With respect to Thai women who have children from a previous marriage or relationship, and where they may or may not have any ongoing association with this person, I've read in a couple of places where it is common for the woman to say that the father is "dead" regardless of whether or not that may be the case.

Is this an urban myth? Or is it a common practice?

In my particular case, a Thai woman that I am getting serious with, has a 5-year-old from a another man. She tells me that the father was killed in a traffic accident 2 months after the child was born. Being the caring and sympathetic person that I am, my initial thought is to want to believe what she is telling me and be compassionate about what she says she has gone through.

On the other hand, I want to be sure this is the case and not have any surprises further down the road, if we get married as planned and if I decide that I want to adopt her child.

Thanks in advance for any thoughts offered.

If you are getting serious, you can certainly broach the adoption possibility, and start getting the papers ready...including the death certificate. Often the husband has done a bunk and cannot be found. His untimely death is a simpler explanation. Good luck

the father is "dead"

Frequently, and particularly at the beginning of the relationship, a Thai g/f will tell you what she thinks you want to hear and what she believes will keep the relationship going, not necessarily the truth - at least, that has been my experience.

You may discover the truth varies somewhat as the relatiolnship develops and she feels more secure with you.

One thing you can be sure of if you marry a Thai girl - there will be "surprises down the road", but isn't that one of the reasons you are attracted to her?

I'd take an each way bet on this one. You only have to look at the road death statistics to realise that far too many people do die in traffic accidents.

I'm sure also that some of these stories are also a convenient explanation for the ex's disappearance.

You have to use your own judgment. If she is a lying, cheating, scamming con girl in her other dealings then she probably is in this matter too. If she is honest in other respects then there is a good chance that she is honest in this as well.

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