Famous Thai Fortune Tellers Spark Idea To Draft Law On Telling The Future

[hellodolly]

"They say that people should not be allowed to claim to be fortune tellers if they cannot based their predictions on a trusted form of astrology or a credited organization."

So only real seers of the future are allowed?

The mind boggles

Indeed and how do they become accredited if they can not practice their trade.

a trusted form of astrology.

That is their roundabout way for them saying they are the only ones who can OK a new seer.

Pretty much a moot point any how 98% of them are phonies. And I am not sure about the other 2%.

[DoctorG]

un-bloody-believable

[Orac]

Sounds like a law that that will fit in well in Thailand and when it is zealously enforced for political reasons then we should see plenty of undesirables off the streets - next time someone asks you if you think it is going to rain you had better think twice. They will be able silence all those pesky opinion writers in the national press as well.

[pepi2005]

They say non-credited tellers of the future should be barred from causing widespread panic with their predictions.

and in contrast to that, what is the definition of a 'credited' teller please?

[pepi2005]

I just wait for someone of the government putting this into law and then declaring Thailand as the 'hub of credited fortune-tellers'.

[sysardman]

They say non-credited tellers of the future should be barred from causing widespread panic with their predictions.

and in contrast to that, what is the definition of a 'credited' teller please?

Maybe one that's made a lot of money telling fortunes

[Tanaka]

They say non-credited tellers of the future should be barred from causing widespread panic with their predictions.

and in contrast to that, what is the definition of a 'credited' teller please?

Red shirt leader and/or member of the present government.

[sysardman]

"They say that people should not be allowed to claim to be fortune tellers if they cannot based their predictions on a trusted form of astrology or a credited organization."

So only real seers of the future are allowed?

The mind boggles

Indeed and how do they become accredited if they can not practice their trade.

a trusted form of astrology.

That is their roundabout way for them saying they are the only ones who can OK a new seer.

Pretty much a moot point any how 98% of them are phonies. And I am not sure about the other 2%.

Woe! Woe! and thrice Woe, I have consulted the oracle and I have seen the future!!! After the first floods recede there will come a false prophet from the west. He will spread the word of the false god Lucre and all who hear his words will proclaim this man's greatness for has he not walked through the valley of death and emerged unscathed while all around are cast down to suffer poverty, disease and many hardships.

Edited January 14, 2012 by sysardman

[bigbamboo]

Is it the first day of April already?

[BigJohnnyBKK]

This government will never enact any law that won't bring a prophet to themselves.

That is brilliant! Did you mean to make a joke?

[khunken]

There once was a teller named Hrishnan

Who said 'You're a very lucky man'

It was on Sukhumvit Road

I said it's a load

Now he tries his luck on Khao San

[kimamey]

This government will never enact any law that won't bring a prophet to themselves.

[elgato]

I predict that it will never happen.

[FNQ]

"They say that people should not be allowed to claim to be fortune tellers if they cannot based their predictions on a trusted form of astrology or a credited organization."

So only real seers of the future are allowed?

The mind boggles

"credited organization" = Seers R US ?

[sirchai]

Pinyo suggested that the nation's leading fortune tellers should come together and submit a draft to the government. They should be responsible for 80 percent of the law's content, while the administration should offer the remaining 20 percent.

<deleted>? Is it again April's fool day? Time's passing by so fast, that's almost unbelievable.....

[sirchai]

Once upon a time a man called Shinawat went to the fairground in Bangkok. He came upon a tent advertising fortune telling and so, for a laugh, he went in.

Hello deary, "said the Fortune Teller " cross my palm with purple paper with a picture of the King on and I'll tell you your fortune." "You what? 1000 baht??" said Shinawat "What happened to silver then?" "Doesn't buy much these days." said the Fortune teller.

So money changed hands and the gypsy gazed into her crystal ball. "The clouds are parting, " she said, "I can see, I can see, a career in the armed forces, and also , I can see, I can see OOOH!!!! AAAAH EEEK!!!" and she looked quite faint.

"What is it?" asked .Shinawat "I cannot tell you." replied the gypsy"but for another 1000 baht I will sell you this locket, and I will write what I have seen on a piece of paper, and I will place this paper in the locket, and you must not cast your gaze onto this paper until your last, dying day."

"OK then." said Shinawat and did as he was asked.

Now it just so happened that Shinawat was about to go into basic training in the Army, so he believed everything that the fortune telling gypsy had to say.

Shinawat got through his basic training with no problems, but on his last day before being transferred to a unit, his commanding officer asked him what was in the locket.

"I really don't know, "replied Shinawat " It is my fortune, written down there by a gypsy Fortune Teller and I may not look at it until my last dying day."

"May I have a look though?" asked the CO. "I suppose so." said Shinawat.

The CO opened the locket and unfolded the piece of paper "OOOH!! AAAH!! EEEK!!" he said. "We can't have people like you in the Army I'm afraid." and sure enough, within 2 days he was discharged with no explanation.

"How very strange." thought Shinawat "Never mind, I was growing to dislike the army anyway, I always wanted to be a fighter pilot! I'm going to join the RTAF!!" and so he did.

As before, he got through his basic training with flying colours and he was about to be transferred to an air base when the CO asked to see him."It's always been a subject of much curiosity," said the CO, "as to what is in that silver locket that makes such green marks upon your neck. You always try to hide it beneath your dog tags but I must know what is inside."

Shinawat said " It is my fortune, placed in there by a gypsy Fortune teller, and I don't know what it says. I'm not allowed to see it until my last dying day, but I suppose you may look if you really must."

Sure enough, the CO opened the locket and carefully unfolded the piece of paper. As he looked at it, his face paled and he spluttered "OOOH!! AAAH!! EEEK!!" and he took a step back. He carefully folded up the piece of paper and put it back into the locket. "I see." is all he said. "That'll be all."

The next day, Shinawat got an official letter discharging him from the RTAF, saying he was colour blind, had a square head and had 2 left feet. And many other spurious excuses.

"bahulleyang!!" thought Shinawat , "I always wanted to fight for my country. Now there's just the Navy left and I didn't want to wear a hankie round my neck."

So Shinawat joined the Navy. They were a little concerned that he had been discharged from both the Army and the Air Force, but as they both just said he was unsuitable, they didn't know why and let him in.

He breezed through the basic training and this time, he didn't have a nosy CO so he was transferred to HMS Thairakthai and sent to the Gulf of Thailand.

One day, while he was swabbing the deck, as it was the powder monkey's day off, his locket, which still made him very green about the neck (but what do you expect if you buy cheap jewellery from a fairground in Bangkok) was glinting in the sun. The captain happened to spot this and asked what it was.

"Here we go again." thought Shinawat. "It is a locket, within which is a piece of paper, upon which is written in the hand of a fairground Fortune Teller, that which she saw in the crystal ball. I have been forbidden to look at it until my last dying day, and if it's all the same to you, I'd really rather not let anyone else see it either."

"Oh go on," said the Captain " I'll be your best friend and everything." "What will that entail exactly?" asked Shinawat who thought that if he played his cards right he could get promoted to officer and stop wearing hankies round his neck.

"Well, for a start " said the Captain " I'll let you into a secret. The Thai Royal Navy hasn't had powder monkeys for at least 10 years.And I'm not totally sure we even still swab the decks any more either. You could do some cushy job round here like cook. Then you'd only have to really work if terrorists took over the ship trying to steal nuclear weapons and we're not as careless as the yanks."

"Oh alright then, "said Shinawat , taking leave of his senses, "You can look."

The captain opened the locket and carefully unfolded the piece of paper and read it. "OOOH!! AAAAH!! EEEEK!!" he said, tripping over on the wet deck (so I suppose they do swab them after all)"Oh no no no, we can't have you in the Navy, that would never do." "Why not?" said Shinawat, "Please tell me."

"I can't!" Said the Captain "It's too horrible. Put on this life jacket."

Shinawat put on the life jacket and was unceremoniously pushed over board. He was washed up on a desert island but unfortunately, it was not even a typical cartoon joke desert island. It didn't even a a single coconut palm on, just sand. And no fresh water.

"What a to do. " said Shinawat aloud.

Days past, and Shinawat got more and more tired, and weaker and weaker.When things got really bad, Shinawat decided this must surely be his last dying day.

He very carefully opened the locket and gingerly, religiously took out the piece of paper inside. Very slowly he unfolded the piece of paper and brought it forward to his dying eyes to see, finally what was on it.

It was blank.

"Hang on, I'm looking at the wrong side." he thought.

He slowly, carefully turned the piece of paper over and....

wait for it

A gust of wind blows the piece of paper away.

My hamster just died laughing...

[maidu]

My ex-wife from long ago in a faraway land run by a man with a white goatee, wearing a red white and blue top hat, was a successful fortune teller. She had a large and devoted clientelle, mostly women with questions about future romantic prospects. She also had letters coming in from around the world (years b4 internet) with paper money and requests for predictions. My wife knew it was bogus, and so did I, but we didn't mind the added income.

[retell]

hopefully this also covers the promises and future visions of people running for government

[Gers1873]

Do male fortune tellers in Thailand have crystall balls? If so can they see the happy ending before it occurs???

[maidu]

People in general need fortune tellers like they need religion. They're too spooked to think for themselves and face the world as it really is. Hocus pocus is usually ok for kiddies (if it doesn't give them bad dreams), but adults should mature out of it. Science and nature - is the way. ok granted, for diversions, it's fun to sometimes read some science fiction or a fairy tale or two.

[OzMick]

What worries me about the whole article is that there are apparently certified fortune tellers in Thailand.

If they are good enough at telling the future to be certified, why is the country in the mess it is in now?

Are they traitors for not warning the country of little things like floods before they occur?

Fortune tellers dont have visions, psychics do. True psychics know what they say has an affect on lives, so they choose not to say much because the weight will be on them.

IMO the boy that said the dam_n would burst was half right, Thailand just went through a disastrous flooding, and the dam_n was probably the largest water retaining structure he could think of that could cause damage on that scale. The South also started to flood during his time of prediction.

Probably too much red/yellow turmoil to get a clear vision.

My psychic dog said "woof" accurately predicting that the neighbour would throw petrol on his garbage fire. Ask me about my stuttering cat!

[ballpoint]

My psychic dog said "woof" accurately predicting that the neighbour would throw petrol on his garbage fire. Ask me about my stuttering cat!

My psychic dog said "Rough" shortly before you made that post.