Is Your Wife/Partner An X Bar Girl? My Hand Is Up.

[thaiIand]

scropio please refrain from creating fake threads about me wanting to get married quick and answer me. How did you tell your family and friends that your wife spread her legs for 30$ a pop? You said you were proud of her being a bar girl. If you havnt told everyone then you're ashamed. This thread isnt about me, im just a young guy with a young chick whos giving you a reality check. you dont need to know more.

as i said before i have no problem with desperate people marrying bargirls. But these thread where you act proud and unashamed are just pure annoying bs.

Edited December 2, 2011 by thaiIand

[Wallaby]

Everybody agrees. Women always marry for money - which is why you see so many ordinary couples in the West with an old man and a far younger woman.

True, see it more and more. Old man with big breated blonde under the arm more frequently.

[hehehoho]

Well you know what is the best facial cream.

Perhaps these prostitutes were just glowing radiant.

[F1fanatic]

All women are prostitutes, it's only the price the varies.

Prostitution has many degrees, sex before marriage can be a prostitution of morals.

Let me think what I would prefer. A girl in farangland of about 40 years of age, maybe had say 10 different men. A couple of long term relationships so they banged nearly every night which I would suggest is probably the same, if not more, than the amount of shags a bar girl has.

She'd be looking a bit frayed around the edges, not a real pleasure to wake up with in the morning. Will expect to be wined and dined on a regular basis. Will expect expensive gifts and regular shopping expeditions. We will have an extremely expensive marriage. She will take leave from work to have kids then whine and moan because money is tight and the lifestyle has to suffer. We will divorce and she will have custody of any children, most of the assets. I will be living in a rundown studio appartment with the ass out of my pants for about 16 years because I have to pay an enormous amount of child support which is determined on a percentage of my gross wage (not after expenses and tax etc).

She will find a new man, go back to work, so have two incomes plus my payments to live a quite nice life. I will meet a new woman who won't be too pleased that a lot of my money goes to my ex so will not be too keen to get into a relationship (yes money can be the deal breaker).

Or

I can go to Thailand, find a young nubile nymph that makes me happy, asks for very little, I can wake with a smile on my face every morning. I can feel young again. She is low maintenance, doesn't drink, smoke or go out to clubs and is easily pleased (must be to be with me). If she tires of me and leaves I can just go find another.

No prizes for guessing which I would chose. And for those that think I am jaded, no I've never been married and I have no kids. I've just seen my friends go through hell in farangland and wouldn't wish it on anyone. Give me a Thai girl any day. Bar girls are fine, that is only their job, it's the person inside that counts.

Well put. The only reason more western men don't do that is that they don't know.

Agree, well put - from someone who has gone through, and continues to go through, the hell.

I would also add that another reason western men dont do it is because of the perceived stigma attached. Saying you are going to Thailand immediately puts you in the "dirty old man" or "desperate" category, not only as viewed by falang women, but even some falang men. I try to convince some of my never married and childless buddies in their 30s and 40s to go to Thailand for a holiday, but they simply wont do it for fear of what people will say - they have even said exactly this "but what will I tell so and so" or "how will I explain it in the office".....

Oh well, more Thai women for the rest of us.

Rubbish. Old men that are unable to get women in the West are only too happy to come here!

Yes, there is a 'stigma' - but that is only a consideration for those taking on long-term (they hope) relationships.

[GuestHouse]

So why do so many guys who marry Thai women wind up being pussy whipped by women who we are told know their place.

The OP gives an insight into what this must be like, hiding in fear from his wife when she's in a bad mood.

Where have you been GH. Missed your stuff.

I've been busy with work ....but I see not much has changed in my absence.

[F1fanatic]

Everybody agrees. Women always marry for money - which is why you see so many ordinary couples in the West with an old man and a far younger woman.

True, see it more and more. Old man with big breated blonde under the arm more frequently.

Is that Paul Daniels? Hardly the 'average' couple...

Then again, I'm sure I mix in less exalted circles than you.

[scorpio]

Tanithai, in response to you question, yes everyone of my family knows my wifes history. No problems there whatsoever. Eveyone on here knows now, no problems there whatsoever :-) ive nothing to be ashamed of, ive nothing to hide ( unlike a lot of others, yourself inc ) anyway i rest my case now, enough said, its you who has been been made out the sad fool in paradise by your replies and the way you describe woman in general.

away for a beer, sabai sabai :-)

[GuestHouse]

So why do so many guys who marry Thai women wind up being pussy whipped by women who we are told know their place.

The OP gives an insight into what this must be like, hiding in fear from his wife when she's in a bad mood.

I don't think that is just a Thai thing. I also think you may be taking him too literally. I have often hidden from farang women during their tantrums, not really out of fear but more because I really didn't care to be hearing it over and over again. Much rather be sitting in a bar with a few mates having a laugh as opposed to putting up with tantrums that I really don't care to much about.

This raises another question - If you hid from western women (were pussy whipped in the West) and now you find yourself hiding from Thai women (Pussy Whipped in the East) - Is is simply that you can't handle women?

Maybe "Paying" gives you a sense of control you do not really have.

[Wallaby]

scropio please refrain from creating fake threads about me wanting to get married quick and answer me. How did you tell your family and friends that your wife spread her legs for 30$ a pop? You said you were proud of her being a bar girl. If you havnt told everyone then you're ashamed. This thread isnt about me, im just a young guy with a young chick whos giving you a reality check. you dont need to know more.

as i said before i have no problem with desperate people marrying bargirls. But these thread where you act proud and unashamed are just pure annoying bs.

Quite the obnoxious type aren't you.

What business is it of yours what he tells his family and friends. If your gf gets herpes are you going to tell all your mates? if your gf blows some guy are you going to tell all your mates?

Why do you call people who marry bargirls desperate. This may come as a shock to you but some of us have had farang women before and prefer Thai girls and are not bothered by what they did in a past life.

Those that take issue with it have a sad and lonely life to be so worried about what others are doing. You are a young guy with a young chick. I am an old guy with a young chick, I'll let you guess which one of us is the more happy.

I think you have a bad case of a superiority complex but then again, you are young and immature so don't worry your view will change.

[ludditeman]

So why do so many guys who marry Thai women wind up being pussy whipped by women who we are told know their place.

The OP gives an insight into what this must be like, hiding in fear from his wife when she's in a bad mood.

Where have you been GH. Missed your stuff.

I've been busy with work ....but I see not much has changed in my absence.

Any man with common sense hides when his woman is in a mood. It would be daft not to.

I go out to Thai beer bars with my pals to look at the uni girls, gfs mood is always nice when I return, if it wasn't I would go out again and return next morning.

(and she knows I would do that)

It's not what I call being 'pussy whipped'

'pussy whipped' would be staying at home and listening to it!

Edited December 2, 2011 by ludditeman

[janverbeem]

scropio please refrain from creating fake threads about me wanting to get married quick and answer me. How did you tell your family and friends that your wife spread her legs for 30$ a pop? You said you were proud of her being a bar girl. If you havnt told everyone then you're ashamed. This thread isnt about me, im just a young guy with a young chick whos giving you a reality check. you dont need to know more.

as i said before i have no problem with desperate people marrying bargirls. But these thread where you act proud and unashamed are just pure annoying bs.

Quite the obnoxious type aren't you.

What business is it of yours what he tells his family and friends. If your gf gets herpes are you going to tell all your mates? if your gf blows some guy are you going to tell all your mates?

Why do you call people who marry bargirls desperate. This may come as a shock to you but some of us have had farang women before and prefer Thai girls and are not bothered by what they did in a past life.

Those that take issue with it have a sad and lonely life to be so worried about what others are doing. You are a young guy with a young chick. I am an old guy with a young chick, I'll let you guess which one of us is the more happy.

I think you have a bad case of a superiority complex but then again, you are young and immature so don't worry your view will change.

Well,my bets are on Thailand.

However you may also be very happy................untill you wake up that is.

[thaimate]

Everybody agrees. Women always marry for money - which is why you see so many ordinary couples in the West with an old man and a far younger woman.

In the west there used to be a bias about women marrying black men, and in those days there were very few such marriages.

Today in the west there is a bias about women marrying older men, so there are very few such marriages.

Racism has been replaced by ageism as a barrier to marriage.

It would require a great deal of money for a woman to break such a barrier.

Believe me there is still a bias against white girls marrying black men ,not a lot of bias against younger women marrying older men ,especially rich ones ,just jelousy

Edited December 2, 2011 by thaimate

[HardenedSoul]

All women are prostitutes, it's only the price the varies.

That's ridiculous and men who harbour beliefs of that ilk confirm my suspicions that the blame for problems that arise when a farang marries or conducts a relationship with a bargirl that extends beyond a cervix-pounding lie squarely with the man.

Any farang guy who's never had problems attracting and engaging in relationships with attractive women at home or here in Thailand on the strength of his personality, his looks or a combination thereof, would likely NEVER consider marrying or hooking up with a Thai prostitute. I've seen too many farang guys go with what I call the "Southpaw" approach. Just like hapless, punchdrunk pugilists, they lead with the wrong hand - the one with the wallet in it - dangling the carrot of security and an upgrade in lifestyle several times removed from that of a typical bargirl. Maybe they really don't have anything else to offer. Anyway, the unspoken terms of the deal are generally that he provides the readies, she leaves the bar and performs semen receptacle duties for him exclusively but when it all goes Pete Tong, he starts bawling like a pussy even though he himself has been out tomcatting around.

I believe it takes a certain type of cretin to believe that he can buy another human being's genuine affection, loyalty and respect with a monthly stipend whilst, simultaneously, trying to exercise control over the people outside her immediate family she sees and speaks to. That type of cretin, gentlemen, is generally old, corpulent and has issues with women, here or at home, asserting any modicum of independence.

I don't wish ill on anyone who takes it upon himself to hook up with a brass but, 9 times out of 10, if she cleans your clock financially and/or emotionally, you're only getting back what you put out in the universe.

[Wallaby]

So why do so many guys who marry Thai women wind up being pussy whipped by women who we are told know their place.

The OP gives an insight into what this must be like, hiding in fear from his wife when she's in a bad mood.

I don't think that is just a Thai thing. I also think you may be taking him too literally. I have often hidden from farang women during their tantrums, not really out of fear but more because I really didn't care to be hearing it over and over again. Much rather be sitting in a bar with a few mates having a laugh as opposed to putting up with tantrums that I really don't care to much about.

This raises another question - If you hid from western women (were pussy whipped in the West) and now you find yourself hiding from Thai women (Pussy Whipped in the East) - Is is simply that you can't handle women?

Maybe "Paying" gives you a sense of control you do not really have.

Who said I pay? I have paid for it plenty of times but not with my gf as she wasn't a bg.

Hiding from drama has nothing to do with being pussy whipped. I just can't be bothered putting up with the drama. I just don't see the point in getting into an argument with someone who is having a temper tantrum. If it gets too much for me or her then we can leave.

When I was younger I would argue back but where does it really get you. I'd rather not bother with it, ignore it. I find life a lot less stressful that way. If the girl has many temper tantrums then I just leave, I don't want the grief nor do I want to put in that much effort. Life is too short, just enjoy it.

[wandrinstar]

20 Years here and I had never heard of Sin Sod before bar girls bought ferangs home. Old Thais never expected ferangs to follow the tradition . Just being a ferang meant an easy life for all round if you didn't push him..

[Wallaby]

All women are prostitutes, it's only the price the varies.

That's ridiculous and men who harbour beliefs of that ilk confirm my suspicions that the blame for problems that arise when a farang marries or conducts a relationship with a bargirl that extends beyond a cervix-pounding lie squarely with the man.

Any farang guy who's never had problems attracting and engaging in relationships with attractive women at home or here in Thailand on the strength of his personality, his looks or a combination thereof, would likely NEVER consider marrying or hooking up with a Thai prostitute. I've seen too many farang guys go with what I call the "Southpaw" approach. Just like hapless, punchdrunk pugilists, they lead with the wrong hand - the one with the wallet in it - dangling the carrot of security and an upgrade in lifestyle several times removed from that of a typical bargirl. Maybe they really don't have anything else to offer. Anyway, the unspoken terms of the deal are generally that he provides the readies, she leaves the bar and performs semen receptacle duties for him exclusively but when it all goes Pete Tong, he starts bawling like a pussy even though he himself has been out tomcatting around.

I believe it takes a certain type of cretin to believe that he can buy another human being's genuine affection, loyalty and respect with a monthly stipend whilst, simultaneously, trying to exercise control over the people outside her immediate family she sees and speaks to. That type of cretin, gentlemen, is generally old, corpulent and has issues with women, here or at home, asserting any modicum of independence.

I don't wish ill on anyone who takes it upon himself to hook up with a brass but, 9 times out of 10, if she cleans your clock financially and/or emotionally, you're only getting back what you put out in the universe.

I don't know of too many guys that would marry a farang girl that wouldn't be exclusive to him. I don't know of too many guys that go on a first date with any girl that tries to put himself in the best possible light, including money.

Aren't we all cretins because when we are trying to win the affection of the opposite sex we hide our shortcomings and hilight our positives, sometimes saying what we think they want to hear? In effect you are 'buying' another human by not being completely open and hiding your bad points. Or on your fist date do you let rip a few farts and pick your nose just to show the girl what you are really like to live with.

Again, another poster that thinks they are far superior to others simply because of who their choice of partner. When I see an old guy with a young girl I smile. I doubt very much you would smile at their happiness.

[expatdreamer]

Rubbish. Old men that are unable to get women in the West are only too happy to come here!

Yes, there is a 'stigma' - but that is only a consideration for those taking on long-term (they hope) relationships.

Yes, of course old men (50s and 60s) are happy to go to Thailand - after they have been burnt a couple of times in the West and generally taken to the cleaners. My point was that younger men in their 30s and 40s are often not prepared to go to Thailand even just for a holiday to vist the country for the first time. When I talk about such men, I am talking about professional men with good jobs/incomes in the West. If they were prepared to visit, it might just open their eyes to the opportunities available, and help them avoid the mistakes the old men made.

But one thing is for sure - these younger men are becoming increasingly aware of the financial and emotional risks in forming a long term relationship and having children here in the West, after seeing so much carnage around them. So relationships in my part of the world are becoming increasingly fleeting and short term in nature IMHO - with many not even bothering with long term relationships - and I am talking about fit decent looking men worth $1M+ , so not exactly undesirable.

[TingTawng]

Everybody agrees. Women always marry for money - which is why you see so many ordinary couples in the West with an old man and a far younger woman.

You assume marrying up must always mean a young woman and older man? And "always marry for money"? Well I see your tactic here - exaggerate in order to ridicule a social pattern that rankles you.

Women do tend to marry up. Money is the proxy for "safety and protection" - through history, man has always been the provider. Nature hasn't made men want women as a protector and provider - men want women more for sex and procreation. I know your little PC siren is spinning around in your head now and you're going to talk about my knuckles dragging across the floor in your next comment, but I'm just describing the baser instincts and differences between men and women and what they want from relationships. Above those base instincts, we all look for personality, character etc - but to deny preconditions is to be dishonest. I'm not saying all relationships by the way - but if you took a typical relationship, I think my description would fit pretty well.

[Wallaby]

Everybody agrees. Women always marry for money - which is why you see so many ordinary couples in the West with an old man and a far younger woman.

You assume marrying up must always mean a young woman and older man? And "always marry for money"? Well I see your tactic here - exaggerate in order to ridicule a social pattern that rankles you.

Women do tend to marry up. Money is the proxy for "safety and protection" - through history, man has always been the provider. Nature hasn't made men want women as a protector and provider - men want women more for sex and procreation. I know your little PC siren is spinning around in your head now and you're going to talk about my knuckles dragging across the floor in your next comment, but I'm just describing the baser instincts and differences between men and women and what they want from relationships. Above those base instincts, we all look for personality, character etc - but to deny preconditions is to be dishonest. I'm not saying all relationships by the way - but if you took a typical relationship, I think my description would fit pretty well.

Well said.

But for some reason there are people that don't wish to see others have happiness and they themselves only seem to be happy when denigrating the choice of others. They must have their ego stroked to make themselves feel better.

Edited December 2, 2011 by Wallaby

[GreenSnapper]

Everybody agrees. Women always marry for money - which is why you see so many ordinary couples in the West with an old man and a far younger woman.

You assume marrying up must always mean a young woman and older man? And "always marry for money"? Well I see your tactic here - exaggerate in order to ridicule a social pattern that rankles you.

Women do tend to marry up. Money is the proxy for "safety and protection" - through history, man has always been the provider. Nature hasn't made men want women as a protector and provider - men want women more for sex and procreation. I know your little PC siren is spinning around in your head now and you're going to talk about my knuckles dragging across the floor in your next comment, but I'm just describing the baser instincts and differences between men and women and what they want from relationships. Above those base instincts, we all look for personality, character etc - but to deny preconditions is to be dishonest. I'm not saying all relationships by the way - but if you took a typical relationship, I think my description would fit pretty well.

In the West, about 90% of women marry up.

It is part of their genetic program, same as it is part of a man's genetic program to marry young women.

[drdaveperry]

Everybody agrees. Women always marry for money - which is why you see so many ordinary couples in the West with an old man and a far younger woman.

You assume marrying up must always mean a young woman and older man? And "always marry for money"? Well I see your tactic here - exaggerate in order to ridicule a social pattern that rankles you.

Women do tend to marry up. Money is the proxy for "safety and protection" - through history, man has always been the provider. Nature hasn't made men want women as a protector and provider - men want women more for sex and procreation. I know your little PC siren is spinning around in your head now and you're going to talk about my knuckles dragging across the floor in your next comment, but I'm just describing the baser instincts and differences between men and women and what they want from relationships. Above those base instincts, we all look for personality, character etc - but to deny preconditions is to be dishonest. I'm not saying all relationships by the way - but if you took a typical relationship, I think my description would fit pretty well.

Bravo

[Wallaby]

Everybody agrees. Women always marry for money - which is why you see so many ordinary couples in the West with an old man and a far younger woman.

True, see it more and more. Old man with big breated blonde under the arm more frequently.

Is that Paul Daniels? Hardly the 'average' couple...

Then again, I'm sure I mix in less exalted circles than you.

No, he's a well known, or infamous aussie Doctor, Geoffrey Edelsten.

[GuestHouse]

Who said I pay? I have paid for it plenty of times but not with my gf as she wasn't a bg.

In Post 189 you said

All women are prostitutes, it's only the price the varies.

So let me get this straight:

All Women are Prostitutes

You don't pay for it because your Girlfriend was not a Bar Girl

So it seems all women are prostitutes except you girlfriend???

Perhaps she's with you for your razor sharp intellect.

[taninthai]

Tanithai, in response to you question, yes everyone of my family knows my wifes history. No problems there whatsoever. Eveyone on here knows now, no problems there whatsoever :-) ive nothing to be ashamed of, ive nothing to hide ( unlike a lot of others, yourself inc ) anyway i rest my case now, enough said, its you who has been been made out the sad fool in paradise by your replies and the way you describe woman in general.

away for a beer, sabai sabai :-)

you are really confused again i did not ask you any questions about your wife our if your family knows she was a whore i have also not made any replies describing women thai or farang please make sure you reply to the right posters

thank you

[drdaveperry]

I want my very own barl girl............. I am so jealous of everyone on this forum. you argue over history and reptuation. My goodness just leave each other alone and deal with your own fractured lives.

[JurgenG]

What I understand from this thread is marrying a bg is in fact the union of desperate person with an other desperate person.

Can any good gets out of this union? Weird enough it seems yes. Sometime.

[TingTawng]

All women are prostitutes, it's only the price the varies.

That's ridiculous and men who harbour beliefs of that ilk confirm my suspicions that the blame for problems that arise when a farang marries or conducts a relationship with a bargirl that extends beyond a cervix-pounding lie squarely with the man.

Any farang guy who's never had problems attracting and engaging in relationships with attractive women at home or here in Thailand on the strength of his personality, his looks or a combination thereof, would likely NEVER consider marrying or hooking up with a Thai prostitute. I've seen too many farang guys go with what I call the "Southpaw" approach. Just like hapless, punchdrunk pugilists, they lead with the wrong hand - the one with the wallet in it - dangling the carrot of security and an upgrade in lifestyle several times removed from that of a typical bargirl. Maybe they really don't have anything else to offer. Anyway, the unspoken terms of the deal are generally that he provides the readies, she leaves the bar and performs semen receptacle duties for him exclusively but when it all goes Pete Tong, he starts bawling like a pussy even though he himself has been out tomcatting around.

I believe it takes a certain type of cretin to believe that he can buy another human being's genuine affection, loyalty and respect with a monthly stipend whilst, simultaneously, trying to exercise control over the people outside her immediate family she sees and speaks to. That type of cretin, gentlemen, is generally old, corpulent and has issues with women, here or at home, asserting any modicum of independence.

I don't wish ill on anyone who takes it upon himself to hook up with a brass but, 9 times out of 10, if she cleans your clock financially and/or emotionally, you're only getting back what you put out in the universe.

I don't know of too many guys that would marry a farang girl that wouldn't be exclusive to him. I don't know of too many guys that go on a first date with any girl that tries to put himself in the best possible light, including money.

Aren't we all cretins because when we are trying to win the affection of the opposite sex we hide our shortcomings and hilight our positives, sometimes saying what we think they want to hear? In effect you are 'buying' another human by not being completely open and hiding your bad points. Or on your fist date do you let rip a few farts and pick your nose just to show the girl what you are really like to live with.

Again, another poster that thinks they are far superior to others simply because of who their choice of partner. When I see an old guy with a young girl I smile. I doubt very much you would smile at their happiness.

What I've learnt on thaivisa.com is this phenomena of the "noble farang" - where members compete to see who can be the most self-righteous and morally pure. Failing that, there's the other tactic of saying how opposite they are to the stereotypical Thai/farang relationship e.g. someone will mention their Thai partner earns more than them, but that's cool because he does all the housework, and cooks the meals - that kind of thing.

At the end of the day, it comes down to what you want, and can you get on together. If you want nothing from a relationship, you wouldn't be in one. Some will say "I just want company" - but give them a choice of a homeless guy, or a moderately rich guy (same personalities), they'll go with the money. So there's always preconditions, however ignoble and prosaic they may be. But after those preconditions, it's about character and personality, and quite often - these are the only two things that matter as the years roll by (see, I'm not all cynical).

Edited December 2, 2011 by TingTawng

[Ulysses G.]

I don't wish ill on anyone who takes it upon himself to hook up with a brass but, 9 times out of 10, if she cleans your clock financially and/or emotionally, you're only getting back what you put out in the universe.

From what I have seen over many years in different countries, the odds of getting hurt/screwed over in a relationship are not that much lower with a "good girl" (not that most men are any better). At this point in time, I am quite happy to be a bachelor and stay that way.

Edited December 2, 2011 by Ulysses G.

[Wallaby]

Who said I pay? I have paid for it plenty of times but not with my gf as she wasn't a bg.

In Post 189 you said

All women are prostitutes, it's only the price the varies.

So let me get this straight:

All Women are Prostitutes

You don't pay for it because your Girlfriend was not a Bar Girl

So it seems all women are prostitutes except you girlfriend???

Perhaps she's with you for your razor sharp intellect.

I'll make it easy for you. All women are prostitutes, it's only the price that varies. Just saying every women has their price and also that men always end up paying in one way or another. My gf isn't/wasn't a bargirl but I'm sure, like every other women that she would have her price. I have bugger all money so she can't want me for that, I'm starting to get the love handles so it can't be for my body, I'm certainly no Brad Pitt. But I do treat her well and I don't have a temper. I've never asked her why she is with me, I'm just happy she is and that is all I need. Of course not saying it will definitely last the distance but I have no reason to have a wandering eye.

Just this week the girls in my office were talking about something they call a 'leave pass'. Apparently it is ok for married women to have 5 men (usually the rich and/or famous) they are allowed to shag. They were all discussing who their 5 would be.

Now if I or any of the guys started having a similar discussion in the office about 5 girls we can shag out of wedlock then the girls would be outraged and complain of us dirty old men.

Sorry to go off topic.

[Wallaby]

I don't wish ill on anyone who takes it upon himself to hook up with a brass but, 9 times out of 10, if she cleans your clock financially and/or emotionally, you're only getting back what you put out in the universe.

From what I have seen over many years in different countries, the odds of getting hurt/screwed over in a relationship are not that much lower with a "good girl" (not that most men are any better). At this point in time, I am quite happy to be a bachelor and stay that way.

Ain't that the truth.