A seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and the talk turns to their adventures.

The seaman notes that the pirate has a peg leg, a hook, and an eye patch.

"How did you end up with the peg leg?" he asks.

The pirate replies, "I was swept overboard into a school of sharks. As my men were pulling me out, a shark bit my leg off."

"Wow!" says the seaman. "What about your hook?"

"Well," answers the pirate, "we were boarding a ship when one of the enemy hacked off my hand."

"Incredible!" says the seaman. "How'd you get the eye patch?"

"A sea gull sh1t in my eye," the pirate replies.

"You lost your eye to a sea gull dropping?" the seaman asks.

"Well," says the pirate, "the hook took a bit of getting used to."

a hooked ball is a favourite delivery among kegglers..

An oldy but a goldie

Loved it.

Same pirate went to the dry cleaner and was complaining about how expensive they are nowadays.

The dry cleaner replied :" May I suggest you get rid of the parrot".