I Am Screwed And I Know It.

[punch]

Long story short,

Got married to a pregnant thai girl ( it is my daughter) brought her to oz to have our child and almost 2 years on with a rocky relationship I have considered seperating. I have found on her Facebook many acquaintances that she plans to meet up with both thai and farang some she has already. I went to my lawyer and she said the law will favor her, she will get most of my house and I will pay a lot of child support and so on. As much as that eats me I can change the law, but I am pissed that the law will favor a thai girl who probably had a plan for a long time, probably is or will have and affair and is a very neglect full mother. All of these I can only document over time but there is nothing I can do now.

So asside from all that the only thing I would like to know and hear from are other Australian who found them selves in a similar situation or can relate to my story. The one thing that I am getting mixed information about is if she gets full custody of our child, can she leave the country with out my concent? The child has only Australian citizen ship and has no pass port.

She was smug engough last night to look me in the eye and tell me she will take my house get a new rich husban to support her and our daughter. My patience is running thin, and I will be getting more legal advice from another lawyer.

Thanks.

[toan6082]

what is her visa statis. both parents sign for passport so do not sign. try and stop your wife from gaining full residency. were you married in thai or aus. try and gather past information about her past in thailand to discredit her personality when it comes to full custody. will help futher.

[hedonist44]

Your right, you're screwed Pal. No point in bitching about it now. Just put your head down, make sure you keep your job, don't plan on buying anything for yourself for the next 16 years and keep looking on the bright side, you could have had triplets:)

[punch]

what is her visa statis. both parents sign for passport so do not sign. try and stop your wife from gaining full residency. were you married in thai or aus. try and gather past information about her past in thailand to discredit her personality when it comes to full custody. will help futher.

Hello toan, Her visa statis is still Temperary and we where married in Australia, It was the only way to ensure ( i thought at the time) on keeping my child if it did go bad. I just spoke to imagration this morning and they said pretty much the same thing as you. I think my lawyer is being a little sensitive to all parties. I know a baby needs its mother but!!

Have you got any more advice or questions?

[punch]

Your right, you're screwed Pal. No point in bitching about it now. Just put your head down, make sure you keep your job, don't plan on buying anything for yourself for the next 16 years and keep looking on the bright side, you could have had triplets:)

Yep, I made my bed. Its all about damage control now. Actually triplets would have been great. The wife has a complete meldown when our little one has a bad day, by the end of it she is ready to leave. So 3 would have sent her running. Thats also my bitch.... its all about the money not the baby..

[Mario2008]

The child is also Thai because it has a Thai mother, both Australia and Thailand don't have an issue with dual nationality. Normally both parents must sign a Thai passport application.

What you need to do is contact a lawyer specialized in family law and plot your course of action with him. In the mean time you would need to gather evidence of the mother neglecting the child and you taking good care of the child.

[MikeyIdea]

Australian law I'm not sure but any parent (western or not) can veto that a Thai child is taken out of Thailand (until at least 15). Anyway, refuse to sign passport and let the mother go to court if she wants it signed

From what I hear from Australian colleagues, you'd wish you were in Thailand where you would get a fair trial. I strongly suggest that you keep the relationship together for now

You don't win custody battles in Thai court by throwing dirt on the mother, you do it by proving that you are a good father, I suppose this apply in Australia too. By the way, possession of the child is probably a better expression rather than custody. Shared custody shouldn't be a problem I would think, but how many days would you get? 2? 3? Where would the mother if she becomes primary caretaker decide to live? Far away from you if she dislikes you? Primary caretaker can decide to do that

Gather evidence, first of all that you are a good father, then that the mother is neglecting the child. Good of you to write: - and is a very neglect full mother. Sad truth, If you don't have evidence of that, then it never happened

You need strong evidence, video is excellent. This sounds over the top but small video cameras are very cheap nowadays, they have sent many thieves to jail, 8 gig mini-sd card same as in mobile phones, records video and sound. What you need is that the mother is neglecting the child. Set her up: Give her money to go out and record that she comes home after midnight drunk, don't argue, just gather evidence and... contunue to gather evidence

If you have enough evidence of neglect, then contact social services before going to court. The father contacts social services about mother neglecting the child is a pretty good start of a custody battle

Good Luck

[expatdreamer]

Mate, firstly I am no lawyer but do have experience with the Oz family law court, albeit with an Oz born wife, not Thai wife.

Some mistakes you made:

1. Marrying in Australia - means you come under Oz family law.

2. Child born in Australia - means she can apply for child support under Oz law which is very generous. I pay $1000 AUS a month for one child - in Thailand the child support is a few thousand baht, or perhaps around $100 per month (so approx 1/10th).

2. Residing in Australia - I dont know your circumstances and whether you would have been able to live in Thailand, but it is far better from a legal perspective to reside in Thailand with your TGF / wife than in Oz. If things go pear shaped in Thailand under Thai law, anything you had before marraige is yours.

The only thing working in your favour at the moment is the short duration of the marraige. Two years means she wont automatically get the whole house, but she will be entitled to a fair percentage. Assuming you work and she doesnt, this will swing things in her favour - you can expect her to get perhaps 40% of the value of the equity in your house (and any other assets you have including super) but best to speak to a lawyer or two.

The court will favour the mother to look after the child in Oz - very little you say or do will change this - the court also wont care about how many lovers she may have had or intends to have - unless you have actual evidence of her abusing the child, they will consider the mother should have majority parental rights assuming she has stayed at home up until this point. So count on having to pay the full child support for the next 16 years. Make sure you can at least have the child one weekend every two weeks, as this does reduce child support you pay a little.

Work, then retire and settle down with a new TGF BUT stay in Thailand !

[rgs2001uk]

what is her visa statis. both parents sign for passport so do not sign. try and stop your wife from gaining full residency. were you married in thai or aus. try and gather past information about her past in thailand to discredit her personality when it comes to full custody. will help futher.

Hello toan, Her visa statis is still Temperary and we where married in Australia, It was the only way to ensure ( i thought at the time) on keeping my child if it did go bad. I just spoke to imagration this morning and they said pretty much the same thing as you. I think my lawyer is being a little sensitive to all parties. I know a baby needs its mother but!!

Have you got any more advice or questions?

"I think my lawyer is being a little sensitive to all parties."

The lawyer works for you, tell him how the cow eats the cabbage or change lawyers, you have hired him to act in your interests.

I dont know the status of your house, but I would get rid of it asap, say nothing to the wife.

You must have family you can trust, mother, father, brother or sister, transfer house to their name and get yourself a rent book and rental contract.

I know two people who did just that in the same position you are in

[kaorop]

Where would the mother if she becomes primary caretaker decide to live? Far away from you if she dislikes you? Primary caretaker can decide to do that

Not if you add a clause, in the custody documents, that states the child/ren cannot be taken out of the current school without both parents consent.

Even the high priced lawyer didnt spot that, worked out well for the children and me as she would have hightailed it as far as she could.

[venturalaw]

what is her visa statis. both parents sign for passport so do not sign. try and stop your wife from gaining full residency. were you married in thai or aus. try and gather past information about her past in thailand to discredit her personality when it comes to full custody. will help futher.

Hello toan, Her visa statis is still Temperary and we where married in Australia, It was the only way to ensure ( i thought at the time) on keeping my child if it did go bad. I just spoke to imagration this morning and they said pretty much the same thing as you. I think my lawyer is being a little sensitive to all parties. I know a baby needs its mother but!!

Have you got any more advice or questions?

My initial reaction is your lawyer's job is to advocate for you, not to be sensitive to all. There is an excellent family law attorney who is a partner in a major Australian family law firm. He lives in Chiang Mai but travels to Australia. Google Lanna Lawyers in Chiang Mai. He will help you.

[punch]

The child is also Thai because it has a Thai mother, both Australia and Thailand don't have an issue with dual nationality. Normally both parents must sign a Thai passport application.

What you need to do is contact a lawyer specialized in family law and plot your course of action with him. In the mean time you would need to gather evidence of the mother neglecting the child and you taking good care of the child.

Thanks mario, I have been in contact wit a family lawyer, that's why I know I am stuffed, Australia is one of the worst countries in the world when it comes to the husbans/fathers.. But my only concern is that she can not take our little one out of the country... So your saying if I don't sign for any sort of passport here in Australia there is no way our little one can leave??

[punch]

Australian law I'm not sure but any parent (western or not) can veto that a Thai child is taken out of Thailand (until at least 15). Anyway, refuse to sign passport and let the mother go to court if she wants it signed

From what I hear from Australian colleagues, you'd wish you were in Thailand where you would get a fair trial. I strongly suggest that you keep the relationship together for now

You don't win custody battles in Thai court by throwing dirt on the mother, you do it by proving that you are a good father, I suppose this apply in Australia too. By the way, possession of the child is probably a better expression rather than custody. Shared custody shouldn't be a problem I would think, but how many days would you get? 2? 3? Where would the mother if she becomes primary caretaker decide to live? Far away from you if she dislikes you? Primary caretaker can decide to do that

Gather evidence, first of all that you are a good father, then that the mother is neglecting the child. Good of you to write: - and is a very neglect full mother. Sad truth, If you don't have evidence of that, then it never happened

You need strong evidence, video is excellent. This sounds over the top but small video cameras are very cheap nowadays, they have sent many thieves to jail, 8 gig mini-sd card same as in mobile phones, records video and sound. What you need is that the mother is neglecting the child. Set her up: Give her money to go out and record that she comes home after midnight drunk, don't argue, just gather evidence and... contunue to gather evidence

If you have enough evidence of neglect, then contact social services before going to court. The father contacts social services about mother neglecting the child is a pretty good start of a custody battle

Good Luck

Thanks mike, I have a recorder but it would be a very hard thing to do. I am keeping a sdiary as advised but her drinking usualy happens randomnly.. I am hoping like hell she gets pinged for drink driving... a custody battle is not what I want. You are right...

[punch]

Mate, firstly I am no lawyer but do have experience with the Oz family law court, albeit with an Oz born wife, not Thai wife.

Some mistakes you made:

1. Marrying in Australia - means you come under Oz family law.

2. Child born in Australia - means she can apply for child support under Oz law which is very generous. I pay $1000 AUS a month for one child - in Thailand the child support is a few thousand baht, or perhaps around $100 per month (so approx 1/10th).

2. Residing in Australia - I dont know your circumstances and whether you would have been able to live in Thailand, but it is far better from a legal perspective to reside in Thailand with your TGF / wife than in Oz. If things go pear shaped in Thailand under Thai law, anything you had before marraige is yours.

The only thing working in your favour at the moment is the short duration of the marraige. Two years means she wont automatically get the whole house, but she will be entitled to a fair percentage. Assuming you work and she doesnt, this will swing things in her favour - you can expect her to get perhaps 40% of the value of the equity in your house (and any other assets you have including super) but best to speak to a lawyer or two.

The court will favour the mother to look after the child in Oz - very little you say or do will change this - the court also wont care about how many lovers she may have had or intends to have - unless you have actual evidence of her abusing the child, they will consider the mother should have majority parental rights assuming she has stayed at home up until this point. So count on having to pay the full child support for the next 16 years. Make sure you can at least have the child one weekend every two weeks, as this does reduce child support you pay a little.

Work, then retire and settle down with a new TGF BUT stay in Thailand !

Thanks mate, your right abourt so many things, I will loose 40% of assets, super and all that, but do you know anything about visa's . She is still on a temperary so is she entitled to any assets?? I have been told by an imagration officer that she can not make a claim, but them my lawyer tells me different.. bloody

comfusing..

[punch]

what is her visa statis. both parents sign for passport so do not sign. try and stop your wife from gaining full residency. were you married in thai or aus. try and gather past information about her past in thailand to discredit her personality when it comes to full custody. will help futher.

Hello toan, Her visa statis is still Temperary and we where married in Australia, It was the only way to ensure ( i thought at the time) on keeping my child if it did go bad. I just spoke to imagration this morning and they said pretty much the same thing as you. I think my lawyer is being a little sensitive to all parties. I know a baby needs its mother but!!

Have you got any more advice or questions?

"I think my lawyer is being a little sensitive to all parties."

The lawyer works for you, tell him how the cow eats the cabbage or change lawyers, you have hired him to act in your interests.

I dont know the status of your house, but I would get rid of it asap, say nothing to the wife.

You must have family you can trust, mother, father, brother or sister, transfer house to their name and get yourself a rent book and rental contract.

I know two people who did just that in the same position you are in

Hi mate, so many people have to me to make my assets vanish, but I have spoke to two different lawyers, one a long time ago at the first sign of trouble with my wife and the second 2 days ago. When I said should I do this they said no, you can not hide the money.. they advised just sit on what I got and hope for the best.. If you can tell me in a bit more detail about maybe a shifty way to do this, that would be great.. I don't want to leave my wife high and dry, she would get what I think is fair, but 25 years of hard work and 1 other divorce with a ozzie girl I am just staring to feel safe in my older age.. only to have a young girl come and take most of it away.. just not fair.

[punch]

what is her visa statis. both parents sign for passport so do not sign. try and stop your wife from gaining full residency. were you married in thai or aus. try and gather past information about her past in thailand to discredit her personality when it comes to full custody. will help futher.

Hello toan, Her visa statis is still Temperary and we where married in Australia, It was the only way to ensure ( i thought at the time) on keeping my child if it did go bad. I just spoke to imagration this morning and they said pretty much the same thing as you. I think my lawyer is being a little sensitive to all parties. I know a baby needs its mother but!!

Have you got any more advice or questions?

My initial reaction is your lawyer's job is to advocate for you, not to be sensitive to all. There is an excellent family law attorney who is a partner in a major Australian family law firm. He lives in Chiang Mai but travels to Australia. Google Lanna Lawyers in Chiang Mai. He will help you.

Thanks, I will have a look..

[MikeyIdea]

- a custody battle is not what I want

Unfortunately, you will get one sooner or later regardless of if you want it or not. Your child is only 2 years old now but that custody battle will decide much of the future for you and your child for a long long time, remember that

Plan before the court case comes, help her to provide evidence if you have to but make sure you get evidence. Buy a bottle of whiskey, open it and put it on the way to the car keys

I would not have written that had you not written - "and is a very neglect full mother" in your opening post

Good Luck

[expatdreamer]

The child is also Thai because it has a Thai mother, both Australia and Thailand don't have an issue with dual nationality. Normally both parents must sign a Thai passport application.

What you need to do is contact a lawyer specialized in family law and plot your course of action with him. In the mean time you would need to gather evidence of the mother neglecting the child and you taking good care of the child.

Thanks mario, I have been in contact wit a family lawyer, that's why I know I am stuffed, Australia is one of the worst countries in the world when it comes to the husbans/fathers.. But my only concern is that she can not take our little one out of the country... So your saying if I don't sign for any sort of passport here in Australia there is no way our little one can leave??

Punch, I believe all the information you seek is at https://www.passports.gov.au/Web/Newppt/Consent.aspx

Without a passport, I cant see how your child could leave Oz. There is also a contact number listed 131 232

And you are correct about your assertion re Oz being one of the worst countries when it comes to husbands/fathers.

[punch]

Thanks for all the replies, but does any one know or had and experiance with the fact that SHE is still on a temperary visa... I am getting told one thing by imagration and another by the lawyers.. If I listent to imagration I should just cancel her sponcership and give them the reasons why.. this they say could send her home, but my lawyer says this would not work, that she would surley get to stay and take me out.. my lawyer also added our child needs a mother.. This made me worry that she is to syperthetic to my child and wife... I got the feeling she does not know to much about money chasing thai girls. I know even ozzie girls can do the same and I have some great thai female friends who are not money chacers.. But my one is no poor inercent thai girl... As I sit her in the next room I can see on my laptop (that she did not log of from facebook messanger 4 weeks ago ) she is planing a date for Saturday night, both her and her thai girl friend, who is also married.. These women are just amazing. I want to tell her friends hubby, but she would do me a huge favor if she ran of with another man... Sorry for the info overload, but its just a bit of a release... I cant even have a beer, because then out it would all come..

Cheers

[expatdreamer]

Mate, firstly I am no lawyer but do have experience with the Oz family law court, albeit with an Oz born wife, not Thai wife.

Some mistakes you made:

1. Marrying in Australia - means you come under Oz family law.

2. Child born in Australia - means she can apply for child support under Oz law which is very generous. I pay $1000 AUS a month for one child - in Thailand the child support is a few thousand baht, or perhaps around $100 per month (so approx 1/10th).

2. Residing in Australia - I dont know your circumstances and whether you would have been able to live in Thailand, but it is far better from a legal perspective to reside in Thailand with your TGF / wife than in Oz. If things go pear shaped in Thailand under Thai law, anything you had before marraige is yours.

The only thing working in your favour at the moment is the short duration of the marraige. Two years means she wont automatically get the whole house, but she will be entitled to a fair percentage. Assuming you work and she doesnt, this will swing things in her favour - you can expect her to get perhaps 40% of the value of the equity in your house (and any other assets you have including super) but best to speak to a lawyer or two.

The court will favour the mother to look after the child in Oz - very little you say or do will change this - the court also wont care about how many lovers she may have had or intends to have - unless you have actual evidence of her abusing the child, they will consider the mother should have majority parental rights assuming she has stayed at home up until this point. So count on having to pay the full child support for the next 16 years. Make sure you can at least have the child one weekend every two weeks, as this does reduce child support you pay a little.

Work, then retire and settle down with a new TGF BUT stay in Thailand !

Thanks mate, your right abourt so many things, I will loose 40% of assets, super and all that, but do you know anything about visa's . She is still on a temperary so is she entitled to any assets?? I have been told by an imagration officer that she can not make a claim, but them my lawyer tells me different.. bloody

comfusing..

Punch - see enclosed for what is necessary to initiate divorce

http://www.familylawcourts.gov.au/wps/wcm/connect/FLC/Home/Separation+and+Divorce/Divorce/

Your wife may fulfil the cirteria of "ordinarily live in Australia and have done so for 12 months immediately before filing for divorce" or "that she intends to live in Australia indefinitely" but I am no expert on this as my ex wife was born and bred Ozzie, so have no experience with a Thai wife. There is still a requirement to be separated for 12 months before you can get the divorce certificate, but the split of assets doesnt have to wait for that (and if you are definitely going to split, the sooner the better as the longer you stay, the more she will get in the carve up of assets - just being brutally honest)

And sorry if my post wasnt more promising in terms of good news, unfortunately there isnt much good news here (at least for the Dads/husbands) and of course I have assumed no pre-nup was involved and your house/assets are in your name (not in a trust or some other such legal entity)

If the immigration officer is telling you she cant make a claim, ask him to point you in the direction of the relevant legislation/law where this is prescribed - you want to see this in writing. Most of this stuff is on the web - he just needs to give you the relevant reference to a part of an Act or some such where he is getting his information from.

[expatdreamer]

what is her visa statis. both parents sign for passport so do not sign. try and stop your wife from gaining full residency. were you married in thai or aus. try and gather past information about her past in thailand to discredit her personality when it comes to full custody. will help futher.

Hello toan, Her visa statis is still Temperary and we where married in Australia, It was the only way to ensure ( i thought at the time) on keeping my child if it did go bad. I just spoke to imagration this morning and they said pretty much the same thing as you. I think my lawyer is being a little sensitive to all parties. I know a baby needs its mother but!!

Have you got any more advice or questions?

"I think my lawyer is being a little sensitive to all parties."

The lawyer works for you, tell him how the cow eats the cabbage or change lawyers, you have hired him to act in your interests.

I dont know the status of your house, but I would get rid of it asap, say nothing to the wife.

You must have family you can trust, mother, father, brother or sister, transfer house to their name and get yourself a rent book and rental contract.

I know two people who did just that in the same position you are in

Hi mate, so many people have to me to make my assets vanish, but I have spoke to two different lawyers, one a long time ago at the first sign of trouble with my wife and the second 2 days ago. When I said should I do this they said no, you can not hide the money.. they advised just sit on what I got and hope for the best.. If you can tell me in a bit more detail about maybe a shifty way to do this, that would be great.. I don't want to leave my wife high and dry, she would get what I think is fair, but 25 years of hard work and 1 other divorce with a ozzie girl I am just staring to feel safe in my older age.. only to have a young girl come and take most of it away.. just not fair.

the court in Oz at least has the power to look at all transfers of assets, and wont look kindly on you trying to shift the asset if they uncover it - may end up forcing the asset back and giving her an even greater share. Again you need to talk to a lawyer on this one. If there is a way to do this successfully, then I would have thought more people would know about it. Agree with you it is not fair with you working 25 years.

[ludditeman]

Pretend you love her and want reconciliation (no arguments over anything from now on).

Give her a trip back to Thailand to see her parents (on her own if possible).

Or alternatively a trip for all of you, but you and daughter fly back to Oz the next day after you let her go shopping alone.

Cancel her Visa when she is in Thailand.

Sell your house, don't transfer it to a friend, do a real sale.

Hide the cash (notes in a safe at parents house, etc)

Then sit tight and let the inevitable happen.

If she manages to get back to Oz, at least the house will be gone.

A variation on this game is to want to buy her a better house, or a house in Thailand.

Find a new house, the fancier, the better.

Sell your house but never make the payment on the 'new' house.

Become unemployed, if she gets to the maintenance payments stage, they will be less.

Edited November 23, 2011 by ludditeman

[expatdreamer]

Pretend you love her and want reconciliation (no arguments over anything from now on).

Give her a trip back to Thailand to see her parents (on her own if possible).

Cancel her Visa when she is in Thailand.

Sell your house, don't transfer it to a friend, do a real sale.

Hide the cash (notes in a safe at parents house, etc)

Then sit tight and let the inevitable happen.

If she manages to get back to Oz, at least the house will be gone.

A variation on this game is to want to buy her a better house, or a house in Thailand.

Find a new house, the fancier, the better.

Sell your house but never make the payment on the 'new' house.

Yep, I think this is your best bet. If she remains in Thailand, then she wont have access to legal aid. Keep the child in Oz with your parents or sister when you take the wife over, say you want it to be like a second honeymoon.

[ludditeman]

Yep, I think this is your best bet. If she remains in Thailand, then she wont have access to legal aid. Keep the child in Oz with your parents or sister when you take the wife over, say you want it to be like a second honeymoon.

As expat suggested

A trip to Thailand for you and the wife as a second honeymoon (daughter left in Oz)

While you both look at buying her a fancy house in Thailand, or land.

Then sneak off and plane back to Oz alone.

Play on her greed!

[Mario2008]

That scheme will not look good in court when the child custody must be settled.

[poanoi]

I bought this pen video recorder, police thugs in asia in mind, but it may prove useful to you too.

I tested it and could video record 80 min. straight + voice, i think i paid 1.500 baht

http://www.spytechs....amera-dv640.htm

Edited November 23, 2011 by poanoi

[ludditeman]

That scheme will not look good in court when the child custody must be settled.

You wouldn't tell the court what you did.

Anyway you will lose custody to the mother if it gets to Oz court, you wouldn't be any worse off.

[expatdreamer]

Punch

Did a quick check on the web. See page 18 of the enclosed at http://www.immi.gov.au/allforms/booklets/1127.pdf Looks like that immigration officer was talking out of his or her a###. Page 18 shows that your wife will generally have the same rights as an Oz born person under the Family Law Act even on a temporary visa if the relationship breaks down. Also check out page 50 where it seems she can still get a permanent visa if your relationship breaks down, even before the 2 years is up, because there is a child involved.

So good news is she cant take the kid out of Oz without your permission because of the need for a passport. Bad news is you are screwed financially and she gets to become a permanent resident of Oz (and will of course be entitled to single mothers pension, family benefit Part A, Part B, rent assistance and all the other taxpayer funded goodies - easily adds up to $20k pa AUS - a tidy sum for a Thai who knows that you have to work 6 days a week of hard work for 10k baht a month in Thai - and getting these benefits all whilst partying it up with her girlfriends)

All the best mate - sorry it didnt work out better for you. Maybe others lurking on this forum can learn from this. If you have any info you wish to share for others to avoid (eg was she a bar girl, what was the age difference, etc), then that might be useful.

[ludditeman]

All the best mate - sorry it didnt work out better for you. Maybe others lurking on this forum can learn from this. If you have any info you wish to share for others to avoid (eg was she a bar girl, what was the age difference, etc), then that might be useful.

And that lesson is,

Never give your Thai partner the ability to live in (or travel to) your home country, unless you are prepared to be asset stripped.

(Especially if you live in Oz, cos they will still let Thais in if you have a kid with them while many other countries won't)

Edited November 23, 2011 by ludditeman

[seekingfriends]

what is her visa statis. both parents sign for passport so do not sign. try and stop your wife from gaining full residency. were you married in thai or aus. try and gather past information about her past in thailand to discredit her personality when it comes to full custody. will help futher.

ok. this is what she will get. only what she put towards the house. whick means not a lot . you will have to sell the house. or buy her out .

so you will not loose a lot over the house.second you will have to pay child maintance till the child is 18 even if she lives overseas. they take the money direct from your salery .she will not be able to take the child out of the country without your permission . they will block her at at the airport. most times the child lives with the mother . but you will get access to the child as normal .if it gets into a shit fight with your wife them she will make it difficult to see the child .use some common sence when dealing with her .if she has not not got full residency that could be your ace in the pocket with her attude towards you .go see a lawyer who deals in divorces ,where do you live if in sydney , there are some good lawyers around.who deal in this stuff. and it will not cost you a lot . james hat yai