian fellow; it must piss you off when people park on your bridge?

Don't you people have a carport ? .... I have never been to anyone's house that doesn't have parking on it's own property ?

I think you've already got the answer. The friendly BiB in your family delivering the bill is an excellent idea, coupled with everyone in the soi knowing about it and all turning up when the copper brings the bill around. Plus everyone laughing at him every day afterwards, perhaps encouraging the 'I have to look after my plants i have to look after my plants' chant among the local Thai people.

Making a bit of a joke about it all, after getting him to pay for your car of course.

I understand how you feel, I'd be picturing him eating his plants and not laughing any more but I reckon sending your friendly copper with the bill is the best way long-term. Plus his new 'title' the man who 'have to look after my plants, have to look after my plants' with everybody laughing at him will give you some satisfaction, possibly for years to come!

The solution is to not be a D-bag and park 5 houses down from your own next to a garden ......... you are assuming he keyed you're car. It could have just as easily been done by someone else. But if you really think it's a common problem I guess you knew it would happen but parked their anyhow. Boo Hoo ....... What sorts of ghettos do you people with problems like this live in? ! lol

INTERESTING. Let me see, you're not the neighbour are you MrRich?

Of course wouldnt it have been much nicer for the neighbour (if he is in fact the culprit) to ask for the OP to move his vehicle instead of just damaging it.

OP, you are pushing shit uphill unless you can prove it was the neighbour (although I totally understand this is the most likely scenario), so the Police may only just be able to 'record' this as happening.

Difficult indeed, sounds like your neighbour is a right @hole.

The solution is to not be a D-bag and park 5 houses down from your own next to a garden ......... you are assuming he keyed you're car. It could have just as easily been done by someone else. But if you really think it's a common problem I guess you knew it would happen but parked their anyhow. Boo Hoo ....... What sorts of ghettos do you people with problems like this live in? ! lol

I see you can empathize with the Belgian fellow; it must piss you off when people park on your bridge?

No ...... I just think he is assuming he keyed the car. Plus I never really believe these silly stories anyhow. They have the same theme ...... Poor me I didn't do anything wrong and something bad happened out of the blue for no reason

obviously you are a rational person or else you would have already done something, having said this i agree with an other poster; find a new place to park, let it die, and when the waters have calmed kill his plants

But sugar in a fuel tank works wonders.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe Mythbusters hammered that one pretty bad...

The solution is to not be a D-bag and park 5 houses down from your own next to a garden ......... you are assuming he keyed you're car. It could have just as easily been done by someone else. But if you really think it's a common problem I guess you knew it would happen but parked their anyhow. Boo Hoo ....... What sorts of ghettos do you people with problems like this live in? ! lol

INTERESTING. Let me see, you're not the neighbour are you MrRich?

Of course wouldnt it have been much nicer for the neighbour (if he is in fact the culprit) to ask for the OP to move his vehicle instead of just damaging it.

OP, you are pushing shit uphill unless you can prove it was the neighbour (although I totally understand this is the most likely scenario), so the Police may only just be able to 'record' this as happening.

Difficult indeed, sounds like your neighbour is a right @hole.

In a one sided story the guy sounds that way but think about it ...... If all the parking was filled and he just parked in the next logical place, and has had no prior problems with this guy, does it make any sense at all that this guy would go out and key all the cars that park there, if it happened once it probably happens once in a while at least, why just this one car keyed or does he key them all ? There is obviously more to this half a story than meets the eye. Just another nonsense story about how unreasonable everyone else is but the poster\s in Thailand.