Why I Love Dogs More Than Humans!

[DEVATSAR]

You are waking with your wife and dog in a street somwhere.

You approarch your car, you open the boot/trunk, you then pick up your wife or girlfriend and place her into the boot of the car, you then pick your dog up and place him/her into the boot. You lock the boot and walk away,you came back 3 hours later and open the boot......... guess whos gonna kiss you first ??

It aint gonna be the wife for sure !!

cheers lol

paul

[meatboy]

what a great idea the only problem i would have is,the dog loves the wife more than me,so 2against 1 no thanks.

[Gladiator]

Why Some Men Have Dogs And Not Wives:

1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.

2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.

3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.

4. A dog's parents never visit.

5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.

6. You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go 24 hours a day.

7. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.

8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.

9. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, "If I died, would you get another dog?"

10. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away.

11. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert.

12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it's interesting.

13. Dogs like to ride in the back of a pickup truck.

And last, but not least:

14. If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff.

[DEVATSAR]

Why Some Men Have Dogs And Not Wives:

1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.

2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.

3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.

4. A dog's parents never visit.

5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.

6. You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go 24 hours a day.

7. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.

8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.

9. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, "If I died, would you get another dog?"

10. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away.

11. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert.

12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it's interesting.

13. Dogs like to ride in the back of a pickup truck.

And last, but not least:

14. If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff.

Nice One lol lol

[sbk]

Why Some Women Have Dogs And Not Husbands

1. A dog is always willing to listen to you—without trying to solve all your problems.

2. Dogs will eat anything you give them—happily and without complaining.

3. Dogs don’t have mothers-in-law who find fault with everything you do (or don’t do) for their “precious boy.”

4. A dog will never ask if he can buy a boat.

5. Dogs do not spend 5 hours playing golf or video games.

6. Dogs are happy to watch romantic comedies, rather than football.

7. Dogs are loyal. Even if they hump your best friend’s leg, they will do it in front of you and not try to go home with her.

8. Dogs will never complain about how much you spend on personal grooming.

9. A dog will never contradict you in front of your child or give you small appliances for your birthday or Christmas.

10. A dog will never use all the hot water and leave soppy towels on the bathroom floor.

11. Dogs think you are just as attractive now as you were 20 lbs. ago.

12. A dog will kiss you when you are crying your eyes out—not accuse you of being “manipulative.”

13. A dog does not believe he can fix anything just because he has a Y chromosome. His manhood will not be threatened when you call a plumber.

And last, but not least:

I4. You can neuter a dog anytime you want.

[Naam]

Dogs think you are just as attractive now as you were 20 lbs. ago.

some husbands think their wives are much more attractive after they put on 20 (or more) pounds! :jap:

[DEVATSAR]

Why Some Women Have Dogs And Not Husbands

1. A dog is always willing to listen to you—without trying to solve all your problems.

2. Dogs will eat anything you give them—happily and without complaining.

3. Dogs don't have mothers-in-law who find fault with everything you do (or don't do) for their "precious boy."

4. A dog will never ask if he can buy a boat.

5. Dogs do not spend 5 hours playing golf or video games.

6. Dogs are happy to watch romantic comedies, rather than football.

7. Dogs are loyal. Even if they hump your best friend's leg, they will do it in front of you and not try to go home with her.

8. Dogs will never complain about how much you spend on personal grooming.

9. A dog will never contradict you in front of your child or give you small appliances for your birthday or Christmas.

10. A dog will never use all the hot water and leave soppy towels on the bathroom floor.

11. Dogs think you are just as attractive now as you were 20 lbs. ago.

12. A dog will kiss you when you are crying your eyes out—not accuse you of being "manipulative."

13. A dog does not believe he can fix anything just because he has a Y chromosome. His manhood will not be threatened when you call a plumber.

And last, but not least:

I4. You can neuter a dog anytime you want.

meeeeeooooowwwwww sbk

lol

[DEVATSAR]

Dogs think you are just as attractive now as you were 20 lbs. ago.

some husbands think their wives are much more attractive after they put on 20 (or more) pounds! :jap:

Classic example

Dearest "Does my bum look big in this"

Reply you darent say " it looks big in everything!!)

lol

[WarpSpeed]

Why Some Women Have Dogs And Not Husbands

1. A dog is always willing to listen to you—without trying to solve all your problems.

2. Dogs will eat anything you give them—happily and without complaining.

3. Dogs don’t have mothers-in-law who find fault with everything you do (or don’t do) for their “precious boy.”

4. A dog will never ask if he can buy a boat.

5. Dogs do not spend 5 hours playing golf or video games.

6. Dogs are happy to watch romantic comedies, rather than football.

7. Dogs are loyal. Even if they hump your best friend’s leg, they will do it in front of you and not try to go home with her.

8. Dogs will never complain about how much you spend on personal grooming.

9. A dog will never contradict you in front of your child or give you small appliances for your birthday or Christmas.

10. A dog will never use all the hot water and leave soppy towels on the bathroom floor.

11. Dogs think you are just as attractive now as you were 20 lbs. ago.

12. A dog will kiss you when you are crying your eyes out—not accuse you of being “manipulative.”

13. A dog does not believe he can fix anything just because he has a Y chromosome. His manhood will not be threatened when you call a plumber.

And last, but not least:

I4. You can neuter a dog anytime you want.

Issues much .....

[sbk]

Yes it seems like you do --since you didn't read the first joke and decided that the second joke wasn't a joke -- you really need to relax a bit more and stop taking life so seriously

[WarpSpeed]

Yes it seems like you do --since you didn't read the first joke and decided that the second joke wasn't a joke -- you really need to relax a bit more and stop taking life so seriously

Yes clearly it's me, after all I am male and have broader shoulders ...

[sbk]

Yes it seems like you do --since you didn't read the first joke and decided that the second joke wasn't a joke -- you really need to relax a bit more and stop taking life so seriously

Yes clearly it's me, after all I am male and have broader shoulders ...

Well, you seem to be the one that can't take a joke....

[WarpSpeed]

Yes it seems like you do --since you didn't read the first joke and decided that the second joke wasn't a joke -- you really need to relax a bit more and stop taking life so seriously

Yes clearly it's me, after all I am male and have broader shoulders ...

Well, you seem to be the one that can't take a joke....

Ok since you know me and my interpretations so well and there's no way to explain that kind of humor to you I'll just let it drop, can you??

Edited August 29, 2011 by WarpSpeed

[sbk]

Chip much? wow. well, never mind, thanks for reminding me why my dogs are so wonderful

[Boo]

funny how the jokes about women went without commented but the ones about men have brought out the sensitivity. your shoulders may be broad but the skin is too thin.

[Gladiator]

Blimey!

What have I started?

SBK Touche !!!!!!

I tend to love both Women and dogs. they are both different but both charming and enchanting in their own ways.

My posting not meant to cause any disrespect rather a smile.

if otherwise - "Mea Culpa"

Life is very short, precious and fragile .

My good wishes to all of you .

As Spock wouid have said

We share and rent a planet!

"Live long and Prosper"

[meatboy]

GLADIATOR you missed one dogs dont answer back.