What Is The Cause Of The Mid Life Crisis

[MAJIC]

The cause of the so called Mid life Crisis was self delusion,and coming to Thailand, truly believing its going to be a Paradise on earth existance,

When the Crisis is over ,you realise it was only a half truth,and being too mentally unstable to understand this at the time.

Edited October 27, 2010 by MAJIC

[MAJIC]

I am going to stock up on copy Ed Hardy tshirts as an insurance policy. Then at least my wardrobe will be covered and I'll look cool as hel_l if I end up in Bachelor Tower Pattaya.

Never heard of Ed Harvey tshirts,are they worth even copying?

Edited October 27, 2010 by MAJIC

[IanForbes]

What are mid life crisising Western men going to do when there aren't any more third world nations left? Suicide?

What world are you living in Chunky? There will always be the haves and the have nots. The very wealthy ensure this will happen. The wealthy MUST have the poor to exploit or they wouldn't get to the level they crave. Once the North American rich reached a point where the middle class started attaining things that were once theirs exclusively they bribed the politicians and started a downward spiral again. But, that is another topic entirely.

It's not only men who have the mid life crisis. It's just as bad, if not more, for women. That is why I made my first reply "gender neutral". That is why you see the married women flirting with men other than their husbands. It's been my experience that more women cause the infidelity problem then the men do. It's just that married men are too stupid to realize they are being toyed with to satisfy the woman's ego. Somebody already mentioned boredom being a main cause and I would agree. Everybody likes a little excitement in their life and that is hard to do when raising a family... unless you call having some kid poop his pants in a department store exciting.

[moe666]

I think the mid-life crisis s different for everyone as each is different. It was almost on cue the day I reached 40, it was shit I am getting old I will die soon. I had to work thru this shit. Eventually got a divorce, did some traveling and have made a few trips back to Thailand over the last 12 years (15 or so). No more mid-life crisis. No wife, kids are grown, retired, and do as I will. Couldn't be happier and guess what even hanging in a beer bar can be fun.

[IanForbes]

Really what young guy with anything on the ball would come to Thailand?

It sounds like you don't think much of Thailand besides the abundance of cheap prostitutes.

You obviously haven't read, or understood, many of Mark's topics. There is nothing wrong with prostitutes. They provide a great service for people who don't want a commited relationship. Sex is what makes the world go round. It is the greatest driving urge there is. And, you could even take it to a religious level. If God didn't want us to enjoy sex then he would have created us differently. Most wild animal species only have sex when the female comes into heat. It's only the primates and humans that do it for recreation.

[IanForbes]

but all of these mid life crisis type guys end up married and usually very quickly so how does that support the argument that sex with young women is the end all be all of life? seems like they want a relationship just like they had back home. they also seem to usually not wear the pants in the relationship.

That is because people keep repeating their mistakes over and over until they eventually learn the error of their ways, or grow so poor they can no longer repeat them. Then they sit in front of a computer and whine about it.

It's been a fun topic, and one of your better ones, Chunky. I'll have to invite you onto my boat some time. It's called a "Troller".

[JPPR2]

A mid life crisis is for those that believe there is such a thing as a mid life crisis. The term is yet another way to generalize, label then chastise. Typical western behavior. I bet if people moving from SE Asia over to US or UK are not labeled as anything other than "Lucky". How does that work for you.

There is no such thing. People do what they want to do for whatever reason they have decided. Just because they do something different does not make it a crisis....

Who will be the lucky winner of the next idiotic post on TV....HAHAHAHAHA.................................................

[cobra]

It may well be the inevitable realization that either way, we're all going to lose in the end, (life), so that affects the threshold of risk inherit in any decision making process the closer we get to end-point.

We've all seen quarterback's under pressure from the clock make questionable yet spectacular plays.

Near the end, we all just want to get at least one win on the books.

[Ulysses G.]

Who will be the lucky winner of the next idiotic post on TV....HAHAHAHAHA.................................................

The OP is certainly a contender.

[moe666]

A mid life crisis is for those that believe there is such a thing as a mid life crisis. The term is yet another way to generalize, label then chastise. Typical western behavior. I bet if people moving from SE Asia over to US or UK are not labeled as anything other than "Lucky". How does that work for you.

There is no such thing. People do what they want to do for whatever reason they have decided. Just because they do something different does not make it a crisis....

Who will be the lucky winner of the next idiotic post on TV....HAHAHAHAHA.................................................

I have to agree with this just a label on someone actions at a point in life. I think Chunky is having a early life crisis.

[tartempion]

Really what young guy with anything on the ball would come to Thailand?

It sounds like you don't think much of Thailand besides the abundance of cheap prostitutes.

I was emailing in a internet shop in Nong Han, 35kms East of Udon Thani.

5 ladies in school uniform where chatting away, they definitely looked high-school, age 18-20.

Pc next to me was running webcam and saw face of farang in the cam window, all 5 were clearly dating.

In the mean time the lady running the shop came over to ask me if I was in need of a wife, 5 available right there.

So it's not just the prostitutes.....

[sarahsbloke]

but all of these mid life crisis type guys end up married and usually very quickly so how does that support the argument that sex with young women is the end all be all of life? seems like they want a relationship just like they had back home. they also seem to usually not wear the pants in the relationship.

It's true

I want a relationship, I want sex, I want a woman young enough for me to fancy .... and produce children.

My new wife is 20 years younger than me and is happy to try and fill all my requirements.

The old bag back home was too old (and too nasty) to even try.

Edited October 28, 2010 by sarahsbloke

[bermondburi]

but all of these mid life crisis type guys end up married and usually very quickly so how does that support the argument that sex with young women is the end all be all of life? seems like they want a relationship just like they had back home. they also seem to usually not wear the pants in the relationship.

It's true

I want a relationship, I want sex, I want a woman young enough for me to fancy .... and produce children.

My new wife is 20 years younger than me and is happy to try and fill all my requirements.

The old bag back home was too old (and too nasty) to even try.

Hang on a minute. This is coming from the person who got married after six weeks or something like that and as yet can't communicate properly with said new wife. If ever there is an example of a mid-life crisis then that is it. Biggest mistake foreigners make here is getting married too quickly.

[WAYNEandAEI]

In some cases it is not so much a crisis, more a mid life adventure, discovery or an overdue indulgence.

[mark45y]

Really what young guy with anything on the ball would come to Thailand?

It sounds like you don't think much of Thailand besides the abundance of cheap prostitutes.

I love Thailand. But get real. As a young man where are the opportunities? Where is the money? Where are the educational opportunities? If a young man gets an MBA from Harvard he is not chafing at the bit to get to Korat. I have four daughters who are all well traveled all over the world including Asia. Not one of them has ever told me, “Dad, I want to go to Thailand, all the cute smart guys live in Thailand.”

Thailand is an old guys paradise. Not for hookers but for normal women who don't have much to choose from the available age appropriate population.

Edited October 28, 2010 by mark45y

[ableguy]

I thought the mid-life crisis was buying a Harley or a 'vette and getting a tattoo or a body piercing? Taking a belated interest in mountain biking or skateboarding... or surfing (not in Thailand of course). Wearing the latest Camel Active shirt with appliques and decals that allude to exploring or Africa. Surfing the 'net on a MacBook while sipping a double caramel machiato at Starbucks. Going regularly to Lucifer's or Excite or maybe 'discovering' katoeys.

Never thought of the typical beer bar owner and/or customer as being particularly in any identity crisis. Same goes for a foreigner that choses to rent a Thai-style 4x4 (meters that is) with a squatty shitter and a ceiling fan. That's just being frugal or cheap... or maybe broke. In my case, I was young, didn't know any better and choices were limited when chosing to move in with the gogo dancing gf in the '70s.

When I worked in Houston, the deck at Sam's Boat on Richmond on a Sunday afternoon was always heaving with mid-life crisis blokes. But we still managed to pull the birds (and they weren't all strippers from Rick's either).

What are you trying to say?

[Loz]

The word crisis in Chinese means "Oportunity riding a dangerous wind"

My wind is pretty dangerous, I'll conceed that. I've burned out expensive alcantara car seats with it before now (Everyone should fart if they drive a lotus Elise properly and you're lucky of you don't shart!) But the point I am making is, coming here for me at 33 was not about crisis in the negative sense, rather about changing values and doing something (teaching) which gives real gratification. The kind money can't buy. (which is handy cos the pay is pityful).

I didn't know I would fall in love with the job and want to do it for a quite a while. That was serendipitous. But that brings me full circle to the Chinese translation, doesn't it?

[bermondburi]

Really what young guy with anything on the ball would come to Thailand?

It sounds like you don't think much of Thailand besides the abundance of cheap prostitutes.

I love Thailand. But get real. As a young man where are the opportunities? Where is the money? Where are the educational opportunities? If a young man gets an MBA from Harvard he is not chafing at the bit to get to Korat. I have four daughters who are all well traveled all over the world including Asia. Not one of them has ever told me, “Dad, I want to go to Thailand, all the cute smart guys live in Thailand.”

Thailand is an old guys paradise. Not for hookers but for normal women who don't have much to choose from the available age appropriate population.

You sound quite out of touch with young people today. There aren't that many oppurtunities in the west these days due to an older generations financial <deleted> ups that us youngsters will be forced to pay for for the next X many years. UK university fees are now something like eight grand a year so a lot of people don't get that many chances in the first place.

Having said that. Many years ago I came to Thailand as a young man and there are plenty of oppurtunities to be had here and money to be made as well. As long as you think with the top half of your body and not the bottom like so many of you older guys seem to do .

[Loz]

Really what young guy with anything on the ball would come to Thailand?

It sounds like you don't think much of Thailand besides the abundance of cheap prostitutes.

I love Thailand. But get real. As a young man where are the opportunities? Where is the money? Where are the educational opportunities? If a young man gets an MBA from Harvard he is not chafing at the bit to get to Korat. I have four daughters who are all well traveled all over the world including Asia. Not one of them has ever told me, “Dad, I want to go to Thailand, all the cute smart guys live in Thailand.”

Thailand is an old guys paradise. Not for hookers but for normal women who don't have much to choose from the available age appropriate population.

I hear you, Marky. And I agree. its not the BEST place for a young guy who has no means to speak of. But if a young guy has no money worries to speak of then what's to stop him from finding something he likes here in Thailand? Obviously for me its not the marriage prospects, but that said, the more this place unfolds, the more reasons I can see to be here. That's not to say I can't also see reasons to go, but lately I am thinking a holiday from the place might be better than packing up and shipping out for the foreseeable.

I love a good crisis, in the Chinese sense of the word

[mark45y]

Really what young guy with anything on the ball would come to Thailand?

It sounds like you don't think much of Thailand besides the abundance of cheap prostitutes.

I love Thailand. But get real. As a young man where are the opportunities? Where is the money? Where are the educational opportunities? If a young man gets an MBA from Harvard he is not chafing at the bit to get to Korat. I have four daughters who are all well traveled all over the world including Asia. Not one of them has ever told me, “Dad, I want to go to Thailand, all the cute smart guys live in Thailand.”

Thailand is an old guys paradise. Not for hookers but for normal women who don't have much to choose from the available age appropriate population.

You sound quite out of touch with young people today. There aren't that many oppurtunities in the west these days due to an older generations financial <deleted> ups that us youngsters will be forced to pay for for the next X many years. UK university fees are now something like eight grand a year so a lot of people don't get that many chances in the first place.

Having said that. Many years ago I came to Thailand as a young man and there are plenty of oppurtunities to be had here and money to be made as well. As long as you think with the top half of your body and not the bottom like so many of you older guys seem to do .

I have four daughters. Two in the US and two in Canada. I couldn't be out of touch even if I wanted to be out of touch.

Smart good looking people get jobs regardless of the economy. Still having said that you really can't compare a third world country with a myraid of domestic problems to the US. California has a higher GDP than Australia for gosh sake let alone Thailand. And California is only one state. Get things in proportion. US 14.2 trillion dollars GDP, UK 2.6 trillion GDP, California 1.8 Trillion. Thailand you can look it up.

And Debt.

20. United States - 98.4%

External debt (as % of GDP): 98.4%

Gross external debt: $13.92 trillion

2009 GDP (est): $14.14 trillion

External debt per capita: $45,302

18. Australia - 121.9%

External debt (as % of GDP): 121.9%

Gross external debt: $1.037 trillion

2009 GDP (est): $851.1 billion

External debt per capita: $48,787

15. Germany - 176.8%

External debt (as % of GDP): 176.8%

Gross external debt: $4.97 trillion

2009 GDP (est): $2.81 trillion

External debt per capita: $60,357

9. France - 244.3%

External debt (as % of GDP): 244.3%

Gross external debt: $5.23 trillion

2009 GDP (est): $2.09 trillion

External debt per capita: $79,982

2. United Kingdom - 428.8%

External debt (as % of GDP): 428.8%

Gross external debt: $9.12 trillion

2009 GDP (est): $2.128 trillion

External debt per capita: $149,281

Edited October 28, 2010 by mark45y

[sarahsbloke]

It's true

I want a relationship, I want sex, I want a woman young enough for me to fancy .... and produce children.

My new wife is 20 years younger than me and is happy to try and fill all my requirements.

The old bag back home was too old (and too nasty) to even try.

Hang on a minute. This is coming from the person who got married after six weeks or something like that and as yet can't communicate properly with said new wife. If ever there is an example of a mid-life crisis then that is it. Biggest mistake foreigners make here is getting married too quickly.

Communication is not on my list of requirements in a wife ...... only the young and foolish (from the western world) think that is what a woman is for. Although (after 9 months) my wife now speaks very good English, much better than many graduates I have met.

PS We were married 3 weeks after meeting, 1 week for initial introduction and 'try before buy', 1 week of financial negotiation to agree purchase price and conditions, 1 week to wait for auspicious day for wedding.

[IanForbes]

In some cases it is not so much a crisis, more a mid life adventure, discovery or an overdue indulgence.

I think some of us are getting a bit off the subject, but WAYNEandEi kind of nailed it in a short sentence.

Yes, it CAN become a crisis it you are willing to toss away a good paying job, a 15 year marriage with chilren, and a mortgage free home, for a transient life where you don't know where you are going or how you are going to pay for it.

[Tonto21]

What business is it to anyone if the guy in the bar next to you is trying to recapture his youth, so long as he's not imposing on you. Life is to short for regrets, so you miss out on doing some stupid shit when your young, and decide when your 50+ to give it a go.

I think I could easily be mistaken for having a mid-life crisis.....fact is my life has been one long search for adventure and for doing thing that enrich my sole, and I'm going to keep doing it. I don't intend to take any regrets with me into the next life.

So to all in a mid-life crisis, go for it, just don't be a dumb ass.......And lose that pony tail...Not cool!

[Chunky1]

most of the farang who come here on a mid life crisis end up making a huge mess of their life. all one has to do to get an idea of it is spend 15 minutes at the American Citizens Services counter or ride the skytrain or go to a shopping mall and you will see what kind of wonderful Thai gal the average mid life crisis suffering farang has purchased. it ain't a pretty situation.

[IanForbes]

most of the farang who come here on a mid life crisis end up making a huge mess of their life. all one has to do to get an idea of it is spend 15 minutes at the American Citizens Services counter or ride the skytrain or go to a shopping mall and you will see what kind of wonderful Thai gal the average mid life crisis suffering farang has purchased. it ain't a pretty situation.

Well, there is the option of the typical UK or North American beauty...

as compared to the typical Thailand gal...

Your choice.

[Loz]

Marky, your USA figs for external Debt. Do they include the FED? Cos lets face it, its privately owned and the controlling interests are MAINLY European. I'm sure you didn't mean to mislead people. But, is there any reason why you didn't publish the per capita data for the US also?

[Loz]

As much love as I have for you Ian, I don't think much about that girl driving the car is typical.

This is more my cup of tea. And quite "normal" I assure you.

[Loz]

The difference is, if I lost a girl like that, I would be cut up. If you lose a local, you just go to the next bar and get a refill on your prescription. Call me old fashioned, but I like the English rose, still.

[bermondburi]

I love Thailand. But get real. As a young man where are the opportunities? Where is the money? Where are the educational opportunities? If a young man gets an MBA from Harvard he is not chafing at the bit to get to Korat. I have four daughters who are all well traveled all over the world including Asia. Not one of them has ever told me, "Dad, I want to go to Thailand, all the cute smart guys live in Thailand."

Thailand is an old guys paradise. Not for hookers but for normal women who don't have much to choose from the available age appropriate population.

You sound quite out of touch with young people today. There aren't that many oppurtunities in the west these days due to an older generations financial <deleted> ups that us youngsters will be forced to pay for for the next X many years. UK university fees are now something like eight grand a year so a lot of people don't get that many chances in the first place.

Having said that. Many years ago I came to Thailand as a young man and there are plenty of oppurtunities to be had here and money to be made as well. As long as you think with the top half of your body and not the bottom like so many of you older guys seem to do .

I have four daughters. Two in the US and two in Canada. I couldn't be out of touch even if I wanted to be out of touch.

Smart good looking people get jobs regardless of the economy. Still having said that you really can't compare a third world country with a myraid of domestic problems to the US. California has a higher GDP than Australia for gosh sake let alone Thailand. And California is only one state. Get things in proportion. US 14.2 trillion dollars GDP, UK 2.6 trillion GDP, California 1.8 Trillion. Thailand you can look it up.

And Debt.

20. United States - 98.4%

External debt (as % of GDP): 98.4%

Gross external debt: $13.92 trillion

2009 GDP (est): $14.14 trillion

External debt per capita: $45,302

18. Australia - 121.9%

External debt (as % of GDP): 121.9%

Gross external debt: $1.037 trillion

2009 GDP (est): $851.1 billion

External debt per capita: $48,787

15. Germany - 176.8%

External debt (as % of GDP): 176.8%

Gross external debt: $4.97 trillion

2009 GDP (est): $2.81 trillion

External debt per capita: $60,357

9. France - 244.3%

External debt (as % of GDP): 244.3%

Gross external debt: $5.23 trillion

2009 GDP (est): $2.09 trillion

External debt per capita: $79,982

2. United Kingdom - 428.8%

External debt (as % of GDP): 428.8%

Gross external debt: $9.12 trillion

2009 GDP (est): $2.128 trillion

External debt per capita: $149,281

From my own experience I can say that you are absolutely right. Smart good looking people do get jobs regardless of the economy. I've always been lucky in that respect.

[bermondburi]

It's true

I want a relationship, I want sex, I want a woman young enough for me to fancy .... and produce children.

My new wife is 20 years younger than me and is happy to try and fill all my requirements.

The old bag back home was too old (and too nasty) to even try.

Hang on a minute. This is coming from the person who got married after six weeks or something like that and as yet can't communicate properly with said new wife. If ever there is an example of a mid-life crisis then that is it. Biggest mistake foreigners make here is getting married too quickly.

Communication is not on my list of requirements in a wife ...... only the young and foolish (from the western world) think that is what a woman is for. Although (after 9 months) my wife now speaks very good English, much better than many graduates I have met.

PS We were married 3 weeks after meeting, 1 week for initial introduction and 'try before buy', 1 week of financial negotiation to agree purchase price and conditions, 1 week to wait for auspicious day for wedding.

"1 week of financial negotiation to agree purchase price and conditions"

Where did you get her ? Down at Tesco ? And how come it took a week to sort that out. Do you get a money back provision if you're not satisfied , from the shop where you bought her. Who said romance was dead ?

As for communication. Fluency in at least one or preferably both languages by both parties from what I have seen from relationships here makes for a much stronger relationship. Looks don't last for ever so it does help if you've got something to talk about.

Still at the end of the day, up to you as they say.